Vampire Enforcer (Hidden Blood Book 1)

by Al K. Line

  Feeling like a proper mom, I pulled a tissue from a pocket and wiped their faces as they squirmed and protested, but something about their actions told me they liked it too, as though they didn't often get fussed over like this.

  "Okay, you crazy kids, spill it. What's all this about?"

  "Nothing much," said Tom, "just messing around." They exchanged nervous glances, seemingly still loath to tell me even though they'd promised.

  "Come on, guys, I won't be mad, and I did buy you ice cream." I pouted and slouched my shoulders, hoping to play the sympathy card.

  "Fine," said Ben with a sigh, "but don't get cross."

  "Even if I do it won't be with you. How does that sound?"

  "Suppose it's all right."

  "Okay."

  "So?"

  They stopped their fidgeting and stood in front of me, kicking at the grass, then Tom said, "Dad said we were to try to steal your bag, but not really." He looked at his brother for backup but Ben's head was down, seeming more than happy to let his brother continue.

  "Huh? So you were to steal it but not steal it?"

  "Yeah. If you didn't catch us then we were to shout something and run off so you'd chase us and catch us."

  This was getting weird, and the last thing I needed was more weird. "Then what?"

  "Then we were supposed to get all weepy and say we were made to do it and then take you to Dad so he could have a chat."

  "And who is Dad and what is this chat concerning?"

  "Dad is, well, he's Dad, but we aren't meant to say anything else. We aren't meant to tell you this much. We kinda blew the plan."

  "But it can still work," said Ben suddenly perking up. "If you come with us anyway then we still get our money and we get to feed—"

  "No telling!" warned Tom.

  "Guys, you're killing me here. Who is your father? Why would he go to all this trouble?"

  "Because he doesn't trust phones or anything like that, wanted to talk to you without having to come out. So we were meant to make you feel sorry for us and take us home to find out why he made us do it."

  "That is the worst plan I've ever heard. What kind of person makes little kids do stuff like that?" It really was ridiculous, and utterly pointless.

  The twins shifted about, bottom lips began to tremble, and I understood what was going on here. "Er, actually, come to think of it, it's a brilliant plan. Because maybe I wouldn't have gone with you if you'd just come up to me and asked nicely, as I am busy. But with you saying you were made to do it then I'd have to come with you to find out why, right?"

  They brightened instantly, and I knew my hunch was right. It was their plan, they'd convinced their father, whoever he was, that this would be a good idea and he'd let them have their fun.

  "You really think so?" asked Ben. "Cause it was our plan. Dad just wanted us to find you and ask you to come see him but we said someone like you would never do that."

  "Someone like me?"

  "Yeah, all important and working for Head Dancer and being a vampire and stuff."

  "Oh, right." Guess I'd made quite an impression on the boys.

  "So?" asked Ben.

  "Seeing as you did such a good job fooling me I guess there's only one thing for it. Take me to see your dad."

  The twins smiled and ran around the grass whooping, playing a game they'd devised which seemed to involve rugby tackling each other then running away. A few minutes later they came charging back and said, "Now?"

  "Yes, now."

  So we went to meet the father of these two tricksters.

  Meeting Dad

  Being led through the busy heart of Cardiff by two kids in dated red corduroy felt very uncomfortable. This was the number one thing you didn't do as a child, go off with strangers, but they seemed happy to be taking me to their home, and all at the behest of their father.

  Why on earth did he agree to this nonsense, and why did he want to see me anyway? And wasn't he worried about his kids? What if I'd dismissed them? Guess he knew they'd succeed, and allowing them to have some fun and use their plan was the best way to go about it.

  Soon we'd left the city center behind and made our way to an affluent part of the north where tree-lined roads were wide and clean and large houses were fronted by high hedges and decent sized gardens. It wasn't an area for the very rich, but for the rising middle-class.

  The boys babbled away about this and that but nothing that helped me to understand who they were or what this might be about. I hoped it was about my job, not some nonsense about something entirely unrelated.

  Without pausing, the boys led me through a gate that led up a neat garden path past rhododendron bushes in need of a serious prune and then ran up to the front door of a double bay-fronted Victorian house with nice brickwork detail around the windows, and chimneys that twisted and twirled in impressive spirals. They don't build them like that any more, that's for sure.

  I followed, senses on high alert, as they pushed through a green front door and disappeared inside. Feeling all kinds of foolish, but knowing this was how the job worked—meaning, you did a lot of stupid stuff and it somehow all worked out and you got to feel smug after plenty of beatings and a lot of near misses—I eased the door open and stepped into a wide hallway with cracked, original Victorian tiles, an impressive decorative wooden staircase, and a hell of a lot of magic emanating from behind me.

  The moment I felt the presence, the door shut behind me and I turned, eyes darkening, danger teeth primed. Magic scratched my flesh as it whooshed through my system like a freshly cleaned sewer, flushing through me so violently and with such pressure that before I could even stop it small spurts of magic spluttered from my fingertips. My red nail varnish crackled and fizzed and bubbled and so did the tips of my fingers before I got myself under control, used my will to placate the magic. My blistered flesh healed before I could even give the dude hiding behind the door one of my best glares.

  "You better explain what this is about, and fast, or the twins are gonna have a very lonely childhood," I warned, pleased with the line and feeling quite intimidating as I flung back my coat and let the magic sparkle iridescent at my palms, casting its glow on the stark white walls.

  The man smiled at me and held up his hands to appease me. He did not look suitably scared and it kind of took the wind out of my sails.

  I say man, what I mean is anything but.

  "Dad, Dad, can we feed him now?" asked Tom as the twins rushed back into the hall, oblivious to the standoff.

  "Have you been good boys?" he asked, a voice like he was rolling smooth pebbles around his mouth.

  "Of course! Told you our plan would work." The twins high-fived each other, and grinned at us.

  "True, you did. Much better than my idea of just asking Kate here if she'd come see me for a chat." He winked at me and I had to catch myself before I smiled in return.

  "And don't forget our payment," reminded Ben.

  The man fished out a wallet from faded jeans and handed them each a crisp ten pound note. "Don't spend it all on ice cream," he warned, ruffling their fine blond hair and laughing. He had a twinkle in his eye and clearly loved them dearly, but to say something was off is like saying being a vampire makes you peckish for blood now and then.

  "Now can we feed him?"

  "Haha, sure. You know where the food is. Just be careful," he warned "you know what he's like."

  "We know," they chorused. With a quick, "Bye," to me, they dashed off to the right into what I assumed was the kitchen.

  "Now, where were we?" asked the man.

  "You were going to tell me what the hell this is all about before I blast you or bite you or both." I felt back in control a little, or at least able to act like I was.

  The house was strange, everything about it felt wrong. Like they had just moved in, or were in the process of moving out. Our voices echoed, meaning there was little to no furniture. The hall was devoid of anything personal. No pictures, no furniture, not even a rug.
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  Realization hit like catching a whiff of goblin breath and I took a step backward, readying myself for what was to come.

  "Don't worry, I'm not here to do you harm."

  I studied the man properly, just to make sure I wasn't jumping to conclusions. He was average height, wiry but strong looking with a youthfulness of body and brightness of eye that defied his apparent age if my guess was correct. His hair was as pure blond as the twins' and the likeness was startling. Same big blue eyes, same blunt nose, and slightly thin lips. The main difference being he had a neatly trimmed beard. His smile was just as cheeky though, but much colder, apart from when directed at his sons.

  "What am I doing here then? And more to the point, what are you doing here?"

  "Why, isn't that obvious?" he asked, still smiling.

  "Just to be sure, tell me."

  And then he uttered the words I knew to be true but I wished weren't. "I've come for the boy. Man, I guess he's a man now. Sorry, it gets confusing. He is with you is he not?"

  "I'm not answering questions like that. I know who you are, what you are, and you should know he's part of my family now."

  "Kate, please understand that I have been sent to retrieve the boy, and nothing you can say or do will alter the fact that I always recover the runaways, although they never get this far, I admit. You would do well to make this as painless as possible. I have shown you courtesy, not just barged into your home and taken him. This way is better, less bloody, but I will have Mithnite."

  "No." I wanted to get out of here as quickly as possible, to get as far away as I could. I needed to warn Mithnite, Faz too. How could we not have seen, how could we not have known? Faz had confirmed what I'd believed, told me that he suspected Mithnite wasn't what he seemed, that there was something going on and that he was keeping secrets from us, but this?

  "You're mistaken, you have to be," I said, searching his face again before I outright asked this man to say it out loud.

  "We don't make mistakes, Kate. Ever."

  "There's a first for everything."

  "YOU WILL HAND OVER THE BOY TODAY."

  The words hit so forcefully that I staggered back and nearly fell, would have if I hadn't caught the newel post. The wood splintered under my grip but I hardly noticed. I was spellbound, unable to take my eyes off the beautiful man that was now nothing of the sort. Like a veil had been lifted, his true self was revealed for just the briefest of moments, so fast it could have been my mind playing tricks on me, except I knew it wasn't.

  This man, this thing, this devil, was glamoring me, and if you thought vampires were good at it then you've never met an honest-to-goodness real life demon before.

  We were sharing our home with a runaway demon. A creature from behind the veil. A genuine immortal creature from one of the endless hells.

  "Bugger," I managed, before I tensed so hard the newel post broke in half and I fell, cracked my head on the freezing tiled floor, and lost consciousness.

  So much for first days at work. They're supposed to be about getting a feel for the job, not being sidetracked by immortal, impossible to kill demons come to take away the lodger you love like a son.

  Feeling Silly

  I came to feeling dizzy and sick, yet not as scared as I'd imagined I'd be. After all, it's not every day you get to meet a genuine demon, certainly not one so charming. And it was the first I'd heard of them bringing their kids and pets along on a mission to capture an escapee.

  Magic swept through me unbidden, or was it the healing of the vampire? It was already becoming hard to tell the difference, everything coalescing and combining to form my new nature. Working in tandem and slowly integrating until soon I wouldn't know how I did all the wonderful things I was capable of, like breaking newel posts and cracking my head. Ugh, what a total noob.

  Groaning from shame rather than pain, I opened my eyes and sat up, surprised to find myself on a sofa in an otherwise empty living room.

  "What's your name?" I asked the man sitting cross-legged on the floor, staring at me with his nice smile and his twinkly eyes.

  "Kimceuzhor. But you can call me Kim."

  "Not very demonic, being called Kim," I noted, feeling bizarrely let down.

  Kim shrugged. "I'm not here to impress, I'm here to do my job. He's been gone for hours now, it's time to go get him."

  "Hours, what are you talking about?"

  "Ah, yes, the boy-man you call Mithnite Soos may have been here for a while as you see time, but trust me, he has only just escaped from his true home, and it's time he returned."

  "Does he know what he really is? How can he be? He was born here wasn't he, grew up here? How can he have just escaped from, er, where exactly has he escaped from?" I may have been babbling but I was still surprised how well I was taking it, truth be told. Maybe because it was so bizarre, so ridiculous and impossible that it felt like a dream, a fantasy rather than the truth.

  "He knows, is fully aware of the crime he has committed. Actually, multiple crimes. Stepped on a lot of hooves has our young demon."

  "I'm sure he didn't mean it," I said, knowing it sounded lame.

  "He meant it. He has responsibilities, a job to perform. He can't go swanning off to earth whenever he wants, that's not how it works."

  "It does for some. Our friend, Intus, she's a demon of sorts, a devil, if there's a difference, and she comes and goes all the time."

  "Imps, ha! They work, they all work. They have their roles same as we all do, it's just that they enjoy their occupation a little more than most. Although, I have to say, I take great pleasure in my work too. Most satisfying, to know you've kept things in balance. I sleep like a baby demon every night."

  "You don't have nights, do you?" I asked suspiciously.

  "Figure of speech. Just trying to make you feel more relaxed."

  "Relaxed? Relaxed! How can I relax when you tricked me into coming here just so you could tell me the man living with me is a runaway demon and you want to take him away from me? He's my son!"

  Kim arched a pretty eyebrow and said, "But he isn't, is he? How long has he lived with you and your husband?"

  "A while," I said cautiously, "but that's not the point. He's family now. We welcomed him into our lives and our home and he isn't going anywhere."

  "You don't get to decide that, I do. And he's coming home, his true home, with me and the young ones."

  "Are you really their father?"

  "What do you think?"

  "Okay, so you are, but why bring them along?"

  Kim unfolded himself and got to his feet and I did the same, not wanting to feel looked down upon. "Because they have to learn. It's hands-on training, the best way. Plus, they wanted an adventure, and they really, really like ice cream."

  I managed an "Ugh," then sat back down. This was becoming more bizarre by the minute.

  Right on cue, noxious fumes like rotting eggs but with added sulphur filled the air, and I readied for the eardrum assault.

  "You called?" boomed Intus from my shoulder, her five centimeter height in no way corresponding to the loud baritone that would have burst my eardrum if it wasn't for the magic that thickened it.

  "No, I didn't," I said, putting out my hand for her to hop onto.

  Instead, she peered down, frowned at my white t-shirt, but nonetheless put her hands together and dove under the cotton only to surface moments later. It was strange behavior for a female imp but Intus genuinely doesn't see the issue no matter how may times it's explained to her.

  "Oh," she said, her round, red demon head poking out the top. She smiled her odd smile, which would be terrifying if she were full-sized. Row after row of needle-sharp teeth glistened and her weird tongue licked out like a lizard's. I felt her claws against my skin as she wriggled and her forked tail kept jabbing at me but what's a few incisions between friends?

  Her ears flattened as she looked into my eyes, then stood erect as her bald head wrinkled and she said, "Hello, Kate, got any Marmite?" Imps love Ma
rmite almost as much as they love lava. Drinking it, bathing in it, staring at it.

  "Sorry, Intus, this is bad timing. Although..." A wicked thought came to me and before Kim could reach us I grabbed Intus, pulled her to my mouth and whispered in her ear.

  She nodded, then turned to stare at Kim, who, considering the size difference, was looking rather worried. "I know you," said Intus. "We're neighbors, right?"

  "If you mean neighbors as in coming from two worlds separated by time and space then yes, practically next door." Kim glanced around the room nervously and I knew my hunch was right.

  "No need to be rude, Mr. Kimceuzhor. It always pays to be polite." It was an odd contradiction, but imps are always immensely polite, even when they're hiding your keys, or stealing odd socks and driving you crazy as you were certain you'd bunched the pair up when you put them away. As Kim had said, imps love their work, which mostly consists of messing with humans in childish ways like shifting furniture a little or hiding the milk so you think you've gone mad then when you open the door again there it is, right on the shelf where it always is.

  "Sorry, Intus. Yes," he sighed, "we are neighbors."

  "I knew it! You're that dude who came stomping about when you thought we'd nicked your Staff of Perpetual Suffering, getting all hoighty-toighty and throwing around accusations. You're a Creator."

  "What!? Really?" I shouted, the information hardly making me feel better.

  "I... er... yes, that was me."

  "And where was it? Where did you find it in the end?" Intus winked at me, enjoying herself immensely.

  "It was where I'd left it, next to the Bridge of Eternal Damnation." Kim shook his head in frustration, knowing only too well that this was how it went when talking to imps, and Intus in particular. Intus is an enforcer, just like I now was, the imps so troublesome and mischievous that one in ten of them has the role of hauling the troublemakers back home to impland or whatever it's called.