Fall for Me

by Alexis Noelle

  She turns back to me and the smile I’d been staring at all morning is gone. “Carter, this is my boyfriend, Chris. Chris, this is Carter. He saved me from getting lost all morning.”

  Her boyfriend? What? I’d never even thought to ask her if she had a boyfriend. I can’t say I’m surprised though. “We’ve met before.” I couldn’t hide my sullen expression. I’m definitely disappointed. I look up at Chris and can tell he is loving it. He knew exactly what I’d wanted. “Well, I’m gonna get going. I’ll see you on Wednesday, Maddy.”

  I get up, throw my stuff away and walk out the door, away from the only girl in a long time that has managed to keep my attention...

  Chapter Three

  Madison

  Carter looked so surprised when I said Chris was my boyfriend, that maybe I wasn’t imagining that he might be interested in me. Was it possible that Carter liked me? I mean why else would he have seemed so upset when Chris showed up.

  Chris is still standing behind me. I hate feeling like his possession, his trophy. However, being someone’s trophy is much better than opening up your heart to someone and being hurt. I’ve been hurt and abandoned so much in my life that I don’t want to try anymore.

  Chris treats me okay, I guess, and he seems to be happy with me. That is enough right now. I know that no matter what, Chris can’t break my heart because I have no intention of giving it to him.

  Carter, on the other hand, scares me. I felt things in the three hours I was with him that I’ve never felt before, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to run away from it. I don’t need any complications in my life right now. I just need to focus on my classes and making my relationship work. I guess, in a way, it is good that Chris came when he did. I was getting too comfortable with Carter.

  Chris sits down next to me. “What the hell where you doing having lunch with Carter James?” Shit, was he mad? How did he know Carter?

  “He is in my first three classes and offered to show me where to go and stuff. You’re back early. I thought you weren’t getting in until tomorrow.” He looks at me for what seems like forever. Can he tell that I am attracted to Carter? God, I hope not.

  “Let’s go back to your room.” He stands up and holds out a hand to me. This is not good. Damn, I should have just told Carter no.

  The walk to my building takes about half the normal time because Chris is practically pulling me with him. I can tell he is angry. His whole body is tense. I am dreading getting to my room. I’m silently praying my roommate is there, but her emails said she’d be getting in later tonight. We get to my door and I unlock it. Chris pushes me in and closes the door. I trip on the way in and am now on the floor, looking up at him.

  “You are mine! That means you don’t disrespect me by sitting there and flirting with Carter Fucking James at my school!” His foot finds my side, and I bite back the scream that tries to push its way out. “You want to go be with him, Madison? You want to go be one of the many whores he fucks and never calls again?” Another kick, this time against my thigh. “You will stay away from him and any other prick that comes up to you, do you understand me?” I am crying so hard all I can do is nod. He opens the door, slams it, and leaves me there.

  I hate that he gets like this, and I hate myself for letting it happen. The first time Chris had ever hit me was our first summer together.

  We were going to the beach with his family and I’d just bought a new bikini. I wanted to look nice for him. We were only on the beach for about a half hour when he leaned in my ear and said we were leaving because I didn’t feel good. I felt fine and was confused by it, but I figured if he wanted to leave then we should go. We said our goodbyes to his family and drove back to his house.

  He wouldn’t talk to me the whole way home and when we got there, he dragged me up to his room. As soon as he closed the door, he slapped me so hard that I fell to the floor. He called me a slut for wearing that bathing suit, and told me he could see how much I loved all the guys’ attention. That couldn’t have been farther from the truth. I hated being the center of attention. After that day, he never asked me to go to the beach again.

  * * *

  When I get to class Wednesday morning, Carter is waiting for me and it brings a smile to my face. I quickly wipe it off, though. “Carter, listen, we can’t hang out again like we did on Monday.”

  “Why? Did I do something wrong?” I can tell by his expression that he is confused.

  God, this is harder than it should be. “No, you didn’t do anything. It’s just best if we don’t hang out.”

  “Let me guess. Your boyfriend doesn’t want you hanging out around the lower class. You know, Madison, I thought you were better than that.” He walks into class.

  I hate that he thinks I’m that type of person.

  I’m not, but he is right saying that Chris is.

  I’m more like Carter then he knows.

  Chapter Four

  Carter

  Why the hell am I so upset? I barely know the girl and she has a boyfriend. The thing is, I know I wasn’t imagining things. There is something between us, and it has been the first real thing I’ve felt in a while. I know that fucker Chris is the one who is behind this. I steal a glance at her during class every chance I can. Luckily, she never catches me.

  When she sits down in English, she winces like she’s been hurt and I wonder what it’s about. I know that Chris has a reputation of getting rough with people and I heard a friend of mine saying he hit one of his sister’s friends. I need to catch her outside and talk to her.

  I am packed up and ready to leave five minutes before the bell rings. I need to catch Maddy and talk to her. The professor dismisses us and I race out the door. I want to be waiting for her. I see her leave and step up beside her. “I need to talk to you.” The look on her face is unreadable, but she seems sad.

  “Why? I thought I pretty much said everything I needed to this morning.”

  Ouch. “Five minutes?”

  “Okay…” she hesitates, “what?”

  How do I even ask this? “Are you okay? You seemed upset when you walked in. I saw you when you sat down and you seemed like you were in pain. Did something happen? “

  I can see in her eyes that something is wrong. “Carter, I’m fine, but I need to go now.” I let her go, but I have this nagging feeling that something is wrong.

  * * *

  Maddy stays away from me for the next couple of months. Every time I try to get close to her, she will run or duck into one of the classrooms. I have tried to go out and have fun with my friends, but I can’t shake this feeling. Even the guys notice that something is up with me. I don’t understand why I can’t get her out of my system.

  “Carter, listen, we get that you like this girl, but it’s like November; time to move on.” Shawn is looking at me, but he just doesn’t get it.

  None of us were really the relationship kind. We went out, had a good time and sometimes went home with girls, but it had never been with someone long-term. The first day I met Maddy, she was smiling and had that adorable sundress on. But after that, all she wore were jeans and long sleeves, even when it was warm out. I had a feeling that asshole was hurting her, but she wouldn’t talk to me. I know I’m jumping to conclusions and that I probably sound crazy but I know in my gut that I’m right.

  “Listen, I get what you’re saying, but I know something isn’t right and I’m not gonna give up on her. I know you guys don’t get it, but I’ve never felt this connection with any girl I’ve met. She’s been ignoring me for almost two months, but I still find myself looking for her everywhere. I find excuses to talk to her in class. You know me and I’m not one to chase girls, but even that one day of being around her changed that. She’s different and I feel different whenever I’m around her, even when she’s ignoring me.”

  Jason laughs at me. “Carter, you just met this girl! You don’t even know her that well. Maybe you just need to get laid and get her out of your system.”

&n
bsp; That is what I would’ve done before, but it isn’t going to work this time. I’ve tried to forget Maddy. I went home with girls, but I just wasn’t interested.

  I don’t know how to explain it to them, but in the couple hours I spent with Maddy, she got to me. I’ve never met a girl like her, and I don’t want to let her go. I have a feeling that she wants me too, but something is holding her back.

  Chapter Five

  Madison

  Carter is killing me. I’m worried that he knows what is going on. I don’t know how, but he does. I am getting so tired of having to run and hide from him.

  Things with Chris haven’t been any better, either. He gets mad about every little thing. If it isn’t the clothes I wear, it is the fact that I am looking at all the football players when he takes me to the game. I am forced to wear long clothes, even if it is hot outside, so no one can see the bruises. Sometimes, I think about leaving him but, the truth is, I am scared of what he’d do.

  It is like he has this switch in him that just flips and a whole different person takes over. If I am being honest, that person scares the hell out of me.

  I’m sitting in English class right now, trying my best not to look over at Carter, even though I can feel his eyes on me. The professor is talking about a project that will be due before Thanksgiving break and that we’ll be working in pairs.

  My only thought is please don’t put me with him. God can’t be that cruel. He tells us to pair off and everything happens so fast. Everybody is scrambling to get into their pairs and I am looking around for someone to ask.

  I see a guy coming up to me and I know he is going to ask me. But before he reaches me, he gets this fearful look on his face and asks the girl two rows over.

  I glance behind me and Carter is standing there. He looks down at me and gives me that smile. Kill...me...now.

  Our professor goes on to talk about the details of the assignment. We have to do a study on the student body at the university. We need to come up with questions to ask, do surveys, and turn that into a ten page paper and a presentation. Carter couldn’t have possibly looked more pleased with himself.

  My stomach drops. Chris is going to flip out. He didn’t believe me when I told him I never talk to Carter anymore. He hit me last week because he said I was looking at him when we were eating lunch, even though I wasn’t. He’ll never believe me when I tell him I didn’t choose to partner with Carter.

  “Well, we have two weeks before this is due so when do you want to get started and plan it out?” The project is due right before Thanksgiving break, not that I’d be doing anything other than sitting in my dorm during break. “If you want to come over tonight, I don’t have work.”

  Come over? As in to his house? Oh, hell no! I get hit if I glance at a guy, there’s no telling what Chris would do if he found out I was at Carter’s house. Not only that, but with the way Carter makes me feel, us being alone at his house is a horrible idea. What can I say to him? Sorry, I can’t come over to your house because I’m extremely attracted to you and I don’t trust myself? Sorry, I can’t come over because my boyfriend is extremely jealous and will flip his shit?

  “Okay, that sounds great!” Did I really just say that? What the hell am I thinking? I look up at Carter and he is smiling at me in the way that made it hard to breathe.

  “Okay, I’ll see you tonight then. Do you want to give me your number so I can text you the address?”

  My number? Oh, he thinks I’m one of those normal college students and that I have a cell phone. “Sorry, I don’t have a phone.” To say he looks shocked would be an understatement.

  A cell phone required not only money, but people that you want to talk to and I had neither. Well, maybe I had one person that I want to talk to, but that is a bad idea.

  “Um…okay. Well, here then.” He pulls out a piece of paper and scribbles his address on it.

  “Okay…I’ll see you tonight.” A tinge of nervousness mixed with excitement runs through me.

  Chris is waiting for me when I walk out of English and as soon as Carter comes out behind me, Chris’ expression hardens. I know I am in for it but, at this point, it can’t get any worse.

  Carter looks at Chris, smiles, then looks at me. “See you tonight, Maddy.”

  Shit, just got worse. My whole body tenses and I feel like I am going to be sick. I can literally feel the anger radiating off of Chris. Carter doesn’t know what he is doing. He thinks it is all a game, but he has no idea.

  I am used to the drill by now. Chris takes me to my room and locks the door. I turn so my back is to him and brace myself for what I know is coming. He comes up behind me and starts kissing my neck. What is he doing? I hear him undoing his belt. The sound makes every hair on my body stand on its end. I hope he doesn’t think I am ready to have sex right now. I don’t know if I ever will be. That is when I feel his belt slap against my side. I fall to the floor from the impact.

  “Why the fuck are you going to his house tonight? Do you still want to be one of his whores? I can make you a whore just as easily.”

  “We have a project for English, Chris. I swear I didn’t pick him. We were the last two left after everyone had paired off.” I sit on the floor, waiting for him to hit me with it again, but nothing comes. I turn around to see what is going on. He is standing there in front of me with his pants and boxers down, just looking at me. I stiffen as I realize things are about to get a whole lot worse.

  “If you are going to act like a little whore for anyone, it will be for me! Do you understand me?” I nod my head. What does he want from me?

  “I’m the one that puts up with you. Do you really think someone like him is going to want to deal with all your shit, especially when you don’t put out? We aren’t going to have sex right now so stop looking at me like that, but don’t think I’m going to wait much longer. Now, you’re going to suck my dick until I come in that virgin mouth of yours. Then when you’re with him tonight, you’ll remember who you belong to. Got it?”

  I nodded my head. This can’t be happening. I am not ready for this. My first time shouldn’t be something unwanted, something forced. The minute he puts it in my mouth, I start to cry. He warns me to stop or he will make it so I can’t show my face tonight. I try to think of happy things to make this less painful, but I honestly don’t have too many good memories to use. After what seems like an eternity, Chris finishes in my mouth. I run to the bathroom down the hall hoping no one notices my appearance, and throw up until I have nothing left in me.

  When I go back, my roommate Nicole is there. She takes one look at me and I swear, somehow, she knows. Chris doesn’t like me hanging out with her because he says she is too nosy for her own good. I change and get ready to go to Carter’s house, although I don’t know how I am going to face him now.

  Chapter Six

  Carter

  Knock knock

  Maddy must be here. I walk to the door and my heart starts beating faster. When I open it, the look on her face stops me in my tracks. What the heck happened to her? She looks presentable on the outside, but I can see the pain in her eyes. What is she hiding?

  “Hey, come in.” She walks into my house, and it feels so good to have her here. “I made dinner because I figured you’d be hungry. I hope ravioli is okay. It is the one thing I’m half-decent at making.”

  She smiled at me. “That was really nice of you, Carter, thank you.”

  I make us plates and we sit down at the table. I try to make small talk, but all I am getting are one-word answers.

  She looks up at me. “So, what topic do you think we should do the project on?” That is so not what I want to talk about right now, but at least she is talking to me. “I’m thinking we could do a study on tuition rates and whether students feel that what they’re paying is fair. We can ask them about all of the different fees. Maybe even see if they’re aware of all of them. I also think we should try to find out if they feel they’re getting what they pay for.”

  �
��I really like that idea. If you want, I can type up a sample survey and email it to you. You can change anything you need to. Then we can pick a day next week and survey random students.”

  “Okay, that sounds good.” She takes her plate to the kitchen, washes it off and sticks it in the dishwasher. I see her going for her coat. She can’t leave yet, she just got here.

  “Maddy, please don’t go yet.”

  “Why, Carter? We both know I shouldn’t be here. You know you didn’t need to taunt Chris like that earlier, either.”

  Just hearing her say that asshole’s name pisses me off. I know Chris because he used to come up here to party with some of his friends last year. He had a habit of running his mouth. In fact, he and Jason almost got into a fight. I just don’t get what she sees in him. I’ve seen him with other girls when he visited campus and he was an asshole to them. I’m not a saint and admit to having my share of girls, but I always treat them with respect.

  “Listen, I know I acted like an asshole and I’m sorry. It just drives me crazy that you’re with him, Maddy. I can see that you’re not happy. Where is that girl I met the first day who had that great smile? You never smile when you’re with him and that’s a damn shame because you have a beautiful smile.”

  I see the blush creeping up her face and, before I know what I am doing, I go over to her and kiss her. Her lips are just as soft as I imagined they’d be. She gasps and I take advantage, slipping my tongue into her mouth. I can tell she isn’t experienced, but it doesn’t matter. This is the best kiss I’ve ever had. She pulls away suddenly, grabs her jacket, and runs for the door. I catch up with her, grabbing her arm in an attempt to convince her to stay. “Maddy, please stay.”