Restless Storm

by Jamie Summer

  “Not a problem at all,” Anna said, a wide grin spreading across her face.

  I arched a brow, unsure what went on in her mind.

  “I know the right thing to spend our time with.” Anna vanished into the living room and returned two minutes later with two Blu-rays in her hand, holding each up. “Thor or Skull Island?”

  I had to smile. Seems my friend hadn't forgotten my obsession with Tom Hiddleston.

  “Both?” I asked. Anna jumped up and down, her arms flailing at her sides.

  “Perfect answer,” she replied. “I also know Mom will approve of the choices, so she’ll probably join when she gets back.” The wide grin she sported was infectious. I found myself smiling along. “Now, let’s finish eating, then move to the living room. Tom is waiting.”

  I woke up to the sound of soft rain against the window. I had slept on and off, plagued by nightmares I had forgotten about. It didn't take a genius to figure out why they were back.

  Dreams of being out on a boat, caught in a storm with nowhere to go, were as prominent as the ones where I found myself drowning.

  I slept three hours at most and it showed. I was barely able to keep my eyes open, and my whole body ached. There was a darkness that had settled in my stomach, making me feel unmotivated and cranky. I tried to fight against it by taking a shower and opening the window to get some fresh air, but the rain on my face reminded me Mother Nature wasn’t here to give me a break.

  I got dressed, then walked into the hall, hearing quiet voices coming from the kitchen. Judging by the few words I caught, Grace needed to go out to check on the church while Anna prepared breakfast. Both ladies looked up as I entered. I smiled at them, giving a little wave.

  “Ah, perfect. You’re up. That means I can leave this one and know she’s in good hands. You know her and the kitchen. I still don’t trust her to use it responsibly and not burn the house down.” Grace grinned, making me laugh.

  I remembered Anna’s few failed attempts at making something to eat and completely understood Grace’s worries.

  “I’ll take good care of the kitchen while you’re gone,” I assured her. With a kiss on the cheek for both of us, Grace walked out the door.

  Anna put her hands on her hips. “Thanks. I’m never inviting you over again. You didn’t even take my side. That time I burned the muffins, it was because you made us watch Tom Hiddleston videos, nothing else. I would’ve had everything under control were it not for that nice specimen.”

  I laughed louder, the memory of that very day playing in my mind.

  “Don't you dare laugh, missy. This is no laughing matter.” That only made me laugh more.

  Five minutes later, after I finally managed to pull myself together, I walked over to the stove where Anna stood and studied the chaos in front of me.

  “What exactly are you trying to make?” I asked, perusing the array of eggs, some kind of batter, and uncooked bacon.

  “I had planned to ask you what you wanted and go from there,” she explained matter-of-factly. I hugged her briefly before pushing her toward the end of the counter.

  “You stay right there while I prepare breakfast.”

  She shrugged. “You’re the guest.”

  “Since when? I’ve been a part of this house as much as you’ve been part of mine. So I’m gonna prepare breakfast while you simply stand there and look pretty.”

  Anna turned her head sideways. She eyed me for way too long before nodding. Whatever she saw in my expression had obviously satisfied her.

  I went to work, starting with the eggs and bacon before focusing on what I assumed was the pancake batter. “You got syrup?” I asked. Wordlessly, Anna walked over to the cabinet and pulled it out.

  “Always for you,” she replied and started to set the table.

  Ten minutes later, we both started downing our food. I hadn’t realized how hungry I was until everything was on the table. I had no idea why. I ate way more than I should’ve the night before. Oh well. I wasn’t going to deprive myself of the delicious array in front of me.

  “When we're done here, I thought we could walk around the island a little, then stop by the house. I got the keys from Earl yesterday, so whenever you’re ready.”

  And just like that, the contents of my stomach wanted to come up again. The sudden heaviness at the breakfast table was undeniable.

  “We don’t have to, but I know part of you wants to. This house is part of your history, part of you, and you should visit before everything possibly becomes just that—history.”

  I knew she had a point. The mere thought of the storm destroying everything my father built made my stomach turn. I didn’t want it to happen, but knew there was no way to prevent it.

  “Okay,” I agreed.

  The way Anna’s eyes widened made it perfectly clear she hadn’t expected me to agree so quickly. I didn’t blame her.

  “Perfect. Let’s finish up. It’s amazing, by the way. I had completely forgotten what a great cook you are. Are you doing anything in that area now? In the city where you work, I mean.”

  I knew Anna was curious about my new life, but so far, I had only filled her in on the necessary parts, staying away from how pathetic my existence had been in a town where I didn’t feel at home.

  I told her a little more about my job, about my non-existent social life, and about my sparsely decorated apartment. Anna listened attentively and asked a question here and there, without judgment.

  Once we finished eating, Anna told me to stay put as she cleared off the table. She put the dishes in the dishwasher, and though I offered to help more than once, she refused again and again.

  “Ready?” she asked after finishing up.

  I had feared this moment. Was I ready? Would I ever be ready?

  “If you don’t feel comfortable, Maddy, we can leave at any point.”

  “No, let’s go,” I said, trying to smile. There was no way she didn’t see how nervous I was. My hands shook, and I bit my lip so hard, I was sure I drew blood. Before I could rethink my decision, I made a mad dash for the hallway, got dressed, and walked outside.

  Chapter Six

  Jake

  I opened my eyes, the sun peeking around my drapes. According to the clock on my nightstand, it was past nine a.m. I slowly swung my legs out of bed and sat up, trying to get the sleep out of my eyes.

  I was scheduled for the late shift today, so I was in no hurry, even having enough time to get a coffee before I had to leave.

  Bridget wasn’t lying next to me, which wasn't unusual. She had to leave early whenever she took a shift at the local school, something she did more and more of these days. She also had taken to sleeping at her own place more frequently again.

  I stared at her empty side of the bed and waited for a sadness to set in. Something that would make it obvious I missed waking up next to her. There was nothing. The realization confused me, my conversation with Anna springing to mind.

  Shaking off the doubts, I made my way into the kitchen and put the coffee on before walking out the front door and grabbing the newspaper from the yard. The news was a day old, since it was delivered from the mainland the next day, but I didn’t mind. The main headline was about the storm heading our way. I decided to forego my morning read. I didn’t need to hear more about all the possible scenarios waiting for us. I was well aware.

  When the coffee machine beeped, I walked over and poured a cup right before the doorbell rang. I wasn’t expecting any visitors.

  I walked into to the hallway, my eyes widening when I recognized the person standing on the other side of the screen door.

  “Good morning, Grace,” I greeted her. “To what do I owe this pleasure?” I was curious as to what brought her here. Then it hit me. “Is everything okay with Maddy?” My heart tried to beat out of my chest at the thought of something happening to her. I opened the door in a rush.

  The woman in front of me smiled. “Funny how your first worry is for her, isn’t it?” There wasn’t a
ny judgment in her voice, even though I was pretty sure I would’ve deserved it. “However, she is the reason I’m here.”

  I braced myself for what was to come. Grace didn’t stop by my house for no reason. If she made the trip out here, there had to be something important she needed to say.

  “I don’t know the details of what went on between the two of you, and I don’t want to know. What I do know is there is a woman at my house who’s lost, who hasn’t found her way home yet. There is a deep sadness within her neither Anna nor I can lift. The moment she saw you in the bar, something changed within her. Some of her tension eased. She tried to hide it…badly, I might add…but I saw the glimpse of light she still carried within her. You were the one who brought it out.”

  I stared at Grace, unable to form words. My heart raced and a warm feeling spread through my chest. Hope was a dangerous thing if you held on to it too tightly.

  “I know there was a reason you called her because of the storm. And I know there was a reason you asked Anna and me to pick her up and didn't do it yourself. Whatever it was, she needs you. There’s a part of her gravitating toward you, whether she realizes it or not. Right now, she needs people she can trust, people she can lean on.”

  “Why are you telling me this? I’m sure she doesn’t want to see me.”

  “Be that as it may, Jake, sometimes people surprise you. Try, okay? For me?”

  I barely nodded, but when she smiled, I knew it was the response she had been looking for. She leaned in to give me a kiss on the cheek, then turned and strode down my front walk. She stopped and glanced over her shoulder.

  “They’ll be stopping by the house today. In case you were wondering.”

  I wasn’t, but the tightening of my stomach proved I wasn't as nonchalant as I wanted to be. It didn’t matter how hard I tried. Wherever I went, whomever I saw, whatever I did, Maddy had been in my mind ever since she returned to Crystal Cove. Work, the pub, everything. There was no escaping the pull she had on me, even after all this time.

  I watched Grace leave, wanting to ask her so many questions.

  Did Maddy ask about me? How was she doing? Was she okay?

  Maybe Grace was right. Maybe I should stop by her dad’s house during my lunch break. Just to say hi.

  God, this was a mess of epic proportions. And it was no one’s fault but mine.

  I inhaled the fresh sea air, noticing the rain falling for the first time. I didn’t care that I was soaked when I went inside.

  Maddy loved the rain. We’d sometimes stand outside, reveling in the water falling from the sky.

  Enough.

  I pushed Maddy to the back of my mind as I walked into the kitchen. I needed to start my day.

  Time passed quickly. With the impending storm, people needed help on all fronts, and I was only too happy to oblige. It didn’t matter the job. The heavier the manual labor, the better. Dustin had given us the liberty to help where we could. He loved the people on this island, so he was willing to do whatever it took to make sure they were safe. Including letting his own men skip out on the office work they were hired for.

  Before long, it was time for lunch, and despite having mulled over the idea of going to Maddy’s a hundred times and realizing what a bad idea it was, I found myself walking up the gravel road to where I knew her dad had built their home.

  My hands were clammy, and though the rain came down steadily, I knew that had nothing to do with it. My chest felt a little tighter than usual, my breathing depicting only a fraction of the calmness I normally portrayed. I hated how nervous I was.

  I tried to busy myself with looking at the surroundings, wondering how much of the island’s beauty would be left after the storm. Would it still be inhabitable? Would the trees, flowers, and everything else survive the devastation? If the reports were correct, it was hard to imagine. The thought made my stomach churn. This island was my home. The mere image of it being destroyed put an added weight on my shoulders.

  “Jake?”

  I hadn't heard anyone come up behind me, too lost in my own head. I glanced back, seeing Anna standing in the path. “Hi.”

  “What are you doing here?”

  Though it seemed like an innocent enough question, it was more loaded than I cared to admit.

  “I wanted to…”

  Yeah, what exactly did I want? I let my words hang in the air, hoping Anna would know the answer herself. Her expression didn't change for a few moments before her lips turned upward. I knew it was supposed to be a smile, but it looked more like a grimace.

  “I’m not sure she’s ready, Jake. I let her go in alone because it’s what she wanted. I didn’t feel good about it, but having you here only complicates things.”

  The words stung, even though I knew Anna was right. Maddy didn't need me as an additional reminder to her past. I should’ve never listened to Grace.

  What the hell was I thinking?

  “I know you love her, so I know you’ll give her all the space she needs, right?”

  Hearing the truth put out like that should've been embarrassing. It wasn't. I felt relieved someone actually said what I never could admit to myself.

  I wanted to tell Maddy so many times. When she was still here, when her dad died. It never felt like the right time.

  Then she left, taking my future with her.

  I started to reply when I felt the air around us change. We were a few hundred yards from the house, hidden from view, yet I felt her gaze on me before I saw her. I closed my eyes, my body humming with electricity, every nerve on alert.

  I heard a small gasp escape Anna’s lips. I didn’t think she expected this. Something told me she'd wanted to have me gone before Maddy even realized I’d been there.

  “Maddy, I—” she started, then stopped. My back was still turned toward the woman in question, so I had no idea about the silent conversation between the two. “Okay.”

  I heard retreating footsteps. I figured Maddy had walked away. While my heart broke into tiny little pieces, part of me didn't blame her.

  “Anna…,” I whispered, opening my eyes and seeing her walking away. I spun around.

  Maddy.

  Staring at her, I tried to find something to say, but the rush of having her so close made it hard to focus on one thought in particular.

  Maddy wore ripped blue jeans and a red sweater. It was way too large for her, hiding her beautiful body, but I knew it was exactly how she liked it. Her eyes were swollen and red, no doubt from the overwhelming emotions she had to deal with when returning home. There was sadness and pain written all over her face. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold her, never let her go again.

  “What are you doing here?” Her voice sounded raw, as if she had spent most of the past few hours crying. It made my urge to shelter her from all the evil in the world even worse.

  The loaded question didn't help. I wanted to be there for her when she hurt. Wanted to be there when she thought nothing could ever fix her heart.

  “I wanted to…” I swallowed. “God, Maddy.” My voice conveyed everything I couldn't put into words, and by the way her eyes widened, she felt it, too.

  “I’m not staying,” she whispered. Though it shouldn't have surprised me, it still hurt to hear the words come from her lips. “I came here to get what matters to me, then I’ll leave.”

  At one point, I was someone who mattered to you. I sighed as the thought struck me.

  “From what Anna and Grace told me, it’s gonna be a hard one. Maybe you should go to the mainland, too.”

  “This is my home. I won’t abandon it,” I replied.

  Maddy’s penetrating gaze made me instantly regret the words.

  “Maddy, that’s not—”

  “You have no idea what it was like. You didn't lose your dad, the only family you had left. The only person who truly tied you to the island.”

  So I didn't matter? Dammit. I really needed to shut my mind off.

  “So don't talk to me about ab
andonment, Jake.” Anger had replaced the pain on her face, but I wasn't sure whether to be happy or sad about it. “I only came out here to tell you I don't need your help. I appreciate you calling me, but Anna and Grace are taking good care of me.”

  The knife turned in my stomach, making me bleed from the inside. I wanted to remain immune to her words, to not care, but seeing her up close brought all those emotions right back to where they'd been two years ago.

  Maddy held my gaze. As much as I wanted to see she still cared, all I saw was the broken shell of the person I loved.

  And, by God, that hurt.

  “I’m sorry. For everything.” I needed to leave, give her space. But what if the space I gave her ended up being a distance we didn’t know how to get back from? What if saying goodbye now was our finale?

  “You don't need to be sorry. I know it wasn't your fault, but it still hurts too much, Jake. I can't allow myself to care for someone who will put this island before me.”

  I wanted to tell her I would always put her first when I realized I wasn’t sure it was the truth. If she asked me to leave right now, I would stay here, no matter the impending storm.

  Meaning I’d put this island before her.

  Not knowing what else to do, I turned and walked away. With every step, the weight on my chest grew. I wanted to run and hold her until she realized I’d make sure she was happy, but I couldn't. Not until she let me in again.

  I hoped the day would come. I wasn't sure I was strong enough to lose her a second time.

  Chapter Seven

  Maddy

  I heard them talking. They weren't loud, but the wind carried their voices right onto the porch where I stood. I contemplated walking back inside, but my feet moved down the steps of their own accord.

  I wanted to see him. Wanted to see if the sliver of connection between us was always just a figment of my imagination.

  I wasn’t prepared for what I found.