The Wrong Sister

by Leanne Davis

  She seemed ten years older than her thirty-two years. She seemed haggard. How did her kids not realize something drastic was going on? Well, thank God, they hadn’t yet.

  Her clothes were the same sweats and t-shirt Donny saw her wearing yesterday. She must’ve slept in them. Micah’s dried blood was spattered in spots on her shirt.

  Donny sighed and closed his eyes. “I know. I just really need you to do this today. I’ll make other arrangements tomorrow. Please? I can’t miss work. You know why. Your husband is the reason why. And why I can no longer afford daycare. And Vickie’s working too. We need every dime we can scrounge, since I’m now on the brink of losing everything. I have the unique opportunity to meet with your loser husband this afternoon and go over in detail what he did to me. So yeah, I get it, Tracy.”

  They stared at each other hard, two sets of eyes narrowing in anger and possibly, hatred.

  “Vickie isn’t working.”

  “How do you know what Vickie is doing? When have you ever given two shits about her? Other than laughing at her and gossiping about her with Gretchen?”

  Tracy’s mouth fell open. “Are you kidding me? My sister only had me and Gretchen until you came around.”

  “You know nothing about her. She can’t watch Julia today. Just… please do this for me. You owe me.”

  Her mouth opened. “How do you figure I owe you?”

  He sighed and shook his head. “Because soon, I’ll be taking care of Vickie, you, Julia, Ally and Kylie. Didn’t you listen to him? Soon, he’ll be gone. I know you love your father and mother, but why do you think Vickie is lacking in the most basic common sense and life skills? They don’t deal well with reality. It’ll be me.”

  “And me,” she grumbled at him. “I’m not her mother, Donny. You need to figure it out with Vickie.”

  “Please. Today. I just can’t deal with it now. I have a really important potential client and I’m going to be late. I can’t lose him. You know why.”

  She pursed her lips in contempt. How dare he do this to her today? He knew that was what she was thinking. She had her own children to deal with, and her own life, which was falling apart. She had no interest in changing his child’s diapers and wiping her spittle up.

  She relented only when Julia glanced up at her and started gurgling with happy smiles and baby-spit bubbles. Julia always wanted Tracy. Tracy put her hands out and took the chubby bundle, now just over a year old. She grimaced. “She needs a bath. My God, Donny,” she nearly screeched with disdain.

  “I know. I know. I ran out of time this morning. Vickie and I have… well, I was trying to figure out how to tell her what happened. Anyway, I ran out of time. Would you…?”

  She gritted her teeth. “You are unbelievable. Start grooming your own damn child. But fine. Like I’ll punish the baby for your bad behavior.” Tracy tugged on the diaper bag strung over Donny’s shoulder. She turned to go, but stopped and looked back at him over her shoulder. “Did you?”

  “Did I what?” He frowned, pausing momentarily.

  “Figure out what’s happening?”

  He closed his eyes and pressed a hand between them. “No,” he said. His tone was so seriously sad and solemn, it made Tracy’s eyelids overflow with tears. “No, Tracy, I haven’t figured out how we all got here. Or what we can do now about it.”

  She sagged her shoulder against the front door. “I need my sister. I want her here so much. I can’t imagine doing this without her.”

  He knew she didn’t mean Vickie. He could have used his own brother as well. Tony, his brother, recently married Gretchen, Tracy and Vickie’s older sister. Weird damn coincidence.“I could use Tony too.”

  Tracy finally met his gaze without the anger. “Are you calling him?”

  He shook his head. “It’s not fair. They’ve just gotten somewhere decent. I simply can’t lay this on them now.” Plus, he couldn’t stand letting Tony or his parents know how low his once positive and happy life had sunk, nearing uncharted depths. Or how right Tony was about Vickie, just not for any of the reasons most people thought.

  Tracy nodded. “I was thinking the same thing.”

  He met her gaze and held it. “Exactly. It’s you and me, Tracy. You might as well start to accept that.”

  He turned and left her staring after him in dismay with confusion shining in her eyes.

  ****

  Tracy slammed the door after hearing Donny’s rather haunting, final statement upon his departure. It was so depressing. She jiggled Julia, who reached up and grabbed her cheek and pinched it. Tracy sighed. She did not want to deal with the one-year-old today. Still not walking, Julia often grew frustrated and screamed quite a bit. She wasn’t nearly as docile and well behaved as Tracy’s two kids were. Then again, Tracy was their mother, not Vickie. They had no reason not to be happy, well-adjusted babies. Unfortunately for Julia, she couldn’t claim such a luxury.

  She gazed at the little girl, who was a stunning child. Almost ethereal in her beauty, she looked so much like Vickie did as a baby. Blond ringlets crowned her perfectly shaped head. With huge, dark eyes, and little pink lips, and round cheeks, she was the spitting image of Vickie.

  “No doubt you’ll be as obnoxiously beautiful as your mother. And you’ll probably grow up and use it to catch any available loser you can find to support you, just like your mother. Not that Donny’s a loser. Just an idiot to fall for it all. Now there’s you. I really don’t want to deal with you.”

  Julia listened to Tracy’s voice, her solemn gaze becoming more intent as if she took in each and every word with complete understanding. Tracy shifted her feet uncomfortably. Okay, she was being a complete bitch. It wasn’t the poor child’s fault who her mother was. Or that she was so pretty. Or that Tracy’s life was falling apart and she didn’t really feel like babysitting. Julia’s little face started to crumble.

  Tracy nearly panicked and pulled Julia against her chest as she crooned to her. “I’m sorry, baby girl. Auntie’s here. I’ve got you. I’ll take good care of you. Shh, my girl. I’m here.”

  Who would take care of Tracy though?

  “Mom?”

  Tracy jerked out of the little reverie, quickly shifting her weight from one foot to the other and dancing Julia around to make up for saying such awful things to her. She shifted Julia’s weight and let her wrap her plump legs around Tracy’s waist. “Hey, sweetie. What’s up?”

  “I didn't know Julia was coming over today. I wish I could stay home with you guys.”

  She smiled as she passed Kylie. Her younger daughter followed her into their kitchen. She automatically started making breakfast for her daughters and Julia. “Did you finish your study guide for math?”

  Kylie sighed. As a fifth grader, she was struggling to keep up. “I did. I’ll get it. Did I tell you what Corey told me?”

  Placing Julia in a safe spot in the kitchen, Tracy handed her some of the toys that were still out from her last visit. Tracy grimaced as she glanced around and finally saw what was directly in front of her. Holy Crap. It was awful. The dishes weren’t done. Mail and family paraphernalia were scattered all over the counters. It was a large kitchen, featuring a big island, and almost every square inch of it was cluttered and covered with something or other. Ally’s science notebook was still open and forgotten at the table.

  For the last few days, Tracy told the girls she wasn’t feeling well. It really wasn’t a lie because when had she ever felt worse? So it wasn’t a lie. She barely had enough energy to heat up a pizza for dinner the night before. The floor needed a good sweeping, and all the counters were covered in crumbs and spilled drops from last night’s milk or whatever. She shook her head. It was time to face her kids, her house, and her daily life as it was now. And would forever be. Starting with actually listening to her daughter’s anecdote.

  Making eye contact with Kylie, she automatically grabbed the whole wheat bread. She hoped some toast would make up for the crappy dinners she’d been throwing together of late
. Their nutrition had fled along with their money. “No. What did Corey tell you?” Corey was her semi-best friend, but only when they weren’t fighting over the other friend, Janey.

  “She said Janey is going to ask her to go to summer camp with her. Do you think that’s true? I thought, well, I guess I hoped, Janey was going to ask me.”

  Tracy shook her head. Summer camp? It was barely October. “You don’t think she will now?”

  “Not if she asks Corey. She can only ask one person. I swear, she said it was going to be me.”

  “Well, you haven’t talked to Janey yet. Don’t draw any conclusions or invest too much drama until you know for sure. Remember: half of what your friends or classmates tell you is usually wrong or just gossip.”

  “Not all of it,” Kylie bristled. Tracy finally found a reason to smile. School had yet to change, in her experience. The social hierarchy was tough, and the gossip was never reliable. Statements like “so and so says this in so and so’s presence” were untrue or incorrect, if they were even real.

  “Still. Ask Janey today.”

  “What if she thinks I’m fishing for the invite?”

  “Don’t you want to be invited?”

  “Yes. But only if she wants to do it on her own. If I ask her, she might think I’m hinting at it. Or realize that Corey and I discussed it. Corey said I wasn’t supposed to say anything to anyone. It’s all a big secret.” Kylie wrinkled her brows. Duh. Tracy sensed she wasn’t on her usual game and couldn’t get all the teeny-bopper speak correctly today. Kylie had red hair and gray eyes, and looked almost exactly like Tracy did as a child.

  Her sister, Alissa called nothing but Ally, meanwhile, looked just like Micah, with light brown hair and dark eyes. Her eyes were clones of his: deep, dark and soulful. Well… someday, soulful. At eleven years old, they were more like anti-soulful and somewhat shallow, but someday, they would be as profound as Micah’s.

  Julia suddenly shrieked and started banging a wooden spoon against a metal pan. Tracy had given them to her when she wouldn’t stop crying the other day. Tracy sighed as she quickly buttered Kylie’s toast and started gathering Ally’s stuff together. The sixth grader was a mess and left a trail of homework, accessories, clothes and books in her wake. Kylie kept talking about the complicated situation she was in, and whom Janey should ask and when. All the while, Julia shrieked and Ally yelled downstairs that she wanted her red sweatshirt and couldn’t find it anywhere.

  Tracy’s head started to split with pain. The noise was becoming too much. The chatter was also too much. The growing list of chores that needed her attention was too much. The red sweatshirt was still dirty because she hadn’t washed it. Tracy felt like that symbolized her entire life at this point; she couldn’t even manage to wash the sweatshirt. The one her daughter had specifically asked to wear to school on Spirit Day. Which was today.

  On and on, Julia banged.

  Tears started to fill Tracy’s eyes, and she turned away.

  “Mom! Where is it?” Ally yelled again.

  “Mom? Did you hear me?” Kylie called, “I need fifteen dollars for the social studies projects supplies. Hey, why is Dad still home?”

  And just like that, all of it stopped for Tracy. Dad.

  She slid against the wall in the pantry where Kylie couldn’t see her. Dad. Dad would be gone. It would be just her. For how long? She didn’t know. She didn’t freaking know. How could she do this alone? She never had to before.

  Fifteen dollars meant nothing in the past. She never thought twice about it. She simply grabbed the cash and handed it to her daughters, or donated more to cover the costs for students who could not afford “just” fifteen dollars… or five, or ten dollars. But what about the thousands they spent a year? Where was that coming from now? Not from her. Certainly.

  The house. He said the house was in danger. He said—

  If only he was going to be here too. She nearly knelt down on the floor as the weight of what was to come suddenly became overbearingly heavy. She could not do this alone. She could face total financial ruin, but only if she had Micah to lean on. To help her. And tell her what to do. She wasn’t as smart as he was. She didn’t really know what to do about any of it. She dealt with all the kids’ needs and tried to meet all their demands. She cleaned the house, and kept them well stocked in sundries and comestibles. She dutifully ran errands and showed up to cheer for Kylie at soccer, and for Ally with her fast pitch. She was the team mother. The snack provider. The ever dependable ride for kids whose parents had to work.

  She was not a breadwinner, or a moneymaker, and couldn’t imagine working as a single-mother. She didn’t have it in her.

  Ordinary. She was and always had been ordinary. She knew that. She reveled in it. Gretchen needed success and liked to be revered as the crazy-smart one in any room. Vickie was the polar opposite; a needy, useless, beauty who had to be taken care of. Tracy was… the normal one. Average, totally competent, functioning adult, and mother of two. Wife of Micah. She only began taking some bookkeeping classes last year in preparation for Kylie starting middle school. It wasn’t much, just a two-year program in bookkeeping that would give her a certificate of completion. She was only working at it part-time. She didn’t even take school seriously.

  She was entirely unimpressive.

  How was she supposed to take over Micah’s responsibilities too? He was impressive. Intelligent, commanding and smart. He filed their taxes, and controlled their finances and chose their investments. She couldn’t even reconcile their checkbook. It wasn’t because she was an idiot or anything. She and Micah just split up the household management and made it a mutual assignment shared by the two of them. She did some things and he did others. He didn’t touch or interfere with any of the things she did, and vice versa. Since Micah’s profession was in finance, it just made sense for him to handle theirs. They both had plenty of things to do, and until now, there was no reason for either to doubt what the other was doing. She didn’t even know for sure how much money they had at any given point. She quickly saw how short-sighted she had been and how vulnerable. If Micah died, she would have been utterly lost. She should have prepared for taking things over if it ever became necessary.

  She never expected prison to be the reason she was suddenly left stranded in the world.

  “Mom!” Tracy jumped when Ally’s voice cut through her near panic attack. “Can’t you shut Julia up?” Ally was walking into the kitchen.

  Tracy wiped at her eyes and took in a deep breath while shoving back her shoulders. Yes, she could quiet and comfort and soothe a baby. She was always a little extraordinary at that.

  ****

  ~Vickie~

  She woke up grabbing her head at the pounding, drugged out sensation. She tried to swallow the dry sensation of powdered cement that filled her mouth and groaned as she pried her eyes open. She rolled over. Donny wasn’t there. She shut her eyes again: she was very hung over.

  What did she do?

  She couldn’t remember. All she remembered was being with her friend, Alana. They had several drinks with lunch. No big deal. Alana had called and wanted to go out that night. No. No, she couldn’t. She didn’t do that anymore. She was a mom. Donny’s wife. She didn’t go out and party on random weeknights anymore.

  No matter how much she wanted to.

  Alana heaved a long, disappointed sigh. Vickie begged Alana to meet her for lunch instead. She needed something to do. Donny expected her to be there at home, alone, all day, doing what? Nothing. She could only change so many diapers and make so many meals for Julia. The thought of going out with one of her old friends was something she eagerly pounced on. Yes! Out!

  Julia was fussy and cranky at lunch. Vickie remembered that. She would have dropped Julia off with her in-laws, but they recently embarked on a three-month cruise to celebrate their other son, Tony’s, emancipation from them. Tony got injured in the war and had pretty much remained huddled in their basement for years. Now, however, he had mov
ed across the country with Vickie’s sister, Gretchen. Well, Donny’s parents soon decided they deserved a vacation for all the times when they couldn’t. It was a little annoying to learn that even the angry war veteran was becoming successful now. Vickie had liked Tony at first, simply because he made her own lifestyle look good. At least, she didn’t live at home in her parents’ basement.

  However, her parents were footing her rent, but she didn’t tell anyone. She would have taken Julia to her own mother, but her mom gently tried to admonish Vickie recently that she was dropping Julia off there, or leaving her with Tracy, way too much.

  As if she didn’t ever deserve a break.

  So she took Julia to lunch with her. Julia just fussed and cried, interrupting their conversation and trying to get out of her highchair while hurling her food around. Alana all but bared her teeth at Julia in anger. Alana wanted to party, not babysit.

  The trapped feeling began to percolate in Vickie’s guts. That feeling sometimes overtook her. God, Julia was so much work. She needed everything and she was always there. Every day. All day. There was no break from her or relief. It was like nothing Vickie had ever experienced. She loved her. She really did. But she got very tired of her. The crying and the constant demands for something: a bath, a diaper change, a meal, a toy, a nap, a hug… the list was endless.

  And Donny got to escape from it all by going to work. It wasn’t fair.

  So what if she drank a little wine? Too much maybe. Alana drove them home. Happily, Julia fell asleep. Vickie remembered putting Julia in the play pen. Didn’t she? Yes. Yes, she did. And Alana came in. They really started gossiping then, and maybe drinking a little more.

  Vickie suddenly sat up and sprinted from the bedroom to swing open Julia’s bedroom door. It was empty. She slouched in defeat. Donny must have taken her. Where? Was she okay? She must have been. Wouldn’t Donny have awoken her?

  Tracy. He always took her to Tracy when he felt she wasn’t doing a good enough job at taking care of Julia. He was impossible to please. She tried. She really did. But she just wasn’t naturally good at it. She grabbed the phone and called her sister.