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The Crash Zone (The Zone Series Book 2)

Page 19

by Tarrah Anders


  I can feel Max’s presence behind me and as I turn around, I’m face to face with him.

  “Something just happened.” He states as he puts his hands on my shoulders and stares down into my eyes. “Talk to me?”

  “It’s nothing.” I reply, lowering my eyes.

  “Bull. I’ve come to know your body language quite well, and I know there’s more to nothing that’s bothering you. Come on, rule number… three?”

  I sigh. “I hate these rules sometimes.”

  He smiles and wraps me up in his arms. Then we turn and walk back to the living room and sit on the couch. He turns his body to me, grasps my hand and smiles.

  “It’s stupid, it’s an insecure thought. I don’t want to say it out loud.” I stall.

  “Then if it’s stupid, we’ll laugh about it. C’mon out with it woman.”

  “Okay, well a part of me is scared. You got bored, so you bought a motorcycle and now you want to get rid of it. What’s to say that you won’t get bored of me and the baby and go find another girlfriend who doesn’t have baggage?” I don’t even recognize my voice and I avoid all eye contact with him right now, afraid of what I will see in his expression.

  He breathes evenly, closes his eyes and then re-opens them to focus solely on my face.

  “Tatum, there is no chance in hell that I need to find another girlfriend. I got the motorcycle in a time when I needed to feel something. I was empty, lost and needed to quench the thirst. Since you’ve come into my life, I’ve been full, found and well… I’m thirsty for a different substance. You aren’t and will never be considered as baggage, neither will our daughter. I don’t want anyone else but you and peanut.”

  His hands squeeze mine and I blink back the tears that are fighting with me to erupt.

  “Wasn’t I just an impulse though?” I ask, knowing how immature I sound.

  “You are a desire, a desire that I love. A desire that continues with each and every day and grows stronger just as that baby inside of you grows.” His eyes have not wavered from mine.

  “Okay.”

  “Okay? Are you sure? I can do some more persuading you if you would like, you know in other ways?” He winks.

  “Are you sure you’re not into malesiophilia?” I tease.

  “Come again?” He coughed.

  “You know, into pregnant chicks. One of those weird fetishes that some people are into.” I further tease him.

  Max gets that gleam in his eye when he gets playful and he practically pounces on me. He nuzzles into my neck and as he leaves bites along my neck.

  “Is there a fetish name for this?” He asks running his hand down my thigh.

  “Yeah, it’s called being male.” I snicker as Max’s fingers turn from caressing and sexual to tickling and playful.

  Chapter 34 – Max

  We had a conversation regarding Tatum’s insecurities of our relationship last night and since then; I haven’t gotten it out of my head. It’s tortured me all morning, and I honestly hope that I can further prove to her that I’m in this for the long haul, how much I’ve changed, and how much she means to me.

  I want her to be completely secure in our relationship and I don’t want her to be afraid to come to me with those types of things. I can understand as I think back to our conversation where those thoughts came from, but when I told her my thoughts on it, I couldn’t have been more serious. The fact that I didn’t run to the bar when she told me I was going to be a father, or when I first started falling in love with her was my first indication of change. It also made me feel like I wasn’t a good alcoholic since I didn’t feel that urge, but I pushed that feeling away quickly. I made a mental note to bring that up to Leo or my sponsor later this afternoon when we meet for lunch.

  My office intercom goes off and Talia, the front desk receptionist’s voice fills the silence.

  “Max, you’ve got a Ms. Mitchell here to speak with you, she doesn’t seem to be on your schedule.”

  “Ms. Mitchell doesn’t need to schedule to see me, I’ll come right down. Talia?”

  “Yes?”

  “Is she okay?”

  “Yes sir.”

  Relief hits me as I practically run out of the office and to the elevator. The minute ride down the elevator seems to be a lifetime, however as the doors open, I see Tatum smiling and talking to Talia. She doesn’t notice the ping of the elevator and I easily sneak up and wrap my arms around her mid-section, making sure I give her belly an extra caress. I kiss her through her hair and I smell her fresh pineapple scent.

  Talia’s eyebrows quirk up and then a knowing look appears on her face.

  “What do I owe the pleasure?” I ask as she turns in my arms, her baby bump pushing me away a bit.

  “I was bored, and was hoping that we could discuss cars, I know nothing about them and you’re a guy.” She smiles.

  Talia snickers behind her and I peer over Tatum’s shoulder.

  “I like her Max!” Talia smiles.

  “So do I.” I say kissing her nose. I start to steer Tatum to the elevator, however she stops and turns to Talia.

  “Thank you Talia. I hope to see you soon.” She waves.

  It’s then that I’m assuming that Talia notices the baby bump as her eyes practically bulge out of her face as we go to the elevator doors. I place my hand on her belly and smile to Talia with a nod of my head. Yeah, I put that there! My pride swells.

  “So, maybe we can research for now, and then we can plan to visit some dealers later. I’ve got a lunch with Leo and Mike, so we’d have to wait until after.” I explain as I lead her out the elevator doors and into the hallway.

  We pass Dane’s office, which Tatum waves to him as we pass.

  “That’s fine, I don’t want to take up your day. I just thought more about… last night and I think I would feel safer if I got rid of rust bucket and got something completely safe.” She sighs as I lead her to sit in my chair behind the desk. I pull up one of the chairs from the front of my desk and place it beside her.

  “No, you should come to lunch with us in fact. Mike’s been wanting to meet you.” I say as she nods hesitantly.

  I click on the computer mouse and pull up a few saved web pages of dealerships.

  “You have car dealers saved on your computer?” She asks skeptically.

  “I was looking at these this morning when I was waiting for an email from one of our clients. Is there are particular car that you want?”

  “I want something boxy, not a mini-van but not a sedan or a coupe either.” She smiles.

  “Have you done research already?” I tease.

  “No, but those look easier to park and roomy.”

  “Okay, so there are the hamster cars and then there are the toaster cars.” I explain as I pull up their websites. “They’re relatively the same size, the Scion one is the toaster and it’s roomier. Both cars are also not too expensive.”

  “The hamster cars look too small, I think I like the toaster. What about a RAV?” She asks.

  “Those are good vehicles, more on the SUV side.”

  “I like those. Can we build one, that’s my favorite part of these websites?” She looks like a child excited for Santa.

  She begins building her car and by the end of it, she’s fully satisfied and sighs.

  “My perfect car.” She leans back.

  “I would agree, except the color. You don’t want red, that color of car probably gets pulled over more than other colors.”

  “But I like red, plus when peanut is older she might think it’s a fire truck.”

  “Except it’s clearly not.” I deadpan.

  We go back and forth joking and building different cars and enjoying each other’s company for a few hours, when I notice that it’s time to meet the guys for lunch.

  Tatum and I walk hand in hand to the parking lot, we stop in front of my black Audi, and I open her door for her. I quickly round the car and am sliding into my seat within a minute and start the engine.

&
nbsp; “We’re meeting at a sushi place, but they have a regular menu too.” He says as we pulled up.

  “I’m nervous.” She admits.

  “Don’t be. I’ll be with you and you already know Leo, just think of Mike as my friend not someone who looks out for my general well being.” I try to assure her. She smiles and nods and I place my hand on the small of her back to lead her to the doors.

  We approach Mike and Leo, with both of them standing once they see Tatum with me. Leo is first to greet her, he gives her a hug, says something in her ear and then releases her with a smile. She seems to have melted off the remainder of her anxiety, for which I mouth thank you to Leo as we shake hands. Mike is assessing Tatum quietly, pretending to be judging her. Then a large smile forms on his bushy face and he holds his arms out to her.

  “Ms., Tatum. Max here has told me a lot about you, I’ve been begging him to bring you to one of our hang outs. To what do I owe this pleasure?” You can hardly see his smile through his beard, but I can tell by his tone he’s overly excited about this change up to our normal routine.

  “I was at his office and he tied me up, put me in the trunk and here we are.” She quipped.

  Mike belly laughs loudly as Leo and I show our appreciative smiles.

  “I know you wanted to meet her, I want you to meet her, plus this is my circle here, and I want her to feel included.” This would be my first mention of my circle to her, she’s always been an honorary member, but I think the presentation of what the circle means to me will help with our conversation last night.

  “You realize that you may need to call in for the rest of the day, right? And that I’ll only be talking to the pretty lady?” Mike jokes.

  Tatum is quiet witnessing the back and forth with a smile as the waitress comes and takes our orders.

  “What’s the circle? Is it like in Meet the Parents and the circle of trust or is it Lion King and the circle of life?” She asks.

  “Trust. When I sponsor, I start from the ground up and we build a relationship from scratch, which involves into different aspects, we’re family, we’re one in the same, both recovering alcoholics and truth is something that always happens at our tables.”

  “So kind of like rule number three?” She turns to me.

  “Exactly.” I answer.

  “Rule number three?” Leo and Mike ask in unison.

  “We have house rules we started when we first moved in together, and then we re-did once we became more to another.” She answers.

  “So what’s rule number three?” Mike asks me.

  “Always be honest.” Tatum and I say in unison. I turn to her and smile.

  “I like it, I like you guys. She’s prettier to look at too.” Mike jokes with a wink at Tatum. “So, how goes it?”

  I turn to Tatum. “So, when we get together, we talk, we talk like chicks do about feelings, about what’s happening in our lives, and all that jam. There’s no judgments at our tables or in our circle, we feed off of another for experience and insight.” She nods.

  “That’s sounds better than a book club.” She smiles.

  “Alright, with that being said, I’m just going to jump into it. Tatum and I had a conversation last night. She expressed her thoughts and I explained my thoughts-.”

  “They are my insecurities, about us and our relationship.” Tatum interrupts.

  “Insecurities of what nature?” Mike asks with his elbows on the table.

  “I was, I am still partially afraid that he will get bored with me and leave me high and dry for a hotter girl, someone without a baby crying all times of the night.” Her emotions are fighting hard with her, I place my hand on her back and rub.

  “I see.” Mike nods and turns to me. “And Max, how did this part of the conversation go?”

  “Well, the whole conversation stemmed from saying that I got my bike when I was bored and that I was planning to trade it in or something since it’s not something practical for a new father. So from that her insecurities built. I tried to squash it giving the reasons I bought the bike which were superficial and explained to her there’s basically no chance in hell that I want someone else.” I explain. “If I didn’t want to be with her, I plainly wouldn’t be.”

  “How did you feel expressing those thoughts to her?” Mike asks me.

  “I had no problems saying any of that to her, because it’s the truth. Though when I was thinking this morning, and this has nothing to do with Tate or the baby. But generally being told that you’re going to be a dad for someone like me, a womanizing alcoholic- you would think that I would run back to the bar or something, but I didn’t. I didn’t even have that impulse. So then that feeling, that there was no desire for a sip of alcohol made me feel like I wasn’t a good alcoholic.” I explain, my hand still rubbing her back.

  “How did you feel once Tatum told you? I know we talked about this, but I think that it’s good for her to hear too.” Mike explained.

  “Well, at first I was scared as shit. But then it dissolved into pride, and then a desire and now love.” I say.

  “How did you feel when Tatum said that you’re going to be a dad, what was your first thought?” Mike retorts.

  “That he needed a strawberry milkshake.” Tatum answers for me. “As soon as I told him, he excused himself and started making one, he made me one too. It calmed him, and then he was cool with everything. He didn’t have the reaction I was thinking he would.”

  “When you first told me about you becoming a father, I saw no hesitance in you. You were eager to be your best and you vibrated with some energy. It’s the same energy that you have when you speak about Tatum.” Mike says. “There’s no handbook on being an alcoholic, there’s nothing that tells you that you need to act or feel a certain way. For some, the need for the taste is so strong on a daily basis, for others it’s a thought in the back of their head.” Mike continued.

  “This is like a therapy session!” Tatum exclaims. “Is it always like this?”

  “Only when there’s something going on, some weeks we just talk about sports!”Leo laughs.

  “Is Mike your sponsor too?” Tatum asked Leo.

  “Yeah, we all sat together during a meeting and hit it off. So we are okay with sharing.” Leo smiles elbowing Mike.

  “If you don’t mine me asking, Mike how long have you been sober?” She asks propping her chin on her hand.

  “15 years this year.” He puffs out his chest.

  “Wow, that’s great. Do you have any kids, wife?” She continues.

  “Both. My daughter is 19 and my son is 16. My wife is eternally 25 though!” He laughs.

  “My grandma always told me she was 35, I think up until I was a teen I had actually believed her.” Tatum laughs.

  The remainder of our extended lunch went great. Tatum hugged both Leo and Mike with the promises of having everyone over for dinner as we left.

  “Thank you.” She whispers as she leans into me walking to the car.

  “For what?” I ask.

  “For letting me into your circle of trust.” She answers.

  I stop us walking and turn her body into mine; I put my arms around her and look her in the eyes.

  “You’ve always been in it, since day one.”

  She smiles as she leans up for a kiss. I may have groped her right there on the street while returning that kiss.

  Chapter 35 – Tatum

  My entire body is vibrating in anticipation as I start the oven and set the timer for dinner tonight. My parents and Max’s parents will be here any moment and I feel like I’m sweating like a horse. I’ve changed my dress for the third time in a row in the duration that Max has been in the shower. I hear the shower shut off and I run into the bedroom.

  “I can’t do this. I just can’t do this. Let’s cancel.” I pace the bedroom.

  He steps into the walk in closet with his towel around his waist, looking delicious.

  “Not a chance babe. As soon as I called my mom, I had to stop her from coming
over that moment, there’s nothing keeping her away from this house tonight. She’s given us a lot of space, but once we open that can of worms, it’s going to be hard to keep her away.” He smiles as he slips on some boxers. My eyes are fixed on his package as I feel warmth spreading. I know that I licked my lips because I can see the blaze of heat in Max’s eyes.

  “Can we just….” I started yet was halted by the doorbell. “Damnit!” I stand, look at Max longingly and leave the room practically stomping all the way to the door.

  “Trisket!” My father bellows as I answer the door.

  “Hey daddy, come in.” I move to the side, so my parents can enter.

  “Baby, you look gorgeous. I’m so excited to meet this fella. Why has it taken so long?” My mother asks as she hustles past me as she kisses the air in my direction.

  “Well, for one you guys live in the middle of nowhere, and rarely visit. And two, life has been busy.” I answer.

  “Poppycock!” My father says.

  My parents are opposites. They’re opposites of each other and I’m completely opposite of them. I have grown up with the idea that I was adopted and they just never told me. I don’t look like either of them and our personalities are so far off, that if we were together in public, we would look like strangers standing next to each other. We get along fair enough, sometimes my mother is distant and seems like her only interest is herself, whereas my father is quirky and doting so far. My mother has preferred to not acknowledge my pregnancy, which is fine by me.

  My father is short and round, with balding brown hair and a pornstache. While my mother looks like Olive from Popeye and screams gaudy by her fake pretentious tone and the overuse of her hands while talking. They claim that my genes stem from my father’s side since he has a slight tan and has some Italian heritage, since my mother is pale as a ghost. I love my parents, but they’re a little much to deal with in large doses, sometimes small doses as well.

  “I apologize for taking so long to get ready. I got off work late. I’m Max, and welcome to our home.” Max says as he strolls into the room, with his hand stretched to shake hands with my dad. My mother turns and gapes at him. He acts like he doesn’t notice my mother drooling on our floors and shakes her hand as well. My mother hasn’t uttered a word and for that I’m shocked, nor has she closed her mouth.

 

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