First

by Penelope Sky

My body went rigid when I heard the question.

  A deep voice sounded over the phone, easily recognizable because I’d heard it every day for a decade. “I’ve got him.”

  Heath hung up the phone and stared at his brother for a long time, his rage flashing with just a simple look. He shoved the phone into his pocket then crossed his arms over his chest. “You don’t belong here, Balto.”

  “I know.” He stared at his twin with the same intensity. “But that was the last time.”

  Heath continued to stand there in their silent face-off before he stepped away. He motioned for his men to follow him, and they left the bar peacefully.

  I still breathed hard because so much shit had just happened. I got to my feet and stared at Balto’s massive back. My fingers ran through my hair, picking up all the sweat I’d just excreted. “Thank you…”

  He slowly turned around and faced me, and I could see my gratitude meant nothing to him. “We’re even, Damien. You’re on your own from now on.”

  I nodded in understanding.

  “Hades…how did that happen?”

  His blue eyes were so bright, they seemed fake. It was the softest feature he possessed, and they relayed his thoughts better than his words ever could. “I took your call and listened. It only took me a few seconds to figure out what was happening. The Skull Kings are still loyal to me, and after a quick phone call, I learned everything. But your father was being held on the opposite side of the city, and I couldn’t get there in time. So I called Hades.”

  “And he agreed?” Just that afternoon, he said he wished I were dead.

  “Instantly.”

  I couldn’t believe what he’d just said.

  “It worked out better that way, because Heath wouldn’t hesitate to kill Hades if he showed his face. But me…he wouldn’t touch me. I’m bulletproof, and not because of my size.”

  But because of his blood. “I’m really glad I saved your life.” I was still in a daze, unable to believe what had just gone down.

  His eyes drilled into mine. “I’m gonna give you some advice. Take it. Because I won’t be there next time. You could call me and beg, and I’ll hang up on you.”

  I nodded.

  “Give Heath what he wants. Because that wasn’t a bluff. He would have killed your father.”

  I wanted revenge for what he did to my father. He could have given him a heart attack. But I was also scared shitless in that moment, so revenge wasn’t my number one choice. “Yeah.”

  He turned to walk away. “Your father is being held on the top level of the Saint Apartments. Hades will wait with him until you arrive.” He walked out first, and like a small militia, the rest of his men followed.

  I entered the empty room with the floor-to-ceiling windows and found my father sitting in a wooden chair, visibly unharmed and wearing his favorite blue sweater because he was always cold—even in summer.

  A dead body was on the floor, a puddle of dark blood soaking into the carpet. The man’s gun lay beside him with his outstretched hand reaching for it. Hades stood near the large windows and looked out across the dark city, his back turned to us.

  The only person I cared about in that moment was my father.

  Old, frail, defenseless.

  Seeing him made me want to kill Heath, to torture him for what he’d done to this elderly man. “Father…” I ran to him and kneeled down so I could hug him, wrap my arms around him and hold him close. I never appreciated my father until I almost lost him, realized I hadn’t spent as much time with him as I could, wasn’t as good of a son as I could be. I recognized the cologne he’d been wearing for twenty years, seriously outdated and a little musky. He never changed his wardrobe, so the sweater was just as old.

  He patted me on the back. “I’m okay, Damien. I wasn’t even worried. I knew you would save me.”

  But I didn’t.

  “Hades took care of business like he always does.” He gripped my shoulder and gave me a slight smile, his puffy cheeks full of wrinkles. “You always have each other’s backs. That’s hard to find in times like these.”

  “Yeah…” I swallowed the lump in my throat.

  He patted my cheek. “Damien, it’s alright. You can calm down.”

  “I’m so sorry, Father… I’m sorry this happened to you.”

  “Nothing happened, son. It’s a risk that comes with the business. But you handled it beautifully.” He patted my cheek again before he rose to his feet. “Let me piss, and then we’ll go. All the action excited my bladder.” He shuffled his feet and moved slowly until he turned the corner and entered the hallway.

  I rose to my feet and stared at the powerful man in the suit. His hands rested in the pockets of his slacks, his watch noticeable on his wrist. He must have been meeting a client on this side of town to be dressed like that. His stoic countenance reflected in the glass as he looked at the lit city.

  I came up behind him, at a loss for words. I stared at him for a long time because my mouth couldn’t articulate all the thoughts swirling in my head. “Hades…I don’t know where to begin.” I’d betrayed him and pushed him away…but he was still there.

  He slowly turned around and faced me, his eyes hard and his expression cold. His brown eyes looked me over, noticing the puffiness around my eyes and the tears that were still fresh.

  “Thank you.” My voice choked as I said the words, but I didn’t feel shame. “I don’t know how to thank you for what you did…”

  He pulled his right hand out of his pocket and placed it on my shoulder. “You just did.”

  All the emotion I’d been holding in for the last year rose straight to my throat, making me feel vulnerable, like a completely different person. I felt the surface of my eyes moisten with tears I refused to shed, but it was getting harder and harder to fight.

  “You would have done it for me,” he whispered.

  All I could do was nod, feeling the tremors all over my body. “I’m so sorry about everything… I miss you.” It was the lamest thing I’d ever said, words that should never come out of a man’s mouth, but I was more emotional than I’d ever been, and shit was just pouring out.

  His eyes softened before he wrapped his arms around me and embraced me. “I miss you too.”

  My arms grabbed on to him, and I clutched him hard, my hands fisting the material of his suit like I was using it to climb a mountain. My chin moved to his shoulder, and I inhaled a deep breath, feeling the tears escape from my eyes. I could see my pitiful reflection in the glass, and I closed my eyes so I wouldn’t have to face my weakness.

  He cupped the back of my head, and his breathing increased slightly, like he felt the same emotion too.

  I didn’t want to let go, wanted to hold him as long as I could. I’d been lost without him, depressed like I’d lost my mother again. He was my family…he was everything. My pain had turned to hatred so it would be easier to handle, but I always knew how I really felt—that I missed him so damn much.

  After a few minutes, he pulled away and looked me in the eye, his eyes not wet but filled with emotion. “I’m sorry too.” He kept one hand on the back of my neck, his other hand gripping my shoulder.

  I wasn’t embarrassed that he could see my tears because I wasn’t looking at a stranger. I was looking at my best friend, the one person I could be completely myself with, the man I would take a bullet for in a heartbeat. “I love you, man.”

  He nodded. “I love you too.” He squeezed my shoulder before he released me.

  My father stepped back into the room. “You can make out with your girlfriend later, Damien. I’m hungry.”

  Hades glanced at my father and chuckled.

  I chuckled too then let him go, quickly wiping away my tears on my jacket. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

  He nodded, still smiling. “Tomorrow. And every day after that.”

  I got my father inside and made him a sandwich. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay with me?” I placed the plate in front of him at the small ro
und table where he sat.

  “I’m not gonna let those thugs scare me out of my own home.” He grabbed it with both hands and took a bite.

  I stood behind the chair across from him. “Maybe it’s time you move in with me anyway. You know I have a big place—”

  “No.” He took another bite. “I can take care of myself.”

  “Never said you couldn’t. I just think—”

  “I said no,” he snapped. “I don’t need your charity.”

  “It’s not charity, Dad. I just think you’d be safer—”

  “I’d rather die.”

  Fucking drama queen.

  “I’m perfectly fine where I am. I’m not going to burden my thirty-year-old son and chase all his dates away.”

  I didn’t roll my eyes in front of him because I’d get slapped. “That’s not what would happen. Like I said, it’s a big place—”

  “The answer is no.”

  I sighed in defeat. I knew my father was starting to slow down, and after this happened, it made sense for him to live with me. Patricia could help him with whatever he needed, and he would be safe in the house since he never went anywhere anyway. “Alright.”

  He finished his sandwich, leaving his mess behind. “I’m tired, so I’m gonna go to bed.” He got to his feet and patted me on the cheek as he walked by. “I’ll see you later, son. You have a key, right?”

  I nodded. “Goodnight, Father.” I didn’t know how he brushed off tonight like it was no big deal, and that made me wonder if he was entirely mentally astute. I turned off the lights then locked the door behind me before I walked to my car.

  Then I sat there, finally having a moment to myself to process what the fuck had just happened. I rested my head against the window and let out the breath I’d been holding for the last minute.

  I couldn’t believe Heath went there…

  After an innocent old man.

  What would I have done if Hades hadn’t saved my ass?

  What if it was someone else? Like my sister? Or…

  I couldn’t even bring myself to think about her.

  Annabella.

  I sucked in a breath between my teeth, feeling so much pain at the idea of her being tied to a chair with a gun pointed at her head. Heath probably would have picked her if he’d known about her. We’d been seeing each other in private so Liam wouldn’t figure out who she was sleeping with. If that hadn’t been the case…it could have been her.

  And I would have died.

  It made me realize how much I cared about her, that she wasn’t just some hot piece of ass.

  Now I understood why Hades stepped away from the business, because Sofia and his kids would always be at risk. They were easy targets to him, and he would be a terrible husband and father if he didn’t put them first.

  Made me realize I had to make the same decision—my job or Annabella.

  22

  Annabella

  I worked at my desk but glanced at my phone a couple times…hoping to see a message from my man.

  That’s what he was to me, so I would call him as such.

  I didn’t hear from him yesterday, and since I was trying not to be too forward about my feelings for him, I did my best to keep my distance, not to smother him with obsession. If I had it my way, I’d be at his place every night.

  I hated my mattress, and not because it was old and lumpy, but because he wasn’t there beside me. I was addicted to his presence, sleeping hard whenever that strong man was beside me. I liked staring at his face as I fell asleep, seeing it again first thing in the morning.

  I was so into that man…and he must know.

  How could he not? I woke him up several times during the night because I needed more. I grabbed his arm on the drive because I wanted him to know how I felt. I wore my heart on my sleeve, showed him how much I wanted him, so there would be no mistaking my feelings. If I didn’t give him everything I had, someone else would…and I would lose him.

  I couldn’t lose that man. He was my goddamn religion.

  Sofia came into my office. “I have good news.”

  “The board agreed to the remodel?”

  “No.” She sat on the corner of the desk. “Better than that.”

  “We’re gonna have fresh cookies in the lobby again?”

  She chuckled. “Okay, not that good. Hades and Damien made up last night.”

  “Really?” I felt so much happiness because I knew Damien wanted that so badly. “What happened?”

  She hesitated before she answered. “Something happened with work, and Hades was there for him…so they buried the hatchet and moved on. I can see how much happier Hades is for it. He’s in a much better place.”

  “That’s great. I knew how important that was to Damien. He must be so thrilled.”

  “Yeah,” she said with a nod. “And my husband said you had something to do with his decision.”

  “Me?” I asked in surprise.

  “When you told him what Damien had confided to you, I guess it made him realize Damien was still sorry…after all this time.”

  I was gonna get some good loving for this. “I’m glad I could help. Now the four of us can go out together.”

  “Yes, that’ll be fun,” she said. “I’m just excited to be in the same room with both of them. Every time I see Damien, I feel like I’m having an affair.” She hopped off the desk and chuckled. “I’ll let you get back to work. Just wanted to share the good news.”

  When I got home, I called him.

  He answered, but his voice was low like he was trying to speak quietly. “Hey.”

  “Hey,” I said, bursting with happiness. “Sofia told me that you and Hades made up. That’s so great. I’m very happy for you.”

  He didn’t reflect my happiness, his mood clearly troubled. “Yeah…”

  I turned quiet, trying to figure out what I was missing. “Everything okay?”

  He took a long time to answer. “Are you home right now?”

  “Yeah. Why?”

  “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” He hung up.

  My stomach clenched with dread, like I knew something bad was about to happen. There was a warning in my gut, like he was coming by to share terrible news. But I reminded myself that his moods were unpredictable, and he probably just wanted to be comforted after having a hard day…just the way I wanted to see him after my dinner with Liam.

  That was all.

  He knocked even though the door was unlocked.

  “It’s open.” I sat on the couch, feeling more uneasy now that he hadn’t just walked in like he usually did.

  He stepped inside, wearing a long-sleeved maroon shirt that was nice over his muscles. His black jeans were low on his hips, and he wore one of his nice watches on his wrist. He shut the door behind him quietly then stared at me.

  Something was wrong. I could feel it.

  I got to my feet and walked up to him, my lips aching for his. Even though he wasn’t in the best mood, I rose on my tiptoes and kissed him anyway.

  He kissed me back—but it was cold.

  I leaned back and stared at him, feeling my heart start to pound with fear. This man had only been in my life for a few months, but he became an extension of me, a part of my soul. When I was confronted with the real possibility of losing him, it made me so fucking scared. “What’s wrong?”

  He continued to stare at me with those dreamy eyes, his jawline covered with a shadow of hair because he hadn’t shaved since the last time we’d woken up together. His hands slid into his pockets instead of wrapping around my waist. Then he looked down for a while…so he wouldn’t have to look at me altogether.

  This couldn’t be happening. “You better not be here to dump me, Damien.” I issued the statement but felt my sternum crack as I did it. I wanted him to deny my claim, assure me something else was on his mind.

  But he didn’t. He looked up again, his eyes shifting slightly as he looked at my features.

  “No…” I should have
kept that plea to myself to save some dignity, but it came out on its own. My heart ached for this man; my body burned for this man. I didn’t want to be with anyone else. I’d finally found a diamond in the rough…and I couldn’t let it go.

  “Annabella.” He didn’t act cowardly by avoiding my gaze. He knew he was breaking my heart, and he owned up to it. “It’s time for us to move on. We’ve had our fun, but it’s over.”

  I knew the words were coming, but that didn’t make them hurt less. I refused to cry, but I knew my eyes would shed a waterfall the second he walked out of my apartment. “Did I do something?”

  His voice was slightly wounded. “Not at all.”

  “Then why?”

  It took him a long time to find a response. “I tried monogamy, and it’s just not my thing. I’m sorry.”

  So, he wanted to be with other women… I wasn’t enough. Why wasn’t I ever enough for the men in my life? Liam hooked up with someone else when I lost our baby, and Damien wanted something new when I didn’t please him enough. It fucking hurt.

  He waited for me to say something.

  I crossed my arms over my chest and thought of arguments to make. I wanted to beg him to stay, wanted to cry until he changed his mind, guilt him into staying. But that wasn’t me, and I needed to have some pride. So, I said nothing…used my energy to keep my tears behind my eyes. “Alright…”

  He stared at me like he expected me to say something more.

  I wouldn’t allow myself to speak.

  He sighed when the silence lingered long enough. “You’ll find someone who deserves you…deserves you more than I do.”

  But I only want you.

  He stepped back toward the door. “I’ll let myself out.”

  Please don’t go.

  “Goodbye, Annabella.” He walked out.

  Come back. I watched him close the door then listened to his footsteps as he walked down the hallway.

  When I knew he was really gone, I cried.

  I cried harder than I ever had.