Teach Me Daddy: A Mountain Man’s Secret Baby Romance

by Hart, Rye

  “But what about what’s good for you?” Cassie asked. “It’s about time you started doing something for you.”

  “And I am ,” I said as I held out my arms. “Look at me. I’m in a dress for the first time in years, and I’m loving it.”

  “You are?” she asked.

  “Yes, you idiot, what the hell’s wrong with you?” I asked, giggling. “I couldn’t even look at another man after that night three years ago. You think it was because he hurt me, but it was really because he opened my eyes up to this world. This… this lifestyle of unimaginable beauty and pleasure and grace. No man compared, Cassie. None of them. And just look at Camillo. Look at how good he is with those boys.”

  I stepped aside and allowed Cassie a glimpse into what I was already becoming addicted to.

  “He is good with them,” she said, murmuring.

  “He’d be perfect for this role. This strong male influence that Kevin hasn’t had in so long. And Ana? She deserves her father.”

  “I just don’t want you getting your hopes up,” she said. “He just strode in out of nowhere. How do you know he’s not gonna just walk back out?”

  “There are a lot of unknowns, yes. But you let me deal with those, all right?”

  “Whatever you say, crazy town.”

  “You haven’t called me that in months,” I said as I stepped over to the fridge.

  “Because you haven’t done anything that warranted it until now.”

  I pulled out the lasagna I pieced together this morning and threw it into the preheated oven. I pulled out a long loaf of bread I’d gotten at the store and split it in half, coating it in butter and fresh garlic before I wrapped it in tin foil. Just as the cheese started to bubble on top of the lasagna, I threw the garlic bread into the oven. Then Cassie and I began setting the table.

  The boys trickled in soon after, with their noses tuned in to the smells wafting around our small little kitchen.

  “It smells good in here,” Junior said.

  “I hope you like lasagna,” I said. “I put it together this morning before work.”

  “Do you have the garlic bread, too?” Kevin asked.

  “Of course I’ve got garlic bread for the garlic monster,” I said, winking.

  “Garlic monster?” Camillo asked.

  “Kevin would probably eat raw garlic if I let him,” I said.

  As the boys sat down at the table, I could see Camillo out of the corner of my eye. He was settling Ana into her high chair, clipping her in while she grabbed onto the tendrils of his hair. Junior had dropped his guard just a bit, so I could see a little more of that childish side of him and something told me that Kevin had finally found a friend to play with.

  I knew Cassie was worried about me and she had every right to be. Camillo showed up in a snow-covered truck only twenty-four hours ago and now he was sitting down to family dinners like he’d been here for years. I really didn’t have any idea if he had any intentions of sticking around like he said. All I really had was my choice to believe him.

  And I allowed myself to sink deep into a fantasy I didn’t even realize I had.

  I wanted to know more about his nephew’s situation, but that wasn’t for me to pry into. If he wanted to bring it up and talk about it, I’d be there with an ear to listen. The mere fact that he had taken this boy in and was raising him as his own was a testament to how much he cared about family and it only served as more evidence in my mind to the fact that he meant what he said.

  That he wanted to stick around and get to know all of us better.

  I took out the leftover salad from last night and set it on the table. Cassie grabbed drinks for everyone while I backtracked for the salad dressings and, by that time, the oven timer was going off. I scrambled to the oven to take out the lasagna and garlic bread and my stomach began to rumble. Just as I turned around with the hot lasagna in my hands, I was met with the towering form of Camillo.

  My eyes ventured up toward his as his stern gaze settled on me. He slowly took the hot lasagna from my hands, taking a step back before he took it to the table. I released the breath I didn’t know I was holding while I reached back for the garlic bread, but his hand came down on top of mine.

  Oh, how I’d missed his touch.

  “I’ve got it,” he said.

  I looked up into his eyes and allowed myself to swim in their icy blue depth for a moment. He scanned me again, taking in my body in this dress while our heat radiated between one another. There was a part of me that wanted to raise up and kiss him. Just envelop his lips with mine to provoke him. I wanted him to pin me to this counter and take what he knew was his. I wanted that commanding presence from three years ago to rear its head and strip me of all my walls again.

  I wanted him to pull from my body what he’d given me three years ago.

  “Would it be all right if I fed Ana tonight?” he asked.

  “Yeah,” I said breathlessly. “That’s just fine.”

  The two of us walked back over to the table and sat down. Lasagna was being divvied out and the garlic bread was being sliced. Everyone was digging into the food and spooning more onto their plates and, all the while, Camillo was feeding Ana. He kept pulling apart the garlic bread and giving it to her to hold onto. Then, he took to chopping up some of the lasagna on his plate, once it had cooled, and was feeding it to her off his fork.

  I melted into my chair while I watched him take care of his daughter.

  The attention he was showering her with weakened my knees. The way he was completely focused on her, blowing on the food and tearing it into bite-sized pieces, it was almost enough to bring me to my knees. There was a pang of regret that washed over me. Could it have been this way from the moment Ana was born? If I’d just reached out to him and told him I was pregnant, could she have had this her entire life? Had I missed out on a partner that could’ve helped and supported us instead of me dragging our family through the mud and mire just to make ends meet?

  Did I rob her of something substantial that would forever affect the way she developed?

  “Rose, you okay?”

  I felt Cassie’s hand reach over and touch my knee, squeezing it lightly as I turned my gaze toward her. I could feel how hot my cheeks were as Camillo turned his head to me and, in an instant, the joyful gaze he held for Ana descended back into the stern one he always held for me.

  He was studying me. Trying to figure out what was wrong without alerting the boys to anything.

  “Yeah,” I said, nodding. “Just thinking.”

  “About what?” Camillo asked.

  “It’s just been a long day,” I said. “Work was rough. Customers are jerks. Same old thing.”

  I watched Camillo nod his head as he scanned my face one last time. Cassie’s hand was still resting on my knee and I reached underneath the table to grab it. The guilt was overwhelming, choking the very life out of me, even as my stomach rumbled with hunger. I tried to cast the questions out of my mind. I tried to tell myself to stop thinking like that. I had done what I thought was right. I stayed away from a man who told me he was dangerous and I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl I was determined to provide for. I sacrificed and scraped by, making sure Kevin and Ana could have everything they’d ever wanted.

  I did my best. I did what I thought was right. I had to stop thinking the way I was.

  If I didn’t, I was going to break down at the kitchen table, and the last thing these children needed to see was me sobbing.

  “So,” I said as I squeezed Cassie’s hand. “Is everyone ready for Christmas?”

  “Oh, yeah,” Kevin said. “Got my list ready and everything.”

  “Me, too,” Junior said.

  “What do you want for Christmas, Junior?” I asked.

  “A bookcase,” he said. “All my books are in boxes underneath my bed.”

  “Do you like to read?” I asked.

  “Yeah, do you?” Junior asked.

  “When I can,” I said. “What do you enjo
y reading?”

  “Poetry, mostly. Sometimes fantasy novels. You know, the really long ones.”

  “Poetry,” I said as my eyes flickered over to Camillo. “Do you have a favorite author?”

  “Right now, I’m reading Yeats.”

  “Yeats?” Kevin asked. “Who’s that?”

  I was suddenly pulled back into the past. Into the beautiful dungeon lair of my dark prince. I was handcuffed to the bed with Camillo’s body on top of mine, writhing into his chiseled chest while his body stuffed me to the brim. The lines of that tattered note I still kept in my bedside drawer raced through my mind as Junior talked at me, but all I could see were his moving lips.

  There was no sound. Only the feeling of those fluffy handcuffs against my wrists, with Camillo’s teeth sunken into my neck.

  “Could I read it sometime?” Kevin asked.

  “Sure, I could bring it over soon,” Junior said. “Would that be okay?”

  My hand was massaging my wrist as my gaze fluttered over to Junior.

  “What was that?” I asked.

  “Junior wants to bring his book of Yeats over for Kevin to read sometime,” Camillo said.

  I could feel his eyes on the motions around my wrists as I dropped my hands to my lap and swallowed deeply.

  “Junior, you’re welcome here whenever you want to come over. No matter the day of the week or what time it is. You’re always welcome here. Just like your Uncle.”

  “Awesome,” he said, smiling.

  “Thanks, sis,” Kevin said.

  My eyes gravitated back toward Camillo, who had ripped his gaze from me and was now paying attention to Ana. I looked back over to Cassie, her attention fully trained on me. For the second day in a row, I was no longer hungry for food and I could see the worry bubbling up behind Cassie’s beautiful, dark blue eyes as her hand slipped back onto my knee.

  I clenched it tightly, allowing all my emotions to pour into that one action, while my face kept a small grin for the comfort of the people around me.

  But deep down, I was scared. I was scared, angry, guilt-ridden, and sad. And I had no idea what to do about it.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN – CAMILLO

  Rose was overworked. That much, I could tell. Her mind was so exhausted, and her body was so downtrodden from her life that she was having a hard time keeping herself together. But when I saw her massaging her wrist, I had to suppress the burn rising in my gut.

  “When’s your next day off?” Cassie asked Rose.

  “Tomorrow, actually. It’ll be nice. My mind’s just so…”

  “Tired?” I asked.

  Rose’s gaze whipped over to me, giving me a chance to study her further. The slight way her shoulders slumped. The way her breathing was labored. The way the bags underneath her eyes hung just a little bit lower.

  She needed help. My beautiful songbird needed a break.

  “Why don’t I come over tomorrow and help out with Ana?” I asked.

  “Oh, she’s got daycare tomorrow,” she said. “And Kevin’ll be in school.”

  “Would it be possible for her to skip a day of daycare?” I asked.

  I saw Rose thinking about it while Cassie eyed me cautiously.

  “If he came over,” Cassie began. “It would give the two of you some time to talk, as well.”

  I could see the confusion behind Rose’s eyes at Cassie’s words.

  “Could I stay home from school, too?” Kevin asked.

  “Could I come over with Uncle Camillo tomorrow?” Junior asked.

  “You guys, let’s not throw all of this stuff at her at once,” I said.

  “Actually, that doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” Rose said.

  Everyone turned their gazes toward her and I drew in a deep breath through my nose.

  “Yes, I’ll keep Ana home from daycare tomorrow so you can spend time with her. Junior, if you want to come over and spend time with Kevin, I’ll call him out of school tomorrow. The two of you can play Minecraft all day and I’ll make us all some snacks we can eat.”

  “I can make the snacks,” I said.

  “You’ll be too busy entertaining your daughter,” she said, grinning. “I’ll make the snacks. You just make sure the two of you are back over here tomorrow.”

  “Only if you let me cook dinner,” I said.

  “Actually, I thought the guys, and I could do a pizza night with movies,” Cassie said.

  “What?” Rose asked.

  “Yeah. If Camillo’s gonna be here with Ana, she’s probably not gonna nap. That means she’ll be down early for bed, so the boys and I can have pizza and watch movies.”

  “Actually, I was thinking I could make dinner,” I said. “It’s been a long time since I had the ability to make a full family dinner.”

  “Camillo, you don’t—”

  “What was the promise I made to you, Rose?” he asked.

  Her eyes stared at me as I pulled Ana from her high chair.

  “We’ll come over tomorrow and I’ll cook dinner for us all that evening,” I said.

  I shot her a stern gaze, and immediately, she backed down.

  “All right,” she said, nodding. “I’m looking forward to it.”

  I convinced her to leave the food on the table while we all ventured into the living room to play charades. Junior and Kevin automatically paired up, which warmed my heart in ways I didn’t think were possible. I held my sweet, beautiful daughter in my arms while the boys challenged the girls and I couldn’t stop laughing as they bounced around and tried to win points for their team. By the time the game was winding down, Ana was getting fussy, and before I knew it, Rose was plucking her from my arms.

  I watched her turn her back and head toward the stairs and, immediately, I followed her to watch their routine.

  I wanted to know how my own daughter enjoyed being put down so I could do it tomorrow night.

  I walked behind them into her room and watched while Rose changed her into her pajamas. She wiped down Ana with some baby wipes, explaining to me that Ana preferred morning baths instead of evening ones. I took in every single detail of the encounter as I watched mother and daughter enjoy their routine.

  I never thought my heart could fill with the amount of joy I had, watching the mother of my child take care of our daughter.

  She put Ana down into her crib, but Ana’s whining got worse. Rose tried to shush her. I could see the frustration and exhaustion quickly creeping up her back as she bent over the crib, so I went over and planted my hands onto her hips.

  She gasped as I slowly moved her off to the side, her body obeying me as it always did.

  I looked down into the beautiful blue eyes of my angry little girl, and I planted my hand onto her stomach. I slowly began to massage her, chuckling lightly as burp after burp rose up from her throat.

  “I guess garlic doesn’t agree with everyone,” I said, grinning.

  Then, an idea crossed my mind.

  “ Ninna nanna, ninna oh. Questo bimbo a chi lo dò? Se lo dò alla Befana, se lo tiene una settimana. Se lo dò all'uomo nero, se lo tiene un anno intero. Ninna nanna, ninna oh, questo bimbo me lo terrò .”

  I sang the little Italian verse over and over again, like my mother did with me when I was angry at night. I could still hear her soothing voice in my ears while Ana’s cries slowly lessened. Over and over again, I sang the lyrics to her while memories of my own mother flooded to the forefront of my mind.

  I missed her every single day I woke up.

  After the third time of singing it, my beautiful little daughter was asleep. Rose was staring at the interaction, her eyes wide with questions.

  I rose up and looked over at her, watching as she peeked over into our daughter’s crib. I could see the delight behind her eyes at the fact that Ana was asleep and the relief that flooded all the way down to her toes.

  She had been easy to read that first night and it was wonderful that she was still so easy to interpret now.

  “What was that?” she ask
ed.

  “A lullaby my mother used to sing to me back in Italy,” I said.

  “What does it mean?”

  “It’s about how a mother talks about keeping her child for herself because she knows no one else will take better care of her child than herself,” I said.

  “Could you… teach it to me?”

  The sparkle in her eye returned. The curious gaze that soaked my soul returned, blasting me with memories of the past. Memories of the way her eyes took in all my little toys. Memories of the way she dangled so wondrously from that chain in the ceiling. Memories of things I’d wanted to do to her. Paddles I wanted to redden her skin with and marks I wanted to make. Nipple clamps I wanted to tease her with and massages with hot oils that would’ve made her squirm.

  “I can,” I said.

  She led me out of Ana’s room as I turned out the light. I closed the door behind me, and we stood in the hallway, listening to Cassie play downstairs with the boys.

  I already had a plan formulating in my mind of how I could get her alone tomorrow night.

  “How did you find yourself raising your nephew?” she asked.

  I felt my entire demeanor darken as images of the blood and carnage pushed away the beautiful thoughts of her body.

  “My brother and his wife died,” I said. “I am his godfather, so when his parents died, I took him in. I decided that boy had experienced enough for one lifetime, so I liquidated everything and moved us here to start fresh.”

  “So, they’re true? The rumors about you?”

  I looked down at her as her wild eyes stared back up at me.

  “Yes,” I said. “They are.”

  “I’m so sorry about your family,” she said.

  “And I’m sorry for yours.”

  “Can I be honest with you?” she asked.

  “I hope you’re nothing but, my songbird.”

  I heard her gasp lightly at the name as I turned my body fully toward her.

  “What do you wish to say?” I asked.

  “I’m worried,” she said. “About your ties to the mob. Are we…? Is Ana…?”