Walking Back to Happiness

by June Francis

  ‘It’s not just one-sided. Jerry is good for Joseph. I’d say that brothers and sisters are inclined to want to find their own friends. Perhaps it’s a case of familiarity breeding contempt sometimes. They think they know each other inside out but they don’t know everything.’

  ‘I’d never have believed our Peggy would have had the guts to leave home without saying where she was going, but she did. As for my other sister, Lil, I’ve never forgotten her saying that I think I can charm my way out of anything.’

  ‘And can you?’ Lucia smiled lopsidedly.

  ‘No, or I wouldn’t have landed in jail. I needed pulling up and to think about not only who I was hurting by my actions. Not only was I damaging other people, but that I was also damaging myself.’

  ‘But now you’ve the chance to start over again and make something of your life,’ said Lucia, draining her coffee cup and getting to her feet.

  ‘Yeah, and I don’t want to make a mess of things this time.’

  ‘You and Maggie?’

  ‘I mucked up there through not being honest with her. She’s a great girl but obviously not the one for me. I hope she is happy.’

  ‘She is. She and Josh suit each other down to the ground,’ said Lucia. ‘Would you like another cocoa?’

  He hesitated, then shook his head. ‘It’s getting late. I’d best be going.’

  ‘I’ve only ever fancied myself in love once before, and that was a few years ago,’ Lucia mused aloud. ‘I had a real crush on Irene’s brother, Jimmy, but it came to nothing and he’s married now, which is all well and good, so out of reach.’

  ‘Yeah, that’s what’s needed if you fancy somebody and you don’t want to get hurt or to hurt them. You need to put some distance between the two of you.’

  ‘Hmmm. But it was painful.’

  ‘Our Peg did it, and in the end it all worked out OK.’

  ‘That was because she and Pete still cared for each other and he didn’t give up on her but went looking for her,’ said Lucia. ‘Irene told me all about it.’

  ‘She did?’

  ‘Yes. It was a happy ending and, as I told you earlier, I like a happy ending.’

  ‘Me too! I’ve enjoyed this evening, Lucia, but I’m going to have to go. I want to get a good night’s sleep, so I can get up early and work on the ending of the book before taking Jerry and your lot to school.’

  ‘OK, I’ll see you out.’

  ‘Send Jerry home in the morning as soon as you like,’ said Tim, shrugging on his overcoat.

  ‘Will do,’ Lucia said, wasting no time in opening the front door. ‘Good night.’

  She did not linger to watch him go into next door, but washed the cocoa cups before going up to her lonely bed, thinking that at least she had her aunt Babs’s visit to look forward to. At first Lucia could not get to sleep because their conversation kept going round and round in her head. Eventually she fell asleep, but woke up with Tim still in her thoughts. Was she falling in love with him despite Maggie’s warnings?

  Her musings were interrupted by a scream which she recognized as coming from Gabrielle, and hurried to see what her sister was making a fuss about. No doubt it wouldn’t be earth-shattering. She made her way to Gabrielle’s bedroom, where she discovered her youngest sister huddled beneath the bedcovers.

  ‘Why did you scream?’ asked Lucia.

  ‘There’s a flying thing in the room. It touched my face. I thought it was going to bite me so I hid myself.’

  Lucia’s eyes scanned the room swiftly and could not see anything. ‘I think you’ve been imagining things.’

  ‘No. I haven’t,’ cried Gabrielle.

  ‘Did it make a noise?’

  ‘Yes, it snorted.’

  ‘Snorted!’ For a moment Lucia was at a loss to think of a flying insect that made such a noise, and then she left the room and went into the boys’ bedroom. James appeared to be still fast asleep but Joseph’s bed was empty. Of course it was possible that he and Jerry could be in the bathroom, but she suspected they were more likely to be hiding in Gabrielle’s bedroom. The pair of scamps! She hurried along the landing and into her sister’s bedroom; she looked under the bed but there was no sign of the boys. She flopped on to the bed and there came a giggle. Getting up, she went over to the window and drew back a curtain, and there was Jerry.

  Her mouth tightened and she was about to tear a strip off him when a voice said, ‘He’s not to blame.’ She looked about her to see where the voice came from and a movement caught her eye. She saw Joseph peering over the top of the wardrobe. ‘Get down from there, you horror,’ she bellowed.

  ‘I-I c-can’t,’ stuttered her brother. ‘I-I’m stuck.’

  ‘You got up there, so surely you can get down,’ Lucia said.

  ‘I had Jerry’s help, I climbed on his back.’

  ‘You could have slipped and both of you got hurt,’ she said.

  ‘But we didn’t – and the joke worked,’ Joseph said, brandishing a fishing rod with feathers tied to the end of the line.

  ‘Your sister didn’t find it funny.’

  ‘That’s because she’s a misery,’ said Joseph. ‘Will you help me down now, Lucia?’

  ‘No, I won’t. You can stay there all day as punishment.’

  ‘But I’ll miss school and it’s footie today.’

  ‘Tough luck.’ She turned her back on him, ‘Come on, Gabrielle, get out of bed and dressed.’

  ‘I’m not getting dressed with two boys watching me,’ Gabrielle said. ‘If I forgive them, can they go?’

  Seeing nothing for it but to agree, Lucia said, ‘Yes, but don’t think that means you’ll get off scot-free, Joseph. And as for you, Jerry, I’ll be telling your father.’

  Jerry groaned.

  Lucia told him to go downstairs; once he had left the room, she helped Joseph down from the wardrobe. Taking the fishing rod from him she went into her bedroom and hid it. After breakfast she told Jerry to put on his coat, scarf and cap and went outside with him. She was surprised to see Tim on the neighbouring step talking to a young woman.

  He must have heard the door open because he turned and waved. She went with Jerry over to him. ‘I need to talk to you, Tim’ she said, glancing briefly at the woman with him. ‘I wonder if you could spare a few minutes later?’

  ‘Fine, I’ll pop over after I’ve taken the kids to school,’ he said, and introduced the two women. Both looked each other up and down.

  Lucia said, ‘How do you do?’ but did not offer her hand to Isabella, wondering what she was doing at the house that early in the day before turning away almost immediately and saying to Tim, ‘Leave it until this evening. I’ve work to go to now.’ As she walked away she overheard Isabella say, ‘Don’t forget, Timmy boy, I’ll be here this evening to see to all your needs.’ She giggled.

  Once at the coffee bar, Lucia could not stop thinking about Isabella, who was more Tim’s age and extremely attractive and well-groomed, and also of what she had overheard her say on the doorstep earlier. She was so distracted by her thoughts that she made several mistakes over orders, which caused Josh to ask her if she was all right or was there something worrying her, and if so was it something he and Maggie could help with. She reassured him that she was just thinking about something Joseph had done that morning and she was mulling over what punishment she should dole out.

  ‘Boys,’ he said, laughing.

  ‘Yes, boys – not that they’re all the same. James and Joseph are completely different.’ She pulled herself together and got on with her work.

  When she arrived home, she was glad to find Michael at home and that he appeared to be doing homework. Only she would have been more convinced if he didn’t keep lifting his head and staring into space. Theresa was another one who didn’t appear to have her attention on the job in hand; she was standing at the sink up to her elbows in soapsuds, staring out of the window. But Lucia soon realized that her sister could simply be keeping her eye on the younger ones playing in the garden. The
vegetables were on the hob, gently simmering.

  Theresa turned on Lucia. ‘There was no meat to put on.’

  ‘Sorry, I should have told you I’d buy some sausages on the way home. I’ll mash the potatoes and do some onion gravy. You go and have a rest.’ Lucia turned her shopping bag upside down, emptying out the sausages and a box of cream buns that Josh had given her. If she cut them in half, there would be enough for all of them.

  Tim arrived an hour later. Gabrielle was helping Theresa to clear the table while Lucia was making a pot of tea. Michael had gone upstairs to his room and so Lucia waved Tim to a chair at the side of the fireplace. She handed him a cup of tea and half a cream bun on a plate and settled in a chair the other side of the fireplace.

  ‘So, what is it you want to talk about?’ he asked.

  Instead of bringing up the topic of Joseph and Jerry’s misbehaviour that morning, she found herself saying, ‘I’m sorry for interrupting your conversation with Isabella this morning.’

  He gave a half-smile. ‘I was glad of the interruption. She was going on about my time in Australia with the bloke who escaped with me.’

  ‘The one bitten by the snake?’

  ‘Yeah! She seems to think I’m lying about that and the way the pair of us escaped the police during the robbery. She thinks I forced him to go with me, and that I did so because it was me who had the gun, not the other way around. I asked her why I’d want his company? It wasn’t as if we were best mates and, besides, I never had a gun or needed one. I was simply there to drive the car.’

  ‘And what did she say?’

  ‘She seemed lost for words at first, which was unusual. I told her that if she wasn’t going to believe me, then I didn’t want her help any more.’

  ‘So what did she do then?’

  ‘She tried to sweet-talk me, saying she was sorry and that she enjoyed working with me. She then went on to insist that there must have been a lot of tension between me and Sid in light of him pulling a gun on me. Hadn’t I tried to get it off him?’

  ‘I told her I couldn’t do that when I was driving the car.’

  ‘She must be a fool not to have realized that,’ Lucia said, reaching out a hand to him.

  He took it and squeezed it gently. ‘Then she apologized and said that she wasn’t herself because she had got herself into debt and really needed the book to be a big success. I said that I needed it to be a success as well, to support me and my son. That I couldn’t afford to get into debt.’

  ‘I bet that annoyed her,’ Lucia said. ‘Yet she didn’t seem that annoyed when I saw her with you.’

  ‘That’s because I agreed to her coming this evening and reading over what I’d written since last we met.’

  ‘You won’t allow her to get you to change your mind about anything?’

  ‘Of course not. And I’m determined to see the publisher in her company, so she won’t be able to say things about me and my work behind my back,’ said Tim. ‘Right now all I want is to finish the book. I told her a satisfactory ending for me is my being united with my son. Maybe even opening up the garage again and hiring someone to do what I find difficult.’

  ‘That sounds good to me,’ Lucia said.

  ‘She still thinks it isn’t exciting enough. I said that there had been enough excitement in my life, and I’ve described that earlier on in the book.’ He drained his teacup and stood up. ‘I’d best be going. I need to get Jerry ready for bed and do a bit more writing before she comes. I wish I was back at work fixing cars.’

  ‘So you still have your garage?’

  ‘Yes, there’s still a year or so to go on the lease and I haven’t been in the mood to get rid of it. I’ve had my mind on other things and it would have made my life too complicated. I’d have to work out if it was financially viable.’

  ‘You mean it would have to bring in enough money to pay wages and also provide you with an income?’

  He smiled. ‘Yeah! You have a good business head, Lucia. You’re wasted being just a waitress at the coffee bar.’

  ‘It wasn’t what I’d planned to do with my life, but I was already working there part-time when my parents were killed, so it was easier for me to continue working there.’

  ‘I can see that,’ said Tim. ‘Well, I hope life gets better for you.’

  ‘Thanks, but don’t go thinking I’m unhappy, I’m not.’

  He smiled. ‘Thanks for the tea and a share of the cream bun.’

  ‘The bun was courtesy of Josh. He’s generous like that. He knows how I’m situated and often gives me something to feed me and the kids.’

  ‘I can understand why Maggie married him.’

  ‘Yes, he’s a likable, dependable bloke, and he loves her and she loves him.’

  ‘What more could a woman ask for?’ said Tim lightly. He paused on the step. ‘I can’t believe that you wanted to talk to me this evening just about Isabella.’

  ‘I didn’t, but the real reason doesn’t seem important now,’ she said, realizing she did not want to upset him by complaining about Jerry’s misbehaviour. ‘Good evening, Tim.’

  ‘It wouldn’t have been about Jerry, would it?’ Tim asked. ‘Because he told me about the trick he and Joseph played on Gabrielle. I told him if he ever did anything like that again, he wouldn’t be allowed to play with Joseph any more. Good evening, Lucia. See you around.’

  ‘Yes, see you around,’ she said, hoping she had not upset him by using the word dependable of Josh. A trait that Maggie had said Tim didn’t possess. She could think of no other reason why he would have mentioned what Jerry and Joseph had done that morning. He was letting her know that she could depend on him to discipline Jerry by punishing him in a way that would really hurt. She felt warmth flood her and realized that she was falling for Tim against all the odds.

  She called Gabrielle, James and Joseph indoors from where they had been swinging from a lamp-post with some other children and sent them upstairs to wash and clean their teeth before getting in to bed. She asked Theresa to read a story to Gabrielle while she read one to the boys. Although Lucia knew they could read themselves, she was also aware they still enjoyed being read to. Whilst getting the children to bed, she could not help noticing that Michael was nowhere to be seen, and could only think he had gone out, possibly to meet Marjorie again.

  Lucia settled down in front of the fire to sew a button on James’s blazer and to watch the television at the same time. She wished The Avengers was on, but she was going to have to wait a few days before the next episode was shown. She was still unsure if she liked Cathy Gale, clad in her black leather catsuit, although the way she fought the baddies using judo, she supposed it made sense to wear such an outfit, and possibly some would find it sexy. Even so, her favourite character was Steed, because he was witty and she did enjoy the verbal sparring between him and Cathy Gale.

  The minutes ticked by, the hands of the clock reached ten o’clock, and there was no phone call or sign of her brother. Lucia was really annoyed. When eventually she heard his key in the lock, she shot out of her seat and went out into the lobby, ready to blow her top.

  ‘Where d’you think you’ve been?’ Lucia demanded.

  Michael adopted an air of bravado. ‘To the second house of the flicks, and then I saw Marjorie on to the bus and came home.’

  ‘This isn’t on, Michael,’ said Lucia. ‘Why didn’t you tell me you were going out?’

  ‘Because I knew you’d have a moan, despite my having done some homework.’

  ‘A moan! I have a perfect right to moan, as you put it, when you behave so thoughtlessly. I was worried sick, not knowing where you’d gone, and with it getting later and later.’

  ‘I thought you’d have guessed I was with Marjorie,’ he said sulkily.

  ‘I did, but that didn’t make me feel any better. I’d like to know what her mother feels about her daughter not coming home until after eleven o’clock on a school day.’

  ‘Marjorie told her mam she was going to be in l
ate because I was taking her to the flicks in town.’

  Lucia exploded. ‘You could have paid me the same courtesy. Get out of my sight! I’m fed up with you. You selfish little sod!’ She picked up a cushion and threw it at him.

  Michael caught it deftly and threw it back. Lucia stretched up and managed to grip it. She tossed it back at him and he returned it to her. He said, ‘This is ridiculous. I’m sorry you were worried about me. But I’m not a kid any more. I can take care of myself.’

  ‘So you say, but accidents can happen and the pubs won’t have long let out and you could get caught up in a brawl without intending to and get hurt.’

  ‘Gosh, you don’t have much faith in my common sense, do you? Stop worrying and try trusting me.’

  ‘I will if you tell me where you’re going and if you’re going to be late.’

  ‘OK, I’ll try not to forget in future.’

  ‘Never mind trying, you don’t forget. Anyway, I’m going to bed. I’ve work in the morning and you have to be up early for your paper round.’ She stomped out and started up the stairs, only remembering halfway up that she needed to be quieter if she didn’t want to wake the children.

  It was a while before Lucia fell asleep, but at last she drifted off to dream about Tim with a noose around his neck, hanging from a tree and escaping somehow, only to be bitten by a snake. Then Michael was there and hitting the snake on the head with a cushion. She woke up to the sound of a car engine outside, so she slid out of bed to see what was going on. It was still dark, and if it had not been for the street lamp she would not have been able to make out the colour of the car or its licence plate and the face of the man who climbed out and stood looking up at the house. Who was he? She was almost tempted to wake up Michael, only the man got back into the car and drove off. She glanced at the bedside clock and saw that it was two o’clock in the morning. Groaning, she climbed back into bed, hoping she could get asleep quicker this time but without the bad dreams.

  The next time she woke, the room was filled with the pearly light of pre-dawn. She wasted no time getting up and dressed, remembering her peculiar dream. By then the rest of the household was beginning to stir. She went downstairs, then heard Michael thundering down the stairs. He went into the back kitchen and reappeared a few minutes later with a jam butty in one hand and a cup of milk in the other. He drank the milk and left the kitchen, holding the half-eaten jam butty. ‘See you later,’ he said.