Losing Kyler (The Kennedy Boys Book 2)

by Siobhan Davis

  I clamp a hand over my mouth to cover my visible horror. Kal was right. This was a complete setup. Addison had this all planned out. An intense bout of shivering rips up and down my spine. This is bigger than Ky. It’s got to be. There’s no way Addison is doing all this purely to trap him in her bed again. She’s up to something else.

  Ky hops up out of his seat and storms out of the room. I jump up to go after him, but Keaton pulls me back down. Kaden and Keven run out after him, and I try to calm my beating heart.

  “I’m sorry, Kal. I’m so sorry.” Lana looks directly at him. “You didn’t deserve this. I wasn’t thinking straight. It just hurt so much in here.” She cradles her hand against her chest as more tears trickle down her face.

  “It’s okay, I und—”

  “Mr. Kennedy!” the judge roars, slamming her gavel down violently. “You will not speak in my courtroom unless spoken to! This is your final warning.”

  “What a fine mess you have brought to my courtroom,” she says, sending a menacing glare at the prosecutor and Kal’s attorney although her features lose the harsh edge when she faces Lana. “No matter how much he broke your heart, you cannot ever accuse another person of a crime they didn’t commit. Especially one like this. Have you any idea, young lady, how much you have cost the state? How much damage you have caused to those who wish to bring legitimate allegations before my courtroom?”

  Lana’s eyes don’t waver as she eyeballs the judge. “More than I could ever repay, I’m sure, but I’ll accept whatever punishment is deemed necessary. It was important that I came here today to put things right. The public needed to hear me say this because I don’t want this following Kal around.” She swallows noisily. “I don’t want this on my conscience for the rest of my life. And the last thing I want is to sway any rape victim from coming forward. I’m truly sorry.”

  The judge looks angry yet thoughtful. “I’m dismissing all charges against your client,” she says, looking at Kal’s attorney. “You are free to go, Mr. Kennedy, and this court apologizes to you for any distress. I would like Ms. Taylor and Ms. Sinclair taken in for questioning, and pending sufficient evidence, I expect appropriate charges will be brought.”

  Kal leans sideways, whispering in his attorney’s ear.

  “Your Honor, if I may be permitted to approach the bench.” Kal’s attorney walks up to the judge and there’s heated debate, back and forth, before he returns to the desk, updating Kal quickly and quietly.

  “I understand Mr. Kennedy would like to say a few words. You have two minutes, Kalvin.” The judge gives him a curt nod.

  Kal stands, pushing his shoulders back confidently as he starts to speak. “Your Honor, I’d like to appeal for leniency on Lana’s behalf.” Keaton’s eyes go wide as he looks from me to his brothers. “She’s a good person with a good heart, and she never would’ve done anything like this if I hadn’t let her down and if Addison hadn’t played her.” Kal slants his head in Lana’s direction. “This is why I spent so long fighting my feelings for you. You don’t belong in my world. You’re far too good for it. For me. I thought I was ready to be who you needed me to be, but I fell at the first hurdle. I’m so very sorry, Lana. I will never forgive myself for hurting you.” I wipe an errant tear from my eye when Lana starts quietly sobbing. Keaton clutches onto my hand.

  “Don’t blame yourself,” Kal continues, in a gentle tone. “I’ve already forgiven you.”

  His shoulders tremble as he faces the judge. I’m surprised she tolerated this. “I don’t want her charged, Your Honor. It’s not right.” He looks over his shoulder at his parents. James nods in silent agreement. He turns back around. “My family will cover the legal costs, so, please don’t charge Lana with any crime. I don’t want this on her record for life. She deserves the opportunity to move on and put all this behind her as much as I do.”

  Kal sits down, and all the air leaves my lungs. The judge thanks Kal for his heartfelt speech, but she makes no promises. She then draws proceedings to a close, and people start to filter out of the room. I watch as Lana steps out of the witness box on shaky legs. Greta rushes to her daughter’s side and pulls her into her arms. Kal stands up, but his attorney places a cautionary hand on his arm.

  Lana looks up as they pass our row, catching my eye. Her gaze is full of pain and sorrow, and despite all she’s put my cousin through, I can only find compassion in my heart. She’s a victim in this as much as Kal.

  Out in the corridor, we take our time hugging Kalvin. The relief is evident on all our faces. I look down the passageway, stretching my head, looking for any sign of Ky, but I can’t find him or Kaden or Keven.

  “I need to speak to her,” Kal tells James. “Please, Dad. I can’t leave it like this.”

  James and Alex exchange looks, and Alex surprises me by acquiescing first. “I’ll talk to your attorney and see if he can set it up. Hold tight.” Her high heels click-click on the polished marble floor as she walks toward the legal team huddled outside a mahogany door at the far side of the corridor.

  “Ky is going to kill Addison.” Kent chuckles.

  “It’s hardly funny!” I snap, rummaging in my bag for my new phone.

  “Now isn’t the time to be making such jokes. The last thing we need is a return visit to this place,” James states. “I hope today’s been an eye opener, Kent. I don’t ever want to see you here.”

  Kent rolls his eyes. “Chill, Dad. Shoplifting hardly compares to rape.”

  “Bro!” Keanu elbows him in the ribs. “Don’t be so fucking insensitive. Our brother just dodged a bullet, and Faye’s right, it’s no laughing matter. If Lana hadn’t told the truth, Kal may have gone down for this. It’s time you wised up before you end up here.” Keanu sends Kent a knowing look, and Keaton frowns.

  The tappity-tap of Alex’s heels announce her return. “I’m sorry, son, but she won’t speak to you.” She eyeballs me. “However, she has asked to speak with Faye.”

  Kal is in front of me in a hot snot, beseeching me with his eyes. “Please talk to her.”

  “I will. Do you want me to pass on a message?”

  He leans into my ear. “Tell her I’m so sorry and I’ll always love her.” His eyes search mine. “That I’ve always loved her, too.”

  I bob my head. “I’ll tell her.”

  Lana doesn’t look up when I enter the room. The chair scrapes as I sit down. I fold my hands on top of the desk and wait. I’m surprised we are speaking alone—that Greta didn’t insist on chaperoning her. Slowly, her head lifts and she faces me. “You must hate me now.” Her lip quivers.

  I shake my head. “I’ve never hated you. I was upset and disappointed with you, but I’ve never hated you.”

  “Does he hate me?” she whispers.

  “No.” And I proceed to tell her what he said outside.

  Tears flow down her cheeks again, and I pull a tissue from my pocket and hand it to her. “Thanks. I’m such a mess, and I’ve screwed up so badly. My parents can barely look at me.” She blows her nose.

  “That’s to be expected, but they haven’t abandoned you, and they’ll help you get through this. Will you come back?”

  Her sad eyes meet mine. “No. We won’t be returning to Wellesley. I need to move on, and the only way I can do that is if I don’t see him anymore. I believe him when he said he didn’t intentionally set out to hurt me, but the reality is, he would keep doing it. He’s not mature enough to handle this. Maybe, he might’ve been one day, but there can be no recovering from this.” She holds a hand over her mouth as the tears return. “I accused him of rape. I’ve shamed him and brought the media down on him. I can’t believe he talked his parents into covering the costs and they’ve offered to hire their attorneys to represent me should charges be lodged.” She bites down on her lip. “I misjudged them. All of them.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Kal asked m
e to keep our relationship a secret.”

  “But you told Zoe.” Now all Zoe’s barbed comments make sense. She knew what was going on, and she was trying to protect Lana.

  “She caught us kissing one time, and I had to come clean.”

  “You still should’ve told me. Especially after Addison came to you. You knew I didn’t like or trust her.”

  “I couldn’t think straight after she showed me that tape.” Her cheeks pucker. “Besides, you hadn’t exactly confided in me either, had you, Faye?”

  Her tone isn’t accusatory, more matter of fact. “You knew?”

  “I suspected. The way you look at Kyler is the same way I look at Kal.”

  Tension fills the space between us as we stare at one another. “We were trying to keep our relationship a secret, too, for obvious reasons.”

  A sad smile crests her lips. “We’re so stupid. We had so much in common yet we never thought to support one another.”

  I lean back in my chair, rolling a finger across my lips. “I never thought of it like that.”

  “And if we’d confided in one another, then you would’ve talked sense into me about Addison and we wouldn’t be sitting here today.” She sighs. “I’ve fucked up everything, and I’ll be paying for that for the rest of my life. Nothing is going to be the same.”

  “Will you keep in contact with me?”

  Her lips curve up at the corner. “You want to?”

  I smile. “Yeah. I’d like to know you’re okay.” I think that would help Kal.

  “I’ll send you my new deets but only if you promise to keep this between us. Kal can’t know, and you can’t ever give him my number. I need to let him go, Faye. For both our sakes.”

  I don’t like the thought of lying to my cousin, but I figure he would understand and prefer that at least one of us is keeping in touch with the little girl who claimed his heart when they were kids. “Okay. I promise.”

  She gets up and walks around the desk. I stand. She pulls a white envelope out of her bag and hands it to me. “Can you give him this?”

  I secure it in my bag. “Of course. You mind yourself, Lana.” I’m briefly tempted to hug her, but I can’t forget what she’s put Kal through these last few months, and she’ll have to work to earn back my trust. I give her a short wave and walk out of the room, feeling a little lighter than when I entered it.

  Kal is on me instantly, and I quickly fill him in on our conversation. I hand him the envelope, and he goes off by himself to read it in private. The rest of us move toward the exit, and we catch up to Keven and Kaden in the lobby. As soon as I spot them, I run toward them. “Where is he? Is he okay?”

  Kaden pulls me off to the side as Keven stays to update the rest of the family. “I’m not going to lie, he’s in a bad way. He thinks this is all his fault for getting involved with Addison in the first place. He was all set to go over there and give her a piece of his mind, but we talked him off the ledge. He said he needs some time alone so we let him go, but in all honesty, I think he needs you.”

  “You know.”

  “He came to me last week and told me everything. He loves you. I’ve never heard my brother talk about any girl the way he talks about you. I know I’ve no right to ask you this, but please find it in your heart to forgive him. He needs you. When he was with you, he was happy. I didn’t know what was behind his good mood, but I was glad to see him in a better place. When he came to me last week, I could see how lost he was again. He’s falling back into that dark space, and I’m very worried about him.”

  “He hurt me, Kaden, and although I’ve forgiven him, I don’t know if I can forget. I want to, God knows I do, but I’m struggling.” It’s only as I vocalize the words that I realize I’m already in that place. After hearing how far-reaching Addison’s manipulations extend, it’s easier to let it go. Continuing to push Ky away serves no purpose except giving Addison what she wants. She has no hold over us anymore, and there is no reason why I need to keep my distance from him. He is a victim too, and instead of supporting him, I’ve been punishing him. That needs to stop now.

  “I understand. He explained.” Kaden places his hands lightly on my forearms. “My brother has always had this darkness inside him, and he doesn’t let people in easily. But he let you in, and it’s more than that, isn’t it?”

  “We get each other, in a way I’ve never connected with anyone else. Ever.”

  “That sounds too precious to throw away.”

  I level a puzzled look at him. “You’re not freaked out over the cousin thing?”

  He barks out a laugh. “Seriously? With all the shit this family is dealing with, that’s the least of our troubles.” His expression grows serious again. “Why does society get to dictate who we can and can’t love anyway?” He looks introspective. “Ky needs you. Please be there for him. But if you can’t, I understand.”

  “I’ll find him. I’ll help him. I want to make things right between us.” I gulp nervously. “I love him too.”

  When we arrive back at the house, Brad is waiting in the lobby. While he has seen updates on TV, and I messaged him a few quick updates from the car, he isn’t fully up to speed yet. I explain everything to him as I walk to my bedroom to get changed. “Fuck! Addison is seriously deranged. What the hell is her fixation with Ky and this family? That is not normal behavior.”

  I head into my closet to get changed. “I don’t know, and it’s concerning, but she’s in some serious shit now. I hope they throw the book at her. It’s no less than she deserves,” I call out, as I shuck out of my skirt and shirt and pull on my comfy jeans and favorite pale pink sweater. I kick my heels off and grab my boots, padding back into my room. I plop down on the bed to pull my socks on. “He hasn’t been back here, has he?”

  “No,” Brad confirms, slouching against my dresser. “And I’ve tried calling him like a million times since the news broke.”

  “I think I know where he is.” I slip my feet into my boots and lace them up. “Do you know the lake where Ky goes sometimes?” Brad nods. “I’m betting he’s there. Can you drive me?”

  “Of course. Let me grab my jacket, and I’ll meet you out front.”

  “Today must’ve been so surreal, huh?” Brad asks, when we are out on the motorway. He’s fiddling with the radio station, trying to find something decent to listen to.

  “You’ve no idea. I felt like I was in the middle of an episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians or a cross between that and Special Victims Unit.”

  “I still can’t believe Lana got suckered in by Addison. She’s a smart girl. It doesn’t make sense.”

  “She was heartbroken and vulnerable, and Addison pounced.” I grind down on my teeth. “Addison better hope she’s arrested because I will not be responsible for my actions if I see her.”

  “You can bet she’ll be keeping a low profile.”

  Brad brings the car to a stop at the end of the dirt track. “This is as far as I can go. I’ll walk down with you, to make sure he’s here.” He squints up at the sky. “It’s getting dark, and I don’t like the idea of you wandering around out here by yourself.”

  We hop out of the car and Brad retrieves a blanket from the boot, arranging it around my shoulders. “You don’t have a jacket, and the air is turning.”

  “Thanks.” We walk in silence toward the lake. As we emerge from the long grass, I sigh in relief when I spot Ky. He’s hunched over with his back against a tree, looking like he’s carrying the weight of the nation on his shoulders.

  “I’ll leave you here,” Brad whispers, shoving his hands in his pockets.

  I frown. “You’re not coming, too?”

  His nose scrunches up. “Nah. I’ll talk to him later. I figure he needs the type of comfort only you can provide.”

  “Okay. Thanks for the lift.” He turns around, and I reach out, holding onto his arm. “You�
��re a good friend.” He smiles, but it doesn’t quite meet his eyes. “To both of us.”

  He gives me a lopsided shrug. “I’ll see you back at the house.”

  I watch him walk away, all hunched over and deflated, and I hate how things have altered between us, that he’s so guarded around me. I’m too chicken to confront the fact he’s still harboring feelings for me, because I don’t know what to do about it.

  Holding the blanket securely around me, I set out toward Ky.

  His head jerks up as my feet crunch on the debris underfoot. His eyes glow a little as he looks around.

  “Hey.” I maneuver the blanket around my body so it’s covering me lengthways and drop down on the ground beside him. “How are you holding up?”

  He picks up a stone and flings it out onto the lake. We watch in silence as it skims four times before disappearing under the calm water. “You want the truth?” he asks, a couple minutes later.

  I twist my body around so I’m facing him. “Always.”

  “I’m figuring it would be better for everyone if I took off, because she’s not ever going to go away. She’s poison and she’s trying to destroy everyone I love. She’ll give up if I disappear.”

  I reach out and take his cold hands in mine, squeezing gently. “You can’t do that. You can’t let her win.”

  “I only wanted to protect you, to protect Kal, but I’ve ended up making everything worse.”

  “I know your motivations were pure and that your heart was in the right place”—I say quietly—“but you can’t always protect everyone, all the time, and that responsibility shouldn’t fall on your shoulders.”

  “Maybe it shouldn’t, but I will always put myself on the line to protect those I love.” There’s a faraway look in his eyes, and his Adam’s apple jumps in his throat. Picking up another stone, he throws it with the full strength of his pent-up frustration. A dart of pain washes over his face, and there’s an undercurrent of something indecipherable in the air.

  “Why is it so important to you?” I ask, because I’m sensing there is more to this than a basic protective instinctive.