Unconvinced, he cocks one eyebrow and laughs. With a wide grin, his embarrassment starts to dissolve.
“I was really hoping it would be mind blowing for you. I even arranged for fireworks,” he says with a smirk.
Following his watch, I finally glance out the window above the bed frame and notice an array of dazzling colors sizzling in the sky.
I squirm a little under him, trying to keep from laughing at his joke. He starts trailing small kisses along my jaw towards my ear again. My heart speeds up and heat spreads throughout my body.
“We could try again,” I boldly suggest because I just cannot get enough of him.
“You read my mind . . .” He smiles, pulling me on top of him as he rolls onto his back.
I sit up, with my legs on either side of him and giggle as panic rises up into my throat.
“I want to look at you.” His voice comes out in a low sensual whisper that sends tingles from my center down to my toes and back up again.
He slides his hands down to my hips and I rise up, letting my knees sink into the mattress.
His throat shifts as he swallows and then lowers his gaze down my body, like it’s a work of art he is admiring.
Smoothing my hands over his chest, I stare back at him, a little more comfortable in my skin than I was a little bit ago, yet still hesitant.
“Umm, I’ve never done it like this.”
He smiles and rubs his hand up and down my hips in a soft caress.
“I guess we’ll figure it out together then.”
His words send a rocket of excitement and thrill through me, knowing we will share this first as well.
We both nervously shift and move, stumbling to find the perfect rhythm. We stare into each other’s eyes during the more intense moments and then end up laughing at our inexperience in the next instance.
Eventually when we figure it out, it is beyond magical; it’s perfect.
Judd pulls himself up in a sitting position, careful to not break our tempo. I’m frantic with need and desire as electric currents build and build. He seems just as desperate as me, trying to put his mouth and hands all over my body all at once. We truly cannot get enough of each other.
Once I’m spiraling into a pool of pleasure and yelling out his name, I notice the fireworks still lighting up the night’s sky.
I roll onto my back and lay quietly beside Judd as we both try to catch our breath.
“Was that better? Did you . . .” Judd asks looking at me through the corner of his eyes.
“Yes, I did.” A giggle erupts from my mouth.
Right then, above our heads we see what seems to be billions of fireworks exploding in the sky all at the same time.
“Just . . . Like . . . That!” I burst out laughing, pointing out the window to the grand finale of tonight’s fireworks show.
He cracks up and winks, saying, “Yeah, I planned it that way.”
I WAKE UP LYING ON my side, snuggled up to Judd’s chest with his arms firmly wrapped around me and our legs tangled together. He stirs and the soft caress of his fingertips on my hip send a heat wave rippling through my body.
Pulling my face away to gaze at him, I am met with sleepy hazel eyes that overflow with so much warmth and love that I have to remind myself to breathe.
“Good morning,” he whispers while bending his neck to place a gentle kiss on my lips.
I worm my body closer to him and wiggle from the tingles that his kiss sends zipping through me. His eyes widen for a brief moment and then his lips rise into a playful smile.
Flipping me over so that his body is above mine, he lets out a soft laugh and I immediately become aware of his morning status.
My body lights up with desire and all I can think about is how good he made me feel last night. He presses his body in an upward motion against me causing me to close my eyes from the exhilaration as tingles of pleasure roll through me.
My skin instantly warms and my breath kicks up as he plants small wet kisses on my neck. Oh yes, I am ready.
Just then the cabin door flings open and Judd rips the sheet up to cover our bareness.
“Get up you two love birds. We have to fly the coop in half an hour,” Evan says with a chuckle from the front room.
Judd remains pressed against me to shield me from his line of sight, while he cranes his neck to give him a dirty look. Not expecting anyone to waltz right in, we had left the bedroom door wide open.
“You jerk off! Go pester someone else!”
Evan laughs at Judd’s annoyance and then we hear cabinet doors opening and closing from the kitchen.
Judd returns his attention back to me. “I am so sorry that he . . .” Judd begins but is quickly cut off.
Evan calls out from the front room, “So you guys finally did the deed! Thank God!! It’s about time! Man, you have been a walking hard-on since she got here!”
Quiet chuckles bounce from word to word as he speaks leaving very little mystery behind whether he knows that he completely interrupted something.
Judd’s face turns to a look of panic and embarrassment with his eyebrows lowered into a frown. His mouth is wide open in shock and I can’t help but spit out a giggle while burying myself into his chest.
The floor creaks as Evan walks into the room. I look around Judd’s shoulder and see him casually leaning against the doorframe with a smirk on his face, squirting something onto his finger and then licking it off. What is that!?
Judd grabs the pillow beside my head and launches it at his friend. Evan ducks and the pillow hits him in the shoulder.
He returns to his lazy slouch against the doorway and an even wider, more mischievous grin appears on his face as he shakes a can of whipped cream in his hand. “Nice,” he quips, holding up his prize.
Where on earth did the whip cream come from?
“Holy shit, man . . . do you mind! At least let us get dressed!” Judd yells with a tint of blush to his face.
Evan laughs and very dramatically turns to walk away, holding his free hand to his chest as if Judd’s words just shot a hole through his heart.
Headed towards the front door, he hollers out, “No more pounding privates! We don’t have time for that! Fifteen minutes and I’m coming back in to pull you guys apart, naked or not.”
I can just imagine the totally pleased expression on his face as he announces this.
When the cabin door closes, we know we only have a few minutes alone before it is time to leave our fairytale world. Judd pulls me to lie against his chest for what I feel like may be our last embrace ever. Will we see each other again after this? Is this the end? How did this happen in such a short time? The ache in my heart from knowing I have to say goodbye today is killing me. A tear slips from my eye and drips down my cheek.
He wipes another escaped tear from my face and whispers “Hey, this is not goodbye.” He pauses, searching for the right words, “This is just I’ll see you later. When you get home, you’ll call me and I’ll call you. I’ll come see you and you’ll come see me. Trust me this is just the beginning of this, not the end,” he tells me as he motions his fingers between us with a warm smile.
His words give me hope, but I still know we are going in two different directions for college and distance is never a good thing.
Lifting my chin so that I am looking directly into his eyes, he goes on, “If you’re worried about when we leave for college, don’t be. There’s no need to worry about that now.”
His words remind me of what my mom always tells me: don’t worry until there is something to worry about. I nod my head in understanding and give him a small kiss, wishing we could just stay under the covers, wrapped up in each other all day; all summer.
“Besides, I would travel to the moon and back if it meant I would be with you, so California to Indiana is going to be a breeze. We’ll see each other, I promise.”
He presses his lips hard against mine in a passion filled kiss, and then pulls away with a sigh.
“We
better get some clothes on before Evan busts in and drags us out of bed. He was completely serious when he said he would.” We both laugh.
Reluctantly sliding out of bed, I clutch the sheet to my chest as I look over at Judd, who is shamelessly standing and dressing under my watchful eyes. I make sure to enjoy the view and judging by his constant chuckles, he definitely knows I am admiring the scenery.
It takes less than five minutes for me to throw on my clothes and I am surprised when I see that my bag has been conveniently placed in the bathroom. I guess my assumptions were right. Abby must have had a hand in helping Judd set up.
We ride back to our side of the lake with me once again on Judd’s lap. I sit with my back to Evan, out of fear that he may see how emotional I am. I cannot handle any teasing right now.
Judd keeps his hand tightly clutched around mine, squeezing it every now and again. Reveling in his warmth as I lay my head against his neck, I take long deep breaths to memorize the natural woodsy sent of his skin. His other hand grips around my waist and as we near my cabin, his hold is unyielding.
As we pull into the lot, we find everyone mingling, saying their goodbyes and some have even already left, but Tristan impatiently stands by his car with his arms folded and a scowl on his face.
“I’ll see you around, I’m sure,” Evan calls to me as Judd says his goodbyes to the girls.
After waving goodbye to Evan, we walk over to Tristan’s small red sports car as he lowers his sunglasses and frowns at Judd.
“Glad you could make it. We have to go. I have to get to work,” he spits out with a bit of a slur that automatically puts me on alert.
“Are you drunk, man?” Judd asks in an infuriated tone.
“No.” He rolls his eyes and blows out an exaggerated breath. “I’m not drunk, I’m just hung over. Get in,” he demands.
Judd pulls me to the side. “Don’t worry. I’ll switch with him when we stop to gas up,” he assures me. My heart feels like it may explode from pain as he whispers in my ear, “I’ll call you later. I love you,” and then places a gentle kiss on my lips.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, he lifts me off the ground in a huge bear hug.
“I love you, too,” I cry into his ear.
I’m prepared to never let go, until Tristan clears his throat in sheer annoyance.
“Come on, Bro, there will be plenty of tail to chase at college.”
Judd sits me down and spins around, bending into the car to make eye contact with his brother.
“Shut the hell up and give me a minute.”
He turns back to me with sadness written across his beautiful face.
“Ignore him, Alyssa. He doesn’t know anything about us. I love you and I will talk to you later today . . . Ok?”
He shrinks down to my level so that he can look me in the eyes. Pushing back the tears that are threatening to spill over, I give him one last kiss and let go, so this won’t be any harder on either of us.
He steps away hesitantly, gets in and slams the door shut behind him. As soon as he reaches his arm through the open window and grasps my hand tightly, I know that this is bothering him just as much as me. My heart falls and my hand empties as Tristan pulls away and Judd’s hand slips from mine.
I watch them drive off, keeping my eyes locked onto the side mirror where I can see him watching me as well.
Once they are out of sight, a deep emptiness settles in my chest and I realize not only did he leave, but he took my heart with him. Arms drape across my shoulders, squeezing my neck from behind and I automatically know it is my sister trying to offer a sense of comfort.
“Well this sucks . . . back to reality, I guess.”
I manage a smile with her words and then we head into the cabin, both of us knowing what our actual reality may entail once we get home.
We end up enjoying a bit more of the day before we hit the road, three hours behind the guys. After putting my bags in the van, I go for a walk by myself, swinging by all the places that now hold a special place in my heart.
I stroll to the shower house with visions of his body against mine flickering through my mind. Then I wander down to the boathouse, over to Judd’s cabin and back over to the wooded area where he and I spent our first night talking and getting to know each other. I know I will hear from him later, but I have to commit every moment we spent together to my memory before I leave this place.
Abby was right when she said I would have the time of my life on this trip.
Once I have memorized every location and time spent there, I make my way up to the van. Looking around one last time, I repeat to myself, “I’ll see you later” with a small smile on my face to mask the fear I really feel in my heart.
THE RIDE BACK FROM THE lake is less than desirable to say the least. We were all exhausted and cranky. Mix that with six hung over girls, plus me feeling completely heartbroken and that equals a disastrous trip home.
Little by little, the van empties out as we drop off all the girls. Once we make it to our subdivision, it is only Piper, Abby and me. After waving goodbye to Piper as she drops us off, we drag ourselves up to our bedrooms to crash.
My eyes open at the crack of dawn the next day. As soon as I see light showering through my window, I panic. Judd was supposed to call me when he got home and I must have slept through it. In full-on-freak-out mode, I bolt up out of bed and snatch up my phone. Excitement and anxiety surges through my veins with the thought of speaking to him, but my heart quickly falls when I see that there are no missed calls. Why hasn’t he called me?
They had to leave out early because Tristan had something going on, but Judd had mentioned that he didn’t have much to do between now and him leaving for California in two weeks.
Completely confused and a little worried, I scroll through my texts and recent calls just to make sure, but I find nothing. Glancing at the clock, I take in the fact that it is only 7:21 in the morning. Maybe I should wait till later to call him in case he is still sleeping. Judd was always up at the crack of dawn, but I’m sure he was just as tired as I was when he got home; he may have zonked out.
The morning hours drag by and with each passing minute my anxiety level grows. Not only am I antsy to hear from him, but my parents are coming home this evening and I am very nervous to hear about Dad’s test results.
Three and a half hours later, I cannot wait any longer. I don’t care if he is dog tired and wanting to sleep till noon, I am waking him up. Besides, hearing his sleepy voice in my ear will bring back sweet memories of waking up next to him these past two weeks. I pull up his name in my contacts and hit dial. My heart drums into my throat as I place it to my ear, expecting to hear it ring, but instead it goes straight to voicemail. I hang up and don’t leave a message. Last thing I want to be is one of those girls stalking their boyfriend and continuously leaving message after message. He’ll call me as soon as he has a chance.
Morning soon turns into afternoon and I start to get nervous. Not wanting to seem too needy and fill his phone up with missed calls, I call him only one more time.
Kyle drove me absolutely nuts the last few weeks with his relentlessness. Plus after thirty messages or so, it really bordered on pathetic. He did owe me an apology, but that could be done in one phone call. Instead he was determined to explain his motives for cheating. I didn’t care for an explanation anymore, so I ended up deleting all of the messages.
By night fall, I am on the verge of tears. Could I have misunderstood him? Maybe he meant he was going to call me as soon as he got back from California. But that was two weeks away. No, he didn’t mean that. He said we would see each other. Oh, why am I freaking out; it’s been a day!
My parents get back after dinner. They seem to be in good spirits carrying on about how much fun they had with my nephews, but Abby and I finally pry them off the subject of the trip to ask the questions that have been weighing on our minds.
“Ok, so did you get the test results back yet?” Abby asks nervously as
I chew on my thumb nail, anxiously awaiting their answer.
“Actually we have been on pins and needles waiting to hear, but honestly we haven’t heard anything. We have another appointment scheduled for tomorrow, so we’re going to speak to the doctor then and hopefully find out more,” Mom explains.
On top of my already wound up nerves, this makes me feel as though I could puke. No way am I going to sleep tonight and of course, I don’t.
The next day goes by in a crawl with me staring at my phone for nearly half of it. I should be focused on Dad’s appointment, but I cannot get my mind off of Judd. I guess, in a way, I now understand why Kyle filled my phone up with calls and texts, because honestly the more time that passes, the more panic stricken I become. I literally want to call him every half an hour until he picks up, thinking that the endless ringing will send a telepathic signal to his brain telling him that he should call me. Considering, that is pretty obsessive, I resist the urge until mid afternoon.
By then I am going insane with questions, worry and confusion. I dial his number, but this time a disconnected message rings in my ear.
You have reached a number that is no longer in service. . . .
What?! No way! Something has to be wrong.
Sitting on the edge of my bed, I hold the phone on my lap looking at it like I can will it to ring somehow. Screw worrying about appearing clingy. I dial it again.
You have reached a number that is no longer . . .
Slamming my finger down on the end button, I toss my phone to the floor with fear and heartache boiling in my veins. I want very badly to chuck it against the wall, but if it’s broke he’ll never be able to call. My eyes start to blur and a stabbing pain throbs in my heart. I don’t understand. Wait . . . what if . . .
I yank my phone back up off the floor and scroll over the text I sent from Judd’s phone the night we took pictures. Damn, it’s the same number. My heart drops when I realize that there’s no chance I was dialing the wrong number all along.
Tumbling through my mind, I struggle to think of anything that could cause his phone to be disconnected or his lack of calling, because the obvious is not an option. His voicemail was an automated voice so maybe it is still possible that I have the wrong number.
Take My Breath Away Page 12
