Tending Tara (Alaska Blizzard Book 8)

by Kat Mizera

  Tara seemed really excited about the prospect of coaching, and he didn’t blame her. It was a great opportunity, and he was going to enjoy hearing about it once everything came together. They were getting married in three days, and hopefully the team would help them work things out.

  “There’s Cassie,” Tara said. “Have you met her?”

  He shook his head. “No. I’ve seen her play when I’ve come to see you play, but we’ve never been introduced.”

  “She’s really good. A bit older than some of the other girls, I think she’s working while going to college, but I don’t know much about her beyond hockey.”

  “Honestly, I didn’t even know there was a women’s team here until I saw that email looking for a coach,” he admitted. “Their PR department sucks.”

  “It’s small,” Tara said. “To be honest, I think that’s part of the reason they’re interested in me. Knowing my relationship to Miikka gives them an in with the Blizzard, and that probably made me more appealing than my basic resume.”

  “Well, I’m sure that’s a bonus, but don’t sell yourself short. Remember, they said no one with much experience wants to work for what they pay.”

  “I know.” She stood up as the team took the ice for warm-ups.

  The game was a lot more exciting than Donovan had anticipated, though the Tudor team lost. There was a lot of talent on the team, but they needed structure and guidance, since there had been far too many penalties and a lack of cohesion. Coach Azure seemed to know what he was doing, but the ladies either weren’t listening or there was something going on internally that was hard to pinpoint.

  “Do you want to go back to the locker room with me?” she asked.

  He shook his head. “This is your thing, and I don’t want to take the focus away from you. They know me here since I do those goalie clinics now and then, so it’s not a big deal. I’ll wait here for you, okay?”

  She smiled and leaned over to kiss him. “I’ll be back.”

  16

  The ladies in the locker room were in a bad mood after the 3-0 loss and Tara spoke quietly with Coach Azure after saying hello to everyone.

  “We just can’t get it together out there,” he said, frustration seeping into his tone. “I’m really looking forward to having you around for fresh perspective because I don’t know what to do with them.”

  “If you’d like me to come to practice,” she said slowly, “I can do it in a volunteer capacity, without payment, until I get my visa sorted out.”

  He hesitated. “I hate to ask you to work free of charge, but I could really use a woman’s perspective but nothing I’ve tried that’s hockey-related works.”

  “Just tell me when.”

  “Monday afternoon, three o’clock.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  “Hey, Tara.” Cassie came by and nodded.

  “Hey. You looked good out there. Sorry you lost, though.”

  “Yeah, I’m getting used to it.” Cassie glanced at her watch and tossed her bag over her shoulder. “Well, gotta run, I’m late for work. See you tomorrow!”

  “Bye.” Tara waved.

  “Cassie’s one of my better players, both on and off the ice,” Coach Azure said. “We named her captain and she’s doing her best, but the girls don’t have the same passion she does. I know it’s hard, with us being a two-year college, but if they’re not going to put in the effort, I don’t understand why they’re here.”

  “I’ll try to find out when I come to practice,” Tara said. “I’m sorry my visa is taking so long.”

  “I just hope the higher-ups don’t hire someone else while we’re waiting.”

  “Me too. Good night, Coach.” Tara turned and went to find Donovan.

  “How’d it go?” he asked.

  “They’re frustrated, but I’m going to come to practice Monday, unofficially of course, to see if I can help out.”

  “That sounds good.”

  “So where are we off to?” she asked once they were in his SUV.

  “You want to go to my place? You haven’t seen it yet so I thought you might want to.”

  “Is that code for something?” she asked, her lips turning up in amusement.

  “For sex? Nah. This is straightforward ‘do you want to see my house?’ The sex can happen anywhere, any time, just say the word.”

  “Which word, exactly, is the sex word?”

  He chuckled. “Pretty much all of them.”

  They both laughed.

  “Did you buy your house before you were married?” she asked as they pulled into his garage.

  He shook his head. “We were already married when we bought it, but she didn’t want anything to do with Alaska, much less helping me buy a house here. She came out a few times, and we decorated and stuff, but mostly she wanted to fly home to Buffalo to be with her family and friends. Even when I left on the shortest road trips, she’d go home. And then she wouldn’t come back for weeks, sometimes months. That was essentially the end.”

  “But why?” Tara asked curiously as she got out of the SUV and followed him inside. “I understand missing your family, but you were her husband. Didn’t she love you?” It seemed like common sense to Tara, but it must have caught Donovan off guard because he paused, turning to look at her.

  “You know, I don’t know if she ever did. Not really. Not the way you’re supposed to love the person you plan to spend the rest of your life with.” He hesitated. “And I guess if I’m a hundred percent honest, I didn’t love her like that, either. I thought I did, but the more time we spent apart, the more I realized I didn’t miss her. I missed having company, I missed the sex, I even missed a few specific things we used to do together, but most of it I could get anywhere. My buddies are excellent company, good sex isn’t that hard to find if you’re not interested in the emotional connection, and by the end, there was no emotional connection between us, either.”

  “I’m sorry.” Tara looked around. “I can’t comment on what she was feeling or thinking, but I guess she had other priorities.”

  “Definitely.” He reached for Tara’s hand. “Let me show you around downstairs.”

  “Okay.” She let him lead her into a huge, two-story great room with a floor-to-ceiling stone fireplace with built-in shelves on either side, a massive beige sectional that took up a large part of the room, and then floor-to-ceiling windows unlike anything she’d ever seen. Gage’s house was gorgeous, but these windows took her breath away.

  “Wow…” She was a little awestruck staring at them. “These windows are magical. Truly magical.”

  “I thought so, too.” He smiled, sliding an arm around her shoulders. “It’s one of the reasons I bought the house. You want to hang out in here?”

  “Just tell me where the bathroom is first, and then yes, let’s do that.”

  “The downstairs powder room is right over there.” He motioned with his head. “Go ahead and do your thing and I’ll get the fire going.”

  “Perfect.” She hurried into the bathroom to fluff up her hair and put a dab of gloss on her lips. The last time they’d been together had been incredible. There was sex and then there was sex, the kind of coupling that ruined you for others. He was the whole damn package, and she didn’t like feeling so vulnerable with a man. Especially this soon. There was a lot going on between them, and on Monday they were getting married. Too bad it wasn’t a real marriage and she’d have to hide all these real feelings.

  He’d mentioned having her move in this week, but she’d put it off for some reason, as if moving in here would be too much reality. She had so many things she wanted to ask him, things she didn’t know about him, but there wasn’t a lot of down time. Between her nanny jobs and his hockey, they made time to chat and hung out a little, but there were never any lazy mornings in bed or evenings cuddled up on the couch where they could just relax and talk.

  That’s why you need to move in, she thought.

  She definitely needed to talk to him about her ne
ed to talk to him. If that made any sense. She had a feeling he would understand, though, because he seemed to be an intuitive guy, which was one of many things she liked about him.

  When she went back into the great room, Donovan had turned down the lights and lit a fire in the fireplace. He had a bottle of wine on the table and two wineglasses, and he turned to her with a smile.

  “Do you like red wine?”

  “I do.”

  “Here you go.” He poured them each a glass and handed her one as she sank down beside him on the sectional.

  “Thank you for coming with me tonight,” she said, taking a sip. “I’m sure hockey is the last thing you want to do on your nights off.”

  “Like I said when you brought it up, I don’t like to do a lot of hockey on my days off, but something like that, watching a team that has meaning for you, or watching you play, I’ll always be down for that.”

  “And I appreciate it.” She leaned over and pressed her lips to his. “I appreciate you.”

  “Ditto.” He kissed her lightly, his tongue toying with hers before pausing to take another sip of wine.

  “Can we talk?” she whispered against his cheek.

  “Of course.” He pulled back, cocking his head slightly. “Pre-marriage jitters kicking in?”

  Yup. Totally intuitive.

  She smiled. “A little.” She huffed out a breath. “Okay, a lot.”

  “Then tell me what’s on your mind.”

  “So many things. I don’t know how we do this.”

  “Like, which things?”

  “Well, for starters, how do we keep it a secret from our families and friends while simultaneously keeping immigration satisfied?”

  “Once the NHL gets involved, I don’t think immigration will be a problem.”

  “You really believe this is going to work out?” she asked softly. “I feel like I owe you a huge debt of gratitude for what you’re doing.”

  “You owe me nothing. It’s probably an unorthodox start to a relationship, but what the hell, right? We’re having fun together, we like each other, the sex is fantastic, and this gets you something you really want. I’m protected financially, and the worst thing that happens to you is that it doesn’t work out, we get divorced, and you have to go back to Finland. Which is where your family is, so it’s not like you’d be homeless or something.”

  “No, of course not. And you’re right. I don’t know why I’m letting my nerves get the best of me.”

  “Then let’s talk. Ask me some of the stuff that’s on your mind, and at some point, we’ve got to go to bed because we both have to be up early for your game.”

  “Sounds perfect.”

  They talked for a while, until the fire burned low in the fireplace and they’d finished the bottle of wine. She felt better already, and it was comfortable here.

  “Ready to go to bed? I’m beat.” He got to his feet and then reached out his hands.

  “Me too.” She took them and let him help her up. He slid an arm around her shoulders as they took the stairs up to the master bedroom.

  “Your bed is massive,” she said when he turned on the lamp on the bedside table.

  “California king,” he said. “I need room to stretch out.”

  “We only had double beds in Finland,” she said, unbuttoning her jeans. “And that’s what I have at Gage’s house, too. I won’t know what to do in a bed this size.”

  Donovan laughed, pulling off his shirt. “Oh, I’m pretty sure I have a few ideas.”

  17

  The next two days went by in a blur. Tara moved into his house, and they’d signed and sent back the prenup. They’d spent Sunday looking for wedding rings and had agreed to wear them on chains around their necks. If they were ever in a situation where they unexpectedly had to talk to someone from immigration, they were easy to put on, but in general, no one would see them so they wouldn’t have to explain to people that they’d eloped. He would probably stuff the chain and ring in his bag whenever he was playing hockey and not bring it at all on the road, since there was no need. It would also be hard for him to hide something like that when he was constantly getting undressed in front of his teammates. At some point, someone would notice so leaving it home where it was safe was the easiest thing to do.

  It was trippy for Donovan to think he was getting married again tomorrow, and that night as he fell asleep, he tried to avoid considering the emotional parts of it. His last wedding had been amazing. Bachelor and bachelorette parties, friends and family from all over the world flying into Buffalo to celebrate with them, and all the bells and whistles. From the thousand-dollar cake to her ten-thousand-dollar dress, they’d gone all out. Now that he was older and wiser, it seemed like a spectacular waste of money, but at the time he’d been all in.

  In retrospect, he wished he’d done things differently. Taken more time to understand that Jane wasn’t going to be happy moving from city to city. Focused on more than how pretty she was and how good the sex was. Maybe even tried to look at things from her perspective. Because even though he’d tried to make his marriage work, he hadn’t put any thought at all into what she’d been going through. She was from a relatively small town outside of Buffalo. Until they’d started dating, she’d never been on a plane or traveled more than six hours away from home by car. He should have known his lifestyle would be hard on her.

  This time, though the marriage itself was solely for Tara to get her green card and/or citizenship, there was still a relationship between the two of them and he wanted to be a better husband than he’d been the first time. It didn’t make much sense since he had no idea what was going to happen or how long they’d stay married, but it was important to him to be better. Deep down, he wasn’t sure whether or not he was ready for…feelings. Not those kinds of feelings anyway. He’d allowed himself to feel everything with Jane but hadn’t put any effort into the marriage. This time, he was going to try to be a better husband while simultaneously protecting his heart.

  It probably wouldn’t be easy, though. He’d never met a gorgeous, hockey-playing, college-educated, sexy, adventurous, athletic woman who fulfilled every single one of his fantasies about the ideal woman. So if the choice was to let her go or marry her, he was going to marry her. No matter how crazy it sounded. His lawyer had asked him if he was sure at least a dozen times, and even Gage had been surprised. The only one who’d seemed completely at ease with it was Miikka, which made no sense at all. Why wasn’t her brother more concerned about this friends-with-benefits-and-a-wedding-ring situation? If it had been Donovan’s sister, he would’ve asked a lot more questions.

  Strangely enough, despite his own concerns, his immediate goal was to make sure Tara was okay. She hadn’t said anything, but it was obvious to him that she had a lot on her mind as well. It made sense that she would feel out of sorts since this was such an untraditional marriage, but in the grand scheme of things, it could have been much worse. Lots of cultures still believed in arranged marriages where the couple didn’t even meet until their wedding day, and in this case, not only did they know each other, they liked each other.

  At least, he thought they did.

  That was his last thought before he fell asleep, and in the morning when Donovan opened his eyes, he realized it was his wedding day. Again.

  Since the team had practice on Monday, they were at the courthouse as soon as it opened with Miikka and Charli standing up for them. It was over quickly, since everyone had to get to work, and Donovan felt a moment of guilt as Tara drove his SUV home and he went on to practice with Miikka. She needed her own car, and he wondered if that was too extravagant for a wedding present?

  “Hey, do you think we could stop at a store on the way home?” he asked him. “I’d like to buy some flowers for Tara. Does she like roses?”

  Miikka nodded. “She loves flowers. Mostly pink.”

  “Pink? Really?”

  Miikka chuckled. “Yes. Also, purple.”

  “Tell me something else I
can get her that might make her smile. I think she’s a little freaked out about the marriage thing, and I’d like to make tonight at least a little bit special.”

  “Romantic dinner out somewhere?” he suggested. “Or have a romantic dinner delivered so you can relax at home together? I think she’s nervous because you don’t have much time as a couple and it’s difficult to live with someone until you’re comfortable.”

  “I thought we were,” Donovan murmured thoughtfully, “but I’ll try to make tonight fun and relaxing. Does she like baths?”

  Miikka frowned. “This, I don’t know.”

  “Hmm. Okay. I’ll order dinner after practice, we can stop and pick up flowers, and maybe a piece of jewelry? Something small but significant.”

  “If the marriage isn’t real, why are you working so hard to make tonight special?”

  Donovan stared straight ahead. This was a doozy of a question. He’d been asking himself the same thing for a couple of days. Why was it so important to him to be better at being married this time, despite the circumstances?

  “Because I wasn’t a great husband the first time,” he admitted, “and even though this isn’t a traditional marriage, I’d like to think I’ve grown and matured since then. So if it doesn’t work out, at least I can say I genuinely tried.”

  “Then why all the secrecy?” Miikka asked. “I thought she wanted this for your sake, not to complicate your life.”

  “Is that what she told you?”

  “She tells me very little,” he said slowly. “Which isn’t like her. We’re close, but she’s not talking to me like she normally does so it worries me. But that’s my impression, that she’s trying to protect you in all of this.”

  “I don’t need protecting,” Donovan said.

  “Exactly.” He was thoughtful for a few seconds. “I understand you’ve done this as a favor to her, but I have a small favor to ask. For me.”

  “Sure.” Donovan had no idea what Miikka might want but there wasn’t much he wouldn’t do for his new brother-in-law.