Lost and Found: Sara Martin Series

by Danelle Helget

  “Okay, okay!” Derek took a deep breath and let it out. “Well, after we found Lily's body at Jake's construction site, it gave us all reason to believe that he was either responsible or involved. That, along with all the other stuff, like the affair, he being one of the last to see her alive, the blood where he'd just vacationed with her, the finger prints and fibers in the car, and on and on. That was enough to bring him in. Same was true for Mark. We held them both in separate cells, all afternoon and evening. After you identified the body, we started questioning them separately. Mark too had asked for a lawyer, which slowed down the process a lot. However the exhaustion kicked in and Mark was the first to confess.”

  “What? Confess? He killed her?” I asked with a gasp, covering my mouth and shaking my head. I didn't believe it. No way he'd kill her. He couldn't have!

  “Not exactly. I'll get to that. Jake then confessed to his part after I told him that Mark had told us the whole story. The stories matched to a tee, and we had no reason to think that they would be lying so they both remain under arrest.”

  “Oh, my gosh! So what's the story? Who killed her? Who did this?”

  28

  She did. Lily killed herself. ”What? Suicide? Why? Why wouldn't they just tell me then, or go to the police?” I stammered, all panicky, not believing any of it.

  “No, it wasn't suicide,” Derek corrected. “It was an accident. When you were sleeping, Mark and Lily had gone on that walk. They walked up to the cave. When they got up there, Lily told Mark that she wanted to be done, that she was breaking up with him. Mark was shocked and upset, said no and suggested a counselor or therapist. Lily told him she wasn't interested in ever being with him and that she didn't love him. He was naturally angry but said that they should try to work on it. That's when she told him she was cheating on him. He walked up to her and slapped her across the face and told her to stop lying. She got pissed and stepped back. She was close to the edge of the cliff and told him she was worthless and stupid and should just jump. He grabbed her by the arm and yanked her back from the edge. Hard. All this left a big hand print on her face and bruise on her arm. He felt horrible and said he was sorry. He admitted that in anger, he grabbed her really hard. Lily then stood up and again walked up to the top of the cave. He continued to apologize and asked her for forgiveness. He asked her to give it time, told her that he really loved her and he could forgive her.”

  I nodded, crying. He really did love her.

  “That's when he stepped up there, to the highest point, with her and said that they'd get through this together. She turned to him and said it was Jake. She told Mark she was cheating on him with his best friend, with her best friend's husband. She asked him if he could forgive that? Then she turned to walk away, and she slipped and fell. She fell down the opposite side of the cave entrance. There’s a ten-foot-drop on the lake side of that hill, to a flat spot down below. It's almost impossible to see from above because of the overhang and the foliage. We sent a uniform out there, and he confirmed it. He brought back pictures and and blood samples early this morning, and it was a match. When she fell, she split her head and bled out in moments. Mark tried to grab her, but it was too late. He ran back to get Jake, and he and Jake pulled her up together. After seeing the blood and realizing she was dead, Mark panicked. He thought because his hand print was on her face and arm that everyone would think he pushed her and killed her. He got scared and convinced Jake that hiding the body would be the best for everyone. Jake was not thinking clearly either because Mark had told Jake that it could easily look like Jake did it since he was having the affair. So, after much stupid deliberation, Jake agreed, saying he felt like he was being threatened, that if he didn't help, he’d be blamed for it all. Mark noticed the cave opening, and they put her body in there until they could figure out what to do. Then they came back to the cabin, came up with the story about her taking off in the car because she was mad. Then they drove her car about a half mile down the road and parked it there, out of your sight. They got back and were talking by the Jeep, when you woke up. They told you their version of the story, and then you guys left.”

  I was still hand to mouth in disbelief, tears running down my face and my head involuntarily shaking.

  “That night, after you dropped Jake and Mark off, they went back to the cabin, got her body out of the cave. They put her in the car's trunk and then drove it back to the construction site. There, they mixed up fifteen bags of cement and put her under it. The next day, Jake told his employee he did it to help the guys stay on schedule. The employee, Scott, who we interviewed at the site, was the one who came forward later and said something seemed off. He also thought it was strange that Jake was back from vacation so early. When Jake was not acting like himself and Scott learned more about the investigation, he got a bad feeling and came to see me.”

  Derek took a deep breath, then continued. “After they buried her body, Mark followed Jake back to the cabin. Jake remembered the depth finder on the pontoon reading a really deep spot, on the edge of the lake, when they were out there fishing. He said that usually the deep spots in lakes were in the middle. He thought it was weird and thought about it again when Mark asked what they should do with the car. When they got to the lake they found a back road fairly close to the spot. The woods were not as thick there, and they figured they could make it through. They did get stuck a few times but eventually made it. They pushed it over the edge and crossed their fingers. When they saw it go under they thought that was the end of it. But the two old guys in the boat could see its shadow and picked it up on their depth finder too. Turns out they missed the drop off by about ten yards. Mark and Jake drove back home together that same night and agreed never to tell anyone.”

  I still had my hand over my mouth, and my eyes bulged out of my head. I couldn't believe this. “So it was an accident that they stupidly turned into a crime?” I asked, shocked. “It must have been so scary for them. But still, they’re so dumb!” I almost felt sorry for the poor bastards. “Geez, what were they thinking? They should have just told me. They should have called for help.”

  “They weren't thinking. Some people panic in the midst of tragedy, and some can't differentiate right from wrong. They get crippled from the anxiety and adrenaline and turn a simple situation into a totally complicated one. They get so deep into mistakes that they can't see a way out. A lot of murder-suicides start out as accidents.”

  “I can't believe this is happening,” I said, crying. “My three closest friends went from greatest, most important people in my life, to dead and criminal, overnight. I feel so alone.” I sobbed for a few more minutes. Derek stayed quiet and let me cry. He reached out and put his hand on my back.

  “I think that God has a plan for everyone,” he said, softly. “I don't know why he would put you through this, but I think that everything happens for a reason. It's really hard to think about what those reasons are right now, but I just know that you’re a child of God and that He will get you through this. And your life will be better because you went through this. For some reason, God needed you in this. I think Lily’s in a better place, and Jake and Mark will come out okay in the end.” Derek said.

  I looked down at the floor. He was probably right, but it was hard to think like that when you're mad about the situation. I had faith in God. It was just I wished He was here so I could talk to Him face to face and clear a few things up. I slowly raised my eyes to Derek and forced a half smile.

  “Sorry, I don't mean to go all churchy on you. That's just how I feel, and I wanted you to know that,” he said sweetly. He was so confident. I loved it. He didn't care what I thought, nor did he even know if I was a believer. He just said what he thought. It seemed so easy for him to open up.

  “Thank you. I needed to hear that. It's just hard to stay focused on what He would want in your life when you get so busy living it your way.” I looked up and saw the corners of his mouth turn up a little.

  “There's more,” he said
as his face changed back to serious.

  “There's more?” I responded a bit surprised. “Is it bad? I don't know if I can take anymore.”

  “It's not bad . . . per say,” he said, as the corner of his mouth twisted. He waited, looking into my eyes. I was scared of what he was going to say. He turned toward me, and looked serious. “Sara, it's about your dreams.”

  “What?” I whispered weakly. I had kinda forgotten about my dreams.

  “When Mark finally broke and told us what happened to Lily, he was really upset. He was crying really hard and completely came apart. It was actually really hard to watch. He really loved her, and it showed. When he was done giving us the details on Lily, he made another confession.”

  “What? Confession to what?”

  29

  The ghost you've been seeing in your dreams is an old friend of his.” “What? Who?”

  “As it turns out, the little girl, Carrie Sanders, was Mark's childhood friend.”

  “The boy that saw her alive last? The one questioned and released,” I asked, starting to panic. “That was Mark?”

  “Yup,” Derek said. “He told us about what happened to her,” he continued shaking his head. “It's so crazy. It was like deja-vu for poor Mark.”

  “Derek tell me!” I said turning toward him and pulling one foot under my leg.

  “Mark said that he and Carrie had been friends for about four years. They were the only kids from their school who lived on the lake so they spent a lot of time together after school and in the summer. Mark told us that on the afternoon Carrie disappeared, they had hung around the lake and were up by the cave. They often walked there and hung out and talked. The two of them used to sneak cigarettes and beer from their parents and sit up there all afternoon. On that particular afternoon, they ended up having sex. It was the first time for both of them. They were only thirteen, and both were really scared about anyone finding out. They promised each other not to tell anyone. Especially their parents. Mark said that when they got up to get dressed, Carrie was jumping into her jeans, hopping with one leg in and lost her balance. He had just reached down to grab his t-shirt, heard a short scream and looked up to see her fall. Carrie simply slipped, fell, hit her head and died instantly, a foot away from him. His was in complete shock. He bent over to see if she was okay but she didn't move. He couldn't believe it. She was fine one second and dead the next. He tried to do CPR, but it didn't work. Mark said that he was scared of her dad. He feared what would happen if her dad found out about the two of them having sex. He knew that if he went for help, the doctors would see that they'd been together, and her parents and his would hate him . . . maybe worse. He’d be the town's hated boy. Everyone would think it was his fault, and he was scared he'd go to prison for the rest of his life. Not to mention what his parents would do. He was a terrified little boy, so he panicked and hid her body in the cave. And the next day, he came back and buried her in a shallow grave he'd dug in there. The one the search dog found.”

  “Holy shit! Oh, my gosh, Derek! And he never told anyone before you?” I asked.

  “No, he said that he has never told anyone! It's been eating at him his whole life. He was actually relieved to get it off his chest. He cried and said it’s haunted him every single day of his life.”

  “I don't know how to process all this. It's too much. I can't even imagine going through that . . . twice. I feel bad for him, kinda.” I said, still crying. “Actually, I'm not sure how to feel about Mark right now.”

  “I know. I feel sorry for him, too,” Derek said, rubbing my arm. “He seems like a really nice guy who’s really had bad luck and no self-control in a crisis situation. Mark said his dad got a job transfer shortly after it happened, and that's when they moved to the cities. That's when he met all of you guys. He never told you because he was a scared little kid. He really needed a friend, and he got three great ones. He feels really bad that he brought all of you guys into this. Mark said that he was really uncomfortable when you told him and Lily about the cabin you had rented. He knew it would be near there. He didn't realize it was the same lake until you gave him the directions. Mark said he felt sick to his stomach the whole time.”

  “He must have been so scared. I can't imagine what it must have been like for him to go back there.” I had to stop talking and catch my breath. “I didn't tell him exactly where we were going. I just said that I made reservations for a small cabin in the woods on a lake up north. I feel awful.”

  “Don't, Sara. You had no way of knowing. You did nothing wrong,” Derek said compassionately.

  “For him to find out that Lily didn't love him, and then to lose her . . . in the same tragic way . . . in the same exact spot.” I cried hard again for a few minutes. Then I looked up at Derek and took a breath. “Do you believe him?” I asked.

  “Yes,” Derek said softly. “I do, and the investigation proves it. All the facts and evidence are there. Mark's very remorseful. And he already said he'd plead guilty and do his time.”

  “What are they being charged with?” I asked.

  “Mark will be charged with involuntary manslaughter, and Jake will be charged as an accessory. If they plead guilty, the time should go way down. And they can get out early for good behavior, too. But ultimately it will be up to the judge and jury.”

  “What about Carrie Sanders?”

  “Mark would normally be tried separately for that, his sentencing would be separate and so would the judge and jury. But he was a child when it happened, so I don't think they’ll do much about it now. It’ll be up to the district attorney to decide to try the case or not. Carrie's parents have options too, though I doubt at this point they’ll press charges.”

  “Have you told Carrie's parents yet?”

  “No. I have to go up there later today,” he said. He didn't look excited about it either. “I’m going home to sleep, and then I’ll head up there this evening . . . if you want, you can ride along. You wouldn't have to come with to tell her parents. I could drop you at a restaurant and meet back up with you,” he said, with those puppy dog eyes.

  “Can I think about it?” I asked, not really liking the sound of it.

  “Sure. I'll call you an hour before I leave, and you can let me know,” he said.

  “You've just been through a lot. It might be best for you to stay here and rest anyway. I just thought it’d make the long, boring, drive nicer if you were with me.” He moved closer and slung an arm over my shoulder. I put my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. They hurt. I needed eye drops. I didn't want to even think about what I looked like.

  Derek sat back and put his feet up on the table. I snuggled in and enjoy his warmth and delicious smell. It was so nice to have him, such a nice guy and so strong inside and out. I closed my eyes slowly, and inhaled deeply.

  I opened my eyes because my neck hurt and noticed on the clock across the room, it'd been an hour. I slowly picked my head up and saw Derek was sound asleep. I carefully got up and grabbed a blanket from the closet and covered him up with it. He sank a little lower into the couch. He looked comfortable so I didn't wake him. I turned the radio and the lights off and pulled the blinds on the patio door.

  I went to my computer and checked emails. None from Jake. Guess he'd been busy. It made me sick to replay in my mind my conversations and interaction with him. I was glad I kicked him out right away. There were so many nights when I just wanted him to come home and hold me. I couldn't believe that he'd helped Mark. What was he thinking? Then again, what was he thinking when he cheated on me? I thought I knew him. I thought my heart was safe with him.

  Mark too, I was there for him! I even cleaned his apartment! I couldn't believe he'd never told me. All that time I spent talking to him, and checking in on him, not knowing all the while he was hiding my ex-best friend's body in the cement of my soon to be ex-husband’s construction site. I guess you never really know a person. I grew up with him, all of them! I spent time almost every, single day of my life with
them. I told them all my secrets. I trusted them . . . I trusted them! How do I ever trust anyone again after this. Leaning back from my desk, the tears rolled down my cheeks full speed, I didn't even feel them coming. I was numb. There were so many emotions to feel that I didn't know what to feel.

  I stood and looked over at Derek on the couch. He was still sound asleep. So handsome, even when he was sleeping. The sight looked very inviting. If the couch were bigger, I'd have crawled right up there with him. I went to my bedroom and grabbed two pillows off the bed and another blanket from the closet. I put one pillow next to Derek's head. He moved a little and slowly opened his eyes.

  “Pillow?” I whispered. He lifted his head, and I tucked it under. “You fell asleep, but it's okay, I'm going to lay down by the fire and take a nap, too.” He nodded and smiled. I made myself a little bed on the floor in front of the fireplace. I saw Derek pull his feet up on the couch and settled in. I set my cell phone alarm for two hours and closed my eyes.

  It was misty, and cool. I was at the cave entrance. It was rocky but clean looking. It's as if someone swept it and bleached it. It glistened in the early morning sun. I look up into the sun, and there are two shadows, two ghosts. Lily and Carrie in white dresses and glowing.

  “You helped us. You did it!” Carrie said.

  “Thank-you,” Lily said.

  It was strange to hear her voice. It sounded just like her. I missed her, but I still hated her, too. “I'm sorry,” she said. “So sorry.”

  I looked at her and didn't know what to say. I was angry and sad and hurt. She smiled gently. They both started to fade, the glow was disappearing. The mist they seemed to be made of getting thinner and thinner. I watched until they were completely out of sight.

  I felt a thousand pounds lighter. I could breathe! I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. I was awake! My cell phone alarm was going off. While turning it off, I glanced at Derek. He was lying there with his eyes open and a small grin on his face.