Pretty Fin

by Smokey Moment

  “Fin,” Lark called out, as he knocked and then entered. Fin was not responding. And it instantly caused him alarm. “Fin,” he repeated, as he slowly walked to her bed. Fin moaned and turned on her side. Lark watched her. She was as beautiful as ever. He wondered if she had plans to reunite with the man who obviously had her heart. He hoped she would wait. Think it through. He could make her happy. She never gave him the chance. Lark was certain Zander would approve. He had asked him if he loved Fin. Because he already knew the answer.

  “Fin,” he said again, in a low tone. Finora opened her eyes. She blinked quickly as she tried to focus on his face. The strong herbs that the healer had her taking, had her groggy. Fin cleared her eyes. She stared at him. Her eyes, filling with tears. “Go away,” she mumbled, as she turned from him. She could see he loved her. It was in his eyes. And she loved him. But they could never be. He could never replace her love. Her king.

  Lark reminded her of Lance. They were both handsome, strong, wonderfully built men with powerful sex appeal and magnetic eyes. But Lark wasn’t Lance. There was no comparison. Lance was her heart. No one could take his place. Not even the one man who loved her all her life.

  “I’m sorry about the baby,” he said, as he stood over her. “Please Lark. Not now. I can’t talk about it,” Fin said, as she sobbed in her pillow. Lark looked away. He couldn’t leave. He had something else to say. Something he held inside. Feelings that were now resurfacing.

  “Can we talk. I have something to say,” he asked. Fin wiped her eyes, then hesitated. She sat up. This was Lark. The man who searched the sea for her. The man that saved her. Their history warranted more. She owed him to at least listen to his words. What had happened was not his fault even though Fin blamed everyone out of anger. Her pain had her mad at the world. “What is it?” she asked.

  “I’ve been waiting for months for you to get better. So I could tell you that I care for you. I know you have feelings for someone else. But I’m here. I’ve always been here Fin,” he said. Fin shook her head slowly. She knew as much. Theirs was a love that dated back to their childhood. This was tough. It was the hardest thing she ever needed to do. The words would rip into his heart. She paused as she thought of what to say, then looked him deeply in his eyes.

  “I could never love anyone the way I love him. I have to return. I have a child. I miss my family. When I am well, I plan on returning. Please understand,” she said. Lark didn’t understand. “Is it Arfusei?” he asked. Fin chuckled.

  “No. And besides Arfusei loves Lillia. No…The man I love, doesn’t live here. One day when I am well, I will show you something. I am only showing you because you will be king. And as king, you need to know every corner of the land. But it is not safe for our kind. It is a world that is harsh and unfriendly to outsiders. They will capture and hold anything that doesn’t belong. Not out of spite. But out of safety for their own kind. I have to stay hidden when I go back. Away from their prying eyes. So, you must promise me you will not share the location with anyone,” she said. Lark was confused. But he agreed anyway. He wasn’t sure what she meant.

  “Of course Fin. But I don’t understand. What do you mean somewhere else?” he said. “He lives through the dunes. Through the lair. Another place. A place you have never seen nor could ever imagine. It is forbidden. And you must promise not to show anyone. Promise me?” she demanded. “I promise.”

  Fin told Lark about the lair. And the world on the other side. Lark didn’t like the world she was describing. It sounded harsh. Critical. Unconnected. And violent. He was sure he would never tell anyone. It was a world where the people took what they wanted. They would consider Madaka part of their property. The ocean was theirs and so anything in it was fair game. Fin assured him that they would come for the treasures. That the items were rare and valuable. And if they knew Madaka had them in abundance, it would cause many treasure seekers to find a way into their world. And they had the weapons and possibly the means to do so.

  “That is unbelievable. I just can’t see why you would want to live there,” he said. Fin smiled. “For them. For my family. Not for me. I love Madaka.”

  13

  The Power of Love

  “You’re almost there.,” Lark encouraged, as he helped Fin through the garden. Her feet hadn’t healed properly. And as a result, she had trouble getting around. She was afraid to get in the water and see what her tail and fin looked like. She was sure it was worse. It was probably ravaged. And swimming would probably be a chore.

  She tried every remedy and homemade solution on her legs and feet. Items given to her by other nermeins who had also damaged their tails. But Fin was different. Her bloodline included too much human DNA for the remedies to work. Her Fin was permanently damaged. And she had settled on a life at the castle. She could not get back to Lance. The human part of her that made tolerating the gases possible, was the same part that made healing from such damage to her body, nearly impossible.

  Lark helped her to a chair. A handmade wood bench she designed, and he made for her. Lark was secretly overjoyed. He kept his delight from her. He was sure Fin would be angered at his happiness over her immobility. That he was glad she could not get to her lover. Lark wanted to make love to her. It was a new discovery. Many children were being born. Madaka was growing at a rapid rate. As the nermeins were released from the powers that kept them in the dark, they discovered they were sexual beings. They became more body conscience. They were attracted to one another. Fin hoped there would be no rise in infidelity with the new sexual appetites that their people found themselves preoccupied with. Lark had heard about it. And he was anxious to get closer to Fin.

  Fin was starting to look at him as a possible mate. She had begun to imagine a life without Lance. Without her daughter. She found comfort in knowing that her baby was with the best father on the planet. She missed Isla. And she was brokenhearted at the love she lost with Lance. But the pain of her loss caused her to send mixed signals. And Lark had become frustrated.

  “You are quiet today,” Lark said. Fin looked out at the ocean. She stared out at the water. She seemed agitated at the light breeze. Lark tried to keep neutral. He walked on eggshells with her. Fin was starting to pull away from conversations about a future with him again. And she desperately wanted him to move on. “Yeah. I’m ok,” she softly replied. Fin wanted to be alone. And she would get her wish. Lark had something to do. He would be gone most of the day.

  Flashed of darkness and faces of men entered Fin’s dream. She tossed and turned, moaning as she fought back the tension of a nightmare. Fin kicked her cover off then suddenly awoke. She was in a cold sweat. She bolted up. She grabbed her chest. Her heart was beating at a quick pace. Fin caught her breath. “I need water,” she said. She opened her door. Her personal guard immediately stood up. He wiped his tired eyes. “You need something Your Highness,” he said. “No. Stay here. Everything is fine. I just want a glass of water,” Fin said.

  The soldier sat back down. He was tired. He slowly drifted back to sleep. Fin looked back at him. She turned and walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. She tried to be quiet. Lillia’s room was near the kitchen. She drank the water then looked around. Her foot was sore. She still had a slight limp. She was glad that the pain was slight. Her foot was healing and her walking had improved.

  Fin stood at her pantry. She wiped a tear then shook her head in disbelief. Isla would be turning two soon. She was having a nervous breakdown. “I can’t…I can’t do this,” she cried, as she tried talking herself out of the idea, of trying to get to Malibu. Fin covered her mouth and cried into her hand. She was out of control.

  I’m coming baby. I’m not missing anymore birthdays, she thought, as she slowly walked to the door and opened it. She could see two guards laughing. Fin closed the door back and decided to leave out the back door. She walked through the pantry and out the back door. A guard stood leaning against the wall. His eyes closed. Fin closed the door halfway and walked quietly through t
he grass. She looked back at him as she got further away.

  She took off running for the cliff. The same sprint she ran as a six-year-old, frustrated and anxious child. Fin stopped at the cliffs edge. The sea was turbulent. The waves crashed along the bottom rock. Fin looked back. She took a deep breath. She hadn’t seen her tail in over a year. The last time she tried to change she was devastated with the condition of the fin and vowed to never try again.

  “Okay. This is it,” she said, as she leaped. Fin hit the dark waters. She used her arms to float vertically while she overcame her anxiety and changed her legs to her tail. Fin swam using her legs then changed into her tail. “Noooo,” she said, at the sight of her tail. It was worse than she imagined. Her fin was torn in many places and the tail had gashes and chunks of flesh missing. Fin was saddened at the sight. It was a devastating blow. Her beautiful and unique tail unrecognizable. The damage rendering it useless. Fin struggled to move through the water although it was not impossible.

  “I can do this,” she said, as she empowered herself. Fin took longer than anticipated to reach the dunes. She worried about spending such a long time over the gases. It was a swim that she always did quickly, to keep from having too much exposure to the gases. “I can do this,” she repeated, as she prepared herself.

  Fin took a few breaths, then held it and started across the hot and gaseous area. She could tell she was taking too long and her body was not in the same shape. She struggled to continue holding her breath and released the water, then took in a breath of the gas and oxygen mixed water. Fin continued on. She didn’t feel herself becoming ill. “Just a little more and I’m there,” she said, as she took small shallow breaths hoping it made a difference.

  The lair was close. She could see the opening. But her tail was ineffective. Fin decided to change back to her legs. She hoped her legs would propel her better and faster. She hadn’t used them very often. But she was willing to try anything.

  She made it to the lair and swam up. It was heavily concentrated with trapped gas. Fin felt herself getting nauseated. She panicked. She tried to speed up. Soon she felt herself losing her momentum. “Oh no! Please! Help me,” she said, as she faded in and out of consciousness. Fin stopped and held onto the rock. She tried pulling herself up and out. But it was too late. The extreme environment had no oxygen. And her slow movements had her in its toxic water too long. Fin was losing her reserve. She held onto the rock, unable to move, as her oxygen levels continued to deplete. Fin managed to climb three more meters before coming to another rest. Her breathing shallow and labored. I can’t die here. Alone. No one will know I’m here, she thought, as she pulled herself up a meter more. Fin was determined to get through. She had to.

  T

  raffic was congested. Lance was on his way to Tot Time Daycare. He had just finished for the day and left his office early after hearing a voice message left by Isla’s aide, Brigitte. The voice message stated that Isla had a rough day. That she had stated she wanted her mother. Lance was surprised. She had not called out for Fin in months. They both had a rough couple of years since Fin had left. Lance was convinced she was dead. He was certain that there was no way she would voluntarily stay away from her husband and her child. She was going to train her men on how to fight, select someone to run the city and return. But his worst nightmare had come true. He hated to interfere with Fin’s plans but this was exactly what he thought would happen. A war with true, hand to hand combat, was a man’s fight. And now he and his baby girl, were living life without the woman they loved. It was a major adjustment. And Isla had come a long way.

  She seemed to be doing fine. But today was a setback. He wondered what triggered it. Possibly the picture of a mermaid. Or perhaps a television program. Maybe a cartoon. One about an undersea world. One that included mermaids.

  “Today was not a good day. She cried a lot. She repeatedly asked for her mom. We tried calling you,” Brigitte said, as Lance walked through the door. Brigitte took a special interest in the single dad and his beautiful daughter. Lance was handsome. He was charming. His child was gorgeous. She was the little girl whose looks were television worthy. A reputation noted when a photo of her went viral. A photo one of the teachers took when the class made pottery, and posted it. A director interested in putting the child in a movie contacted Brigitte. And when she mentioned it to Lance, his response was anything but pleasant.

  The incident was behind them now. And Brigitte removed all photos of her class from her account. She was horrified at his reaction. The look on his face. She thought he would jump at the chance to put his child in pictures. Over time she could see she was wrong. Lance was a man who liked life simple. And he was wealthy enough not to chase the trappings of Hollywood. He looked like a star himself. And Brigitte was interested in him. And it helped that she adored Isla.

  “How is she now?” he asked, as he looked over her shoulder. Isla’s classroom was right behind her. “She’s fine. She took a nap. And we just had snack time. She just needed a little extra attention,” she replied. Lance smiled. He was relieved. He was on the fence about whether he should pull her from the childcare center. It was convenient and it was a well ran children’s center. A sophisticated facility down the street from his office. Equipped with an indoor playground, state of the art amenities and some of the best teachers one could ask for. The owners were child psychologist with PhD’s in child development and behavioral studies. But Isla was sensitive. She was an emotional child. And she was still very young. Lance thought of hiring a nanny. It was all overwhelming.

  “Listen…I know you worry about her. She is fine. Sometimes children who lose a parent will have moments of emotional breakdown. They mourn differently. And different things can trigger a thought. A feeling. She will be fine,” Brigitte said, as she touched his shoulder. “Thanks,” he said. Lance could see Brigitte was interested. She had shown him on several occasions and was not shy about it. She was beautiful. She looked more like a fashion model than the licensed child psychiatrist that she was. She was brilliant, smart, outspoken and aggressive. Everything he liked in a woman. She just wasn’t Fin.

  “Were you still thinking of pulling her out of Tiny Tots?” she asked. She hoped not. Isla needed other children. It would help in her development. “I don’t know. I will think about what to do,” he replied. Bridgette smiled. “Well. You have options. Let me know if I can be of help,” she said.

  “Daddy,” Isla shouted, as she ran to her father. She displayed no sign of having had a rough day. If she did, he would never see it. She always perked up whenever her father entered the room. “Baby girl,” he said, as he reached down and picked her up. “Did you tell your teacher your birthday is in a few days?” he asked. Isla blushed, then buried her head in her father’s neck. “Oh wow Issie! We’ll have cupcakes and ice cream,” Brigitte exclaimed.

  “Go get your things,” Lance said, as he put her down. Isla raced off, another child running right behind her. Lance sighed. He couldn’t really imagine pulling her from the daycare center. It was really the best thing for her. “She’ll be alright. I know you worry. It has to be hard being a single dad,” Brigitte said. Isla ran to her cubby and grabbed her mini bookbag and her sweater. Lance was proud of her. She was smart. Brave like her mother. And mature. She seemed to have an innate sense of what their life entailed. She stopped showing him how much her heart ached for Fin. As if she wanted to cheer him up instead of the other way around. But Lance knew better. She too, missed Fin immensely.

  Lance walked through the door as Isla ran through the hall into the great room. He followed her in and turned on the television. Isla danced in anticipation of The Little Mermaids. “Okay. Okay,” he said, as he tried to find the channel. She was excited. Soon the familiar songs and characters were on the screen. Isla looked back at her father. He was her hero. He knew exactly how to soothe her broken heart. And her huge smile was enough for him.

  The sun was setting. Lance chuckled as Isla wiggled her small frame from
side to side. The music from the mermaid cartoon had her in her element. She loved to dance and join in, as the characters asked questions of the audience. Lance walked to the open kitchen and picked up his cell phone. He was in no mood to cook. He planned on ordering take out for Isla and himself.

  “Issie. How about burgers?” he asked. Isla didn’t respond, as she danced and turned in circles. “Iss. You hear me? What about burgers sweetheart?” he repeated. “Uhuh,” she said, as she followed along with the moves of the mermaids. Lance placed his order online and typed in his credit card. He tossed the phone on the table and laid down across the couch. He was tired. It had been a long day. This was the first chance he had to relax. And Isla was fine.

  T

  he sound of an infomercial awakened Lance from a long nap. Isla lay on the couch next to him. He looked at his watch. He missed the delivery of food. Lance sighed. He couldn’t believe he was so tired that he slept through the man knocking at his door. Isla had already eaten earlier at the daycare. Lance figured she wasn’t that hungry. She had a small appetite and he didn’t think she would have eaten much of her burger. But he was hungry. He hadn’t eaten since lunch. Lance sighed. He eased off the couch and stretched. He reached down and slowly picked Isla up.

  “Umm,” Isla uttered, as her father carried her up the stairs. He walked to her room and over to her bed. She had a bed fit for a princess. A custom-made chariot complete with two wood carved horses and all the accessories to make her fantasy a reality. The massive sized bedroom set had to be shipped in from Italy. Lance went above and beyond to have it made. She was a princess. The real-life daughter of a queen of the ocean.

  He would have to explain it all to her someday. But she would have a head start. The book created for him by his psychologist Helen Karpowski, was written to keep her story alive. To keep Fin in Isla’s thoughts. Lance was forever grateful to Helen. She took his story and with his permission, wrote a children’s book. Lance didn’t mind. It was perfect for Isla. And with Allan drawing the likeness of Fin on the inside page, the book had much more meaning for him.