Debra Webb - In His Touch Box Set (Here To Stay, Up Close, Tempting Trace, Basic Instincts)

by Debra Webb

  “You should call him,” Shelley said with a nod. “Just call him up and say you need to talk.” She fixed Meredith with an urgent look. “Don’t let him find out some other way. You have to tell him now!”

  Meredith stood and tightened the sash of her robe. “You’re right. I’ll give him a call and make a date for lunch.” She nodded once. “And then I’ll tell him.”

  Shelley’s usual bright smile returned. “All right then. I have this feeling that everything’s going to be fine.” She winked conspiratorially. “I think I hear wedding bells already,” she teased.

  Meredith had to laugh at that. “I don’t think we’ve reached that point just yet.”

  Shelley raised a speculative eyebrow. “You did say you’d had unprotected sex at least twice, didn’t you?”

  Meredith’s skin heated with the memory. She offered a halfhearted shrug. “Things kind of got out of control and we...”

  “Yes or no?” Shelley asked pointedly.

  “Yes. It was stupid, I know.” Meredith threw her hands up in frustration. “I, of all people, know how important practicing safe sex is.”

  “Let’s just hope that there isn’t already another aspect to your dilemma. The Pill has been known to fail.”

  Shelley was right. What if? The idea of carrying Jake’s child warmed her to the very core of her being. But... there was a lot to be done in order to straighten out the mess she had made. And if Jake didn’t want to understand—well, she would just have to live with the consequences of his decision and their unprotected act.

  “I should make that call now.”

  The doorbell sounded, startling them both. Shelley laughed at their wired nerves. “You make the call, I’ll get the door.”

  Meredith nodded and went in search of her cell. Telling Jake the truth was the right thing to do. She loved him and if he loved her enough, maybe, just maybe, they could work this out.

  “Jake! What a surprise!”

  Meredith turned to see him standing in the doorway, his expression as unyielding as stone.

  He knew.

  She didn’t have to ask. She could feel his emotional withdrawal all the way across the room. Meredith was aware of moving toward him, but she had no clue how her body had been set in motion.

  “Well, I’ll just leave you two alone.” Shelley shot a worried look at her.

  “It’s okay,” Meredith assured her.

  Shelley squeezed her friend’s arm as she passed. “Let me know if you need me.”

  “Hello, Jake.” Meredith wrapped her arms around her middle in an effort to hide her trembling.

  He held out a copy of her book. She took the damned thing in her hands. The unforgiving look on the face that had become so dear to her shattered her heart. There would be no resolution. His mind was already made up. She could see it in his eyes, read it in his posture. Jake would never forgive her deception. Selfishly, she took a moment to look at the man who would never want her love now. The handsome face, the eyes that made her melt inside with just a glance, and the body that made her ache to be held.

  “I just want to know one thing,” he said, his voice low, harsh, filled with the pain she had caused. “Why me?”

  Meredith squared her shoulders and made a pathetic attempt to smile. “Please come in, so I can explain.” Her voice was shaky and faint, but it was the best she could do under the circumstances.

  He shook his head, the movement barely perceptible. “I don’t think so.” Renewed fury blazed in his eyes. “You—” He closed his eyes briefly, visibly shaken.

  “Jake, please give me a chance to explain.” She reached out to him, but he backed away.

  “There’s nothing to talk about. You got what you came here for, you can go back to wherever it is you came from.” His mouth worked as if he wanted to say something else but couldn’t form the words.

  “Goodbye, Merri.”

  He turned and walked away.

  Chapter Ten

  “You’re overreacting and you know it,” Dan argued vehemently. “Merri loves you, Jake; Suzy said so. And she’s not wrong.”

  Jake nailed him with a drop-dead glare. “Her name is Meredith. Dr. Meredith Langston. And she was using me for research.”

  Dan shook his head. “You’re wrong.” He followed Jake around the plywood floor of the newly constructed house. “I mean, maybe it started out that way, but—”

  “Go home to Suzy and Danielle. You’re not supposed to be back here for another two weeks.”

  “Suzy made me leave; she said I was hovering. She needed some space.”

  Jake almost smiled at that, but with his own life in shambles, he couldn’t think about anyone else’s ups and downs at the moment. Besides, nothing Dan could say would alleviate the crushing misery Jake felt. For the first time since he was ten years old, he wanted to cry. Damn. A grown man wasn’t supposed to feel that way, but he did. He wanted to cuss and rip something apart, then he just wanted to drop his head and howl with the hurt twisting inside him. The only way he could figure he would get over the whole humiliating mess was to stay busy and not think about her. He couldn’t call her Meredith, because to him she would always be Merri. The woman who wrecked any semblance of control he’d ever possessed over his own destiny.

  Now he just wanted to be left alone.

  Dan blew out a breath of frustration. “She’s leaving today. Her flight’s in two hours.”

  Jake wanted to say he was glad she was going, but that would be a lie. So, instead, he set to work the old-fashioned way, with a hammer and nails. Using a nail gun wouldn’t help him get rid of the emotions screaming inside him. He needed hard, manual labor.

  “You have to hear me out,” Dan insisted.

  Losing his patience very quickly, Jake stopped. He just barely restrained his temper before turning to face his nagging buddy once more. “I didn’t want to hear it from her when she offered to explain yesterday. Why would I want to hear from you today?”

  “Because you’re a hardheaded jerk and I’m about to save you from yourself,” Dan told him bluntly.

  Jake swiped the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand and relented. “All right. Get it over with so you can go away and leave me the hell alone.” But he didn’t really want to hear this now. In fact, he’d had a whole speech planned for when he confronted Merri. He intended to give her hell about her deliberate deception and the way she’d used him. He’d planned to tell her exactly what he thought about it all. But he couldn’t. He simply couldn’t say hurtful things to her. He loved her too much.

  But she couldn’t feel anything for him. Otherwise she would never have lied to him by omission, led him to believe she felt something. Jake swore at his own trustfulness. Who would have thought that he could be such a fool?

  “She was desperate. The phenomenal popularity of her first book turned her world upside down. And she didn’t know how else to research her next book, except to get out there on the dating scene herself.” Dan patted the perspiration on his balding head. “Shelley talked her into coming to stay in Atlanta for a couple of weeks. The disguise was Shelley’s idea.”

  “So she says,” Jake countered.

  Dan shook his head. “Actually, Shelley told me she blames herself for pushing Merri into the scam. Can’t you see she didn’t really want to do it? Didn’t you see the signs?”

  Jake scowled. He’d only met Shelley once. She seemed like the impulsive type. Flamboyant. He supposed she could dream up a scheme like this easily enough. And he had seen Merri’s reluctance, more than once. But that still didn’t make it right.

  “Anyway,” Dan continued. “Merri met you on her first night out. And something just clicked. Hey, she even tried to find someone else to prove that what she felt with you wasn’t anything unique.”

  Jealousy assailed Jake, making his gut clench. He gritted his teeth to hold back bitter curses at the thought of Merri with another man.

  Dan smiled, recognizing the emotion on his friend’s face. �
��But no one else made her feel the way you did.” His expression grew somber then. “She said as soon as she realized things were getting too serious, she tried to back off but she just couldn’t do it.”

  Jake remembered the numerous times he’d tried to call Merri and she’d been out, or wouldn’t answer the phone. Maybe she had tried to avoid him. That was still no excuse for not telling the truth.

  “The thought of losing you scared her badly. She was afraid to tell you, for fear of precisely what did happen,” Dan concluded solemnly.

  “You sound like an afternoon talk show host,” Jake said crossly. “And what about that Nigel guy? He looked like he knew her well. Too well.”

  Dan nodded knowingly. “He’s just one more person pressuring Merri to get her second book completed. Nigel is her agent. He only dropped by to find out where she was and how the new book was going.”

  Jake felt a flicker of sympathy, which he ignored. What she’d done was still wrong. He tamped down the emotion rising in his chest. If he’d thought he didn’t know her before, he was certain of it now. What on earth would a New York psychologist have in common with a construction company owner? So what if the sex had been great... okay, better than great. So what if they couldn’t stay away from each other. The reality was that they were essentially strangers, even after all that had happened.

  “You can’t let her go,” Dan urged. “If you don’t patch this up, we’ll never convince Landry we’re not gay.”

  Jake rolled his eyes. He was in no mood for humor.

  “She loves you, Jake. She really does.”

  “Did she tell you that she loves me?”

  “Well.” Dan started backpedaling then. “She didn’t exactly say the words. But I know what I saw in her eyes. The way she talked about you, like you were some kind of god. Trust me, Jake, the woman’s got it bad for you. She’s just afraid that you won’t forgive her.”

  Jake squashed the rush of feelings that threatened to weaken his defenses. “She’s right. I won’t.”

  ~*~

  “You’re sure this is what you want to do?”

  Meredith turned away from her friend so she couldn’t see the truth in her eyes. “Yes. It’s for the best.”

  “That’s absolute crap,” Shelley retorted.

  Meredith blinked, taken aback. “Look, Shelley, this is difficult enough without you turning on me, too.”

  Shelley planted her hands on her hips and glared impatiently. “You look. How often does this kind of head-over-heels love come along?” She shook a finger at Meredith. “I’ll tell you—maybe once in a dozen lifetimes. You just can’t walk away from Jake and what you found together.”

  Meredith sighed and adjusted the purse strap on her shoulder. “I’m not just walking away; he doesn’t want to see me again. I hurt him and he isn’t going to forgive me for it.” She struggled to hold back her brimming tears. “He thinks I used him, and I did. He isn’t interested in working things out. It’s over,” she concluded, her voice sinking with her heart.

  “Arrgh!” Shelley stamped her foot. “You are so out of touch with what’s real. How on earth do you ever counsel people about relationships?”

  The remark stung. “It’s different when I’m analyzing someone else’s life. I have to be objective, not emotionally involved,” she said defensively. “This isn’t the same thing, Shelley. I’m as out of touch with my own needs as the next single female.”

  Shelley lifted her hands in a gesture of surrender. “You’re right, I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.” She studied Meredith for a long moment. “It’s just that I can see how in love the two of you are with each other. You have to give it at least one more try. Isn’t Jake worth the effort? Do you really want to spend the rest of your life wondering if things could have turned out differently had you tried just a little harder?”

  “I have to go.” Meredith gave her friend a hug and then grabbed her bags. “I’ll miss my flight otherwise.”

  Shelley sighed in defeat. “Well, at least let me drive you to the airport.”

  Meredith shook her head. “You’ve done too much for me already. Besides, you have an audition.” She managed a smile for her dear friend. “Go break a leg or something.”

  Shelley rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Or something,” she teased.

  Ten minutes later, Meredith was seated in the backseat of a taxi, her luggage stored in the trunk. She closed her eyes and fought the renewed urge to cry. She was doing the right thing. Jake would be happier with someone else. Someone who wouldn’t spend most of their time deceiving him. Her eyes drifted open and she stared out at the passing landscape. But Meredith knew with certainty that she would never, ever be able to forget Jake. She loved him too much.

  She smiled as memories of the time she and Jake had shared played through her mind. Their first meeting, the intensity of the attraction. She almost laughed as she recalled the accidental meeting in the lingerie shop. And then Dan’s birthday party. The fierce but tender way Jake had made love to her that night. Then the nerve-wracking, yet exciting ride to the hospital. Her heart almost broke as she remembered what happened next. Sharing the birth of little Danielle. The awe in Jake’s eyes as he’d stared down at the newborn. Fainting away at being designated the baby’s godfather.

  She felt a little dizzy remembering their lovemaking in Jake’s big bed. His gentle passion, when she had known it was all he could do to hold back. His complete selflessness when it came to sharing with the people he cared about.

  Jake was one in a million... but she’d lost him, because of her own selfish needs, and fear of losing him. If she’d just told him the truth the night they’d made love, maybe things would have turned out differently. But she hadn’t. She allowed the deception to continue, to destroy his trust. And now it was over.

  Isn’t Jake worth one more try? Do you really want to spend the rest of your life wondering if things could have turned out differently?

  Shelley’s sensible words echoed through Meredith’s head. Her heart fluttered, then pounded. Was she going to let pride stand in the way of giving their relationship one last shot at survival?

  “Excuse me, driver,” Meredith said in a rush before she lost her nerve. “I need you to turn around.” She jerked out her cell phone and called Dan to find out if he knew where Jake might be.

  “I thought you wanted to go to the airport, lady,” the cabby said, confused.

  She smiled at him, her lips trembling with the effort to be brave. “There’s something else I have to do first.”

  ~*~

  Meredith gave the cabby a huge tip and asked him to wait. She opened the door and stepped out into the early evening heat. The sun hovered just above the treetops and the temperature was still smoldering. She quickly surveyed the dozen or so newly constructed houses until she found the one Dan had described.

  Taking a deep breath, Meredith strode across the not-yet-landscaped yard and paused at the steps leading to the porch. What if Jake rejected her again? What if nothing she could say would ever change his mind?

  Pushing away the questions and firming her resolve, Meredith climbed the steps and crossed the narrow porch. The door was wide open, as were the windows, most likely to allow the humid air to flow through. As she entered the unfinished interior, music drifted to her ears, accompanied by the insistent pounding of a hammer. She followed the racket until she found Jake. A small battery-operated radio sat on the floor in one corner of the large room, Jake had his back to her, his attention focused on driving yet another nail into a board.

  Desire overwhelmed her at the sight of him. He’d taken off his shirt, displaying those mile-wide shoulders along with the rest of that awesome torso. Sweat glistened on his tanned skin. Worn, ragged work jeans hugged his well-shaped buttocks and long, lean legs. Meredith licked her lips and tried to swallow, but her throat had gone as dry as the dusty plywood beneath her feet.

  Mesmerized, she simply watched for a time as he reached and bent and swung th
e hammer, muscles flexing and bunching in a way that made her pulse trip. His dark hair was tousled and slightly damp from his exertion in the oppressive heat. And Meredith longed to wipe away the sweat she knew had most likely beaded on his brow. Her pulse fluttered. This was the man she loved. The strong, giving, caring man who had stolen her heart.

  “Jake,” she said at last, knowing she could not wait another single second without looking into those deep, dark eyes.

  He slowly turned around at the sound of Merri’s voice. When his gaze lit on her, his whole body reacted. He ached to run to her and take her into his arms. The look of uncertainty in her blue eyes made him want to hold her until it went away. The blond hair that made her look so angelic spilled over her shoulders, begging to be touched. The conservative button-up dress was longer than what he was accustomed to seeing Merri wear, but she still looked like a long, cool drink to a man dying of thirst.

  “Merri,” he said in response to her tentative greeting. The knowledge that it wasn’t even her name and the fact that he didn’t even really know her hit him all over again. He loved her so much, wanted her more than he wanted to take his next breath. But... what? Jake tried to shake off the crazy, mixed-up emotions that crushed in on him, but failed.

  She moved closer. “I know you don’t want to hear any excuses or explanations, so I’m not going to offer you any.” Another few feet of dusty plywood disappeared between them. “I made a mistake. I set out to use you to help me understand the impulses that drive men and women to mate.”

  He swept his damp hair back and cocked his head. “Is that your roundabout way of apologizing?”

  Merri shook her head. “I’m not apologizing for what I did.” She moistened her lips and looked at him uncertainly. “But I am sorry for misleading you. You didn’t volunteer to be my guinea pig or even know my real identity and that was wrong.” She stood perfectly still in the middle of the room. “I won’t bore you with the struggles I fought with my own conscience for the past two weeks.”