An Innocent Wife

by Richa Resa

  “Damn, why do I get the feeling that you have your mind set on this? I just don’t think you’re ready emotionally!” Nora said in frustration.

  “But she is. She wants this. God, why can’t you just both understand she needs this? She really can’t live with the dead past and memories weighing her down. She suffered a lot, and if she doesn’t try now, how will she move forward with her life? You both hated him, loathed him, and now you’re taking his side. What for? Don’t you remember about what all that happened?” Craig asked, giving me an assuring smile. Nora shook her head, while Clarisse breathed out a sigh.

  “If this is what you want, I’ll help you. But whatever it is you want, I feel like you’re just rushing it, Eunice. I’ll be there for you when you’re over this,” Nora said. I turned to Clarisse, waiting for her answer. She would really help me out in ways of building me again.

  “Well, I don’t think I can stay away from this! Damn, maybe I could come with you and ogle the guys from far away.” She gave me a bright smile before engulfing me into a hug.

  “By the way, have you found anyone yet or have anyone in mind? Any special one you are looking for?” Nora asked, taking a seat beside Craig. “We really don’t want a person you go out with to be a creepy person.”

  “Well, I was hoping if you could all help me on this…I really have no clue, but I have one small request I’ll let you know later on. Just don’t ask me what it is,” I answered hesitantly.

  “I bet we can have Nora go and interview all those suits and Clarisse and I could sneak in some bad guys with tattoos and piercings for you without her knowing,” Craig joked. Nora hit him on the arm, hard. I really wasn’t the girl for bad guys. One experience was enough to ruin all my dreams for a bad boy for me.

  “God, woman, it was a goddamn joke,” Craig said, trying to get away from Nora. He was not successful.

  “Well, don’t joke like that,” Nora said. “And Eunice, we will all help you. If he dares bring some idiot or fool, I get your dad to beat him to shit. Maybe I’ll just make something up to give him a taste of your dad’s fist.” Craig’s eyes went wide.

  “No, he won’t. He would never do that,” I said, trying to reassure him. I should have been a bit scared about it, but I wasn’t. I just wanted to get rid of the burden of the dead past and love that I carried. This was my new beginning.

  “Why can’t I trust that?” Craig said, making me and the girls break out in laughter.

  ***

  A day later

  With a deep breath, I dialed the number, trying to keep myself in control. To my dismay, the phone was picked up before I had the opportunity to hang up.

  “Hello,” an unsure voice said. This was it.

  “Anne,” I whispered. “This is Eunice.” I breathed. All I could hear were her deep breaths from the other side. Minutes passed. I knew the reason behind what passed in the church. The worst part was that she became the gossip of the town. I met her father, he was my godfather, and we talked about Anne’s behavior, and her mother’s too. He was devastated with their behavior and the gossip about Anne. She was called a skank and slut. She withdrew from society. Brad Edgings sat teary in front of me, sorry about their behavior. He blamed himself for everything. It hurt me to see him like that. I promised him that everything would be fine, that I would make it fine. Anne was played by her mother, and her mother made her do things because of being deprived of the love she dreamt of. It was twisted and fucked up, yet I felt sympathy for her. Maybe if Morine and Brad would have talked and decided to make things work, they all would have been happier rather than having their life turned into a circus and being the gossip of society.

  “Anne,” I called for her again.

  “Yeah?” she whispered. “Why are you calling me?” Her voice shook.

  “I need a favor, and some of your time too. I have promised something to your father and for that, I need to meet you.”

  “Wh…at? Is it related to what I did to you and…what favor?” She hesitated.

  “It’s actually more than that, but as much as I don’t like you and want to hate you, I really can’t blame you for everything. It takes two to tango, and you were pushed in the wrong direction by someone you trusted. I can’t forgive you yet, but for the sake of your father, I can always try. He’s sad and scared for you, and I wouldn’t mind burying the hatchet between us for him. He has a lot on his plate now, and if you and I can ease some of his worries, I’m ready to try if you’re ready to move forward.” I really had to do this for her father and the very sad fact that he had begged me. He was my godfather and seeing him like that really wasn’t easy.

  “I…can try,” she exhaled.

  “Let’s meet at the Revoir Restaurant at ten a.m. I’ll tell you about the favor I wish to seek from you. Are you fine with that?” I asked.

  “Does it relate to Joshua?” she asked, being unsure. Hearing his name brought a sigh to my lips. Somehow I’d started to hate the name itself. Whenever anyone said his name, the monstrous things he said and did would flash through my mind.

  “No, it doesn’t. I talked about it with your father,” I said calmly even though on the inside I wanted to snap.

  “Would it make him happy, Eunice? If I come?” Her words held concern and hesitation. Maybe she really wasn’t that bad, just maybe.

  “Yes, it would help him relieve some his worries and pain.”

  “I will meet you at ten then,” she replied softly. For the first time, I couldn’t imagine her being a shitty bitch.

  “See you then.” I hung up and breathed a sigh of relief. It really was fucking hard.

  “How did it go?” Clarisse asked.

  “She’ll come, I’m quite sure. This might be her new beginning too,” I replied, earning a smile from her.

  “Hope she does come. We’re not doing this for us, but her father. If she doesn’t agree to it, I’ll kidnap her and glue her to the seat.” She grinned and I knew she was liking the idea more and more every minute. Well, I need to keep that in mind, desperate times would call for desperate measures.

  ***

  “Okay, it’s freaking not working,” Anne yelled as soon as she entered Nora’s apartment.

  “What?” We all looked at her in shock. Either she wasn’t putting her best effort into it or there weren’t any good guys left here. Alex warned me that getting her a date could either go downhill or be a damp squib. It was really hard to find her a good guy. Her father had asked me to help her—more like pleaded. Her mother’s actions had put a mark over her reputation. She was known as a home wrecker, slut, and god knows what by this judgmental fucked up society. We set up a date for her with a nice guy from Nora’s firm, then a model working with Clarisse, and the last one she met today was a friend of Nora’s, one of the partners in her firm. Now she was back saying that nothing was working. Nora and Clarisse looked at me, both with narrowed eyes, while Craig grinned, a grin saying I told you so. He had told us on occasions that dolling her up wasn’t something a good guy would really appreciate. They would be judgmental and think her to be a daddy’s spoiled brat. Maybe sometimes we should really listen what the guys have to say.

  “What do you mean, nothing is working?” I enquired, dragging my attention to Anne.

  “It means that they just don’t like me!” she answered before settling down beside me. “I mean, like none of them talk a lot. It feels like we’re forced to sit there and just freaking stare at the menu, food, or anyone else but each other. However, today was the zenith point. The guy looked at me from head to toe shamelessly. When we settled down, we talked for just fucking five minutes, and then he fucking looked at his watch after every ten minutes and then every five minutes. God, it was so frustrating. It took all of my control not to snap at him. I tell you this was the worst date ever!” she yelled with her face in her hands. “I hate this!” We all looked at her with pity. I knew it was a bit of our fault for having her too dressed up.

  “Hey, it’s all right. We’ll t
ry again and try to find good guys rather than jerks this time,” I said, trying to pry her hands away from her face while mouthing to all the others to help me.

  “No, it isn’t really, Eunice. It is so fucking hard to be stared at by people. It’s not only about the guy. Many people know me in the city, and they stare openly at me. Some even snicker and turn their faces away if I just greet them. It is so fucking hard to survive like this. I know very well that you’re doing this because you promised Dad to turn my life back to normal and try to fade the stains on my character. I’m very glad about what you’re doing, but it isn’t easy when people classify you as a slut, a home wrecker, and god knows what else.” She looked in my eyes. The pain she felt was evident. Well, we all understood what she meant. Anne and I might have buried the hatchet, but there were Nora and Clarisse, who gave her shit for the first few days, to the point where she would have run for the hills. I thought she might have, but she came back again for her father. For that, I started seeing her in a new light. With her mother out of the scene, she was doing pretty well.

  “I don’t want to give you any trouble and neither to anyone else,” she said. I tried to say something but she shushed me.

  “I’m going to Europe for a while. I really need a break from all this and I’m really glad that you helped me get out of my room. You helped me pull myself out of the darkness, and I’m very thankful. You have given me enough courage to stand up on my own, and now I think I need to have a new start too. I will always be ashamed of what I did. You have helped me even when you should have treated me like everyone else did. You just stayed with me, somewhere along the line you became the motherly figure I wished for. Thank you so much for all of it.” She gave me a real bright smile.

  “But your dad—” I said.

  “Don’t worry about him. I’ll talk to him about this. I really need it, Eunice. I don’t think I’ll be able to find anyone for me here, but maybe there I could find someone who won’t be a jerk. At least I’ll be safe from people’s negative stares and their taunts. Maybe this will be my real new beginning, something I would be grateful for.” Some people really change. I hoped for her to have someone in her life.

  “All the best for your date today, Eunice. I think I should go and talk to my dad. I also have to do a lot of packing,” she said, laughing. I nodded to her. She said thanks to everyone in the room, gave all of us a hug, and saying goodbye, she went on her way.

  “God, she really changed. Who could have thought that?” Clarisse said.

  “Sometimes all they need is a little push in the right direction,” I told her.

  “I hope Anne’s mistake taught you something,” Craig said. Nora gave him a deadpan look.

  “What do you really know about girls, huh?” Nora asked. An argument immediately erupted between them. Clarisse and I looked at them for a good five minutes and then turned around and walked inside my room.

  “Well, Anne’s words really helped us realize we don’t want to overdo it,” she said, closing the door to the room.

  “Yeah, but I felt a bit sad for what she had to go through on her dates. I really hope Jason isn’t a jerk.”

  “Don’t worry, Eunice, I know Jason, he’s a good guy and the best photographer we had. He has a good family background, no criminal records. He had been in two serious relationships…both of them broke up with him and ended up marrying old men. Nora checked up on him too,” she told me, laughing. “I know him, have worked with him, and he’s really a great guy. I have high hopes that you will really like him.”

  “I really hope so,” I told her. I really felt maybe this could be my new beginning.

  “Hey, their voices died down. Do you think their arguments are over or they’re on to each other?” Clarisse asked, wiggling her brows. She gave me a devious smile before walking towards the closed door. Opening the door a little ajar, she yelled, “Nora, your ass looks beautiful with Craig’s fingers digging in it!” She laughed like a maniac. A loud “fuck” was said by Craig.

  “I’m going to kill you, Clarisse,” Nora yelled back.

  “Hey, you should get a room rather than killing me,” Clarisse said, and from there on the bantering began. I just enjoyed it. I should have got popcorn for this.

  Chapter 28

  Joshua

  A month later…

  “You will have all of my attention, Mr. Clark, I can promise you that. If you choose to become our client, we are not promising you only our full attention, but we will also provide you with our best professionals. I will be overseeing it myself that you face no problems…but if you do, I will make sure to solve them. We are always there to help you out.” I was trying to bag this client for my firm. Gaining him as a client would not only boost our company’s image, it would surely help in drawing more influential and powerful clients.

  “Mr. Morris, I hope all your services will be worth what I will be paying. Let me know when the paperwork is ready to be signed. See you later,” Clark said with a small smile. He got up from his seat. Shaking hands and exchanging pleasantries, he walked out of the restaurant. Serena stood beside me, watching our new client walk out.

  “Do you need me for anything else? We only had a meeting with Mr. Clark for the evening and nothing else,” Serena said.

  “No, you can take your leave. Thanks for the presentation you came up with,” I told her. Nodding, she picked up her things and was out soon. I settled back down and fished my wedding ring from my pocket. Bringing it out, I admired it, remembered the happiness it brought to my life. It was the only essence of Eunice left with me. At times I wore it and let my mind loose in the good old memories, let my heart and mind believe that I was still married to her, we were still a couple. Living without her was too hard for me. I craved for her essence, for her love, and for her being close. It was the harsh reality that it wasn’t possible. I made myself go to Elle’s grave at times when death looked easier to me than living. My mind would drag me to the day when Eunice tried to take her life, and I would try to drag myself down the same path. It was hard to live without someone as my rock and anchor.

  I gave up drinking as much as I could and promised myself to never drink until I felt that utter need to drag myself back in time. Living alone as a shell of a man was hard, but knowing that I lost things, love, friends, family, everything hit me like a million knives in my heart. Waking up every day had been a struggle for so many months that the thoughts of giving up on life crossed my mind too many times. Even Elle’s grave couldn’t stop me. Gradually I made the good memories of the past my anchor. My days were filled with work and night with an empty house and heart. There wasn’t anything in my life besides her. She had been there for me when my mother died. She became my shoulder to cry on, she shared my worries, and my everything else but one fucked mind, one wrong seed of doubt made me lose it all.

  The sound of someone’s laugh dragged me away from my thoughts. It was sweet and melodious just like Eunice’s. It was not too loud, just enough to drag one’s attention. It wasn’t fake like that of others. Eunice’s laughs came from heart, from pure happiness. Once again the laugh caught my attention, I didn’t know why. It felt so similar to hers like it was hers only. With a swift turn, I looked at the source of laughter and that’s when I saw her. Her hair, lightened by a shade or two, had grown a bit since I last saw her, the color of her skin was glowing. No more looking like a ghost and heartbroken. I could find the hint of old Eunice I craved.

  Her brown eyes crinkled with amusement and pure happiness filled her face. She was happy, something I took away from her. Alex had told me about Eunice moving on in her life and it broke my heart little by little, word by word. He told me all about how she forgave Anne, about how happy she was, how she was going out and interacting with everyone and dating. I wanted him to stop because I died a thousand deaths sitting there listening to him, but I had asked about her. It was a pain I had to endure. Somewhere a bit of my heart wanted her to be miserable for me, like I was for her. It w
as wrong to think in such a way but I wanted her to want me. I wanted me to go back and beg her for a chance. God, there wasn’t a thing I wanted more than her love. All I wanted was to rush down to Eunice’s house and beg her for the last chance she promised. However, hearing that she was so happy, and moving on in life put a halt to my thoughts. She was happy and it stopped me. I had broken her, torn her soul, and disappointed her so much in our love that my own faith was not so strong anymore. So I stayed where I was and shoved the thoughts of being a hindrance in her life out of my mind. Someone else would give her all that I couldn’t, he would be good for her, but I wasn’t, and maybe I won’t be.

  Maybe it was the guy who I saw her with outside her room in the hotel. I racked my mind over who he was. He looked sincere, the kind that would protect the one he loved. With him, she wouldn’t ever be disappointed. But looking at her now, all those thoughts of letting her go melted. Seeing her smile made me want to bring her back in my life. She was the sun of my life, and ever since I pushed myself away, I had been surrounded by nothing but darkness. I dragged out my days, hours, and minutes without her.

  “Seriously, that was hilarious, Jason.” She laughed with the guy at her table. I sure as hell couldn’t get a clear picture of him because he had his back facing me. I couldn’t concentrate on him, my eyes were stuck on Eunice—her smile, her laughter, her glowing skin; her bright eyes shimmering with happiness sucked me in. She was all I could see. She talked with the man in front of her while I stared at her like a creep. I had this uttermost desire to be the man she spoke to. My heart and soul wanted her once again. I wanted to give her everything that other man could give. She looked towards me and our eyes locked, her laughter died down. It felt like only we existed. I could feel a connection trying to build up between us but then it broke as she looked anywhere but at me. Disappointment filled me, making me remember the past mistakes I made. I caged my feelings of wanting her. I had to let her go—she would be happy with someone else, but not me. I had killed her once I couldn’t do it again.