by Mary Smith
“It’s me.” Baylor cracks open the door. “May I come in?”
“Sure.” I reach for a tissue on my nightstand.
“Nathan gave you a card.” She sits on the side of the bed, handing me the envelope.
I open it and see some horrible handwriting, but I’m able to make it out.
The Goddess of Thunder has nothing on you. Happy birthday to my Thor.
Nathan
“I don’t get it.” Her perplexed face matches her tone. “Isn’t Thor a dude?”
“Not now.” I point to the comics at the end of my bed. “He thinks I’m Thor.” I giggle.
“Oh.” She picks up the books and glances over them. “That’s sweet.”
I nod.
“Alden feels bad.”
“No he doesn’t.” I correct her. “He’s an ass.”
“He can be, but he loves you more than anything. He’s just going through a lot.”
“He needs to apologize to me.”
“He will. Someday.”
I shrug. I know she’s right, but right now I’m beyond mad.
“I… I… didn’t know you couldn’t have kids.”
I don’t have to look at her to see the pitiful gaze on her face. I’ve seen it many times before. Doctors, Mom, Alden, it’s always the same.
“Was it because of the chemo?”
“Yes,” I answer. “I rarely have periods. I have to take birth control.”
“But you have them. That could be a good sign.” She sounds more hopeful.
“My tubes are extremely scarred. There’s really no hope.”
She takes my hand in hers. “There’s always hope, Amara.”
“Thanks.” I try to give her a smile, but it falls flat.
“I’ll leave you alone.”
I remain seated on the edge of the bed. I think about my life over the past few years. The fear of my cancer coming back. I try not to dwell on it, but it lays in the back of my mind. I’m twenty-one, and it’s time for me to be on my own. Alden has Baylor and Kace now and doesn’t need me.
I open my bank app and check out my current savings account balance. When I turned eighteen Jack sent me a big, fat check. I never really touched it. But now it could get me an apartment – at least something small.
Nathan: What time are you coming over?
I smile at the screen.
Me: Thank you for flowers and balloons. I’m on my way right now.
Getting out of the house is what I need right now.
Nathan opens the door after one knock. I almost wonder if he’s been on the other side waiting for me to get there.
“Hi.” He smiles.
I could stare at his face all day long. His blue eyes and blond hair are just perfect against his chiseled jaw and high cheekbones. Not to mention his ears. Yes, he has sexy ears.
“Amara, are you okay?”
I jolt from his voice and question. “Yes, well no.”
“Come in. Let’s talk.” He steps to the side and I walk over to the couch and sit down.
The moment he sits next to me I go into telling him about my fight with Alden. I leave out the virgin-no-kids part and my fear of cancer coming back. I already told him I had cancer but didn’t go into great detail.
“I need to find a place of my own. Maybe I can find a roommate?”
“What if you stayed here?”
“What?” Did he really say that? Did I hear him correctly?
“I mean, I have a spare room. Alden already hates me so no big difference there than if you didn’t live here. It’s quiet and you can study. I promise I won’t be a bother.”
My mouth hangs open. “I thought we were…” How does a girl ask a guy if we were going to date without sounding like a desperate tool?
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but we are friends and friends help each other out.” He shyly shrugs. “We can always date later.”
“Really? I mean, really?” I can’t believe his offer. Not just the dating part but moving in as well.
“Sure. I’m not sloppy. Although I could run a Swiffer more often. I don’t take up a lot of bathroom space. I know that’s important to females.”
“Nathan.” I turn fully to him. “Why don’t you think about it? Don’t get me wrong, I love the offer and yes, I do want to date you too. But we’ve only been talking for several months. We don’t know each other all that well.”
He mirrors my pose. “You’re right. However, I consider myself a good judge of character and I trust you.” He moves his hand on top of mine. It’s the first time we’ve truly touched. “Why don’t you think about it while we watch the next Avengers movie? I can redo the room too. It all can be purple.”
This time I do laugh. “I do love purple.”
“Let’s take our minds off reality for a bit.” He reaches for the remote with his free hand and turns on the movie.
For the next couple of hours, I watch the movie but my mind is on this crazy plan. Can I live here? I do trust him. If I moved in what will happen between us. Will we only be friends? Will more happen? Will Alden never speak to me again?
“Can I still think about it?” I ask when the movie ends.
“Of course. It’s an open offer.” He nods. “Take your time.”
I stand. “I’m heading home. Thanks for everything.” I quickly rush to the door.
“Hey.” He reaches for my hand and laces our fingers together. “Are you okay? Did I upset you?”
“No.” I squeeze his hand. “I’m okay. I just need to think.”
“Text me if you need me.”
“I will.”
I drive around for a while. I didn’t go anywhere special, just drove. If I’m going to move in with Nathan, then I need to talk to Alden. Even though we’re both mad at each other, we’re blood. He’s my brother and my best friend.
The house is quiet when I walk in, but the kitchen light is on and I know Alden is on the back porch. I walk out and his back is toward me. I see a beer in his right hand. I move until I’m in front of him.
“May we talk? Civilly.” I figure asking him is better than just blurting out what I have to say.
“Sure.” He scoffs and takes a swig of his beer.
I take the chair across from him. “Alden, you’re my brother and friend. I value your opinion but you have to value mine too.”
He picks at the beer label.
“I’m twenty-one and have been through more in these short years than most people’s lifetime. You know it’s true because you’ve been by my side the entire time.” I’m hoping I can appeal to him in some way. I think it might be working.
“What are you buttering me up for?”
Maybe it’s not helping.
“I want us to go back to normal. I want my big brother back.”
“Then stop talking to Nathan.”
I sigh and fall back further in my chair. “Why? He’s one of your friends. Is he such a bad guy? Is that why you’re adamant about us not being together?”
He rubs his forehead. “He’s not a bad guy, but he’s a hockey player.”
“So? What does his career matter?’
“He’ll be gone a lot.”
“And? Is that what you’re most concerned about?”
“No. With him being gone means he’ll cheat on you.”
I cross my arms and furrow my brow. “Then you’ll cheat on Baylor.”
“What? I’d never cheat on her. I love her. You don’t even know Nathan.”
I shake my head. “You know he’s a good guy. I know he is and I don’t peg him as a cheater. You’re just making excuses.”
Alden says nothing. He chugs his beer and slowly rises to his feet. “I forbid you to see him.
The anger begins to build through my veins. “I’m moving in with him.”
Chapter Four
Nathan
It’s been three days since I made the offer to Amara to move in with me. Teo thought I was crazy. Dad told me good job. I know my brothers will be here soon, s
o I bought a large airbed for them. They’re ten. It won’t matter where they sleep.
Now I’m carrying boxes into Amara’s new room. I purchased a bed for her. I’m hoping she likes it.
“That’s the last one.” I announce kicking the door shut. “These are marked bathroom. I’ll set them by the door.”
“Thank you.” She calls from the bedroom.
“Do you need help?” I lean against the doorframe watching her move about. I do my best not to stare at her toned, tan legs looking back at me. Her short-shorts are killing me. Just as her tank top is hugging her perfectly.
“If you can put these two on the top shelf of the closet I’d owe you one.”
“I can.” I pick up the boxes and place them in the closet. “Anything else?”
“I’m good right now.” She gives me a smile, but it doesn’t seem to be genuine.
“Are you okay?”
“Just a little sad. Not about the move, but the fact Alden still isn’t talking to me.”
“He’ll come around. Give him time.”
She nods and opens another box.
“I’ll leave you alone, but if you need me please let me know.”
“Thank you. I will.”
I go to the kitchen. I can’t believe how much my life has changed in three days. The moment I received Amara’s text saying she would move in I’ve been anxiously excited. Having her here is amazing, but now with us being this close, I’m concerned if our feelings will grow or not.
I piddle around the kitchen and order food for us. I make sure to keep everything is in place and may have run the Swiffer more than once around the place.
I turn on the PHL channel and watch an old rerun of a game from the 80s. I love hockey. I can still remember all the fun I had playing growing up. After Mom passed away, Dad would even shoot around with me. I was twelve when I was put into the net. I had previously played defense. However, one of our goalies was sick and the coach put me in with used equipment. It was awkward at first to get used to the extra weight of the equipment, but soon I got the hang of it. It didn’t take long before I was stopping pucks all the time.
Being drafted into the PHL had to be the greatest moment of my life thus far. Dad and my stepmom had been there, but I wished for my mom to be there more than anything. I had been first drafted by the Portland Kings, who put me in the MHL, or the minor leagues. Then I was traded to the Alabama Blacksmiths. I was able to start two PHL games before I was sent to the Bears, but they sent me back to the MHL again. There I decided I had to make a name for myself. It was the only way I’d get noticed.
It worked.
Getting the call up from the Bears had been a crazy, nerve-racking, amazing moment. Teo is my friend – now – but a part of me had been glad he slacked off. I came in, did my job, and was rewarded for it.
The question on my mind now is: what is going to happen?
It’s because of me we lost the biggest game in the playoffs. I had been on my game all season long – until that moment. I can’t explain why the puck got past me. It just did.
“Did you redo the bathroom?”
“Sort of.” I stand up and go down the hall.
“You bought all purple items.” She beams.
I shrug one shoulder. I went to Bed Bath and Beyond and made sure everything I purchased was purple. I know it’s her favorite color.
“Thank you, Nathan.”
“Just wanted to make you feel at home.”
“How about we get some takeout? My treat.”
“Sounds good.” I turn to leave her alone. Knowing she’s independent and I want her to feel at home. I go back to watching the classic game.
“I ordered Chinese.” She announces sitting down next to me.
“Okay.”
“What game is this?”
“Cup final of eighty-four.” I explain.
She watches the screen with me for a few. “Hockey can be mesmerizing.”
“Very true.”
She’s correct. There’s something about watching the determination of the players fighting for the puck that makes your heart beat faster. Maybe it’s because I know the feeling. I thrive for it over and over. Almost like a drug.
When the door buzzer goes off Amara jumps up and answers it. She comes strolling back with her sexy legs and sets everything down on the kitchen table.
“I got a little of everything.” She tells me. “I wasn’t sure what you like.”
“I can eat anything.” I’m far from a picky eater. As she gets all of it out of the bags, I get the plates and utensils. “Want a beer or water?”
“Water.”
I place everything on the table and we begin to fill our plates with food. We eat in silence for a while before she speaks up.
“Is this a date?”
“What?”
“Would you consider this a date?” Her brown eyes wait for my answer.
“No. I’d think this was two roommates having dinner together for the first time.”
“Roommates?” The disappointment is clear in her tone.
I sigh. “Amara, listen can we please not title anything between us?” I don’t know what else to say. I know females care about labels and such, that’s not me. Looking over at her, I’m waiting for her wrath of tears, but she’s nodding.
“You’re right. I’m being too pushy. This is all new to me.”
I put my hand over hers. “Me too.” I want to tell her the rest of what I’m thinking but stop myself. I can’t blurt out I’m a virgin who’s never dated anyone.
I’ve had many opportunities to take women out and have sex with them. Hell, I can’t count the times Alden and I have been in a bar and the women swarmed over us. Yet I always went home alone.
Amara is a different type of female. She’s classy. You’d never see her in a bar and dry humping a guy for drinks. The guys she probably dated were nothing like me. I’m a nice guy, but I’ve never really… what’s the word? Wooed? I’ve never wooed a girl before. I think that’s the fancy word girls like to use.
“Nathan, are you okay?”
Her question breaks my train of thought. “I’m good. Thank you for understanding.”
“Of course. I’m sorry for being overzealous.”
“It’s fine.” I go back to my dinner and we return to silence.
When we finish I help her clean up everything and store the leftovers. As I’m finishing washing the dishes she asks me about the bills.
“What do you mean?”
“I assume rent is due on the first of every month. What about the others?”
“Generally I just pay through my bill pay, so I guess around the fifth of each month.”
“Then you tell me my half and I’ll write you a check. Or do you prefer cash?”
“Whichever.”
“Okay.” She dries the last dish and puts it away. “I’m going to work on my room. Thanks for everything.” She smiles before leaving me alone in the kitchen.
I take a deep breath and grip the counter tightly. Maybe this isn’t the best idea having Amara live with me. Then again she’s my friend and needed help. I’ll do anything for those I care about.
I sit on the couch, picking up my new comic of All-New All-Different Avengers. I’m loving this series a lot. I’m deep into the battle scene when my phone dings.
Alden: Come downstairs. Now.
I deflate knowing this can’t be good. He probably wants to punch me. When I reach the lobby, I can see him pacing outside the door. He seems to be stressed out, which means he will break my nose at the very least.
“Hey,” I say stepping outside.
“Yep.” Alden crosses his arms and glares at me. Even though I’m at least five inches taller than him, he can still kick my ass.
“What did you need?” Sounding tough has never been a strong suit of mine.
“Is my sister okay?”
“You can ask her yourself. She’s upstairs.”
“Just answer me.” He
growls.
I sigh, giving into him. “She’s fine. She’s putting her stuff away.”
“Good.” He nodded looking away from me. “Listen don’t take any money from her for bills. You let me know how much she owes and I’ll pay it.”
“I already planned on refusing anything she gives me.” It’s the reason I lied to her about the bill date.
“Look she might be your girlfriend—”
“She’s not my girlfriend. Don’t you hear me? We’re just friends for now and seeing where it goes.”
“She moved in with you. I can figure out where it’s going.”
I began to grow angry. “Shut up, Alden. You don’t know a fucking thing. You’re treating me like shit for no reason. You’re my friend, and you know me better. Why are you acting like this?”
His glare deepens. “This is my sister. She deserves to be with the best guy.”
“And I’m some shit on a shoe?”
“You’re a hockey player who sticks his dick in anything that walks.”
“I’m a damn virgin, man. Exactly what has my dick been in? Besides my hand.”
Have you ever experienced a moment in your life you wished you could delete? Yep, this is that moment for me. I can’t believe I just blurted that out.
He steps back. “Bro, you’re lying. We’ve caught plenty of pussy together.”
I shake my head. “No, you have. I usually sat at the bar and waited for you to finish banging whatever chick you were with in the bathroom.”
He scrunches his face as if trying to concentrate on a hard math problem. “Um…”
“Look.” I move closer to him. “Right now, I’m Amara’s friend. Will there be more between us? I hope so, but I’m not some manwhore who has a trail of women behind me. I really like her, and I want your blessing.”
My friend stares at me for several seconds before saying, “Virgin or not, she’s my sister and my priority. Let me know about the bills.” He turns away from me and walks back to his car.
I’m not sure if he’ll run off and tell everyone about my sexual status, but I’ll deal with it when it arises.
Chapter Five
Amara
Baylor had shown me how to do the daily and monthly paperwork for the tattoo shop a couple of weeks ago and I have added it to my to-do list. Since the release of the features in INK America of Baylor’s work on my brother’s arms, the place has doubled its clients.
