Dirty Talk

by Lauren Landish

  So why did I join? I guess the answer’s simple—it was something to do to get me out of here and grow up. I saw friends getting more and more lost, trying drugs and working dead-end jobs, and at some point, I realized I wanted more than that. I figured the military might make a man out of me. How was I supposed to anticipate spending most of my time outside of basic training in a godforsaken desert? How could I have known what I would see . . . what I would have to do?

  I watch Brad leave, and my eyes tick back to McKayla, who is sweeping up, bending over in a skirt that hugs her every curve like it was custom-made for her. She may be a Pretty Pink Princess, but she’s built like a pin-up queen.

  Hell, I don’t know. She’s a Hollywood girl. Maybe it was made for her curvy measurements. She hasn’t made a big deal of her background. I think she’s left that in Brad’s hands, but the rumors have gotten around, and a few people have Googled her. Supposedly, she’s done some pretty famous shit, not that they advertise who cuts the hair on summer blockbusters.

  I’m about to go inside for the evening when I see that prick, Jaxson, striding down the sidewalk, and I shrink even farther into the shadows so he won’t see me. I stand there, hidden except for the wisps of smoke from the cigarette I’m just holding as a cover while I stand there not moving, watching for twenty minutes while he chats up McKayla, obviously trying to lay the mac down on her. He even tries sweeping like a dutiful servant before she ushers him out the front door. I have to smirk . . . I may not know a lot about McKayla, but it’s not the way to impress that woman. She’s the kind who I bet loves to get treated like a queen, but only from a man strong enough.

  My fist tightens against my thigh when I see him lean in to kiss her, but I damn near guffaw out loud when I see her bob and duck away from his advance. Damn, last time I saw moves like that was when Ali was making people look like fools in a boxing ring on YouTube.

  Good girl. Smart girl, I think. You don’t want to let him in even an inch.

  He walks away, turning back for one more wave, but she stays outside, glancing along the street for a moment. I predict when her gaze will hit the front of the garage and take my first drag on my cancer stick, lighting up the cherry, and like a moth to a flame, I feel it when her eyes latch on to my location.

  It’s not what I should do, intentionally drawing her attention like that, and honestly, I don’t even know why I do it. I just want her to know I’m here. She squints for a moment, making sure her eyes aren’t playing tricks on her. I toss my can to the side, where it rattles as it makes its way into the trash barrel that TJ insists on keeping right outside the office door . . . probably because of my damn cans.

  I’m smiling, knowing McKayla’s about to hairflip away again and stomp inside. I’m already focused on her hips, ready for the quick view of her ass in that leopard skirt, when I realize that she’s not turning to go inside and instead, those curvy hips are getting closer as she struts across the street toward me. As she gets close, I look her up and down. “So, wanting to see the bike again?”

  She’s not amused. “Hey, asshole, you just perving out over here now? Get an eyeful?”

  I smile, but it’s a small consolation. “Evan.”

  Her thunder stolen, she stares at me, confused. “Huh?”

  I raise an eyebrow, “You called me asshole. My name’s Evan.” Patting my chest in a mocking thump, then pointing at her, “Me Evan, You Princess. Just thought you’d want to know who you’re bitching at. Continue.” I wave my hand in a come on gesture, since while I know I’ve knocked her back a little, she’s not the kind to stay that way for long.

  She smirks, continuing. “I said . . . Evan, a.k.a. Pervy McPerverson, maybe you should take a picture. It’d last longer.” She eyes me like saying my name is asking her to chug a lima bean juice frappe.

  I smile, and it’s a real one, a rare occurrence these days, as I’m struck with a thought. Curious, I ask her, “Maybe one of you trespassing on my bike? How’d that turn out, anyway? Get what you needed?”

  It’s the longest string of speech I’ve offered her yet, and judging by the shock on her face, she realizes that too. Her sails deflate, and while it takes a little bit out of the fiery sexiness she’s got, it also makes her cuter in a lot of ways. “Yeah, about that. I really am sorry. I did try to ask, and when nobody answered, I meant to just stand in front of it and not touch. I got carried away. I’d say it won’t happen again, but that’d be a lie. My whole life is pretty much me getting carried away by crazy ideas and wild adventures.”

  I huff out a laugh at her honest admission. “So tell me, what’s the craziest idea, the wildest adventure you’ve ever been carried away on?”

  She looks up to the sky like there’s an answer written in the sparks of the stars, humming as she searches her memory. Considering how long it’s taking, either she’s going to lie her ass off or she actually has gotten into some crazy shit. I’m kinda hoping it’s the second.

  Finally, looking me in the eye, she starts. “Well, I’d say the time I dared to touch a guy’s bike without permission, but maybe that’s not so crazy after all. How about ditching Hollywood and moving to a new town to start a new business when I only know one person in the whole town? Meh, you know that too. Let’s see . . .”

  She taps her lips with black painted nails that glitter in the street lights, and I feel a long forgotten tingle in my jeans. It’s not that the equipment doesn’t work, but usually, the demons are running around too much for me to do anything about it. “Well?” I ask, trying not to laugh. “Let me guess, you went to a club and Leonardo DiCaprio walked in . . . and walked out ten minutes later with you and every other woman in the club in tow.”

  “Leo?” she asks. “Gimme some credit, it’d take him more than five minutes for me alone. Six, at least. Anyway, ah . . . yep, craziest adventure. I once hitchhiked across the state line to Nevada, just a backpack of snacks and a hundred bucks to my name. Rode with a truck driver on the way there and a group of bikers on the way back. In hindsight, they might’ve been a motorcycle club, but I didn’t care at the time. They were just going in the right direction.”

  My eyes go wide. That’s a bit wilder than I’d thought. Maybe even bordering on stupid. “What was in Nevada? Hitting the slots with that hundred?”

  McKayla leans in to whisper like she doesn’t want anyone to hear, even though we’re alone on the darkened street. “I went to a Prince concert.”

  I realize how close she is and my heartbeat picks up as I look at her. “All that for a concert? Must’ve been some show.”

  She leans back, eyes meeting mine, and grins. “That’s not the crazy part. The crazy part is that I hitchhiked with a trucker and a biker gang to Vegas and back for a Prince concert alone . . .” She pauses for dramatic effect. “when I was sixteen. And lived to tell the tale. It was fun and I was damn lucky.”

  All right, not bordering on stupid, but about three days past the line of stupid. At least she seems to recognize how insane it was. “That’s a dangerous adventure. Hope you’re a little smarter about your escapades now.”

  She smirks at me, tilting her head in a way that sends another tingle down my spine. “Sometimes yes, sometimes no. You only live once, so I’m going for it, balls to the wall. Speaking of, come on.” She grabs at my hand like she’s ready to lead me somewhere, lifting her chin toward her salon. “Let me show you something.”

  I’m a little stunned. Nobody willingly touches me these days. Everyone’s too scared of the growling, ticking time bomb that I am to even approach me. I’m surprised some people don’t ask to see my rabies tag.

  But she just takes my hand like it’s no big deal. Crazy and wild, indeed. I’m curious what she’s up to, so I follow, prowling across the street with her. She pulls open the salon doors, leading me inside, and walks up to a wall in the reception area. “Well, you wanted to see it. There you go.”

  I can’t really see this angle from my shop-front, so I look around and see what she’s talki
ng about. The photo of her posed leaning over my bike looks like something that you’d find on one of those old motorcycle calendars, Miss July because she’s so damn hot. But whoever did the filtering and printing did a lot to up the class level a notch, making it classy and not trashy. The black and white coloring gives it a vintage feel, highlighting the curves of her body and my bike.

  I instantly memorize it because it’s probably the hottest thing I’ve ever seen and I know I’ll be jacking off to that image later tonight.

  I turn toward McKayla, giving her a low whistle. “I don’t wanna sound rude, but you look sexy as fuck in this picture. Maybe I should’ve let you take a few more with my bike before running you off.”

  If I thought she’d be turned off by my lack of finesse, I’m dead wrong because she moves in close, rising up to her tiptoes in those damn high heels to press her lips to mine.

  It’s sultry and heated, even as her lips simply move against mine, not begging entry, just enjoying the moment. She breaks contact, leaving my lips burning, and looks into my eyes. “Well, Evan? You going to be rude some more?”

  Before I know what I’m doing, I grab her around the waist, kissing her back forcefully, pulling her body in tight to press against mine, her glorious mix of soft curves and firm flats making my heart race. My cock lets loose a battle cry that I haven’t felt in a long time, raging to full hardness in my jeans as I reach down to knead her ass.

  She lets out a whimpering sigh of delight, and I take advantage, slipping my tongue in to tangle with hers. It feels like sparks are flicking against my skin everywhere we touch as our lips work at each other. She slips a hand up to my hair, threading the strands through her fingers and gently pulling me even deeper.

  Her other hand claws at my back, those manicured nails scratching my shoulder blade deeply. The flash of pain wakes me up, and I pull back, resting my forehead against hers, my breath coming in pants as I try to recover. McKayla’s breathing is even heavier, her eyes wild. “What’s wrong?”

  I take her arms in my hands and nudge her away to look her in the eye. “You don’t want to do this. Crazy and wild adventures might be your thing, but I’m not an adventure you want to try out. You’ll just get yourself hurt. I’m a damn nosediving plane, just trying to stay steady and praying I don’t pancake when I hit rock bottom. And fucking the new chick across the street damn sure isn’t gonna make my life any easier.”

  I step back, still trying to shake off the effect she’s had on me. My body is crying out, no part of it louder than my cock, which is screaming at me to turn the fuck around and go back. It’s forgotten what a real woman feels like.

  I ignore it, using the last little scrap of decency left in me to keep my feet pointing in the right direction. Walking out the door, I hear her behind me. “Bye . . . Evan.”

  Chapter 7

  McKayla

  “And so anyway, John was like, I saw this on Netflix when I was thinking the whole time, ‘uh-huh. You’ve just been watching porn again.’ So I turned to him and said if you think I’m gonna put my mouth anywhere near—”

  I tune out the chatter, trying desperately not to focus as another one of my customers seems to want to treat a haircut like a chance to engage in some free sex counseling or something. Maybe it’s our image. The cheesecake shot of me on the motorcycle probably doesn’t help, even if it is fucking awesome. But with Brad and me being a little more . . . out there than the average person around here, paired with our natural flirtatious natures, people think we’re sex experts or something.

  I wish. Right now, the only thing going through my mind is fuck me running. Or standing, or lying down, or sitting. Or basically any damn way that doesn’t involve the police. Since kissing Evan a few days ago, riding that man to oblivion is all I can think about. Come to think of it, maybe I am a little more sexpert than most because my mind is coming up with some pretty inspired ideas right now. Straddling him as we race down a deserted road probably isn’t the best idea though.

  I’ve gotten through the days, seeing customers virtually back-to-back all day. I really haven’t had time to count my lucky stars, but Brad was right last week. We might need to look at hiring another pair of hands around here. Front desk, clean up, even another stylist. I remind myself of that again as Mrs. Alameda in front of me keeps going on about her husband.

  While the hustle has helped keep me from going nuts, more than once, Brad has caught me daydreaming as I stare out the window across the street. I haven’t told him why yet, but he’s smart. He knows. He just hasn’t said anything yet, but he knows I like men like Evan. And motorcycles. And bad boys on motorcycles.

  Speaking of, I glance up to stare out the window and across the street, straight into his garage. It didn’t take me long to figure out that by putting my clients in the first chair on the left side, I could keep track of the big doors on the shop. And it only took me about five minutes after they opened Monday morning to realize we have a clear shot to see inside as they work on cars. Can I get an amen for beautiful weather?

  I finish up with Mrs. Alameda and swipe her card before standing behind the counter and looking out across the street during the ten minutes I’ve got open in my schedule, taking advantage of the free shot I’m getting. And I’ll admit that maybe, just maybe, I’m watching like the pervert I accused Evan of being. But right now, he’s working on a truck, his muscular arms flexing as he turns some sort of wrench while taking the rear tires off. I don’t care if it makes me a pervert or not. My eyes are locked onto him, memorizing every detail.

  I hear Brad tsk behind me. “Girl, are you at it again?”

  I smile, turning just my head to answer. “Hell to the yes, I am. Hey, I see there’s another guy over there working on a car. Who do you think he is?”

  Brad sighs, looking to the heavens as he comes over from his station, probably praying for strength to not wring my neck. He looks out the window for a moment, then shrugs. “Considering your boy told me he owns the shop with his brother, and that guy is a younger, sweeter looking version of your asshole boy toy obsession, I’d lay bets that he’s the brother. I’m brilliant at deduction like that. Just call me Shercock fucking Holmes.”

  I laugh, shaking my head. “You know I read somewhere that Holmes and Watson probably did the dirty in Arthur Conan Doyle’s private notebooks?”

  “It ain’t dirty. Well, not too dirty, unless that’s your kink,” Brad says with a smirk. “So, about your boyfriend—”

  I glower at Brad, elbowing him in the side. “He’s not my boyfriend. But he’s damn sure gonna take me for a ride. On that bike or otherwise.”

  A timer chimes softly, and I walk back toward my second favorite chair, where I can still get a view of Evan at work, but not as good a view. I’ve got another client in it, chilling out with her earbuds in while a heat activated conditioner soaks into her blonde locks. I pat her shoulder, and she opens an eye, popping out an earbud. “Hey, Rose, your conditioning treatment is done. Ready to wash up?”

  Rose sighs, taking out the other earbud, looking disappointed. “Already time? Damn, my audiobook was just getting to the good stuff.”

  “Good stuff like good stuff? Well, don’t let me stop you. Just let it play out loud while I rinse your hair and maybe we’ll all enjoy the good stuff for a minute. Lord knows, I’m not getting any otherwise.”

  Rose, who’s a little older than me and totally the good girl with a deep-seated naughty streak that will rock some guy’s world some day, laughs, popping the earbud jack out of her tablet to let the audiobook play. “. . . throwing her onto the bed, the pirate captain growls as he rips her bodice clean up the front, leaving her breasts heaving into the chilled air. Diving in, he suckles her nipple, her wanton body writhing in need for the long, hard sword she felt pressing against her through his tight breeches. ‘Please, Captain . . . please . . .’ she begs. ‘Give it to me.’

  ‘Aye,’ the captain says, leering at her. ‘I’ll make you shiver on me timber.’”


  I bust out in raucous laughter, unable to take any more. “What the hell are you listening to, Rose? Some pirate porn shit? It’s literally a bodice ripper!”

  She’s laughing now too, and Brad just stares at us like we’re from an alien species before he gripes. “Is that really what women read? Long, hard sword. Shiver on me timber. Seriously? It’s not that difficult.”

  “Oh?” Rose asks, grinning at Brad. “And what does it take then, oh expert on all things concerning male seduction?”

  Brad shrugs. “Girls, take it from me. Just tell the man you want his cock, and he’ll be ready to go nine times out of ten. Hell, they’ll be breaking down your door.”

  “Yeah, well, gotta worry about our reputations,” Rose counters, making Brad shrug, unconcerned. “What?”

  “You know what a reputation is? It’s what you use to console yourself when you’re using a vibrator instead of the real thing.” He presses his lips together as he snaps his fingers and hums his agreement with his own statement. “And on that sage advice, I’m outtie for lunch. You bitches want me to grab you anything from the diner?”

  He points at each of us, waiting for us to shake our head before swooshing out the door. Brad’s relaxed more, being his fabulous self more in public, and I’m glad. For now, though, Rose and I look at each other and dissolve into giggles again. I wipe a tear from my eye, “So . . . pirate porn, huh? Wouldn’t have pegged you as the type. Get it . . . pegged?”

  She groans and rolls her eyes at my bad pun but sobers up. “Yeah, well, I’ve been so busy with the boutique, starting it on my own and working the B shift—I’ll be there when it opens, and I’ll be there when it closes—that I haven’t really had time to date or have a personal life at all.”

  “Hire some help,” I comment, but Rose shakes her head. “Why not?”