Insider (Outsider Series)

by Micalea Smeltzer

  “Oh,” she said again. “Caeden was defending you.”

  “Yeah,” I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. “And Bryce wouldn’t do anything to stop him. Logan and Bentley could barely get him off of Travis. It was pretty messy. He hurt Travis pretty badly. I’m worried that maybe Travis has gotten ahold of Caeden and done something.”

  “Bentley wouldn’t let that happen,” Gram said. “Besides, the Grimm pack is weaker. Not just number wise but in general.”

  “That doesn’t mean they can’t do some serious damage Gram. Travis did murder his father. It takes a sick person to kill their parent no matter how evil said parent may be.”

  Gram’s smile was wide. “Spoken like a true Alpha.”

  * * *

  I paced in my bedroom, biting my nails, getting absolutely no homework done. Caeden was definitely going to get a kick to the shin for this as soon as I was sure he was whole and unscathed.

  “Sophie!” Gram called from her bedroom. “Go to bed! I can’t sleep with you pacing!”

  “I can’t sleep!” I called back.

  I heard Gram’s dramatic sigh and then the shuffling of her shoving the bed covers off. “I declare Sophie Noelle, you will be the end of me.”

  She shuffled into the kitchen and I left pacing my room to see what she was up to.

  Gram puttered around the kitchen; opening and closing cabinet doors.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  “Making you a tea that will hopefully make you sleep,” she sighed dramatically. “You’re driving me bananas.”

  She pulled out a teakettle and a mug. She set to making the tea and I sat at the table watching her. “I really don’t think tea is going to help me sleep,” I said and propped my head up on my hand.

  “Well, it can’t hurt,” she huffed and put her hand on her hip. Her gray hair was sticking up wildly around her head. I glanced at the clock, which I had been trying to avoid, and saw that it was after midnight. “And don’t think,” she said, “for one minute that if you stay up all night you’re going to get out of going to school tomorrow.”

  “School is the least of my problems,” I mumbled.

  The teakettle went off and Gram dutifully poured it into a mug. “Please try to drink it,” she said as she handed it to me. Its warmth was a welcoming comfort. I blew into its amber depths and watched the steam coil above it in ever evolving shapes.

  Gram patted my cheek. “Go to bed, Sophie.”

  “How come you’re so calm about this?” I asked.

  She slowed her footsteps and finally stopped. With her back to me she said, “I was married to an Alpha for a very long time. I got used to having him leave me behind while he went out. Sometimes he’d be gone for days but he’d always come back to me.” She turned towards me and tears glimmered in her eyes. “Caeden will always come back to you, Sophie, always.”

  “But I don’t want to be left behind,” I whispered, wrapping my hands tighter around the cup of tea.

  “Well, you better get used to it Sophie. You’re going to be left behind a lot. It’s an Alpha’s nature to protect his mate and that usually means you get left behind and lied to.” Sighing, she said, “Go back to bed, Soph, you need your sleep and so do I.”

  She looked so forlorn that I couldn’t possibly argue with her.

  “Thanks for the tea, Gram,” I said and stood up to kiss her cheek.

  “You’re welcome,” she patted my hand and disappeared into her bedroom.

  I picked up my tea and headed to my own bedroom, admiring Caeden’s and my handiwork. I perched on the end of the bed and sipped my tea while willing sleep to overcome me. Archie jumped up on the bed beside me, and Murphy looked up at me from the floor with a sad, helpless, look. I reached my hand out and scratched his head.

  “I’m worried too bud,” I said and he looked into my eyes with far too much intelligence.

  I finished my tea and set the empty cup on my nightstand. I pulled the covers back and crawled under, turning my light out in the process. I patted the large empty space beside me where Caeden usually slept.

  “Murphy, get up here boy,” I coaxed the large dog onto the bed beside Archie. He jumped agilely over me and plopped down beside me. Archie turned in three circles and then lay down on the pillow. I scooted over and cuddled both of the dogs. I rhythmically stroked their fur and counted backwards from one hundred. Then I counted sheep. Eventually, sleep mercifully took me.

  * * *

  I awoke to a loud banging noise and sat straight up. I reached for the light, not to turn it on, but for a weapon. All I could think was that Travis had killed Caeden, and now he’d come for me. My heart thudded in my throat.

  “Hey, hey, it’s just me,” sounded a voice I’d know anywhere.

  “Caeden!” I cried and threw myself in his arms.

  “Whoa,” he said, as he rocked back from the force of my impact.

  He flicked on the overhead light and I did a quick survey to make sure he was okay. Once the elation of his safety had passed I beat his chest and tears flooded my eyes and coursed down my cheeks.

  “Soph?” he said.

  “Don’t you ever, ever, ever, do that again, Caeden. I’ve been worried sick. I thought something really bad happened to you. I thought you were dead somewhere and I’d never know what happened to you. Please don’t go off like that anymore without letting me know that you’re safe.”

  “I didn’t know,” he said softly. “I’m really sorry. You’re completely right. I should’ve let you know something. Nothing bad happened so I just didn’t think about the time.”

  “How would you feel,” I threw my arms out, “if I went off to do a scan and was gone for hours and hours when I was supposed to come right back?”

  He swallowed. “I’d tear the ends of the earth apart looking for you.”

  The fight went out of my body and I buried my face in his chest. I wrapped my arms tightly around him and inhaled his scent. I instantly felt comforted by pine, citrus, cinnamon, and wood.

  He picked me up, motioned the dogs out of the bed and climbed inside. The sheets were still warm from my body heat and the dogs. He slipped his jeans off and tossed them across the room before pulling me against his body, spooning me.

  “I’m really, truly, and completely sorry for worrying you,” his lips brushed my ear as he tenderly played with my hair. “We caught a strange scent and ran with it and we ended up in Maryland.”

  “Did you figure out what it was?” I asked.

  “No,” he said and the pillow and sheets ruffled as he shook his head. “I’m sure it has something to do with Travis though.”

  “Could it be another shifter? A different type?”

  “No,” he said again. “I’d know that. All shifters can distinguish the scent of other shifters. This was… it smelled like death.”

  “Death?”

  “Murder,” he said. “It was awful,” he buried his face in my hair.

  “How do you know it was murder? Did you find a body?” I asked.

  “No,” he said and his heart thudded against my back, “we didn’t find any bodies. But the smell…” he trailed off. “There was just this feeling of emptiness, of sadness, I just can’t explain. It’s like I felt these lost souls floating around.”

  “What makes you think it has something to do with Travis?”

  “Intuition,” he answered immediately. “It’s just this gut feeling I have and I can’t shake it.”

  I rolled over to face him and tucked my hands under my head. He reached out and gently traced my forehead, my nose, and my mouth, before brushing my hair from my face. His hand was warm and instantly soothed me. My eyes fluttered closed and he laughed. I blinked them open and found him smiling at me.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Sometimes I feel like this is all a dream and one day I’m going to wake up and you’ll be gone.”

  “This isn’t a dream Caeden. I’m real and I’m not going anywhere. Ever.”


  He smiled but it quickly faded. “I have to figure out what Travis is up to. It’s not good, whatever it is.”

  I took his hand and held it to my heart. “But this time we do it together.”

  He kissed me and said, “Always.”

  eleven.

  Travis’ car was already in the parking lot but fortunately he was nowhere to be seen. Caeden relaxed beside me and his grip loosened on my hand. The crescent shaped marks his nails had left on my skin quickly healed and returned to its normal color.

  “Please don’t get in a fight with him today if you see him, please,” I begged.

  “I won’t,” he sighed. “I promise to be on my best behavior,” he said in a brighter tone and playfully nipped my chin.

  We headed into the school and found an empty cafeteria table. I looked around for any sign of Travis or his pack in case I was going to have to tackle Caeden. I didn’t quite trust him not to hurt Travis. Bryce sauntered into the school and found us easily. Charlotte’s hand was held snugly in his.

  Bryce plopped dramatically into the seat across from me, his backpack bouncing. “Ready for Harding?” he asked.

  I groaned and buried my face in my hands. “Don’t remind me.” Mrs. Harding was bound to give us a ton of homework and I still had all of my homework from yesterday to do.

  Bryce flashed a lopsided grin. “It’s going to be epic. Mrs. Harding is always a bitch after spring break.”

  “Isn’t she always?” I retorted.

  “That’s true,” Bryce shrugged. “Maybe bitchier is a better term,” he quirked a brow for my approval. He suddenly hopped up and said, “I’m going to go get some breakfast.”

  “Didn’t mom feed you?” Caeden asked.

  Bryce’s mouth turned down in a frown, which was rare for him. “She made me eat a spinach omelet. Spinach!”

  Caeden laughed. “I’m so glad I didn’t have to eat that.”

  I shook my head. “When will you boys learn that green food is good for you. If I recall correctly you did enjoy your salad that one evening,” I remembered back to the early stages of our relationship. We hadn’t even been together a year yet and I was already thinking about the early stages.

  “Yes, but you also made steak so that made it okay to have a little bit of salad.”

  “You’re logic is whack,” I said with a laugh.

  “No, it’s a proven fact. If a man has to eat something green then he needs some meat,” he paused and grinned, “and of course something pretty to look at.”

  “Of course,” I rolled my eyes.

  Bryce returned with a tray of various items. “This is ridiculous,” he said as he pointed to his tray. “I’m going to starve to death. I mean, do they really think this cardboard is healthy,” he picked up a granola bar. He bit into it and said. “Ew, it has nuts in it! I’m not a horse so why are they feeding me this stuff.” Bryce then picked up an apple. “Ugh, sour,” he said and made a face. “This was a big waste of money,” he said and got up, stalking towards the trashcans.

  Charlotte giggled and looked at me before shrugging. “What am I going to do with him?” she said.

  “I wish you luck,” Caeden said and slung his arm across my shoulders.

  “Hey guys,” Chris said brightly. Bentley was right beside her with her hand in his. Those two were permanently glued to each other’s hips. I’d think it was disgusting if Caeden and I didn’t act the same way.

  Logan sulked behind them and came around the table and sat beside me. He pulled a book out of his backpack and began to read.

  Chris and Bentley sat down and Chris leaned across the table towards her older brother. “Logan, seriously?”

  “What?” he asked in his deep monotone voice.

  “You’re reading?”

  “Uh, yeah. I think that’s pretty obvious,” he pointed to the book with a thin hand.

  “You’re such a recluse. You need to hang out and talk with us more often,” she said.

  “And you need to stop being such an annoying pest,” he snapped and closed the book with a bang. He stuffed it into his bag and walked off.

  “I swear he’s moodier than a girl,” Chris said. “Men have no room to talk about girls and their mood swings. I mean, really?”

  “It’s because he’s gay,” Bryce said as he sat back down.

  “What?” we all said.

  “Oh come on,” Bryce said in that drawled out, dramatic way of his. He looked at all of our stunned faces and said, “Seriously? None of your gaydars go off when he’s around?”

  “No,” we said.

  “Geez,” Bryce said and his eyebrows went up his forehead in surprise. “That’s why he’s so grumpy all the time.”

  “Why would being gay make him grumpy?” I asked.

  Bryce sighed dramatically. “He’s not grumpy because he’s gay, he thinks he has to hide it from us.”

  “But none of us would judge him for being gay. There’s nothing wrong with that,” I said.

  “But the council of elders would,” Caeden said softly. “He would be executed.”

  I gasped. “Executed? For being gay?”

  “Yes,” Caeden said sadly, “it would be seen as impure and a disgrace to our heritage and if they didn’t execute him he would be cast out of the pack. And a castaway never survives.”

  “That’s… that’s sickening,” I said. “No wonder Logan acts the way he does all the time.”

  Chris frowned. “How could I not know this? I’m his sister. Are you sure?” she turned to Bryce.

  “Positive,” he said.

  Her shoulders slumped sadly. “I wish he would’ve trusted me enough to confide in me.”

  “Babe,” Bentley, rubbed her shoulder.

  She shrugged off his touch and said, “I have to go find him.” She melted into the crowd of students just as the bell rang.

  Bryce turned to me and waggled his eyebrows, “Show time.”

  * * *

  Bryce was right, Mrs. Harding was even more of a nightmare than usual and I had the added luxury of having Travis sit behind me. This was just fabulous. At least he didn’t play with my hair this time or try to touch me. He was probably afraid his hand would be torn off and even though shifters can heal fast that doesn’t mean we can regrow limbs. The idea of a handless Travis brought a smile to my lips.

  “Ms. Beaumont what are you smiling about?” Mrs. Harding snapped, spittle flying.

  Quick, think Sophie, think. “Um… math makes me happy.”

  Travis snickered behind me which made me want to turn around and stab him in the eye with a pencil.

  “Math makes you happy?” she asked.

  “Yes,” I said and nodded.

  “You’re in trouble now,” Bryce whispered under his breath.

  “Well,” Mrs. Harding smiled, showcasing crooked yellow teeth, “if math makes you so happy then you can stay after school with me and we’ll see just how happy you are.”

  “Uh, I can’t do that. I work after school.”

  Mrs. Harding smiled even broader and I swear she looked like a toad. “Tomorrow morning then. I expect you in this classroom at seven-thirty and you will not be permitted to leave until the morning bell rings.”

  “I’ll look forward to it,” I said around the lump in my throat.

  She smiled through the rest of the class.

  * * *

  Mr. Collins, the woodshop teacher, was eager to start a new project today.

  Pushing his black-framed glasses up his nose, he said, “Today, we’re going to start building cabinets. I’ve run out of storage areas and I thought this would be a good learning experience for you. You should see a sheet in front of you that shows that dimensions that I need. You can either make a plain cabinet or you can add detailing for extra credit. And Sophie?” He looked at me.

  “Yes?” I asked.

  “Please, I’m begging you, stay away from the power tools.”

  “Will do,” I said.

  “Thank you,” he breathed
a sigh of relief. “Caeden can build the cabinet and you can stain and I’ll grade you on that. Get to work.”

  Caeden was already reading over the directions. Since I didn’t want to interrupt him I cleaned out my backpack.

  He got up and began to gather wood and tools. I dumped the items I had cleaned out of my backpack into the trashcan and headed over to our workstation. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail. Even though I wasn’t the one using the tools that didn’t mean my hair couldn’t still be caught in one of the various devices.