My Sexiest Mistake

by Kristin Hardy

  Cade just leaned against the counter and watched her quietly.

  “I mean, it’s just sex,” she said, reasoning aloud. “It shouldn’t rule our lives. We had a good time with each other before and lived to tell the tale.” Unable to stand still, she began to pace, her heels ringing on the marble floor. “Lots of people just have casual sex. Why shouldn’t we? We go to bed, we have a good time, and we burn it out.”

  She stopped to take a gulp of wine, then she couldn’t stand his silence any more. “What do you think?”

  For a moment, he simply looked at her. Then he pushed away from the counter. “I think we should go sit down.” Ryan followed him, as he walked down the hall. She drifted toward the living room arch, expecting him to turn in. Instead, he turned left to mount the stairs. Adrenaline pumped through her. She’d thought she meant what she’d said, but she hadn’t expected him to take her at her word, no further conversation. It was too fast, she thought wildly.

  Upstairs, he turned down a short hall and into the master bedroom.

  “Wait,” she blurted, trailing him into the room.

  Cade stopped and looked at her inquiringly, his hand on the latch to a sliding glass door. Beyond it, a wooden deck overlooked the river.

  “Oh.” Ryan breathed a faint sigh of relief.

  “What?”

  “Nothing. I just thought…”

  A corner of his mouth curved up. “Worried that I wasn’t wasting any time?”

  “Something like that.”

  He stepped up to her, so close she could hear the soft sound of his breath over the pounding of her heart. So close she could feel his heat. “Well, I suppose we could get right to it if you really want to, but I think we’d be better off talking about it first.” He moved back to slide open the door and walk out onto the wooden deck. Ryan followed him.

  Citronella candles perfumed the air. The blues music she’d heard downstairs played quietly from wall-mounted speakers. Robert Parker’s latest lay face down between a pair of forest-green Adirondack chairs. The river glimmered beyond.

  The wineglass felt cool against her fingers. Though the day was just a glow on the horizon, the night air remained warm. She stared across to the lights of Boston. “This is wonderful.”

  “It sold me on the place.” Cade closed the slider and crossed to where Ryan stood. He leaned against the rail. “So talk to me.”

  “What about?”

  He tilted his head and looked at her. “When I’m in negotiations with someone and they make a one-hundred-and-eighty degree turn for no apparent reason, I usually get suspicious.”

  Ryan’s eyes narrowed. “We’re not in negotiations.”

  “Oh no?”

  Leaning against the waist high barrier in the fading dusk, Ryan stared out into the evening. Instead of the lights of Manhattan, she saw the lights along the Charles River. This time there was no moonlight, but the city lights set up a glow about them. She took a sip of her wine and relaxed fractionally.

  Cade watched an evening jogger run down the trail by the river, safety beacon bobbing up and down in the dusk. “Wasn’t it just last week we were on a balcony standing just about like this?” He took a drink and set his glass on the broad wooden railing. “I seem to recall someone telling me she didn’t want to sleep with me just to scratch an itch.”

  Ryan raised her chin. “Maybe I changed my mind. If we just set some rules up front—”

  “Ah, rules again.”

  Her eyes flashed. “You have a problem with that?”

  “They didn’t help last time.” He reached over to toy with her hair.

  “Maybe if you’d followed them they would have. Maybe then we wouldn’t be standing here having this conversation.” She thumped the wineglass down on the railing.

  Before she could react he’d pulled her close, his smile quick and dangerous. “Sooner or later we would have had this conversation no matter what.”

  “Let me go,” Ryan hissed.

  He ignored her. “I thought you came here to have sex,” he said, tracing his fingertips down her throat and into the V of her collar. “Seems to me like holding you ought to be part of the proceedings. Personally, I kind of like holding you.” His hands slid down her back, molding her to him. “It’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. That’s the point of all this, isn’t it? Burn it out, you said.” He nibbled a line of kisses over her jaw. “That’s going to take some doing.”

  Ryan felt every inch of his body against hers, felt his arousal growing. The barrier around the balcony was a solid wall behind her. His hands were warmer than the night air, heating her skin through the thin cloth of her blouse. Under his touch, her frustration melted away. It felt so right to be here with him, no matter what happened after. Ryan caught herself. What was she, nuts? Cade ran a hand back up to tangle in her hair, pulling her head back to plunder her mouth. “Wait,” she managed. “We need to make sure we both agree on what’s going on here.”

  He stopped for a moment. “Back to the rules, hmm?” She felt his lips rub lightly, teasingly against hers, then nibble across her cheek. “Okay. Rule number one, we get to be naked together as often as we both want. And I can tell you right now, I’m going to want it a lot,” he whispered, then his lips took possession of hers and pulled her away on a whirling journey of passion. Hot and demanding, his mouth plundered hers ruthlessly until arousal pulsed through every cell of her body. The rough scrape of his beard against her chin inflamed her. His hands were in her hair. He tempted her to give, then to take until she was dizzy with pleasure.

  There had been a point when she’d thought she could turn away from this whirlwind of sensation, the night she’d walked away at the Beacon Hill Hotel. Now she knew she’d been fooling herself to think she could do without this feeling. To think that she could do without him. It was impossible to consider walking away now. She’d been running to this point since she’d seen him in the conference room at Beckman Markham. However much she tried to convince herself otherwise, he’d written himself indelibly into her mind and onto her body. With his mouth on hers, she met him with a moan.

  “Rule number two,” Cade murmured as he broke the kiss to nibble her earlobe, “we get to have each other any way we want to.” His hands stroked down over her breasts, hot and demanding, sliding over to free the top buttons on her blouse one by one. The fabric parted and his fingers were on the warm curves of lace-covered flesh, making her catch her breath. She pressed herself against him with abandon, feeling the warmth of his hands contrast with the tepid evening air. Then he slid his hand up slightly, and she could feel her heart pounding against his palm.

  Passion dragged him beyond gentleness and she followed willingly. This was the product of days of longing and nights of pent-up desire, this maelstrom of passion that had overtaken them both. Caught in the whirling frenzy, she could only cling to him, closing her mouth over his as though they could breathe through each other. His touch was rough and she gloried in it. She felt his hands sliding her skirt up around her hips, heard his murmur of approval as his finger slipped over the tops of her stockings to run up the garters she wore. The stroke of his fingertips over the soft flesh made her shiver. The thought drifted through her head that she should tell him to stop, but the words turned into a moan and she ran her hands up his back to rake them through his hair.

  “Rule number three, no backing out tomorrow.” God, how had he managed to keep his hands off of her when she felt so gloriously, wonderfully right, Cade wondered as Ryan ran feverish kisses down his neck. After weeks of watching her and wondering, the answer was that the reality made his memories pale in comparison. She unbuttoned his shirt, sliding her smooth hands against his chest and he groaned at the brush of her skin over his nipples. She tempted him to push farther, to take them both to the edge and beyond.

  Ryan gasped as his clever fingers slipped under the edge of her lacy bikini underwear to find her slick and hot. He stroked her there and she writhed against him. “O
h,” she gasped and parted her legs to give him better access. Then his fingers were pulling the scrap of lace between them aside, driving her up toward the point of absolute pleasure. Dimly, she heard the sound of his zipper, and he pulled her up until her legs were wrapped around his waist, her back braced against the barrier.

  “Rule number four,” Cade said in her ear, his voice strained, his breath ragged. “I get to have you. Now.”

  13

  HIS MOUTH WAS on hers, taking, devouring. Then he raised his head. “Let’s get inside,” he said. “Hold on tight.” With her still wrapped around him, he turned and walked across the balcony to the slider, then stepped inside. A swath of moonlight from the skylight shone across the bed and up one wall. He crossed the room and tumbled Ryan back onto the smooth cotton coverlet.

  She’d barely registered the feeling of the bed beneath her before he was on her. His hands were relentless, touching her, sliding against her until she moved her hips without volition, crying out, caught up in sensation. He was hot and hard against her, his mouth bruising hers. Gone was any pretense at gentleness. Now it was only naked desire and insatiable hunger that drove them both, as he pushed her up, up and over the edge in a burst of exquisite pleasure that only left her wanting more.Even as the aftershocks coursed through her, she felt Cade lean away from her and heard the sound of a drawer opening. Then he was back against her, pushing up her skirt, stripping off her lacy briefs. She gloried in his urgency, as she tore open the buttons of his jeans, reaching in to feel the hardness and pulsing heat in her hand, unbearably aroused by knowing that he wanted her so much. She heard the crackle of plastic and then he moved her hand away to sheath his shuddering erection.

  And sank himself into her in a slick rush that tore the breath from her lungs.

  Nothing that had come before had prepared her for this. The climax from moments ago had been just a teaser for the sensation that overwhelmed her now. The pressure of his body, the exquisite friction of him sliding in and out of her combined in a glorious molten flow of pleasure. His face was pure and tight with desire. The tightening began again in her body, intensifying with every stroke until she was clinging to him mindlessly, legs wrapped around his waist, fingers clutching the sweat-slick muscles of his back as they bunched and flowed. She gasped as she felt him thicken, heard him groan, and then he was surging against her, impaling her on the mattress even as she shuddered with her own ecstasy.

  CADE ROLLED OFF onto his side, sliding out of her in a slick rush that only made him hard again.

  “Where—”“Shh.” He leaned over her and kissed her long and lingeringly. “God, you’re amazing. All I want to do is make love with you again.” He backed away to strip his shirt and jeans off, then came back to her. “But first, we’ve got to get you out of all these clothes.” He traced his tongue down her neck, unfastening the remaining buttons on her blouse. Stripping it off, he tossed it to the floor. The low-cut lace bra she wore beneath was anything but demure. Ryan reached down and unsnapped the front clasp and Cade peeled the cups back to uncover the smooth, soft skin of her breasts.

  The silky soft feel of his tongue in contrast with the rough scrape of his beard did delicious things to her. Ryan ran her hands down his arms, glorying in the feel of the smooth, hard muscle, then gasped as his tongue teased first one then the other nipple to a tight, hard point. She raised her hips to help him strip off her skirt and the scrap of lace she wore beneath, leaving her clad only in stockings and garter belt.

  He lay on the bed next to her, amazed at the luxury of her smooth warmth pressed against him. This was what he hadn’t been able to get out of his mind, the heat and intimacy of being close to her. He ran his hand lightly down her body, his fingers rising and falling over her breast, fanning out over the slight curve of hip. One at a time, he unsnapped her garters and pushed the stockings off.

  “Right now, I just want to feel you,” he whispered. He leaned in to kiss her, and the feel of her warm, mobile mouth under his excited him again.

  The hard length of him nudged her thigh. Ryan reached down and wrapped her fingers around him until he shuddered, amazed at the fact that she could arouse him so.

  Ryan stared up at his shadowed face as he moved to lie between her legs.

  He’d imagined this moment so many times. None of it even came close to the pure glory he felt as he looked into her eyes and drove himself into her, sliding in so slick and fast it took his breath away. For an instant, he stayed absolutely still, lost in the pleasure and heat, lost in being a part of her. Then slowly, slowly he began to move.

  The sensation threatened to overwhelm him, but he’d sworn that he would savor the experience, he would give them both a chance to absorb what they were feeling before it was over. He felt Ryan tightening around him, moaning, her fingers clinging to his shoulders. Higher and higher they rode the motion until he pushed both of them over the peak to plummet in a spinning spiral of pleasure, crying out with release.

  The warm weight of his body was an intimacy beyond description, Ryan thought drowsily as she floated into sleep feeling him still a part of her. Cade pressed a kiss to her temple and followed her down.

  THE BRIGHT LIGHT OF morning flooded into the room, pulling Ryan into wakefulness. She became vividly aware of the warmth of Cade’s body behind her as she lay spooned against him. Every nerve ending registering the texture of his skin, memories of the night just past crowding in on each other.

  She may have been celibate for eight years, but in the previous hours they’d made up for lost time. The night had been a pattern of making love, then dozing long enough to make love again. Each time they had dropped off, one of them awoke enough to brush a caress over skin sensitized to the touch, starting the cycle all over again. Desire gave way to laughter, which dissolved back into blazing passion in the blink of an eye.It was amazing, and she wanted more.

  It was terrifying, and she had no idea what came next. How would it be when he awoke? They hadn’t come close to hashing things out the night before and she had no idea what to expect from him. Going to bed and getting it over with had sounded like a good idea when she started out for his condo, but now here she was in bed with him, and her desire for him was far, far from burned out. All she was certain of was that she wanted more.

  Cade muttered in his sleep and pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her.

  She’d never woken with a lover before, never been in a man’s bed with the coming of dawn. Her feeble college experience, utterly meaningless in retrospect, had begun and ended one night after a party. She had no experience greeting the morning with another. After a lifetime of waking alone, the reality of waking in the arms of her lover was utterly extraordinary.

  Nerves gradually began to erode the golden glow, though. How Cade felt, where things stood now, she had no clue. She’d come to his house intending to talk first and act later. Instead, they’d fallen into bed without sorting anything out, with no more understanding of where things stood than the first time they’d been together. Who knew what he was expecting? She’d said burn out the chemistry. Maybe it was done for him, in which case waking up in his bed was too embarrassing to contemplate. Ryan craned her neck to look for the clock and saw it blink to 6:10 a.m. She had a nine o’clock class to teach and she was halfway across town from her apartment and a change of clothes. What had she been thinking of?

  Anxiety dug its fingers into her as she tried to ease out of the bed without waking him. He only pressed his lips against her in sleepy reflex and tightened his arms in response. She pulled against him again, scooting toward the edge of the bed. Finally, she managed to slip loose. He turned over, and sank back into sleep.

  Ryan padded quietly across the bedroom floor, fishing for garments she recognized from the tangle of cloth strewn on the floor. Slipping into the bathroom, she closed the door with a quiet click and snapped on the light. She had the bare minimum of clothes to make her decent, though her garter belt had somehow gone missing, not to mention
her underwear. Hastily, she washed in the sink then slipped into her clothes, smoothing her skirt down over her hips, her hands echoing the feel of his touch. She glanced at herself in the mirror and a goofy smile spread across her face. No matter what came next, it had been a glorious night.

  Quietly, she turned off the light and opened the door to see Cade still sleeping. She walked quietly across the room, bending to retrieve her shoes. Spying one of her stockings tossed in a corner, she scooped it up and looked around for its companion. Then she spied the end of the garter belt. Of her underwear, there was no sign, but it was little enough to sacrifice.

  She stopped and stared a moment at Cade’s sleeping profile. Leaning down, she brushed the barest of kisses over his temple, then turned to go.

  And an arm swept around her waist from behind.

  “Running out on me?”

  Surprise sent adrenaline rocketing through her system even as she registered his voice, rough with sleep. Before she could react, he pulled her back onto the bed for a long, lingering kiss.

  The kiss reignited all the need she’d felt the night before. Far from being burned out, the wanting was sharper, more vivid for knowing just what she was missing in all its particulars.

  Cade broke the kiss off and looked at her. “The rules said no backing out in the morning.”

  “I have to get to work.” Ryan pulled away to stand up.

  Cade followed her, pulling her close to him again. “Saying goodbye doesn’t take long.”

  “I wasn’t sure we’d have much to say this morning. We said we’d burn it out. I thought maybe last night was enough.”

  “To burn this out? I don’t think so.” He began unbuttoning the front of her blouse. “I don’t know about you, darlin’, but I’m very far from burned out on this. In fact, I think we’re going to have to try a whole lot harder to get through this because right now I’ve got a regular bonfire going.”