Crumble and Custard and Other Puppy Tales

by Jenny Dale

  “Of course she does!” Gus growled as he crunched up all the crisps the children were giving him. “But I’m still hungry!”

  Gus stayed until all the crisps were finished, then moved on. Mr Graham, who lived at Number 7, wasn’t at home, but Gus got some chicken from Mrs Patel at Number 9 and a rusk from the baby at Number 11.

  By now, Gus was beginning to feel quite full. He decided it was time to go home. There was only one house left in the row anyway, and it wasn’t on Gus’s usual round. Mrs Wilson, who lived at Number 13, didn’t like dogs. Instead she had a snooty white Persian cat called Lulu, who walked up and down the street with her nose in the air.

  Gus was about to head for home when he smelt something. He stopped in his tracks and sniffed. He sniffed again. It was a delicious smell, warm and fruity and spicy. And it was coming from Mrs Wilson’s house.

  Gus had to find out what it was. He hurried back across the lawn of Number 11 to look for a gap in the fence he’d noticed, leading into Mrs Wilson’s garden.

  It was rather a squeeze, but Gus managed to push his way through. The kitchen door stood open, and the smell was getting stronger and more delicious by the minute.

  Gus crept up to the doorway and peeped inside. He didn’t want to meet Mrs Wilson or Lulu. But the kitchen was empty.

  Something was bubbling away in a big pan on top of the cooker and, on the big wooden table, Gus could see a big cake and lots of little pies and tarts, cooling on a wire rack.

  Licking his lips, Gus padded softly into the kitchen. He jumped up onto one of the kitchen chairs and put his paws on the table. He didn’t know where to start! As well as the cake, there were custard tarts – another of Gus’s favourites. And next to a big bowl of pastry mix with a wooden spoon stuck in it, Gus spotted chocolate chip cookies!

  But the big sponge cake with jam in the middle was nearest. Just as Gus opened his mouth to take a big bite out of it, Mrs Wilson walked into the kitchen with Lulu in her arms.

  “Eeek!” Mrs Wilson screamed when she saw Gus. “Get away from my cake, you horrid little dog!”

  “How dare you come into my house!” Lulu hissed at him, showing her sharp teeth.

  Frightened, Gus jumped down and ran for the door. He rushed back through the gap in the fence into Number 11’s garden, and through all the other gardens, not stopping until he was safely back home.

  “Gus, I’ve been looking for you!” Holly said as Gus trotted into the kitchen. “Where’ve you been?”

  “I can guess,” said Mrs Carter. “On his usual round of visits to the neighbours!”

  “Gus, have you been begging for food again?” Holly asked sternly.

  Gus opened his eyes wide and tried to look as if he’d never dream of doing such a thing.

  Holly couldn’t help laughing. “You’re a bad boy!” she said, stroking his soft coat.

  “It’s lucky our neighbours like him,” Mrs Carter remarked, “or they’d be complaining all the time!”

  Right at that moment Mrs Wilson burst in through the kitchen door, making everyone, including Gus, jump. She was red in the face and looked very upset indeed.

  “Is something wrong, Mrs Wilson?” Holly asked.

  “Yes, something’s very wrong!” Mrs Wilson said angrily. “I want to complain about your dog. He’s eaten my diamond ring!”

  Chapter Two

  “What?” gasped Holly and Mrs Carter together.

  Gus looked puzzled. He didn’t even know what a diamond ring was. But whatever it was, he was sure he hadn’t eaten it. He hadn’t eaten anything in Mrs Wilson’s kitchen.

  “He’s eaten my diamond ring!” Mrs Wilson said again.

  “Gus wouldn’t eat a ring,” Holly said.

  “Why not?” Mrs Wilson snapped. “That dog eats anything! He ate all the heads off my daffodils once!”

  “And they tasted horrible!” Gus barked indignantly.

  “Gus, be quiet!” said Mrs Carter. Then she turned to Mrs Wilson. “Why do you think Gus is to blame, Mrs Wilson?” she asked.

  “Because I found him climbing onto my kitchen table about five minutes ago!” Mrs Wilson said crossly. “I’d taken my ring off and left it on the table while I was baking. When I came back, it was gone!”

  Mrs Wilson suddenly looked very sad. “The ring was a present from my husband,” she said quietly. “It’s very precious to me. I simply must get it back.”

  “I’m sorry, Mrs Wilson,” Holly said. “But I’m sure Gus didn’t eat your ring.”

  Gus licked Holly’s hand gratefully.

  Mrs Wilson shook her head. “He must have done!” she declared.

  “It wasn’t me!” Gus howled. “Your stuck-up cat could have eaten the ring!”

  “Be quiet, Gus!” Mrs Carter said sharply.

  Gus shut up. He hadn’t seen Holly’s mum get quite so angry before, and it scared him.

  “I suppose Gus might have eaten the ring,” Mrs Carter said slowly. “He does like to eat very odd things sometimes.”

  “Oh, Mum!” Holly said. “Gus wouldn’t eat a diamond ring. Not if there were cakes and biscuits lying about.”

  “He would have hoovered up everything on the table if I hadn’t walked in just then!” Mrs Wilson said furiously. “That dog’s a menace!”

  Gus couldn’t be quiet any longer, and he barked loudly. It wasn’t fair! He hadn’t eaten Mrs Wilson’s nasty old ring, and he didn’t see why he should get the blame.

  “Gus, be quiet!” shouted Mrs Carter. “Holly, go and shut him in the living room while I talk to Mrs Wilson.”

  “That dog needs to be taught some manners!” Mrs Wilson sniffed.

  “Sit down, Mrs Wilson, and I’ll make you a nice cup of tea,” Holly’s mum said. “Then we can talk about how we can find your ring.”

  Holly took Gus’s collar and pulled him out of the kitchen. Gus dug his claws in because he didn’t want to leave. He wanted to stay there and tell Mrs Wilson exactly what he thought of her. But in the end he gave in, and let Holly take him into the living room.

  “Oh, Gus,” Holly sighed, kneeling down to put her arms around him. “I wish you hadn’t gone into Mrs Wilson’s kitchen.”

  “So do I,” Gus woofed miserably as he snuggled into her arms. “Then I wouldn’t be in this mess!”

  “If only you could talk!” Holly went on, looking just as miserable. “Then you could tell us what really happened.”

  Gus whined, and put his paw on Holly’s arm. He hated to see her so sad. And it was all his fault. That made him feel even worse.

  “I’ll go and see what Mum and Mrs Wilson are saying,” Holly told him. “Be a good boy, Gus, and don’t make a noise.”

  She went out, closing the door behind her. Gus slumped down on the carpet and put his nose between his paws. He felt very sad indeed. If only he hadn’t been so greedy, none of this would have happened. Now he had made Holly unhappy – and he’d made Mrs Carter very angry.

  Suddenly Gus sat up, feeling frightened. What if Mrs Carter was so angry with him that he was sent back to the Dogs’ Home? Gus had been born at the home and had lived there until, one day, the Carters had come looking for a puppy and had chosen him. That had been the happiest day of Gus’s life.

  The Dogs’ Home was big and noisy and crowded. The people there were very busy. They didn’t have time to play with him like Holly did. Gus didn’t want to go back there. Besides, he loved Holly more than anyone else in the whole world, and he didn’t want to leave her. So there was only one thing to do . . .

  Gus jumped up. He must find Mrs Wilson’s diamond ring himself, and show everyone that he hadn’t eaten it!

  Chapter Three

  Gus looked round the living room, wondering how he could get out. The door was closed, but one of the windows was open just a little. Gus knew he wasn’t allowed on the furniture, but this was an emergency. He leapt onto the big armchair near the window and scrambled up its back and onto the windowsill.

  Gus nudged the window open a little wide
r with his nose and looked out. It seemed an awfully long way down and he felt rather nervous about jumping. But then Gus remembered Holly’s sad face. He took a deep breath, jumped . . .

  . . . and landed safely in the soft earth of the flowerbed beneath the window.

  “Yes!” he barked proudly. “I did it!”

  Gus picked himself up and trotted down the garden path. There was no time to waste. He had to get to Mrs Wilson’s house and find the ring before something awful happened to him.

  “Hey, Gus!” Jock was in the Burtons’ back garden, chewing on a large juicy bone. He looked up as Gus raced past. “Do you want a lick? There’s plenty here for two!”

  Gus shook his head. “I’m not hungry!” he called, and didn’t stop. He didn’t care if he never saw a bone again, as long as he didn’t have to leave Holly and go back to the Dogs’ Home.

  Jock was so surprised he dropped the bone. It rolled into the Burtons’ fish pond, and Jock didn’t even notice. “Gus isn’t hungry?” he barked. “I don’t believe it!”

  When Gus reached the gap in the fence leading to Mrs Wilson’s garden he skidded to a halt, panting hard. Then he squeezed through the gap and trotted up the path to the kitchen door, looking carefully around him in case Mrs Wilson was already on her way back home.

  But this time the kitchen door was closed. Gus’s heart sank. He should have guessed that Mrs Wilson would lock up her house before she left. But he had to find a way in. He had to.

  Keeping a nervous lookout for Lulu, Gus went to investigate the back of the house. Gus wasn’t the only dog in the street who was scared of Lulu. He’d seen the hefty white cat take on dogs before. She sent them running home with their tails between their legs as soon as she lashed out with her razor-sharp claws. But luckily Lulu was nowhere to be seen.

  All the windows at the back of the house were closed. Gus ran up and down trying to find a way in, but there was not even a tiny gap he could squeeze through.

  Gloomily Gus went back to the kitchen door again. What was he going to do? Somehow he had to get into that house, or he might be back in the Dogs’ Home before he could say “Woof”. And then he’d never see Holly again . . .

  Gus whined and stood up on his back legs, putting his front paws on the kitchen door. He pushed at it as hard as he could, but it didn’t move. It was then that Gus noticed something at the bottom of the door. Lulu’s cat flap!

  Gus was so excited that he had to stop himself from barking out loud. Eagerly he pushed his nose against the flap. It moved, and Gus stuck his head through into Mrs Wilson’s kitchen. Now for the rest of him . . .

  Carefully Gus began to make his way through the hole in the door. He wriggled and he pushed and he just about got his front paws and shoulders inside. It was a very tight fit.

  Gus tried to get his other half through the cat flap. He wriggled and he pulled, but he couldn’t move. He tried again and again, but his tummy was too big to get through the hole. He was stuck!

  Gus began to feel very frightened. He didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t get in and he couldn’t get out.

  Then behind him he heard a silky voice say, “And what do you think you’re doing in my cat flap?”

  Chapter Four

  It was Lulu! Gus began to tremble with fear.

  “You look very silly indeed,” Lulu said. Gus could almost hear her sharpening her claws gleefully. “I think you’d better come out, right now.”

  “I can’t!” Gus whined miserably. “I’m stuck!”

  “Serves you right for eating the diamond ring!” Lulu sniffed.

  “I didn’t eat it!” Gus said indignantly. “I’ve come to look for it. And – and I’ve got to find it because if I don’t, I might get sent back to the Dogs’ Home and then I’ll never see Holly again . . .”

  Lulu didn’t say anything, and Gus began to feel even more nervous. He couldn’t see what the cat was doing behind him, but he didn’t want to stay and find out. He began to wriggle about again, trying to get through the cat flap into Mrs Wilson’s kitchen.

  “Keep still!” Lulu hissed at him. “You’ll never get in that way – you’re too fat! You’d better try and come out again.”

  Gus knew that Lulu was right. He was just too big to get through the cat flap. “But I can’t get out again either!” he wailed.

  “Yes, you can!” Lulu said crossly. “You got in, didn’t you? Just take it slowly.”

  Gus began trying to ease himself gently backwards. At first he didn’t move at all. He pulled harder . . . and harder . . . Then, all of a sudden, he shot backwards out of the cat flap like a cork out of a bottle, and tumbled head over heels onto the path.

  “Thank you!” he woofed.

  Lulu, who was having a wash, gave him a bored look. “Dogs!” she yawned. “They’re so stupid! I can show you a much better way to get into the house.”

  Gus stared at the cat in amazement.

  “You want to get into the house, don’t you?” Lulu jumped onto a dustbin which stood underneath the kitchen windows. She began pulling at the smallest window with her claws and, after a minute or two, it swung open.

  “The catch is broken,” explained Lulu as she leapt down onto the path again. “If you can get up there, you can climb into the kitchen quite easily.”

  Gus could hardly believe his ears. Lulu, the cat who hated dogs, was helping him?

  “Thank you!” he said. “But – but why are you helping me like this?”

  “I came from the Cats’ Home,” Lulu said quietly. “I wouldn’t want to go back there either!”

  The dustbin was quite tall, but there was a big black bag of rubbish lying next to it. Gus climbed onto the bag first and then managed to get onto the dustbin. From there, it was easy for him to jump up onto the windowsill.

  He peered through the window into Mrs Wilson’s kitchen. Just below him was the sink and draining board, which was piled with clean plates and cups.

  Gus hopped down carefully onto the edge of the sink, but felt his front paw skidding on the slippery surface. CRASH!

  As Gus knocked against the pile of crockery, plates and cups flew everywhere and smashed to bits as they hit the floor.

  “I think that’s called a crash landing,” Lulu remarked as she came in through the cat flap.

  “Oh, no!” Gus muttered. “How did that happen?” He inspected his paw. He’d trodden on a drop of spilt washing-up liquid. No wonder he’d slipped!

  He jumped down off the draining board. It wasn’t a very good start. Still, he was sure Mrs Wilson would forgive him if he found her diamond ring.

  “Where are you going to start looking?” Lulu asked.

  “I . . . er . . . don’t quite know.” Gus suddenly realised that he didn’t even know what a diamond ring was.

  Lulu sighed. “You do know what a diamond ring is, don’t you?”

  “No,” said Gus sadly.

  Lulu told him. Gus couldn’t help feeling alarmed when he found out how small it was. He looked around the enormous kitchen. How would he find a tiny little thing like a diamond ring in here? But he had to try, for Holly’s sake.

  First Gus went over to the kitchen table. He remembered that Mrs Wilson said she’d left her ring there when she’d started cooking. All the cakes and biscuits and the big bowl of pastry mix were still there, but Gus wasn’t interested in food. He jumped up onto a chair and nosed around, looking for the ring.

  CRASH! Lulu jumped as Gus accidentally knocked the plate of chocolate chip cookies onto the floor.

  “Be careful!” she hissed.

  Gus didn’t care. He had to find that ring. But there was no sign of it on the kitchen table.

  Next Gus sniffed his way all round the kitchen floor, in case the ring had fallen off the table. It hadn’t.

  Then he looked in all the cupboards he could reach. It wasn’t easy, because it took him a long time to get each one open. The cupboards were so full of tins, bottles and packets of food that things kept falling out onto the floor. />
  Meanwhile, Lulu looked in all the places Gus couldn’t reach, like the top of the fridge and the high shelves on the wall. But they didn’t find the ring.

  “It’s not here!” Gus slumped down miserably on the kitchen floor. “What am I going to do?”

  “We’d better get out of here,” Lulu said, looking around the kitchen, “or we’re going to be in big trouble.”

  Gus looked around the kitchen too, and his heart sank. It was a mess. The floor was covered with bits of broken crockery and cookies, along with tins and packets of food. What on earth would Mrs Wilson say when she saw it?

  Lulu was right. They had to get out of there, and fast – before Mrs Wilson came back.

  Then, suddenly, Gus’s ears pricked up. He could hear Holly’s voice! He listened harder. Now he could hear Mrs Carter and Mrs Wilson talking as well. The voices were coming closer and closer. Gus could hear footsteps too.

  Mrs Wilson and Holly and her mum were walking up the path to Mrs Wilson’s kitchen door!

  Gus panicked. He ran over to the sink, but the draining board was too high for him to jump onto.

  “Hide!” Lulu hissed, her tail swinging wildly from side to side.

  Gus looked frantically around for somewhere to hide, but it was too late. The voices were already outside the back door!

  Chapter Five

  “But I’ve looked everywhere,” Mrs Wilson was saying, as she put her key into the lock. “I tell you, that puppy of yours must have eaten it!”

  “Gus can be a bit naughty at times, Mrs Wilson,” Holly admitted, “but I’m sure he wouldn’t have eaten your ring.”

  “Let’s have another look for it,” Mrs Carter added. “Holly and I will help you.”

  “It won’t do any good,” Mrs Wilson sniffed, sounding rather tearful as she pushed open the kitchen door. “I know exactly where my ring is – inside your dog’s tummy! I’m never going to get it back . . .” The door swung open.