Loose

by Coo Sweet

  She and Sage had been hanging out a lot lately. They often shared a table at lunch, and it wasn’t unusual for them to spend afternoons or evenings rehashing their daily activities on the phone with one another.

  That particular day, they kidded around in the parking lot on their way into the mall.

  “Ugh--remember the first time we went to the mall together?” asked Raven.

  “Uh…yeah. How could I forget? You threw up all over my brand new Jordans,” Sage teased. He screwed his face up at the memory of it. “It took me days of scrubbing to get the stains and the stink off them.”

  Raven responded to his jab with a weird look on her face. She felt like kicking herself. Way to go, girl. Just what you want to think about right now-—this shit you’ve gotten yourself into!

  “I had a stomach bug. You can’t blame me for that,” she said, and pinched herself hard as a reminder to be cool.

  The two of them window shopped at various stores. Sage bought several t-shirts from a funky little boutique with a Rasta motif. Raven squealed and gushed over a few things, but hadn’t made a single purchase by the time they were ready to go.

  “You feeling okay?” Sage asked, out of the blue.

  A shadow fell across Raven’s face. Damn. Am I doing it again? Does he suspect something? She checked his expression for clues to what he might be thinking. She expected the worst, but his body language was loose and carefree. Raven pinched herself again. Stop being so paranoid.

  “I’m fine. Why?” she asked, her voice quavering a little.

  “Because I know how much you like to shop, and you haven’t bought a single thing,” said Sage. As soon as the words left his mouth, he wished he could yank them back. Duh--maybe she’s short on cash, stupid. Be cool.

  But Raven didn’t seem to mind. In fact, she breathed a sigh of relief when she realized what he’d been referring to. Good. ‘Cause this isn’t the time or the place for me to tell him, she thought.

  She snuggled up to Sage squeezing his arm playfully.

  “Oh, I saw some cute stuff. Nothing I just had to have though,” she said.

  “Some cute stuff,” Sage teased, in a syrupy falsetto. He clapped his hands in short bursts. “Why is everything cute to girls?”

  Raven smirked, punched him in the arm.

  “Owww. Watch that, girl. You know you’ve got some heavy hands,” said Sage.

  “Then hush and stop messing with me, before I really hurt you,” said Raven.

  “Ooo..promise?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows like an old letch.

  “Yeah. I promise,” said Raven.

  Sage steered the truck out of the mall parking lot. He looked content, comfortable--definitely a big contrast from Raven. She stared idly outside the passenger side window with her head resting on the glass. Like the deep thoughts swirling around her brain weighed a ton.

  “You hungry?” Sage asked.

  The sound of his voice snapped Raven out of her reverie.

  “Yeah, I could eat,” she said.

  “Cool, let’s get something.”

  Sage drove to a deli nearby. He went inside to order while Raven waited in the truck. She shifted uneasily in her seat gnawing at her cuticles. Then she cursed under her breath when she made one bleed. Finally she stuck her hands in her pockets to keep them safe from her nervous nibbling.

  When Sage got back to the truck they drove to a neighborhood park. He spread a blanket on the grass for them to lounge on, and they dug into the food. The park was brimming with families, couples cuddling, and lots of outdoor sports fanatics.

  “Uh, this is so good,” Raven said, relishing her sub sandwich. She picked at Sage’s bag of chips--she’d already inhaled hers.

  “Yeah, I can tell. The way you’re slamming it down, you act like you’re eating for two!” Sage joked.

  Raven’s complexion turned pale. She coughed to keep from choking on the bite of food in her mouth. She stopped chewing, and set her sandwich down.

  Damn, man. Stop saying stupid stuff like that, Sage silently chastised himself.

  “Just kidding. You hardly ate at lunchtime. Of course you’re hungry,” he said.

  Raven smiled tightly at his attempt to smooth things over. She wrapped up the rest of her food, wiped her hands on a napkin.

  “Well, I’m full now. You ready to go?” She stifled a small belch with the back of her hand. The gesture made her snicker self-consciously.

  “Excuse me!” she said.

  Sage grinned. Then he purposely let out a whopper of a burp himself.

  “Yeah, excuse me, too,” he said.

  Raven waved a hand in front of her face.

  “Dang, boy…was that a vurp? I smelled it way over here. Gross!”

  “Sorry!” he said, happy that he’d lightened things up.

  While Raven and Sage enjoyed each other’s company, Jasmin was home alone. Miserable. She held the phone to her ear. Her face was streaked with tears. Her dad, Lance Grace, was on the other end.

  “How am I supposed to trust you, Daddy? Everything’s turned upside down because of you. Mom tries to be strong, but I hear her crying at night. You broke her heart, you know? Mine, too. How could you do that to us?”

  “I was stupid, baby. Stupid. Selfish. Arrogant. I let my ego jeopardize the two biggest blessings in my life. And I deserve to pay for that, but I’m begging you, Jas. Please don’t turn your back on me. Let me fix this. Can you do that?” Lance begged.

  Jasmin took a deep breath. She clutched her chest like it would help hold the broken pieces of her heart together.

  “I don’t know, Daddy. I really don’t know.”

  “Just think about it, Jas. At least give me that much consideration.”

  Her dad’s pitiful, pleading tone sent her off the edge. Tears started rolling before she could even think to curse them away. Jasmin wiped her cheeks with a heavy hand.

  “I have to go, Daddy. I’m sorry,” she sobbed, and hung up before Lance could get another word in, but she didn’t set the phone down right away. She cradled it to her chest all the while imagining the warmth she felt in her palm was somehow seeping from her dad to her.

  As much as she tried to deny it, Jasmin missed her father. He had always made her feel so confident and loved. So safe.

  Now, being separated from him, she felt like a small, frightened girl unsure of every step, reluctant to trust her instincts, terrified of opening her heart to the wrong person.

  Chapter 16

  Sage sat at his kitchen table tackling homework. Raven sat across from him. He was bent over a thick textbook, wielding a high-lighter with furious speed. She watched him intently and shook her head in jest.

  "You know the trick is to highlight the important stuff, right? Not color the whole page," Raven said.

  Sage looked up and smirked. He threw a wad of paper in her direction, and it hit her in the face.

  "Oops, sorry!" he laughed.

  Raven flipped him off then threw the paper back at him. She tried to focus on the book in front of her, but gave up after less than a minute. She slammed the book shut.

  "That's it. I can't do this anymore," she complained.

  Sage looked up from his work again.

  "What?" he asked.

  Raven pointed to the books and papers scattered around her.

  "I’m done...brain cells are fried. Give me a ride home?"

  "Sure. I need a break, too."

  Sage got up, stretched, and grabbed his keys off the counter. Raven stuffed her gear in her backpack. Sage helped clear their snacks off the table.

  "Ma!" he yelled. Nadine walked in from behind him.

  "
Boy, stop yelling. I’m right here. What do you want?"

  "I'm taking Raven home, okay?"

  "Okay. Bye, Raven."

  "Bye, Mrs. Gentry. Thanks for letting me come over."

  "Of course, sweetie. You’re welcome anytime. Come straight back, Sage. Dinner will be ready soon," Nadine said.

  "Alright." Sage guided Raven out the door with a protective hand on her back.

  They sat parked in front of Raven's house with the engine running.

  "This was a good day. Thanks for hanging with me," said Sage.

  Raven didn't answer. She fidgeted with the strap of her purse. Wrapped it tightly around her finger, unwrapped it, wrapped it tight again.

  "You okay?" Sage asked.

  Raven nodded yes. A tear drop fell from the corner of her eye and contradicted that.

  "Hey, what's wrong?" Sage scooted toward her. He clasped her shoulder, squeezed it. Raven shook her head. More tears ran down her face.

  "Come on, Rav. What's up? Your granny’s not hitting you again, is she?" Sage asked.

  Raven raised her head and looked him square in the eyes. She took a gigantic breath, like she was getting ready to sail off the high dive at a swimming pool. Then she just jumped right in with both feet.

  "I'm pregnant," she whispered.

  Sage’s eyes bucked. His jaw dropped. He struggled to catch a breath as if he’d been dunked in the same pool of turmoil Raven had dived into.

  "Uh-uh! No. You're kidding, right?" Sage gasped.

  Raven’s shoulders heaved. She sobbed out loud.

  "You said it was safe, Raven. What the hell--"

  Sage banged the steering wheel with the heel of his hand.

  “Dammit!” he said.

  "I know. I’m sorry. I thought it was safe," Raven sobbed louder.

  "How could you let this happen?" asked Sage.

  Something in his tone, and the words he spat at her, struck the wrong nerve in Raven. She put the brakes on the waterworks and pulled on the boxing gloves instead.

  "Me? You were there too. Remember?" Raven snapped.

  "Yeah, but you kept pressing me to do it. You were itching for a piece of me from day one. At the movies. My house. Here," Sage said, repeatedly stabbing his finger in the air. He banged the steering wheel again.

  "So this is my fault? That what you’re saying?"

  "No…I…what are we supposed to do now, Raven? Huh? Tell me what the hell we’re supposed to do?”

  “I don’t know. We deal with it, Sage. It’s not like this has never happened before.”

  Sage looked at her like she’d just sprouted a second head.

  “It’s never happened to me before. You think it’s that easy, huh? Having a kid? My whole life could be totally jacked up behind this and you’re telling me we just deal with it?” Sage bellowed.

  Raven flinched from the veracity of his words. Sage sank down in his seat. He swiped a hand across his face--turned back to her.

  “How do you even know it's mine?” he demanded.

  Oh, hell no! What did he say that for?

  Raven’s nostrils flared. Her eyes flickered with fire, and she swung on him like she wanted to take his frigging head off.

  Luckily, Sage was quick enough to block her punch. He pushed her against the seat. The second he let go, she slapped at him with both hands. He put his arms up to block the blows.

  "Girl, are you crazy? Cut that shit out!" he warned her.

  Raven stopped swinging. Her chest heaved up and down. She clenched and unclenched her fists.

  "Oh, it's yours, Sage. Believe that! And you better figure something out. Pretty damn soon."

  He narrowed his eyes at her.

  "Was this what you were after all along? You plan--" he said.

  Before he could finish, Raven slapped his mouth. Hard enough to draw blood. Sage grabbed her arms and shook her until her teeth rattled. The sight of her head whipping back and forth, along with the terror in her eyes, snapped him to his senses. Sage let go of her in a flash. Raven sagged in the seat, crying.

  Suddenly there was a bang on Sage’s window. He and Raven jumped at the intrusion. Somebody yanked open the truck door.

  It was Raven’s nosy neighbor. She grabbed Sage by his shirt collar.

  "Boy, if you don’t get your hands off that girl! I called the cops. You leave her be,” she screamed at him.

  In the distance a siren wailed. Soon, flashing red and blue lights filled the interior of the truck and splashed across Sage and Raven’s already distorted faces.

  Sage was backed against the truck. He faced a cop who scribbled in a small notebook. Raven stood a few feet away from them, on the sidewalk. The nosy neighbor was beside her, an arm draped protectively over Raven’s shoulder.

  "You okay, honey?" the neighbor asked.

  Raven nodded--even though her eyes were red and glazed, her hair looked bushwhacked, and her clothes were all rumpled. She wiped away a trail of tears, but it did little to enhance her majorly jacked up appearance.

  "Sir, do you want to press charges?" the cop asked.

  "This girl is the one who should be pressing charges!" snapped the neighbor.

  "Ma'am, I told you before. He's the one with a visible injury. I don't see any marks on her."

  "And I told you, I saw him hit her," said the neighbor.

  "Ma’am, you said he shook her."

  "Shook…hit…what's the difference? He put his hands on her," the neighbor said, waving the cop’s comment off like she didn’t have the patience for such dumb-assed details.

  "And she put her hands on him. That I can see," the cop said. He pointed to Sage's mouth.

  "I could take them both in. Would that would make you happy?"

  "No!" Sage and Raven both yelled.

  "I don't want to press charges. It was a misunderstanding. That's all. I really need to get home. My parents are probably going crazy by now," Sage added.

  "Just a few more minutes, sir. Then you can go," said the cop.

  He resumed writing then snapped the notebook shut. He handed Sage his driver's license, then walked over to Raven.

  "Miss, I'm not sure what happened here, but I suggest you refrain from hitting anyone else. I'm filing a report of this. If we get another call of this nature you might not be so lucky. That young man is probably doing you a big favor," the cop said.

  Raven glared at Sage. The neighbor glared at the cop.

  "Don't worry, officer. It won't happen again. Can I go inside now?" Raven asked. The cop passed her school I.D. back to her.

  "Okay, you're free to go, Miss." The cop walked back to Sage. "You can go, too. Hopefully she just needs to cool off and then this will all blow over," said the cop.

  Sage nodded. He looked in Raven's direction, but she was already over the threshold of her door. The nosy neighbor was walking home. Sage climbed in his truck. He started the engine, and pulled off. The cop pulled off right behind him.

  Chapter 17

  Nadine sat in the kitchen drinking coffee. She thumbed through a magazine without really seeing a single thing on the pages when she heard the garage door go up. She slammed the magazine shut and marched to the kitchen door. Her pinched face was the first thing Sage saw when he rushed in.

  Nadine launched into her tirade before he even took his hand off the doorknob.

  "Where have you been, Sage? Why didn’t you answer the phone? Do you know how worried I was?"

  "Ma, I'm sorry. I had some trouble at Raven's. Her neighbor called the cops on me."

  "What the hell? Honey!" she yelled for Halloran.

  "Yeah?" he yelled back, fro
m the direction of the den.

  "Get in here!" Nadine snapped.

  "Give me a minute," said Halloran.

  “Dammit, man. If you don’t get your--“

  Nadine bolted toward the den like she fully intended to drag her husband to the kitchen if necessary. Sage just stood there, hands in his pockets and a dazed look on his face.