Emma looked put out and then she grinned. “I like you. It’s one hundred and fifty bones.”
“You mean boners,” Jessie joked.
Emma cracked up and then hugged Jessie tight. “Thanks for not being mad. It was all in good fun.”
“Yes, it was,” Jessie said.
Emma leaned back and studied her. “I’m so glad. So, are you and Zach a thing now?”
Jessie bit her lip. “I don’t know.”
“But you’re going out on a date,” Emma said. “Sam was sure this was the prelim to the two of you getting it on. Needless to say, he lost the bet. I didn’t think it was going to take you two that long, especially being neighbors and all.”
“Yeah, well, we haven’t talked so I don’t know what we are or if we’re anything at all. This could be Zach’s big kiss-off, done in public so I don’t cry.” Jessie hiccupped on the last word, unintentionally giving Emma a glimpse at her upset.
Emma bit her lip. She looked worried. “Oh, Jessie, I wish I could say that wasn’t true.”
“But it is, isn’t it?”
“No . . . uh . . . maybe,” Emma said. “The truth is I don’t know. In all the years I’ve known Zach, he’s never had a girlfriend and the few times Brad and I have talked about it, he didn’t seem to think that Zach ever would again.”
Jessie closed her eyes and blew out a breath. She felt as if her heart were being squeezed by a giant fist.
“Hey, maybe this is Zach trying something new.” Emma put her phone back in her pocket and grabbed Jessie’s hands in hers. “You know, if you want more with Zach, you should just tell him.”
Jessie felt her eyes go wide. “And put myself out there? Oh, I don’t know if I’m ready for that. I kind of feel like I’ve done enough breaking out of my comfort zone for one week. You know what I’m saying?”
Emma laughed. “Agreed. It’s been a big week for you. Okay, let’s make a plan. How do you want to handle this?”
Jessie pictured Zach in the suit waiting for her. She wanted to be with him. Even if it was a kiss-off dinner, it was still a date, and she hadn’t had one in a very long time. What if he dumped her? She swallowed hard and then she heard Zach’s voice in her head. And what if he doesn’t?
“I’m going to go,” Jessie said. “No matter what happens, I’m going to go and have fun.”
“And order the most expensive thing on the menu,” Emma said. “Zach can afford it and if he does break things off with you, he can damn well pay for it.”
Jessie looked at her in surprise and said, “You have a dark side.”
“We all do,” Emma said. “Some of us just hide it better than others.”
She stepped back and checked Jessie over. She pushed in one of the hairpins that was coming loose and adjusted the belt that rode on Jessie’s hips.
“Go get ’em,” she said and she pushed Jessie out the door and into the living room where Zach was waiting.
When Jessie caught sight of her date across the room, she felt her heart do the crazy fluttery thing it always did when she caught sight of Zach. For a second, she debated turning and running upstairs to hide out in her room and avoid whatever was coming. But the braver part of her—okay, the starving part who wanted some dinner—made her keep moving forward toward whatever the night offered, even if it was heartbreak.
Chapter 24
Jessie spent the entire ride to Portland thinking about what she would say when Zach gave her the old heave-ho. In her mind, she pretended to agree completely, as if surprised he even needed to say anything. They were just neighbors, nothing more. Also, in her mind, she chased the lie down with a gin and tonic and a wave of her hand. Yes, that would work.
As soon as they stepped into the restaurant, she’d order a drink, all the better to wash down her bitter disappointment. A tiny little flutter inside of her, that thing with feathers, stubbornly clung to the idea that he would say the opposite, that he would declare this their beginning. Jessie tried to ignore it but it continued to sing, ignoring any common sense or reason.
They listened to music on the drive and they talked about safe subjects like the girls, how their day at work had gone, what the weatherman was forecasting for the next few days. It was pleasant but it didn’t help Jessie’s nerves at all. She desperately wanted to know what Zach was thinking about them but she was too nervous to ask, so she said nothing.
She caught him glancing at her repeatedly, as if trying to gauge her mood. She felt like a poker player keeping her cards in tight to her chest, not letting him see that she was feeling all the feels for him. She knew it was cowardly but she’d been hurt so badly before, and after last night, she was as vulnerable as a woman could be. This boy owned her and that terrified her.
The restaurant was on the water. Big windows offered them a breathtaking view of the ocean at night. The table was draped in a white cloth with a small candle in a cut crystal candleholder beside a narrow vase filled with brightly colored gerbera daisies. Classy and elegant but in an understated way.
The hostess showed them to a table and Zach held her chair out for her.
“In case I haven’t said it yet”—Zach leaned over as he pushed her chair in—“you look beautiful tonight.”
“Thank you,” she said. She could feel the heat of him at her back and she wanted to turn around and hug him but she didn’t.
Instead, she watched as he took the seat across from her, drinking in the sight of him as if she hadn’t seen him in weeks rather than a few hours. Candlelight suited Zach. It brightened his pale hair and enhanced his masculine features, making his handsome face appear even more rugged. Jessie felt her heart beat hard in her chest.
The hostess told them that their server would be right with them and she left them with their menus.
Jessie glanced at the words, seeing nothing. The entire menu could be in hieroglyphics for all she could tell. She had to get a handle on this situation. She decided that she would retreat into what she and Zach seemed to do best. She would tease him.
“So, apparently, there was a bet,” she said.
“A bet?”
“Between our friends, about us and when you’d deliver, if you know what I mean.”
“What?” he asked and then he laughed. “Ha! I should have known they’d do something like that.” He gave her a thoughtful glance. “You aren’t offended, are you?”
“Are you kidding?” she asked. “Emma won, so I’m making her split it with me since I feel like I facilitated her win.”
“You facilitated it?” he asked. “Correct me if I’m wrong but I think I’m the one who made the magic happen.”
He wagged his eyebrows and cast her the most delightfully wicked grin she had ever received. Jessie fanned herself with her menu. Was it suddenly hot in here?
Contrary to her own plan and Emma’s advice, Jessie did not order a gin and tonic, nor did she get the most expensive thing on the menu. She and Zach shared a bottle of wine, and while he had the steak, she had the baked fish.
The conversation was light and fun; they talked about their favorite movies and television shows, where they’d gone to school, what they had thought they were going to do with their lives as opposed to what they were actually doing.
Jessie hadn’t known that Zach had studied engineering. He had been on track to take a job with a company working on Boston’s infrastructure when the brewery began to take off. Sam was a chemist, which was how he became the brewmaster, and Brad was a business major. Of the three of them, Zach was the extrovert, so he’d had to cram in a quick master’s degree in marketing while they tried to get the brewery up on its feet.
Jessie narrowed her eyes at him and said, “So what you’re telling me is that you’re a fraud.”
He popped open his mouth in surprise and asked, “How do you figure that?”
“You present yourself as th
is handsome, charming, irresponsible man-child when you’re really just cultivating a carefree persona that hides the calculating businessman underneath.”
“Wait,” he said. He held up one hand in a stop gesture. “I deny nothing, but let’s go back to the handsome and charming part.” He fluttered his eyelashes as her.
Jessie laughed. Oh, he was a charmer for sure.
“What about you?” he asked. “What was your plan before life happened?”
“I was a business major like Brad,” she said. “But I didn’t really have a plan. At the time, I still had my inheritance, so working wasn’t really an issue. I thought I’d invest my money and live off the dividends.”
“Did your ex blow through all of your money?” he asked.
“Every dime,” she said. “Even the girls’ college funds.”
Zach’s face went dark. Jessie had heard the term “murderous expression” but she’d never really seen it until now. She didn’t want their dinner to become consumed by her tale of woe. She shook her head.
“But look at me now,” she said. “I manage Gavin’s animal clinic and he pays me very well. I have a house and my girls are safe, well cared for, and most importantly loved. I’m actually pretty proud of my life right now.”
“You should be,” he said. His brown eyes were fierce as they swept over her face. “I think you’re—”
“Zach? Zachary Caine, is that you?”
Jessie ripped her gaze away from Zach’s intense stare to look at the woman who was standing beside their table. She was strikingly pretty with light brown hair that was stylishly cut in soft waves that framed her delicate features and highlighted her arching eyebrows, upturned nose, and deep dimples. Her lips were parted, showing her slight overbite, and she bit her lower lip as she looked at Zach as if uncertain of his reaction to seeing her.
Dread filled Jessie’s middle. She didn’t know why but she sensed this woman was not one of Zach’s short-lived flings. No, she was somebody important. She glanced at Zach and noticed that he blinked at the woman as if he couldn’t believe she was here and then he looked a bit sickly. Uh-oh. These two had a history and whatever it was, it wasn’t good.
“Alexa,” he said. “Wow, what are you doing here?”
“Dinner date with my husband,” she said. She gestured behind her at one of the tables, but Jessie couldn’t tell which one held her husband. She looked at Jessie expectantly.
Jessie didn’t know what to say so she said nothing. She glanced at Zach, but he was staring at Alexa as if sifting through a million feelings and trying to sort through them. His pain and confusion was a palpable thing, and Jessie wished she could help him with it but it wasn’t her place.
Alexa turned away from Jessie and met Zach’s gaze, then she jerked her head in Jessie’s direction. It was the prodding he needed.
“Oh, sorry, got a little lost there,” he said. He reached for his wine and finished it off in a long swallow. “Alexa Bracken, this is Jessie Connelly, my . . . er . . . uh . . . neighbor . . . no, that’s not it . . . my . . . um . . .”
“Girlfriend?” Alexa supplied.
Jessie started to shake her head but Zach nodded and said, “Yeah, that.”
Jessie might have been okay with it if he didn’t look so uncomfortable at the term. She frowned at him and was about to say that they were just friends but Alexa cut her off by clapping her hands and hugging Zach. Jessie didn’t like that. Not one bit.
“Oh, Zach, finally,” Alexa gushed. “I am so happy for you.”
She turned around and took one of Jessie’s hands in both of hers and clasped it tight.
“This is just wonderful,” she said. “A girlfriend after all this time. I was beginning to think you’d never get over . . . well, never mind. This is just the greatest news ever. I am thrilled, absolutely thrilled.”
There was something wrong here. Zach was looking more and more irritated and Jessie had no doubt that the forever bachelor in him was resisting being called anyone’s boyfriend. This more than anything else clued Jessie in to what had been on deck for this evening. Zach had been charming her for an easy letdown. Well, now he didn’t have to bother.
She pushed down the hurt that was bubbling up inside of her and decided to take back control of the situation. Jessie didn’t like this Alexa person, and she didn’t like the woman going on and on about Jessie and Zach, as if their relationship or lack thereof was any of her business. She gently tugged her hand out of the woman’s grasp.
“I’m sorry,” she said, “but we’re not a couple. We’re just having a thing, a fun-filled fling, and that’s it.”
“Oh, sorry.” Alexa put her hand to her throat. “My mistake.”
“No, apparently, it was mine,” Zach said.
Chapter 25
His velvet brown gaze locked on Jessie. His mouth, which always seemed to be tipped in a mischievous grin, was set in a hard straight line. Jessie stared back. She was not going to feel bad for calling their relationship exactly what it was, especially when the word “girlfriend” seemed to make him physically sick. People were betting on her orgasms for Pete’s sake!
“Well,” Alexa said. Neither Zach nor Jessie turned to look at her but continued staring at each other as if they were entering in a contest of wills, although Jessie would be hard-pressed to explain about what. “I’ll leave you to your dinner then.”
Jessie saw Alexa leave out of the corner of her eye and said, “Nice to meet you.”
It was a lie. It wasn’t nice to meet her. The woman had ruined a lovely dinner and forced Zach into labeling their relationship something it wasn’t, which pushed Jessie into acknowledging what this whole dinner was really about.
After years of lies from her ex, she was scrupulous about telling the truth even to strangers. And the truth here was obvious. Zach had taken her out to reestablish their boundaries and reset them back to being neighbors. Fine. She was only sorry she hadn’t taken Emma’s advice and ordered the lobster.
“Good-bye, Alexa,” Zach said.
He didn’t turn to look at her when he said it and Jessie wondered about that. Then she realized there was a finality in his tone that indicated he was talking to her instead of Alexa. She felt her poor bruised heart lurch at the thought.
Their waitress reappeared and asked if they wanted dessert. It forced them to break eye contact and Jessie took the opportunity to escape to the ladies’ room.
“Nothing for me, thank you,” she said. She grabbed her handbag and left the table. “Excuse me.”
When she returned from the restroom, Zach was ready to go. He had her coat and he helped her into it, but there were no lingering touches, no kiss at the nape of her neck, nothing to signify that he felt about her any different than he did a friend or a sister.
The ride home was excruciating. Heat cranked out of the heater on the floor, but it felt as if the cold winter air was pressing hard on the glass windows, determined to get in. Jessie shivered into her coat.
As if aware of her every move, Zach reached for the heat knob on the console and turned it up, sending even more warmth into the cab of his truck. Jessie was about to thank him but the hard look on his face made her feel as if the words wouldn’t be welcome so she kept her silence.
When they arrived at her house, she didn’t wait for him. She just hopped down and made her way up the stairs and onto her porch. She had her key out but before she could unlock the door, Zach took the key from her hand and did it for her. First the storm door and then the interior one before he handed the keys back.
“Thank you,” she said.
“Sure,” he replied.
He wasn’t looking at her but staring at the porch floor as if studying the grain of the wood. Jessie wanted to say something that would bring back the old, smiling Zach but she didn’t know what to say. The woman at the restaurant, Alexa, had brought out a sid
e of Zach she’d never seen before, namely a deep unhappiness that made her want to hug him.
She resisted the urge, mostly because she had a feeling that hugs, or anything else, between them was at an end. It was bad on her if she was feeling sad or mournful. The Maine crew had warned her that Zach didn’t date, didn’t do commitments, and was more of a free-range sort of guy. If it bothered her, it was her own fault for not listening.
Of course, she could argue that having never had an orgasm before, she had agreed not to get attached to the orgasm maker before she really knew what she was agreeing to. If she’d known, she would have held on to him for a week, a month, okay, more like a year or two, until she got over this new discovery.
Zach had propped open the storm door with his shoulder, so she moved past him and pushed open the big wooden door that led into the house. Zach followed and together they found Brad sitting on the couch reading a book, wedged between Rufus, who had an alarming number of the girls’ mismatched hair bows in his pompadour, and Emma, both of whom were fast asleep.
Brad marked his place in the book with his finger and glanced at Zach and Jessie in surprise. “I didn’t figure you’d be here for another hour or two.”
“Yeah, well.” Zach shrugged and left it at that.
Brad frowned, glancing between them, but neither Jessie nor Zach elaborated. If there was a lower level of miserable and awkward, Jessie was certain she had never felt it.
Zach was unhappy with her. She got that. She supposed he felt embarrassed at her candor with his former whatever Alexa had been to him. But she was equally miffed with him for trying to pretend they were something that they weren’t. What last night had been lovely and beautiful and full of promise was now sordid and weird. Ugh.
“Rufus, let’s go,” Zach said. He glanced at Brad and Jessie. “Early morning tomorrow, so I’ll just—”
“Go,” Jessie finished for him.
He stared at her for a heartbeat. His brown gaze showed a flash of hurt and then it was gone. He forced a smile that for the first time Jessie could remember didn’t meet his eyes.
Every Dog Has His Day Page 22
