Mondays (The Wait Book 2)

by Harper Bentley

  He snorted as he used a fork to place a cinnamon roll on my plate then one on his. “Fuck, this is good,” he groaned after taking a bite.

  I basically did the same at my first bite and we sat in companionable silence—amidst our noisy food groaning that is—for several minutes.

  “How long have you lived here?” he asked.

  “Almost two years,” I said, licking glaze off my thumb before taking a drink of coffee.

  He finished his roll then reached for a cookie, splitting it in two and taking a bite, let out a low growl of pleasure. “These are amazing.” I nodded in agreement because they most definitely were. After taking a drink of coffee, he stated, “Bet I can read your mind.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yep. You’re thinking, ‘Is he gonna pay me back for eating all my shit?’” He smiled when I huffed out a laugh.

  I took the last bite of my cinnamon roll. “Totally what I was thinking,” I quipped before reaching for a cookie myself, glad that he was keeping the conversation light for now.

  “I never stopped loving you, Birdie.”

  So much for keeping it light.

  He gazed at me for a moment. “And stop thinking that I’m only telling you this because I’m getting a divorce and don’t want to be alone. That’s not it.”

  He’d always been able to read me so easily, but I was pretty sure my skeptical look had given me away.

  “I’ve thought a million times about calling you, but I knew if I heard your voice, it’d just make things harder, which is selfish, I know. So I thought if I just ignored it, it’d all go away. It didn’t.” His eyes were full of anguish as he spoke, and it was then I knew the full depth of his feelings; he’d been hurt by everything too. “I know it sounds contrived, but I was in so much fucking pain after I left you. I kept telling myself I was doing the right thing by staying with Sonya.” He ran his hands over his face. “You know things had been fucked up between Sonya and me for a while, even before I met you. But, and I hope you understand this, I had to stay with her.”

  I looked down into my coffee cup for a moment knowing I absolutely understood. I’d known all along. My anger toward him just hadn’t let me see it. I peered up at him and nodded. “It’s because you have integrity.” Relief shone on his face as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. “I get it, Beck. But I was just so…hurt. I felt betrayed. It was a lot to handle, losing you. Then losing Mason and…giving his heart to your wife.” Tears welled up in my eyes and before I could blink them away, I was in Beck’s lap.

  “I know and I’m so goddamned sorry.” He kissed my forehead. “And what you did for Sonya was…Jesus, words can’t even say how kind, how fucking generous it was of you to do that.” His arms tightened around me and he kissed the top of my head. “But I was in an impossible situation, Birdie. Even though I loved you, what kind of man would I be if I’d left her after she’d had surgery? I couldn’t have lived with myself.”

  I sniffed as tears streamed down my face, nodding again because he was right.

  “I made a vow to Sonya and I tried to honor it. Fuck, I tried.” He shook his head. “But knowing about the drugs and that she’d slept with other men, it was hard.” As he played with my fingers, I knew he was reliving those moments in his mind. He rested his chin on the top of my head and divulged, “You need to know I was prepared to be with her for the rest of my life.”

  “I know,” I murmured. What he was saying now had my brain on overload.

  “Even though I loved you.” I felt him blow out a breath against the top of my head. “I tried to stop. God knows I did.” We sat there for a while until he spoke again. “When I saw you at Fleishman, my heart fucking stopped. Everything I felt for you came welling up again.” He cleared his throat. “Of course, you were mad at me as you had every right to be.” His shrug made me pull back and look at him. “I just want you to know how sorry I am about everything.”

  He’d answered all my questions and I’d forgiven him, so there really wasn’t much else to say.

  “She’s been having an affair with the guy who did her EKG. She’s in love with him.”

  “What?”

  He shrugged again. “She deserves to be happy.”

  Wow. I rested my head against his chest to think more on that while he continued fiddling with my fingers. His wife was really just something else. God.

  “And the thing is, Birdie? I really didn’t know her. She hid a lot from me.” He pushed his chest out to get me to look up at him. “Then yesterday when I tried finding you, I realized I don’t know a lot about you either and I hate that.”

  I frowned. “I guess I don’t know a lot about you either.”

  He shook his head as he gazed down at me. “How can you be in love with someone when you don’t really know who they are?”

  “I have a theory,” I disclosed. At his questioning look, I went on. “I think we fall in love with how we feel when we’re with someone, but not with the actual person.” He narrowed his eyes, so I expounded my point. “I mean, we can love someone, of course. I just think the difference in loving or being in love is the way you feel.”

  He was quiet for a minute before he spoke. “That makes sense.” He reached for a cookie pulling it close to look at it. “Like, right now, this cookie makes me feel awesome. I think I’m in love with it.”

  I smacked his chest and chuckled. “You’re ridiculous.”

  He snorted then took a bite. “And you’re in love with me.” He chewed for a moment then his look turned serious. “You are in love with me, right?”

  “I didn’t think I wanted to be,” I admitted and bit my lip, hoping he’d understand.

  “We can take this slow, Birdie. We can just be friends first. If you want to try it…”

  “I’d like that.” God, yes, I’d like that because this had been a lot coming at me. “And you need to know,” I repeated his words, “that I was prepared to never see you again.” I looked up at him to make sure he understood the gravity of what I was saying. “I’d come to terms with the possibility that I wouldn’t, and I was okay with it.”

  “I get it.”

  “That’s why this has to be slow, Beck, because I’m still in that mindset.”

  His startling blue eyes looked into my green ones and he said, “Okay.” Then he gave me a sweet cookie peck of a kiss and helped me off his lap as we stood. “Now, how about you walk me home.”

  I snorted. “I got my four miles in today. I’m good.”

  He pulled my jacket off the chair and tossed it to me then put on his own. Grabbing my hand, he said, “Come on.”

  Outside, he grinned at me as we walked down my stoop then up the very next one. Then punching in the code, he unlocked the front door.

  “You live here?” I laughed.

  “As of today,” he confirmed, pulling me inside and up to the second floor where he took his keys from his pocket and unlocked his door admitting, “And I honestly had no idea you lived next door.”

  Jaden would have a field day about this being a sign, I thought, rolling my eyes. Then I looked around his apartment and exclaimed, “This is practically a mirror of mine!”

  “I wonder,” he mumbled, still holding my hand and leading me down the hallway. In the bedroom, he went to the window. “That yours?” He pointed at the window across from his.

  “Oh, my God! It is!” Seeing the leer he gave me, I beat him to the punch. “And I expect you to put on a strip show for me every night!”

  “You can count on it,” he cracked with a wink.

  I reminded myself that we were only going to be friends for now.

  For now.

  Chapter 16—Beck

  After walking Birdie back to her apartment, in the cab to my hotel, I called Sonya to tell her I’d be by the next day to pick up some stuff. She said she’d be sure to be gone when she heard I’d probably be bringing Paul. Ah, guilt. The wonderful creator of chickenshits.

  I next called Paul who was actu
ally off tomorrow, so I talked him into helping me move my things.

  “Look, Beckerhead, it was nice knowing you and all, but I draw the fucking line when it comes to moving shit.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, well, I remember helping you move last year.”

  “You drank beer while the moving guys brought everything up to the apartment!”

  “And it was great. I did help Taylor a couple times, though.”

  He huffed out a laugh. “You screwed in a hinge on a cabinet door.”

  “And sprained my wrist doing it. I should’ve sued.”

  “Jesus, you’re a pussy. What time?”

  We met at what was now Sonya’s apartment at eleven the next morning and moved the rest of my clothes, some books and other shit like toiletries and a couple boxes of knick knacks.

  It all fit into my Jeep and his Explorer which was kind of sad.

  “That it?” he asked.

  I raised my eyebrows sheepishly. “I think so.”

  “I like it. It’s like you knew one day it’d come to this,” he joked which really struck a chord.

  “Fuck. I think you’re right.”

  He clapped me on the back. “Nah. You loved her. You’re a good guy and she fucked it all away.” He looked up at the building. “Fuck her.”

  Normally, I would’ve come to Sonya’s defense but not anymore since what he said was pretty much true. I nodded then we got into our cars and left.

  I pressed the call button outside Birdie’s building that afternoon.

  “Yes?” she answered.

  “Delivery,” I responded.

  It took her a minute to realize it was me, I think, then she replied, “Sorry. Wrong apartment. Bye!”

  I stood there wondering if she was playing when I heard the door buzz so I knew she was. I opened it and went up to the second floor to see her giggling in her open door when I got there.

  “Funny,” I mumbled, holding up a bag. “Guess I’ll just take this chicken pho, brisket bahn mis, beer and go.”

  “No! I’m starving! Get in here!” she squealed, opening her door wider for me to go in. “It smells so good!”

  She got out plates—while I tried not staring at her ass in the yoga pants she wore—and was scarfing down her meal in no time

  “Damn. I should be recording this,” I said, mouth hanging open acting as if I were witnessing something spectacularly crazy as I watched her eat.

  She laughed. “Look, I worked all morning and only had a cookie.” She took a bite of her sandwich. “Good lord, this is good.”

  “You worked on Fleishman’s books?” All I saw on the dining table where we sat was a laptop.

  She nodded as she wiped her mouth with a napkin. “I can remotely access them with a program McNamara uses.”

  “What exactly is it you’re looking for?” I could tell she was conflicted, not sure whether she should spill the details. It wasn’t like I couldn’t ask Joel, but I let it go for now since it obviously made her uncomfortable.

  After taking a long pull from her beer bottle, she set it down, and suggested, “How about we get to know each other better instead of talking shop?”

  “Sounds like a good plan.”

  “Good! I’ll go first! Middle name?” she asked, picking up her sandwich to take another bite.

  “Hamilton.”

  “Really?”

  “I told you Beck was Mom’s maiden name. Hamilton is another family name.” I shrugged. “Now you, plus maiden name.”

  “Bernadette Elizabeth Winchester.”

  “I like it. What’s your dad’s restaurant’s name?”

  “Sub Atomic,” she said with a grin. “Dad was gonna be a chemical engineer but changed his mind and went into nutrition instead. Have you ever eaten there?” I shook my head. “I’ll have to take you sometime. His subs are the bomb.” I rolled my eyes at her cheesy joke making her laugh. “Okay, so you asked two questions, so I get two.” She narrowed her eyes for a moment. “What city did you grow up in and who was your childhood best friend?”

  “A small town called Porter just east of Pittsburgh,” I began when she interrupted.

  “Did you play any sports other than baseball?”

  I chuckled at her eagerness to get to know me. “Football and basketball.”

  “What was your mascot?”

  “We were the Panthers.”

  “The Porter Panthers. Cool. Best friend?” she remembered.

  “Josh Hutchinson.”

  “The guy from Hunger Games?” she spouted excitedly.

  I laughed. “I think that guy’s Hutcherson or something.” I let out a Psh sound. “You think I’d be wasting my time working at Fleishman if my best friend was an actor? Hell no. I’d be his manager and be hauling in the big bucks.”

  With a giggle, she said, “Okay, okay, smartass. Do you still talk to him?”

  “I’ll put it this way, I got in a lot of trouble hanging out with Josh. Last time I talked to him, it was right after we’d graduated high school and he’d been arrested for stealing a car. He was out on bail and had to wear one of those ankle monitor things for tracking.”

  “Wow. Probably a good thing you weren’t with him, huh?”

  “Yeah. Last I heard, he’s in prison now for burglary. We did have fun, though.” I shrugged at the judgmental look she gave me. “We were bored kids in a small town.”

  “Well, now he’ll be bored for the next five to ten,” she said matter-of-factly.

  God. Fucking cute. This just being friends thing was going to be tough.

  “You asked seven, so I get seven.” She scoffed and I held up my hand, putting a finger up with each example I gave. “Where’d you grow up, best friend, other sports, mascot, Hunger Games, do I still talk to him, probably good I wasn’t with him, huh? Seven.”

  “You should’ve been a lawyer with that memory.”

  I chuckled and focused on keeping my hands to myself because what I wanted to do at that moment was bend her over the table and fuck her brains out. Yeah, yeah, I know. I was a horny guy who hadn’t had sex in two years. Sue me.

  The rest of the afternoon was spent asking and answering all sorts of questions and getting to know each other better. I hadn’t even realized how late it’d gotten when she asked if I wanted to order something for dinner.

  “Nah, I should probably get back to my place and put some things away,” I said.

  “I can help if you want,” she offered.

  “Thanks, but I kinda wanna do this alone, you know, make it mine? But I’d love if you came for dinner maybe Wednesday? I’ve got furniture being delivered Tuesday, so I’ll actually have a table to eat at.”

  “I’d love that,” she said, walking me to her door. “Hey, maybe I could get your number? Just in case?”

  Ah. This was perfect. I’d thought of asking for hers but didn’t want to push. We put each other’s contact information into our phones then she walked me down to the building’s door.

  “Oh! Another thing? It might sound kind of dumb, but when you get back to your apartment, maybe you could, like, flash your bedroom light twice to let me know you made it okay?”

  “You want me to flash you?” I smirked and waggled my eyebrows. “And can we get walkie talkies and call each other on them after our parents go to sleep and plan to sneak out?” I teased.

  The look she gave me was too damned adorable and not being able to help myself, I pulled her in for a hot, wet, deep kiss. When I moved my head away, I think I was in just as much shock as she was, so I quickly told her goodnight and got the hell out of there before she could cuss me out.

  Once in my apartment, I decided some mollification was in order since I’d crossed a line. So doing her bidding, I went into my bedroom and flipped the light switch twice. She did it back but at a slower rate and I laughed that I could see her waving at me.

  And I was glad we were friends.

  For now.

  Chapter 17—Birdie

  Monday morning, I thought
maybe Beck would text and we could take a cab to work together. But he didn’t, so I stuck to my usual routine.

  When I got to Fleishman, he was already in his office sitting at his desk. His jacket was off and I saw that he wore suspenders. Holy cow. I normally thought they looked kind of dopey on guys, but Beck made them hot.

  “Hey,” I said when I stopped in his doorway.

  “Hey, honey,” he answered and I felt my stomach go all flip-floppy.

  “You wanna have lunch today?” I asked.

  His face went soft and I knew he liked the idea. “I can’t, sorry. I have to meet with my lawyer today.”

  I leaned into his office and whispered, “Oh. The divorce?”

  “Yeah,” he whispered right back leaning toward me with a grin. “The divorce.”

  I rolled my eyes and stood straight again. “I didn’t know if you’d told anyone yet and was trying to be discreet.”

  He shrugged. “I’m not wearing my wedding ring so I think they’ll figure it out soon enough. Especially when they see me making out with you in the board—” He stopped himself and scrunched up his face as if he’d made a terrible faux pas. “Sorry.” He started mumbling, “Friends, friends, friends,” as he looked around on his desk for something to occupy him.

  “You’re so bad,” I said with a chuckle and turned to go.

  “But Birdie?” he called. I spun back to him with raised eyebrows. “You come in here wearing those tight skirts that cup your heart-shaped ass so nicely then top it off with the fuck-me shoes and, well, don’t think I don’t wanna bend you over my desk and fuck you right this very moment.”

  Well, wow.

  I felt my face flush at the smoldering look he was giving me. Was it hot in here? I think it was hotter from when I’d gotten off the elevator to now.

  “Okay,” I breathed out not knowing what else to say.

  “Fuck,” he growled, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath then blowing it out as if he was running out of patience. When he opened his eyes, he ordered, “Get to work before I make good on what I just said.”