Party Animal (Roosters 6)

by Gale Stanley

He winced. “I didn’t mean --”

  “Casey hosts Easter dinner every year,” Paul broke in. “It’s our tradition.”

  “I’m impressed,” Lee said. “My idea of cooking is scrambled eggs and toast.”

  Finally, something about me impressed him. “You’re invited, Lee. If you don’t have other plans, that is.”

  “No. I’d love to come.”

  “Great.” I threw some money on the table. “Well, I think I’m ready to call it a night.” I slid out of the booth and looked at Lee. “Coming?”

  He gave me a blank stare.

  “You said you’d get me a cab. Remember.”

  “Oh, sure.” Lee pulled out his cell.

  “You’re not coming with me?”

  Lee’s face turned bright red. “I… uh, I think you misunderstood.”

  “Never mind. I’ll walk.”

  “Casey. Wait…”

  I kept walking and never looked back. Bastard. I thought he might run after me, but of course he didn’t. Well, that was that. I vowed I’d never make another move on him. The ball was in his court now, but it didn’t matter to me one way or another. There were plenty of other fish in the sea.

  Chapter Four

  My sister always spent spring break with me and I always made sure nothing would interfere with our week. No shoots were scheduled, and I wouldn’t be going to the club. To be honest, I wouldn’t miss the drinking and I’d see my friends Easter Sunday.

  I’m older, but my sister is an inspiration to me. She just finished her junior year at California State University, and I have no doubt she’ll reach all her goals -- a Masters, and then a Ph.D. in special education. She had her choice of colleges but she picked Cal State LA to be near me, and not because I supplement her grants. Julie and I have always been best friends and each other’s biggest cheerleader.

  Neither of us had an ideal childhood. My parents bombarded me with bullshit. They thought they could heal me with prayer. Things weren’t much better for Julie. She has cerebral palsy. The doctors said she didn’t get enough oxygen at birth. Instead of getting her the therapy she needed, my parents prayed over her. Fortunately, Julie was only mildly affected, no cognitive disabilities, but there were problems with movement, balance and coordination. Still, our parents wanted to keep her isolated. They thought Julie should live a quiet, reticent life. Julie disagreed. She believed she could do anything she set her mind to. Her dream was to help children with disabilities. When I left home, I promised I’d help her make her dream a reality.

  I parked in the lot and texted Julie. “I’m here. ((hug))”

  The doors opened and Julie limped down the ramp, cane in her left hand, and duffle bag in her right. I could see she was concentrating so she wouldn’t fall. I wanted to help her, but she always insisted on doing things herself. She spotted my SUV and came toward me. I can afford a sports car, but it’s easier for Julie to get in and out of this one.

  When she got close, I jumped out and took the duffle bag. She gave me a big bear hug. “I missed you, Alek.”

  Julie is the only person who calls me by my real name. When I was a kid, I read somewhere that if you discover someone’s real name you get power over them. Ever since, I’ve been careful who I divulge my name to. It’s just superstition, but Aleksander Vasko is my past. The world knows me as Casey Cox now, and that’s the way I want it. Julie’s given name is Julija, but she prefers Julie.

  I returned her hug twofold. I don’t see her nearly enough. She’s always studying and I’m always working. “I missed you, too.”

  I stowed Julie’s bag and helped her into the car. “Wanna stop for ice cream on the way home?”

  * * *

  Julie settled into her room and unpacked. Later, I ordered pizza for dinner. I poured us each a glass of red wine and we ate in the kitchen. We’re not typical siblings. We have a strong bond and we never argue. Julie knows what it was like growing up with our parents. She’s the only person who completely understands me. Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself.

  Julie took another slice of pepperoni and gave me a cheeky grin. “So what’s new?”

  I knew what she was really asking. Last week, I’d brought someone home. That’s my M.O. I feel more in control when I’m in my own space. The battery had run out in my cell and Julie called me on the landline. My hook-up buddy answered the phone and started chatting with her. That’s a no-no. I don’t want Julie exposed to my one-night stands. I was so pissed, my hard-on completely deflated and I threw him out. But it was too late. Julie had gotten the wrong idea. She assumed I had a boyfriend, and she started bugging me about it.

  I played dumb. “Same old, same old.”

  “Are you still seeing that guy?”

  “What guy?”

  “The one I spoke to on the phone last week.”

  “Oh, him. It didn’t work out.”

  “You’re too picky, Alek. Nobody is perfect.”

  How do I explain that I don’t know how to be in a romantic relationship, one where I don’t have to do or be anything besides myself? “I’m not looking for perfect. I’m not looking at all. Work takes up most of my time.”

  “I want more for you, Alek. You shouldn’t be alone.”

  Jesus, I always feel like Julie is the older sibling, she’s so wise. “You have enough on your plate, Julie. Don’t worry about me. I have my friends, and I have you. I don’t need anyone else.”

  Julie’s eyes glazed with a layer of tears. She blinked and one slid down her cheek. My heart sank watching her bite her lip to gain control.

  “I do worry,” Julie said. “For a long time I worried about everything, especially what people thought of me. I hated my body, the pain, my limp… I wanted to be normal. Sometimes I was even jealous of you. Why is Alek the beautiful one, and not me? Then I’d hate myself for thinking like that.”

  Julie had never told me this before. My heart twisted. “You’re a beautiful girl, sweetheart, inside and out.”

  She wiped her eyes and smiled at me. “I know that now, thanks to you. When you brought me here, everything changed. Suddenly, I wasn’t living with people who never let me forget I was different. My world expanded. I met people who treated me like an equal. Finally, I could accept myself.” She paused for a moment. “I met someone.”

  I’m sure my surprise showed on my face. “How long has this been going on?”

  “Just a few weeks. He’s smart and ambitious. And he sees me as an equal and a partner.” She blushed. “Alek, he makes me feel beautiful.”

  I actually felt a little jealous. “When do I get to meet this perfect man?”

  Julie shrugged. “I don’t know if this is happy ever after, but it’s happy for now, and that’s good enough.”

  “I don’t want you to get hurt, Julie.”

  “It’s okay. Maybe I’m an idiot, but I’m willing to risk it.”

  “You look happy.”

  “I am, and I want that for you.”

  “I’m happy if you’re happy. Now let’s finish up this pizza and watch a movie.”

  I didn’t catch much of the movie. All through it, I thought about what Julie had said, and her new boyfriend. She’d grown up too fast. I’d been taking care of her for a while and I wasn’t ready to give up being her protector.

  * * *

  When I left home, I started sending Julie money regularly. It wasn’t much at first, but it increased along with my fame. No one knew what I was doing until I went back to collect Julie and move her to LA. My parents couldn’t understand why I had so much money. They accused me of being a dope dealer and threatened to call the police. I finally blew up and told them the truth. I’ll never forget their horrified expressions. They thought porn was worse than selling dope. But Julie knew I was working to build a better life for us, and since she was eighteen, they couldn’t stop her from leaving with me.

  Julie accepts what I do, but I know she’d prefer me to have a regular job. She always tells me one day she’ll
make a lot of money and support me so I can retire. “I know you will,” I tell her. “We’ll always be there for each other.” Now I wasn’t so sure. What if she really fell for this guy? She didn’t seem anxious for us to meet. Did I embarrass her?

  I tried not to dwell on that. I didn’t want to spoil the holiday. The rest of the week I kept her busy. One day we rubbed shoulders with Hollywood celebrities at Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum. We clowned around and took dozens of photos. Another day we went shopping and I bought her a bunch of clothes she didn’t want. She worries that I spend too much money on her. Mostly we hung around the pool and talked. She told me a little more about her boyfriend and I tried not to act like an overbearing father.

  Julie and I enjoy cooking together and we planned the menu for Easter dinner, then went food shopping. The ham is ridiculously easy, and my friends always bring the wine and desserts, so we made lots of side dishes -- smoked salmon deviled eggs, a classic green bean casserole, fresh peas with mint, and candied sweet potatoes.

  On Easter Sunday, Julie wore one of her new dresses and I put on khakis and a shirt. She was beyond excited. Julie loved Joey and Paul.

  The buzzer went off promptly at three and I let them up. “Welcome to my humble abode.”

  Paul and Joey had their arms full of packages. Julie led them into the kitchen so they could deposit the goodies. I heard her sweet, joyful laughter echo through the apartment as I went to greet Lee. He was looking around, probably wondering why I didn’t live in an expensive high rise in a fancier neighborhood. I had my reasons. I wanted to be close to Julie, and besides, she loved this building.

  “Happy Easter.”

  He handed me a bottle of Prosecco. “Thanks. Happy Easter to you.”

  I noticed Lee had a box in his other hand, but he held onto it. Just then, Paul and Joey entered the living room with Julie. They were still laughing and Julie’s face was flushed.

  “Casey,” Joey said. “Julie gets prettier every time I see her. If I weren’t gay, I’d make a pass at her. Maybe I will anyway.” He grabbed her from behind and whirled her around.

  “You’re too late. She has a boyfriend.”

  Joey released her. “I’m heartbroken.”

  Julie kissed him. “We’ll always be bff’s.” She walked over to Lee. “You must be Lee. Alek told me all about you.”

  Lee looked over at me. “Did he?”

  “Well, no. Just that you were coming for dinner.”

  Lee grinned. “He didn’t tell me anything about you.”

  “I’m not surprised. Alek keeps things inside.”

  Lee’s expression had changed the tiniest bit when he heard my given name, but he didn’t mention it. “Luckily, Paul is more talkative. This is for you, Julie.” He handed her the box.

  “Thank you.” She looked surprised as she sat on the couch to open it. When she lifted the lid, her face lit up. “It’s a pysanka!” She squealed. “Thank you, Lee.” She stood up too quickly and almost fell, but Lee caught her and she gave him a bear hug.

  The intricately decorated eggs are a Ukrainian Easter tradition, a symbolic gift of life. I hadn’t seen one in years. This one had red poppies, the national flower of Ukraine, on a mosaic background.

  Julie couldn’t stop staring at it. “Alek, come look.”

  Evidently, Paul had done a lot of blabbing. I spoke up grudgingly. “It’s very nice.”

  “It’s beautiful, Lee. My parents had a collection of them in the house, but none as pretty as this one.”

  “I’m glad you like it, Julie. I’ll get you another one next year. You can start a collection.”

  I was feeling jealous -- again. I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. “You don’t even know if you’ll be here next year.”

  “It doesn’t matter,” Lee said. “If I’m not, I’ll send it.”

  “But, we hope you’ll be here, don’t we, Alek?”

  “Of course.” Score one for Lee. I wondered if he was trying to make amends for rejecting me. It didn’t matter. He was off my radar.

  “Is anybody else hungry?” Joey said. “It smells great in here and I’m famished.”

  Julie took Lee’s arm and led him toward the kitchen. “Everything is ready. Let’s eat.”

  Dinner went well and we lingered over dessert, the guys telling Julie stories to make her laugh. They treated her just like any sassy young woman and she loved it. We all cleaned up together and any tension between Lee and me evaporated. It was a good night.

  Julie and I walked the men to the door. There were kisses and hugs all around. Then Lee approached me and leaned in. “Thank you,” he whispered. His lips pressed against mine. I was completely unprepared. His lips felt soft and warm and tasted of wine. The kiss wasn’t brief and perfunctory. It set off sparks and I didn’t want it to end. When we broke apart, I saw a flash of desire in his eyes and it made my heart flutter. Before I could say anything, he was gone.

  I felt off balance. When I turned around, I saw Julie watching me with a funny expression. I thought she was going to say something, but just then her cell went off and she fled to her room.

  Later, I knocked on Julie’s door to say goodnight. She was sitting on the bed looking at the egg.

  “I like him, Alek.”

  “Are we talking about Mr. Perfect?”

  “Don’t play dumb. I’m talking about Lee.”

  “Oh. I’m sure he likes you, too.”

  “Why don’t you like him?”

  “You got it wrong, Julie. He doesn’t like me.”

  She shook her head. “No, you’re wrong.”

  I sat next to her. “Is it because he gave you a present? You think he did it to impress me?”

  “Not at all. The present was genuine. I can smell bullshit a mile away. No, I was watching him watch you. That wasn’t hate I saw in his eyes.”

  “You’re right, Julie. It was lust. He wants my body.”

  She looked at me sadly. “Oh, Alek, how are you going to find love if you don’t trust anyone?”

  “I’m not looking for love. I love you, sweetheart.” I kissed her goodnight and went to my room, but I didn’t fall asleep for hours.

  Chapter Five

  After the holiday, I took Julie back to school so she could start her summer session. The apartment felt empty without her and I felt bored and restless, and confused. I couldn’t get Lee off my mind. His mixed signals were driving me crazy. After all the time we’d spent together, I still couldn’t figure him out. Did that kiss mean he was ready to make a move on me, or was I imagining things? I called Joey and asked him to meet me at Tidbits. “And don’t forget to invite Paul and Lee.”

  It took me forever to decide what to wear but I still got to the club early. I sat at our favorite table, ordered a drink, and flirted with the guys who stopped by to say hello. It passed the time until Paul and Joey showed up. I waved them over.

  “Thanks for Easter,” Joey said. “I enjoyed seeing Julie. She’s a great girl.”

  “And super smart,” I added. “Her grades are phenomenal.”

  “It’s phenomenal what you’ve done for her,” Paul added.

  I brushed off the compliment. “She deserves it. Here comes a waiter. What should we order for Lee?”

  Paul looked troubled. “Don’t bother. He’s not coming.”

  My heart dropped. “Why?”

  “He went back east.”

  I took a drink, but couldn’t swallow over the lump in my throat. “For good?”

  Paul shrugged. “I hope not.”

  “What’s going on?”

  “His ex called and he couldn’t say no.”

  Lee had never had a problem saying no to me. If he’d run back to his boyfriend, it was because he wanted to be with him. Suddenly, I wasn’t interested in sticking around. I was ready to grab the first hot guy that caught my attention and take him home.

  “Don’t wait for me,” I told the guys. “I see somebody I know at the bar.”

  I came up behind Beau and put m
y arms around him. “Hey, pretty boy, you just got lucky. Let’s get out of here.”

  He turned around and kissed me. I led him outside and we walked the two blocks to my apartment. We barely made it out of the elevator before I was undressing him. He was groaning so loudly I thought he’d wake the neighbors. I unlocked the door and slammed it behind us. I let him push me against the door and kiss me.

  It was a sloppy kiss. I don’t know what I’d expected, but it didn’t make my pulse quicken. Oh well, kissing is highly overrated anyway. Beau pressed his tongue to the seam of my lips and I let him in. He explored my mouth and I felt nothing. Finally, he came up for air and I fought the urge to wipe his kisses from my mouth.

  Panting, Beau pulled me toward the bedroom. We undressed quickly, but I was in no rush. I looked at Beau’s familiar face and realized I didn’t know anything about him. He was like a stranger to me.

  Beau tried to capture my lips again, but I evaded his kiss. Instead, I pushed on his shoulders until he sank to his knees in front of me. “Show me what a good cocksucker you are.”

  “My pleasure,” he said. Beau bent his head and licked the tip of my cock for a taste of precum.

  Suddenly, I was in a hurry to get this over with. “Suck me. Take all of it.” I gripped his head and guided him forward. My cock hit the back of his throat. He gagged, but started sucking. I held him fast, controlling his movements. Beau sucked like a Hoover, always eager to please, but I felt detached, as if I was watching someone else get a blowjob. Beau kept going but it was taking way too long, like I was putting in overtime at work and holding off my climax. Only I wasn’t. I could see he was getting tired. Finally, I felt my balls tighten and my cock swell. A few seconds later, I shot my load.

  It was disappointing as hell. Sex had always been my escape from reality. It made me feel powerful and in control. I never thought I’d find it boring, but tonight the quick fix didn’t work.

  Beau was still on his knees. I looked down at him and wondered why I’d been so desperate to bring him home with me. Obviously, he wasn’t what I’d needed. I felt guilty because he hadn’t gotten off, but I couldn’t even playact my way through a blowjob, let alone fuck him. I pulled him up to his feet. “Sorry, Beau. Time to leave.”