Savannah said my reaction and nightmares could be a part of the PTSD I'd gained from my near-death experience, and the guys wouldn't let me apologize for it.
It wasn't my fault I was having dreams of falling from the same tower, but I felt guilty for troubling the guys. With school starting next week I wanted to get things under control, but I didn't know how.
Even in a world with magic, some things couldn’t be cured by a simple spell or even medication. I was relieved that my medication was working to control my seizures. I hadn't had one since my admission to the private medical ward of Brighten, but I wasn't going to take any other chances by stopping my medication either.
I sighed quietly, knowing there would be no way I'd sleep at this point. I unhooked my arms from around Logan and opened my eyes.
The room was still dark which told me we had a few more hours before sunrise. I rolled over, hoping the switch to laying on my side might prompt me to go back to sleep. I smiled at Kage's peaceful expression. I had not even realized I was sleeping in the same bed as him.
I assumed that if Logan was sleeping on one side, that my strawberry smelling Nixon would be on the other. Even with them being completely opposite, they were the perfect sandwich in bed, though I wondered if that was the same with more intimate scenarios.
Alice had been sleeping in Kage's room with Koa, both of them having their own little spot to rest in since my recovery. I had encouraged Alice to sleep in Kage's room instead of mine, knowing she'd probably be anxious all night long, waiting for me to wake up from an expected nightmare.
Once that happened, I knew she would stay up for the rest of the night, and that just wasn't fair to my familiar. She deserved some sleep just like the guys, but my stubborn familiar at least listened to me when I explained my reasons.
The guys just dismissed my concerns for their lack of sleep, saying it was their duty to ensure I was safe and comforted. I was grateful for their kindness and the love shown to me in the last month, even when I was unconscious.
Mother had explained to me how the guys had alternated watching and taking care of me, which was a big relief for my mom who'd been so worried about me. She'd returned home after I reassured her I'd get some rest and take my meds in a timely manner.
I did miss her and wished I could go home even for a little bit to try and get away from here. I loved this school, but with everything that had happened, I really could use a break from it all. Especially knowing once school started, we'd be stuck here for another four months.
I rubbed my thumb lightly against Kage's cheek. He'd been super quiet lately, and I could tell that he wasn't in a good mood. He did do his best to present himself like everything was fine, but I knew better.
We hadn't gotten a lot of time to spend with one another last semester, and I hoped we'd have a few moments alone so that I could find out what was troubling him. With my absent memories, I could barely recall the tower incident or the reason for me going there.
Even with the guy's explanations, I couldn't remember, and Savannah urged me not to force myself to try. All it led to was me getting a headache, and we wanted to avoid that in case it would trigger a seizure.
Kage stirred and a dreamy smile formed on his lips, but I knew he was still in a deep sleep. I pulled my hand back and sighed again, really wishing I could fall back to sleep.
Arms wrapped around my waist as a warm chest pressed against my back. "Jewel," Logan groaned, his husky voice made me shiver.
"Hmm?" I asked, wondering if Logan was sleep talking. I knew I sleep talked once in a while, mainly when I was deep in sleep, but Logan usually didn't.
"Can't sleep?" he asked.
"Not really," I whispered. I didn’t want to discuss the reason I couldn't sleep.
I turned in his hold so that I could look into his gold eyes. The need for reassurance filled me, and I knew Logan would be able to give it to me with those lovely eyes and his gentle touch.
Logan met my gaze with a small smile and slowly leaned down and pressed his lips against mine.
"Want to go have some hot chocolate?" he asked.
"Ya. I think that would help." Even though I was enjoying the warmth of his body and Kage's soft breathing, I thought a nice cup of cocoa might help me to sleep.
We slipped out of bed and my eyes caught on Nixon's red locks popping out of the blanket on the top bunk. Braxton was on the bottom, and it took me a few seconds to notice Maximus was pressed against the corner; Braxton took up a good portion of the bed.
I grinned at the sight, wondering when they started sleeping in the same bed. I hadn't noticed before as everyone was usually awake before me, with the exception of Nixon, who'd rather sleep all day than get up.
I glanced back to Logan who sported only a pair of black boxers. I wore a loose black shirt which I could tell from the mixed sent of Irish soap and specific cologne that it belonged to Braxton. I couldn't recall why I'd changed out of my black boy shorts and red crop top, but it must have been a good reason for Braxton to change my outfit.
Logan walked over to my side and slipped his hand in mine before leading the way out of the room and heading downstairs. As we passed Kage's room, I saw Alice and Koa sitting on the window sill, both of them fast asleep.
I couldn't see if Zane was asleep or even in the room from my quick observation, but I wondered why he wasn't in the room with everyone else.
We reached the kitchen, and Logan let me relax while he made two cups of premium hot chocolate. Once they were both prepared, we moved to the living room and sat on the couch.
"How are you feeling today, Jewel?" Logan asked as he took a sip of the hot liquid. I stared at the steam that rose from the pink mug, wondering how to answer that question without worrying him.
"Alright?" I suggested, realizing my somewhat questioned statement failed at not making him worry as he gave me a look.
"I...can we...maybe all of us..." I trailed off, unsure how to ask if all of us can take a trip away from Brighten. I so desperately needed to get away, but I felt that was asking too much from them.
"Let's go on vacation."
I blinked at Logan's words, lifting my once pleading eyes to meet his serious gaze. "What?"
"Let's go somewhere. Anywhere. Just somewhere far from Brighten for a week. We can leave today and come back Sunday night."
"All of us?"
"All of us. We talked about it a few hours ago."
"Did I have another nightmare?" I asked.
Logan stared into my eyes for a long time before he sighed. "Ya."
"Sorry."
"Nothing to apologize about, Jewel," Logan whispered.
My eyebrows furrowed as I stared at my drink, lost in thought. "I just...I really need a moment away from the school. I've been trying to remember what I dream about, and I can't. It's all fragments and makes no sense to me. I just want to be somewhere else for a few days and not have to worry about people looking up to me now that I'm an automatic Mage Warrior."
Logan nodded, allowing a few minutes to pass as we drank our hot chocolate in comfortable silence. He was probably concerned about my mental health at this point, and I honestly didn't blame him.
I was worried about how I was going to manage acting normal again for school, especially with more watchful eyes and more challenges from students who weren't as excited about my guaranteed spot as a Mage Warrior.
"Do you want to go back home?" he asked.
"Yes and no," I replied. "Yes because it's comforting, but no because I don't want to bother my Mother or yours if she decides to come over. Plus, it's rather crowded for all of us, and I like having long baths and don't want all of you competing on who gets to pee first."
Logan grinned, knowing exactly how the last time the guys stayed at my place went down. Washroom could be a damn Olympic sport, especially with three brothers who all seemed to need to pee at the same time. ALL the time.
The thought of it reminded me of Zane, and I looked up at Logan. "What
about Zane?"
"You don't want him to come?" Logan asked.
"No, I do. I mean like, there's been some tension hasn't there? You know, because of the memory loss thing."
"Zane and Kage are in a bit of a rough patch right now. The others seem more forgiving, but I guess the tension between the brothers is adding its own effects. I feel it'll resolve itself soon, but that's between them. If they can't figure things out, I'll get involved."
I stared at him for a long time, and he raised an eyebrow at me. "What?"
"I'm really happy you're mine. No matter what happens in my life, you support me and try to keep things together. I could practically feel like I'm drowning in whatever situation I'm in and there you would be, fixing everything around me so that I float and then swim against the current of challenges," I whispered.
I finished my hot chocolate and placed it on the coffee table before I met his gold eyes. "Even when I proposed the idea of being a guy for the sake of pleasing my mom, you supported me, and when I said I was interested in trying out this whole polyamorous relationship with the others, you agreed. I just...words really can't express how thankful I am to have you in my life. You're literally like a prince who is always able to save me from my insecurities and struggles."
Logan gave me a sweet smile as he reached out to place his half-filled cup on the coffee table. He then stroked my head with his right hand before he leaned in to give me a tender kiss.
I closed my eyes, realizing how long it had been since we'd kissed more than once a day. The guys had all been cautious, especially after Savannah's apparent long talk about what can trigger my seizures and her emphasis on how important it was for them to remember the information that she gave them.
I'd been dozing in and out, but I could clearly remember something about kissing and sex, and I knew whatever Savannah said made me frown, even in my half-asleep state.
I kissed him back, the slow sensual movement of our lips growing deeper with each passing second. I truly wished my words made him understand how amazing of a man, best friend, and lover he's been.
I trusted him with my life, and I just wanted him to know that. To understand how rare he was compared to many men, and even women, out there who wouldn't do half the things he'd do for me.
Not everyone would be willing to share their lover with five other individuals or work towards patching things up when everything got chaotic. To have someone like Logan was a blessing, and he needed to understand that. He needs to know how happy I am to have him in my life.
He moaned, slipping his tongue into my mouth while his hand ran through my long brown locks. When we finally broke apart, we were panting loudly, our eyes both hooded with lust for one another.
"I think sex is banned at the moment." Logan frowned.
"Who said that?"
"Savannah."
"I knew she said something that made me sad in my sleep!" I grumbled, and Logan chuckled, pressing his forehead against mine.
"If I go nice and slow, maybe that's allowed?" He cupped my face in his hand.
"You're not the type to go against the nurse's orders," I whispered, my eyes lowering to his lips as he teasingly licked his bottom one. I silenced him with my mouth, needing to enjoy his taste yet again.
He broke the kiss to give me a peck on the nose and grinned. "Sex is an exception. I've missed touching you."
I bit my lip, as I tried to ponder where we'd have slow sex. "And where are we going to have pleasurable slow sex that won't cause a seizure or wake up the house?" I asked.
"Right here." Logan grinned seductively, and I had to remind myself to breathe. I adored this sexy side of him and the dominance in his voice. He stood, and I took every advantage I could take to speed the process by lifting my shirt over my head, leaving my body almost naked.
My nipples were hard, and my pussy throbbed with anticipation. I lifted my hips to remove my laced underwear while I watched Logan slip his boxers down, revealing his cock that looked more than ready to slide right into me.
I laid down on the soft material of our couch and Logan hovered over me, positioning himself at my entrance. His eyes lingered above my head for a long moment, before he reached out to grab something at the edge of the couch.
"Lift your head, my Precious." He commanded. I did as he asked and when I lowered my head, felt the soft material of a pillow.
"Really?" I asked, my heart soaring with happiness over the simple gesture. Logan grinned widely, and his eyes darkened even more.
"Just because we're going slow, doesn't mean I'm not going to make sure I'm as deep as I can be. You'll thank me later." He winked.
He didn't give me a chance to reply, sliding himself inside me with ease. I moaned, arching my back at the sleek movement and the wonderful fullness of his cock.
His lips claimed mine, and I placed my hands on his shoulders, lifting my right one to slide into his silky locks.
"You sure you can keep this slow and quiet?" I teased through kisses, neither of us moving, and I was trying my best to keep my excitement level contained.
Logan bit my lower lip, tugging it gently before he gave me a sexy grin. "Can't be loud if I'm kissing you. As for slow, we'll just have to wait and see."
I gave up on asking more questions, my body ready to enjoy the pleasure I knew Logan would deliver at an agonizingly slow pace.
In the end, it was totally worth it.
"I wonder what it's like to masturbate as a guy," I mumbled as I relieved myself, making sure my cock was aimed properly so that the stream went right into the toilet and not everywhere. I'm a pro cock aimer.
I sighed when I finished and stared down at my length, wondering if I could give myself a hand job. It shouldn't be that hard, right? It's the same thing as how I please Logan. Just me pleasing myself. Hmm. I feel this could go horribly wrong.
Right at that thought the door of the washroom opened, and my mom poked her head in. "Jewel! Oh, you're still in your boy form?" Mother exclaimed, and I gawked at her as she lowered her gaze to my visible cock.
"Wow. Magic does wonderful things. Imagine when you're all hor-"
"MOM! I'm peeing!" I pointed out.
"Oh, right. I'm going out with Antoinette to see the Park family. Just wanted to let you know before you head to the cottage with your boyfriends. It's five o'clock now so make sure you're all prettied up and packed in an hour. Alice is helping find clothes for you!" Mother hummed in delight, looking beyond happy that I was going to the cottage for the remainder of the week.
"Thanks, Mom." I sighed as I tried not to think about how embarrassing her intrusion was.
"You’re welcome, sweetheart. Have fun. I told Alice to buy you condoms earlier. Well if you're a guy, I doubt you need condoms. Hmm, I should search on goo-"
"Mom! Need. To. Pee!" I huffed.
"Right! Anyways, have fun and safe sex. Love you!" She winked and closed the door. I waited till her footsteps faded and the washroom was completely silent before I groaned. I can't believe this.
The door opened once more, and I lifted my head to see Alice's wide grin as her shoulders trembled.
"Nice length there...BAHAHAHA!" She completely lost it, falling to the floor in a frenzy of laughter.
"UGH! How do men live with females?!" I snapped. I got a glimpse of Alice rolling around with her arms clenched around her waist before I shut the door, ensuring it was locked.
Alice's roaring laughter continued to be background noise, and I let out an angry huff. "So much for testing hand jobs out," I grumbled to myself, reaching for the toilet roll to wipe myself.
I finished my business and washed my hands. Taking a final glance at the mirror, I opened the door and came face to face with Alice, a stupid grin gracing her face as little giggles escaped her.
"Are you finished?" I asked.
"Just about," Alice replied, and I shook my head.
"I love how my embarrassing moments make your day."
"Make my day? Your embarrassing m
oments make me glad I'm alive. I wish I caught that on camera. Koa said he's gonna get me a phone!"
"What happened to your phone?" I asked.
"Uh....it um, exploded?" she replied with a sheepish grin.
"Meaning you probably tried carrying it in your owl form, dropped it, and it fell to the ground with such force, it broke on impact." Alice wasn't good with electronics.
"Everything you said, but after it broke, it exploded," Alice confirmed.
"I wonder if they make familiar-proof phones." I sighed, walking down the hall to my room.
"Does that mean you’re gonna buy me a new one?" Alice asked. Her fast footsteps told me she was following me to my room to pester me.
"Nope. Let your boyfriend get it for you," I retorted. Reaching my bed, I noticed the multiple sets of clothes neatly folded upon it—half the bed being girl clothes and the other half boy clothes.
"He's not my boyfriend, and please?! Jinn, you love me!" Alice whined. She wrapped her arms around my neck and whimpered over and over again.
"Pretty please? Mom won't get me one either. It's either you or Koa, but I don't want to bother him. PLEASEEEEEEE."
"You know I spoil you? And why is Mom going to the Park's? Like Braxton, Kade, and um...Zane's parent's house?" I asked, looking back at the clothes on the bed. "And thank you for setting my clothes up. I appreciate it."
"You’re welcome my lovely Mistress slash Master who adores me and will buy me a new phone!" Alice hummed happily, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before she unraveled herself from me and moved to sit on the edge of my bed that didn't have clothes on it.
"As for Mom, who knows?" Alice shrugged, but I felt she knew something.
"Are you sure?" I raised an eyebrow and narrowed my eyes.
"Yup. Mom said she wants to get to know all the other families who are dating you so she can plan some huge epic wedding! The Parks cover Braxton, Kage, Zane, and Maximus if I remember correctly, so that's four down with Logan making five."
Reflections of Me Page 3
