Bucket List To Love

by C. P. Santi

  A wide grin suddenly split his face. “Nan de, are you jealous of her?”

  “No! Why should I be jealous?”

  “You only started drinking heavily after I came back . . . you were jealous, weren’t you?”

  “No way!” Aya shook her head. She groaned when the room began to spin.

  “Really? Not even a little?” Fishing his phone from his pocket, he scrolled through some pictures. “Is this the girl you were jealous of?”

  It was her all right. Her hair was much shorter and she was dressed casually, but she was still very pretty. Girlfriend for sure. “That’s her.”

  “Pretty, isn’t she?” Ryo sat down beside her on the bed. He scrolled to another picture. This time, the girl had her arms wrapped around him.

  “I am not jealous.” She crossed her arms and looked away.

  “Really?”

  “Stop laughing!”

  “You are. You are so jealous!” He ducked as she raised a pillow to hit him with. “Ne, do you want to know her name?”

  “Why would I want to know her name?”

  “Her name is Naomi. Naomi Mori.”

  Aya felt the blood drain from her face as turned to face Ryo. “You . . . you married her?”

  Ryo couldn’t answer. He was laughing so hard.

  Aya balled up her fists in anger. “How dare you! You kissed me! You’re a married man!”

  Still laughing, he caught her fists in his hands. “Baka. She’s not my wife. She’s my sister.”

  “Your . . . oh.” Aya’s eyes went wide when she realized her mistake.

  “Sou. Now how about you explain why you were jealous.”

  “I wasn’t!”

  “Sure you were.”

  “I. Was. Not. Jealous!”

  “Hai, hai. Sure you weren’t.” Though he agreed, his grin looked smug.

  Aya closed her eyes in frustration. Ryo was right—she had been jealous.

  She was such an idiot. Because despite telling herself hundreds of times that Ryo wasn’t for her, deep inside she had hoped.

  Suddenly, as if a light bulb lit up in her head, she had an epiphany. Ryo was here—in her room, in her bed.

  She wanted him. She hoped he wanted her too.

  They were alone. And she was suddenly feeling very naughty.

  Slowly, she opened her eyes and looked at him. She had the satisfaction of seeing his smug little grin slip off his face.

  He stared at her mouth and gulped. “Aya?”

  She might not have had much practice at this, but she guessed there were times when a woman somehow knew exactly what to do. She smiled the smile. And this time, she had the satisfaction of seeing Ryo gulp nervously as he stared at her lips.

  She worked her hands free from his loose grip and put them on his chest. She could feel his heartbeat accelerate as she slowly moved her palms up until her arms were looped around his neck.

  “Aya . . . what are you doing?”

  The wariness in his tone made her smile. “What do you think I’m doing? I’m seducing you.”

  Then she kissed him. And thank god, he kissed her back.

  They fell back on the bed, and his arms moved to wrap around her as she landed on top of him. They both groaned at the impact.

  He feels so good.

  He was hard where she was soft and Aya couldn’t resist moving, loving the friction between their bodies. Why had she resisted this long? The reasons didn’t seem as important in the dark, where all that existed were kisses and hands and breathy sighs. When she started trailing kisses down to his shoulder, his hips shot off the bed.

  She smiled to herself. This was so happening.

  “Chotto . . . Aya.”

  “Mmm?”

  “We . . . we have to stop.”

  “We . . . what?” Okay, that was unexpected. She raised herself up and tried to discern if he was serious. The movement brought their lower bodies into contact and they both groaned. He wanted her too. That much was obvious. Her voice reflected her bewilderment as she asked, “But why?”

  “You’re drunk, Aya.”

  “I’m not.”

  “Yes, you are.” He brushed a lock of hair off her face. “I won’t take advantage of you like this.”

  She pouted. “But I want you.”

  “I know.”

  Did he just Han Solo me? Eyes narrowed, she rubbed against his harness and was gratified when he groaned in response. “You want me too.”

  “I do.” His hands moved to either side of her waist. He squeezed briefly before he lifted and eased her off him. “But we can’t, Aya. Not tonight, not like this.”

  “But, Ryo . . .”

  He shook his head and drew in a steadying breath. “You’re drunk, Aya. You aren’t thinking clearly. You have to go to sleep. Alone.”

  Aya wasn’t thick, but it took her more than a few seconds to process his statement. Eyes narrowed, she pushed him away. “Fine.” Then she turned to face the wall.

  Beside her, she felt him sit up. “Oyasumi, Aya-chan.”

  She didn’t bother answering.

  Chapter 14

  Aya winced at the bright sunlight filtering into her room. Damn, she had forgotten to draw the curtains fully shut. Judging by the intensity of the light, it was probably near midday.

  Shading her eyes with her hand, she glanced down. Ryo was gone. The futon he had slept on was neatly folded at the foot of the bed.

  She winced as she thought of how she had come on to him last night. Ugh. Talk about embarrassing. No wonder he had skipped out on her so early in the morning.

  Standing up to stretch, she happened to glance at her reflection in the mirror. No wonder Ryo had said no. She had forgotten to take off her makeup last night—hence the raccoon eyes and weird bed hair.

  She grabbed a towel and headed toward the bathroom. A shower would make her feel human again.

  As she stood under the hot spray and washed her hair, she thought about the past night.

  She had been drunk.

  It was a lousy excuse, but she couldn’t blame anything else. Mentioning that she hadn’t had sex in eons would just be pathetic. Yes, she’d just chalk it up to alcohol.

  Yeah right. She leaned her forehead against the wall and groaned. Though she’d been buzzed last night, she had been aware of what she was doing. She had wanted to seduce Ryo. She had wanted him so much it hurt.

  Oh god, how was she ever going to face him again? She had practically thrown herself at him. Good thing he had the sense to turn her down or she’d probably hate herself more this morning.

  One problem at a time, Aya.

  She wouldn’t have to see him until tomorrow anyway. She should be able to think of a good apology by then.

  She rubbed her hair with her towel and looked around. Where’s my hair dryer? Snapping her fingers, she remembered she had left it on her desk last night. Wrapping the towel around herself, she opened the bathroom door.

  Her jaw dropped at the sight of Ryo leaning against her desk, munching on a danish. Two mugs of coffee were on the table beside him. A paper bag from the French bakery downstairs lay open and a buttery smell filled the room.

  “Ohayo.” The once-over he gave her was not discreet at all. He grinned and gestured toward the table. “I got us breakfast.”

  “H-how?”

  He shrugged and gestured to her key card on the table. “C’mon, coffee’s hot. You’re dripping all over the floor.”

  Suddenly hyper-aware of her state of undress, Aya clutched the towel tighter around her. “I . . . uh . . . about last night.”

  “What about it?” Ryo rummaged in the paper sack for another pastry.

  “I . . . I’d like to apologize.” She noticed that he’d froze, his hand in the sack. Evading his gaze, she hurried on. “It was wrong of me to . . . to take advantage of you like that. I was drunk . . . and . . .”

  “What exactly are you apologizing for, Aya-chan?”

  Aya gulped. He was now standing right in front
of her. “For kissing you. For forcing myself on you like that—”

  Her words were cut off when he pushed her against the wall and kissed her. Thoroughly. When the kiss ended, they were both gasping for breath.

  “There. We’re even. You don’t have to apologize anymore.” His voice was a whisper against her ear. He gently bit into the tender flesh and she moaned. “Not unless . . .”

  “Unless?”

  He cupped her face and their gazes held. “Unless you’d like to do something that’s worth apologizing for?” He pressed into her. God, he was hard. His smile was so naughty it almost fried her brain circuits. “What do you say, Aya-chan?”

  Aya felt like she was at the edge of a precipice, ready to free-fall into nothingness.

  She felt a tinge of fear—as if some part of her recognized the enormity of what they were about to do. It wouldn’t be wise to get involved with him, Aya thought. He was leaving soon after all.

  But despite her apprehension, she also felt anticipation. She felt so charged with energy and excitement that she wanted to jump right out of her skin. It seemed inevitable that they’d end up like this. They had been dancing this dance since they met.

  Aya acknowledged that she wanted this to happen. She wanted Ryo in a way that she never wanted anyone. Ever.

  She looked up at him. He loomed over her, still and unmoving, content to watch the play of emotions on her face. Patient enough to let her think things through and decide.

  At her prolonged silence, he seemed to come to the wrong conclusion. Slowly he moved back a fraction. It was but a mere millimeter of space, but she felt his resolve. He wouldn’t push her.

  She pressed closer and when his eyes flew to hers, she smiled the smile. “Ryo?”

  “Hai?”

  “Let’s do it.” Then she let go of the towel.

  There were a few seconds of shocked silence before he laughed and wrapped his arms around her.

  She groaned. The feel of his hands on her naked body was marvelous. She wanted more.

  “Chotto, let me do it.” Ryo laughed as she attacked his shirt.

  “You’re overdressed.”

  “That’s easily remedied.”

  “You’re too slow.”

  “And you’re too bossy.”

  Aya shrieked when he swept her up into his arms. Giggling, she landed on the bed. Her laughter died when he took off his shirt and lay down beside her.

  “So this is really happening, huh?” Aya ran a finger over his face.

  “You having second thoughts?”

  She laughed. “Hell, no.”

  “I thought not.”

  It was a long time before either of them spoke again.

  Chapter 15

  “You looked pleased with yourself.”

  “I am.” Ryo grinned.

  She rolled her eyes. “If you grinned any wider, your face would crack.”

  “You always this snippy after sex?”

  “Not always. Just with you.” Aya licked her lips and with satisfaction, saw that Ryo’s followed the movement hungrily with his eyes. Her breath hitched as she watched him watch her.

  Dear god, she’d just had some and she wanted him again. This couldn’t possibly be healthy, could it?

  Certainly, she’d been intimate with Adrian—but it had been comfortable and easy. But she had never been this . . . free with him.

  It had never been fun. She’d never thought it’d be fun to bicker and tease and argue . . . in bed. But with Ryo, it was just like foreplay.

  It had never held a sense of urgency. She’d never felt like she wanted to tear his clothes off or sink her teeth into his skin. She certainly felt that way with Ryo—like she couldn’t get enough.

  A loud rumble rent the silence.

  “Sorry.” Ryo patted his stomach and they both laughed.

  “My poor cookie monster is hungry.” Still giggling, Aya sat up. “Do you want to call for pizza? I think I still have some cookies . . . Oh!”

  Ryo had hauled her back into his arms. He nuzzled the back of her neck. “The pizza can wait.”

  Aya shivered as his lips trailed down her back. “But you’re hungry.”

  His hands came up to cup her breasts. “Sou. Hungry for you.”

  “Did you really just say that?”

  “What? Romantic, deshou?” Ryo bit her earlobe playfully. One of his hands tweaked her nipple, while the other traveled further down.

  As she leaned back into him, Aya thought his bed talk needed a bit of work, but she could live with it.

  Her last thought before she came was that she could really get used to this.

  + + +

  “Hai!” Aya noted her sing-songy response to the peal of her doorbell. Chuckling, she grabbed her wallet. She couldn’t seem to wipe the silly smile off her face. Good sex probably does that to a person, she thought, as she headed toward the door.

  Without checking through the peephole, she swung the door open. But instead of the pizza that she and Ryo had ordered, Adrian stood there.

  “Oh. Hey.” There went her good mood.

  “Aya. Uh, how are you?” He shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot.

  “Um, I’m all right.” Better than all right actually. However, Aya thought it wasn’t in good form to tell your ex that you’d just had the best sex of your life. Instead, she asked, “What’s up?”

  “Can I come in? I wanted to talk to you about—”

  “Ne, Aya-chan. That the pizza?”

  For a moment, Aya wished the floor would open up and swallow her. She saw the shock on Adrian’s face, as Ryo—freshly showered and shirtless—stepped out of the bathroom.

  “No . . . uh . . . it’s someone else.”

  Ryo pulled a shirt on and came to stand next to her. “Daijoubu? Is everything all right?”

  This is awkward, Aya thought. “Um. Ryo, this is Adrian. Adrian, this is Ryo.” Her companion started, and Aya knew he recognized Adrian’s name. But he smiled and bowed in acknowledgement. Adrian did the same.

  Ryo laid a light hand on Aya’s shoulder. “I’m going to run down to the conbini for a bit. Do you want me to stay?”

  Aya shook her head. Some battles were better fought alone. But she appreciated the supportive squeeze that Ryo gave her shoulder as he moved past Adrian.

  Aya and Adrian were both silent as they watched Ryo disappear down the hall.

  “So that’s what you’ve been busy with.” Adrian’s laugh was bitter. “Or should I say, who you’ve been busy with?”

  “What do you care?”

  “Aya, we were together once . . .”

  “I don’t see how that gives you the right to pry into my life.”

  “I just . . .”

  “What do you want, Adrian?”

  Turning to face her, she saw that his jaw was set. He was silent for a few seconds before he answered. “I know you’ve been avoiding student events because you didn’t want to run into me. I wanted to clear the air. I was worried that you might be shutting other people out, but obviously that’s not the case.”

  “As you can see, I’m doing fine.” Aya folded her arms as she leaned on the doorjamb.

  “Yup. More than fine.”

  Her eyes narrowed at the obvious sarcasm in his tone. “Maybe you should just leave, Adrian.”

  Adrian shook his head. “I’m disappointed in you, Aya. This isn’t like you at all.”

  “You don’t have any right to be disappointed in me.”

  “We’re friends, Aya. I care about you. And this,”—he swept his arms toward where Ryo had gone—“this was never you.”

  “I’m sorry, but I have to correct your little misconception. We were friends. But we aren’t anymore. Goodbye, Adrian.” Aya reached to close the door.

  He made to turn away, but looked back one last time. “Aya. Just don’t forget.”

  “Forget what?”

  “Why you’re here. To study . . . to represent our country.”

  “What exactly are
you saying?”

  “Well, it wouldn’t reflect well on the student community if you’re caught slacking off and sleeping around.”

  “Cut the bullshit, Adrian.” Her voice was soft, but full of anger. “Look, not that it’s any of your business, but I am not slacking off and I am certainly not sleeping around. We aren’t together any longer. And what I do is no concern of yours. Now, perhaps you’d leave before I find more coffee to pour over you?”

  With much satisfaction, she closed the door in his face.

  + + +

  “Did he want you back?”

  Aya snorted at Ryo’s question. “What? No!”

  “So . . . what did he want?”

  Swallowing a bite of pizza, Aya looked up at him and shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about him.”

  Ryo finished a whole slice before he nudged her. “Do you still . . . uh . . . have feelings for him?”

  Tilting her head, she considered him. “Hmm. I never pegged you for a guy who liked to talk about feelings.”

  “Baka.” Ryo reached for another slice. “Forget I said anything.”

  “Are you jealous?”

  “Why should I be? Minutes before he arrived, I had you screaming my name.”

  “I did not scream.”

  “You did too! You might want to apologize to your neighbors for being so loud.”

  He growled when Aya hit him with a pillow. He tackled her and they ended up rolling on the floor, gasping for air, as they laughed and tickled each other. A little later, their gasps weren’t entirely as wholesome.

  Their pizza grew cold, but they didn’t mind that either.

  + + +

  Sometime during the night, as she lay snuggled in Ryo’s arms, Aya thought about what her ex had said.

  It bothered her.

  In a way, he was right. It wasn’t like her to be this impulsive. After all, they’d been together almost four years before he even got to third base. And now, she hadn’t even been in Tokyo four months and well . . . here she was.

  Not that the newly awakened lusty side of her minded.

  But somewhere, at the back of her mind, the logical, over-thinking part was telling her that Ryo was a bad bet.