Love's Secret Torment

by Stacy L. Darnell

“Hmm, cryptic much?” I pouted.

  “Why don’t you go inside, grab a shower, and get dressed, maybe a light sweater would be a good idea, too.”

  A light sweater? Was he crazy? It was in the high seventies outside, not hot, but certainly not cold enough for a sweater. In fact, it was my favorite time of year. It was absolutely beautiful outside.

  I ran inside and showered. I dressed in my favorite jeans and his worn Falcons t-shirt. It was so comfortable, and I was going to keep it as long as possible. My sweater caught my eye as I walked out of my closet. I shook my head and grabbed it before leaving my room.

  When I walked downstairs, Alec was having a cup of coffee with my mom and dad. They were outside, my parents at the porch table and Alec sitting on our swing, all of them laughing. He patted the seat beside him, and I walked over and sat down. When he handed me my latte, I smiled knowing he’d heated it in the microwave for it to still be nice and hot.

  “Well we better get going, Samone. Mr. and Mrs. Lang, always a pleasure.” He kissed the top of my mom’s hand and shook my dad’s.

  Mom laughed. “Alec, you’re such a charmer.”

  “You kids have a great time today,” my dad replied as he slipped a folded paper into Alec’s fist when they shook hands goodbye.

  I looked at Alec, curious what that was all about.

  We drove for about forty-five minutes. I watched out the windows, looking for some clue to where we were going. Finally, we came to a field with a lone warehouse and something I couldn’t quite make out in the distance. The sign, however, answered my ever-growing curiosity, and I squealed with glee.

  “We’re going on a hot air balloon ride!”

  He chuckled as he pulled his truck up into the parking area.

  We went inside, and he signed us in as Alec Morris and Samone Lang. I smiled as my mind flashed to the inside tab of my school folder where I had doodled Mrs. Samone Morris about a thousand times.

  We took a seat in the waiting area. Alec rested his hand on my thigh as I flipped through an issue of Travel and Leisure they had in a magazine rack. The man behind the counter called our names, and we walked up and had to show our ID’s. It was then Alec pulled out the folded piece of paper my dad had handed him. It was a parental consent form since I was still seventeen. I looked up at him and he winked. Smartass always thought of everything.

  The man led us outside behind the warehouse, and we rode in a little golf cart out to the large object I couldn’t quite make out earlier. It was a hot air balloon. They were just now lighting the fire in the basket to begin filling the balloon with air while it laid on its side on the ground. As another man walked over, I smiled up at Alec and squeezed his hand. He kissed the top of my head.

  “I love you,” he whispered in my hair.

  “I love you right back.”

  The new man was introduced to us as our pilot. We listened to the safety rules, and when he finished, I looked over and saw that the balloon was fully upright. Holy hell . . . it was gigantic. My heart started hammering with anticipation, and I could hardly wait to get in the basket and start our ride.

  He squeezed my hand in his. “Are you excited?”

  “Yes, I can’t wait! Oh Alec, this is the best! Thank you so much for this amazing surprise!”

  We followed the pilot in, and as the balloon rose, the earth grew smaller. When I shivered in the cool air, Alec helped me into my sweater. Wow, he really did think of everything. He rubbed my arms, and hugged me close as we looked out over Georgia. The landscape was beautiful. There were green trees everywhere. We sailed over Red Top Mountain and Allatoona Lake. I’d never realized it before, but it wasn’t shaped like a typical lake. It was a big body of water, but it weaved through the land like a finger tracing a squiggly line. As we drifted toward Fort Mountain, there were ponds and smaller lakes scattered about the land. We saw baseball, soccer, and football fields. The cars and trucks seemed so small from the balloon. It truly felt like we were floating on a cloud, and the sky was clear and beautiful.

  We were in visual range and saw Fort Mountain. It was even more breathtaking from that vantage point. He pointed out a lake we’d camped near once. Alec held my hand in his and we talked of our plans for after graduation and watched the birds flying below us. He pointed to different landmarks and noted where we were gliding above.

  “I have an idea. What if, after we graduate, instead of staying on campus at Kennesaw State, we got an apartment together? My inheritance is enough that it would cover the cost of a simple apartment. We wouldn’t need anything fancy.” Alec said.

  “Oh, yes!” I squealed.

  “Do you think your parents will be okay with us living together?”

  “Well I’ll be eighteen then, and they’ve always encouraged me to follow my heart. Plus, it helps that they adore you.”

  I was so excited I couldn’t wait to start looking at ads in the newspaper. I just hoped Mom and Dad would go for it. Alec was serious about school, so I knew it wouldn’t get in the way of my studies.

  I hoped we’d get accepted at Kennesaw State.

  “Have you chosen a major yet?” I asked him.

  “Yeah, English, I think. I’m sure you’re not surprised.” He laughed. “I’ve always wanted to be a teacher, and you know English is my favorite subject, so it just makes sense. I’ll do something that encompasses the things I like best. My dad always said if you love your job, that’s more than half the battle of life since you spend so much time of your day doing it. What about you?”

  “I think I’m going to study psychology. I’ve always wanted to help people, and there are so many psychological illnesses. It’s misunderstood, and a lot of people need help with it. I’d like to help them have live happier everyday lives and feel better.”

  He smiled at me with that grin of his. “Samone, you’ll make the best psychologist ever, I can’t imagine anyone with a bigger or more caring heart.”

  When the ride ended, it felt too soon, and I didn’t want the trip to be over. We thanked the pilot for an amazing excursion, and Alec drove us to our park.

  With the excitement of my surprise, I hadn’t noticed the cooler in the back of his truck. As he grabbed it, I picked up the blanket and small basket sitting beside it.

  We walked over to our oak tree, which was thankfully clear of people. Spreading the blanket on the ground, I opened the basket as Alec pulled bottles of water out of the cooler, an apple, pastrami sandwiches, and a small baggie of cheddar cheese cubes. We sat and ate our lunch together under our tree. After we finished, Alec leaned back against the tree and I lay down with my head in his lap. He combed his fingers through my hair with the most delicate touch. Between the balloon ride and our lunch under the tree, it was the most beautiful day ever . . . one I would never forget.

  The next morning, Tricia came into town for Jolie’s memorial dinner, and I couldn’t wait to spend some quality time with my sister.

  “Hey, Tricia!” I called as I came downstairs to see her at the table having coffee with Mom and Dad. She got up and gave me a hug.

  “How’s my little sis? Looking adorable as usual, I see. Are you ready for our spa day?”

  “I’m great, thanks, but what about you? Did you have a good drive down? When did you get here?” I replied as I stretched my arms up above my head.

  “Yeah, it was good, and virtually no traffic, so I got here early and had a cup of coffee with Mom and Dad while waiting for your sleepy head to wake up,” she said, making us all laugh.

  “We should get going soon, or we’ll be dealing with the Atlanta traffic.”

  “Yeah, just give me a minute. I’ll be right back.”

  I ran upstairs and grabbed my sandals then met Tricia outside. She owned the cutest car, a red Nissan Juke. I hadn’t seen it before; she bought it after her last visit home. Mom and Dad were outside checking it out.

  “Wow! Your new car is amazing! I love it.”

  She smiled. “Thanks, Sam. Now let’s get in and go so w
e aren’t late.”

  Traffic was light. I told her about the hot air balloon ride Alec had taken me on.

  “Damn, he sounds like a keeper.”

  “I know. I’m in love with him. He asked me to get an apartment with him while we go to KSU. Hopefully, we’ll both get accepted. If Mom and Dad are okay with it, he wants to start looking right after graduation so we’re ready and moved in before classes start in the fall.”

  “Wow. So you really think Mom and Dad will be cool with that?”

  “Yes, I do. Tricia, they love Alec. He’s kind of an old soul, and I think they can relate to him. Plus, he’s responsible about everything; I think they’ll feel better knowing I’ll be living with him rather than on my own.”

  “If you say so. Damn. That never would have flown with me. ‘No, Tricia, this; no, Tricia, that.’ It’s true, you know, what they say . . . that the babies of the family are spoiled with the lax rules.” Narrowing her eyes in my direction, she added, “You’re lucky I love you so much.”

  As we picked out our nail polish, we giggled at some of the colors they had available. When they called us back to begin our pampering treatments, we looked at each other and sighed. Our facials were heavenly, the manicures, and pedicures were just what we needed to unwind.

  After we finished, we grabbed a late lunch. Then spent the rest of the day walking around the mini-mall.

  “Sam, check out that window display in Cindy’s Boutique.”

  “Oh, wow! That’s really cute.”

  She smiled. “Yeah, let’s go see if they have our sizes.”

  We walked inside and went directly to the sales rack with the window display clothing.

  “Awesome! Let’s go try these on.” I said.

  We walked back and waved to Cindy. She was the sweetest lady and always had the latest, trendy clothes to choose from. As I slipped my dress on, I imagined how Alec’s face would look when he saw me in it, I suddenly felt flushed and excited.

  “Tricia, I want to see your dress, so come out when you’ve got it on,” I whispered.

  “Okay.”

  I was standing at the tri-mirror, looking at the front, back, and sides of the dress. I loved it. Tricia came out of her changing stall, looking like a runway model. She was beautiful.

  “Wow, you look great!”

  “Thanks. I really like it,” she said, blushing.

  She looked me up and down with a sly smile. “Yours looks fantastic, I bet that boyfriend of yours will love it!” She wiggled her eyebrows.

  “Oh God, Tricia, stop. You’re embarrassing me.”

  “I’m just saying how I see it. Besides, he’s a guy. Of course he’s going to love the way it hugs your curves.”

  “Now you’re just making it worse,” I deadpanned.

  “Okay, okay.” She raised her hands in surrender. “Geez.”

  We changed back into our clothes and walked to the counter to make our purchases.

  Putting our bags in the back of her car, she held her hand against her chest in mock disdain, “Good Lord, now I’m gonna have to find a guy to take me somewhere to wear this dress, you know that, right, Sam?”

  I blushed. She was perceptive as always.

  “Yes, yes, I know, you already have Alec,” she teased.

  My phone beeped with a text message. I looked at the lock screen and saw it was from Alec.

  A: Sorry I took so long to reply. I can come to dinner.

  Me: Great! I’ll see you tomorrow.

  A: Ok.

  I shook my head. Usually he ended our texts with Love you always.

  Me: I love you.

  A: You, too.

  “Huh,” I muttered to myself.

  “What’s that?” Tricia asked.

  “Oh, nothing. Umm, Alec is coming to dinner tomorrow though.”

  “Sweet.” She drew out the word.

  “God, Tricia, please don’t embarrass me.”

  “Stop, you know I won’t,” she admonished, “Let’s call Mom on the way home, and see if she needs anything from the store for tomorrow’s dinner. Aunt Olivia should be arriving soon,” she said.

  “Okay, sounds good.”

  Senior year was flying by. I was on my way to my car after lunch to get a bracelet I’d made Heather for her birthday when I saw Alec getting out of his truck. He’d been acting strange for a couple weeks.

  “Hey, baby,” I called as I ran up to him.

  “Huh? Oh. Hi Samone,” he murmured.

  I paused and stepped back, looking up at the guy I loved. “Alec, why are you just getting to school? It’s lunchtime. Is everything all right? You’ve been acting weird lately.”

  “Everything’s fine. I’ve just—been busy. Not a big deal.” He roughed his hands through his hair. “Look, I’m running late as it is. I’ll catch up with you later.”

  He brushed past me, heading toward the school office. I leaned back against his truck and wondered what the hell that was all about. I had to find out what was going on, whether he wanted to tell me or not. This evasive crap had to stop.

  I met up with Heather in my last class of the day and gave her the bracelet I’d made.

  “It’s beautiful, Sam! Thank you.” She covered her mouth, looking around, “Phew, I thought for sure Mr. Meade heard me.”

  “You’re welcome. I’m glad you like it,” I said as I put my head down on my desk with a thunk.

  “Hey, what’s wrong?”

  “I don’t know. It’s Alec. Something’s not right, and I wish I knew what it was.”

  “Oh, he’s just a guy. Who knows what causes their mano-pausal mood swings.” She laughed.

  Heather pulled a chuckle from me, too, half-hearted, but it was better than nothing.

  “Sam, that guy is in love with you. Everyone knows it. We can all see it.”

  “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” I whispered.

  The bell rang, so we made our way to our cars. As we walked by Alec’s truck, we saw Peter standing at the front passenger side.

  “Peter!” Heather called as she ran up and hugged him from behind.

  He turned around and kissed her.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “Just checking out Alec’s truck. I was on my way to my car when I noticed it looked like he’d wrecked it.” He looked up at me. “Oh . . . hey, Sam.”

  “Wrecked? What? Let me see,” I shrieked.

  “There.” He pointed to the front bumper.

  I gasped and my hand flew to my mouth as I saw the damage.

  “Maybe that’s why he was weird this morning,” Heather said.

  “No, well yeah . . . maybe, but he’s been acting weird for a couple weeks.” I groaned.

  “Ah Sam, don’t worry about it. He probably just slept like shit,” Peter said as he took Heather’s bag. “We gotta get going. See ya around.”

  “How can I not worry?” I murmured.

  “It’ll be okay. Remember . . . he loves you. I’ll call ya later.”

  “Okay, bye guys.” I waved.

  I stood there, staring at the mangled metal. I decided to wait for Alec to come out. As the minutes passed, I was torn between being worried and angry. Finally, he walked out to his truck. The grim set of his mouth made me momentarily consider letting the issue go, but I had to make sure he was all right.

  “Alec, are you okay? What happened to your truck?”

  “I’m fine. I’ll get it fixed. Don’t worry about it.”

  My jaw hung open as I looked at him, not quite sure I knew who was talking to me anymore.

  “Of course I’m gonna worry! You were late for school . . . again. Clearly, you were involved in a car accident. One minute you won’t talk to me, and the next you’re taking me on hot air balloon rides. Just tell me what’s going on, please.”

  He ran his hands through his hair and sighed. “I’m sorry. Yes, I ran into a road barricade this morning. But I’m fine. It’s just a little damage to my truck. That’s why I was late.” He pulled me to him a
nd wrapped his arms around me. My shoulders relaxed as he leaned down and kissed me softly. “Love you always.”

  “I love you, too.”

  I’d never had a girlfriend longer than a few months, let alone over a year. It was nearing Christmas, and we were almost half through our senior year. Classes were good, especially the ones I had with Samone. School was easy for me. Sometimes it was too easy, and my mind would drift back to when I lived in Florida. It would always dwell on the worst day of my life.

  At least in the classes we had together, she would pick up on my mood change and distract me from my own personal hell. The way her soft, rose-colored lips would turn up in a smile, and the look of love in her eyes affected me in those dark moments, was a miracle in and of itself.

  I left to pick up Samone for a hike at Sweetwater Creek State Park. My truck ran a little rough, so I knew it was time for a tune-up. I didn’t mind though. I loved working on my truck. It reminded me of when Dad taught Emjay and me about engines, and we started working on his Camaro together. That was a fun project with good memories, it meant the world to me, especially now. I made a mental note to take some time tomorrow morning and give it a good look over and an oil change.

  Pulling into Samone’s driveway, I saw her sitting on the front porch swing. The way her face lit up when she saw my truck made me smile. It made me feel like an asshole, too. She was right. Something was wrong. I just couldn’t talk to her about it yet.

  She was amazing and the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen. She had the kindest heart and was extremely smart. Her level of creativity was remarkable. I had no doubt she could sell the jewelry she’d made.

  I was glad we’d run into each other at the charity event. I’m not sure why, but I had to talk to her that day. I had to know her. Now I did, and my feelings for her were unlike anything I’d ever felt before. I could see us together for a long time, maybe even forever if we were lucky. I knew a good thing when I saw it, and Samone Lang was definitely that.

  “Hey, my uptown girl,” I said as I got out of my truck.

  “Hi yourself,” she said, smiling up to me.