Songbird

by Josephine Cox

  Ellen had been fast asleep. “Good grief, Maddy! Whatever’s the matter?” Yawning and groaning, Ellen asked her what she was doing, ringing up at that time of the morning? The baby had been awake, fretting with his teeth, and she was exhausted.

  Maddy launched into a long explanation, about how Brad had proposed to her

  “So, you see how it is,” she said. “I’m over the moon at the thought of being Brad’s wife, but I’m in such a predicament. If we do marry, I’ll be more than happy to take on Brad’s young son, Robin, and Brad knows that. But at the same time, he will have to take on Michael. Yet I’m afraid to tell him about Michael, and I’m afraid not to.” She gazed out at the chilly village green through the murky panes of the red kiosk.

  Wide awake now, and on the alert, Ellen spoke her mind. “It’s all a bit quick, isn’t it? Are you sure he’s not just after what he can get, and then it’s ‘on your bike and thank you very much’?”

  Maddy could not be more sure. “I think I’ve loved him all along and never let myself believe it – or that he loved me. But he does, and oh Ellen, I’m so happy.” She paused, looking for a suitable solution. “I’ve thought and thought, and there is no other way. He simply has to know that I’ve got a son. If and when he meets Michael, I’m sure he’ll love him so much that nothing else will matter.”

  Ellen was frantic. This news was the last thing she could have imagined.

  “Ellen?” Maddy wondered at the silence. She put more coins in. “Look, I know this is all out of the blue, and I know it won’t be easy. But I do so want you to be happy for me.”

  The other girl collected herself and managed to say, “So what are you going to do next? And where do I come in?”

  Maddy took a deep breath. “Well, either I take a calculated risk, and come up to Blackpool to get Michael or you bring him down here – or even meet me halfway, if you’d rather?”

  Ellen was not best pleased. “So, you’re throwing caution to the winds just for a man, eh, even after I told you about the call from the hospital, and the suspicions I have that we’re being watched. You’re honestly telling me that, after all this time of running and hiding, you’d put your son at risk by taking him halfway across the country? Well, I won’t be a part of it,” she said peevishly. “Seems to me, you’re not thinking straight.”

  She needed to change Maddy’s mind. “Your man should also know that Michael’s father, your ex-boss and sweetheart, is a convicted murderer. And you’ll need to tell him all that before he meets Michael. No matter how you say it, Maddy, he’s not going to like it, not one bit. In fact, that could spell the end of your relationship. Who would want to get mixed up with the ex-girlfriend of Steve Drayton, eh?”

  Maddy was astonished at Ellen’s almost violent reaction. She put it down to having woken her out of a deep sleep. “I thought you might be pleased that I’ve found a man I truly love, and who loves me,” she said, abashed. “I thought you wanted the same as I did – for me and Michael to have a proper home, not just foisting ourselves on you and Grandad Bob.”

  Cursing herself for not feigning a degree of sympathy, and maybe even having risked arousing Maddy’s suspicions, Ellen apologized. “I’m a bit cranky this morning,” she said quietly. These days, lying had become second nature: “I’ve been up with the baby most of the night.”

  “Well, there you are.” Maddy understood. “That only goes to prove what I’m saying – that you’ve done so much for Michael and me, and it’s time I took the burden off your hands.”

  “And how do you expect to do that?” Ellen asked worriedly. “Even if you take Michael from me, nothing’s changed. The fact that you want to get married doesn’t mean the danger has gone away. It doesn’t mean that Drayton won’t want you and Michael off the face of the earth! So tell me, how will you be any safer than you were before?”

  Maddy shoveled in some more 20p coins, admitting, “You’re right, I’ll admit I may not have fully thought it through. But Brad has already guessed that I’m hiding a secret; he’s told me that whatever it is, he’ll help me. And he will, I know it.”

  Ellen forced herself to stay calm, but the fear of losing Michael was all she could think of. “Look, Maddy, this new man of yours might mean well, but the poor bloke doesn’t know what he’s taking on.”

  “I promise you, Ellen, I’ve already thought of that, and even if it all goes wrong, I’ve decided I still want Michael with me. I just can’t go on without him. So, this is how I see it. I either come and get him, or you can bring him to me. Stay awhile, if you like, or stay for good. There’s room enough, and it would be great to have you near. You’re my one and only friend, Ellen. And I do miss you so.” She would never forget how Ellen had stood by her through the worst time in her life.

  Ellen remained silent while Maddy finished explaining. “The choice is yours,” she said. “Either way, I need my son here when I tell Brad the truth. I know in my heart that he won’t turn us away. He loves me and I love him, and he will help us. Somehow or other, Brad will find a way.” She had to believe that. “So, do you think you can bring him here?” she asked now. “Or do you want me to come and fetch him? I’ll be careful. I’ll travel at night, stay indoors during the day, then travel on the night coach back to here.”

  “No!” Ellen almost lost control, but there was too much at stake to risk everything now, so she took a deep breath and went on in a quiet tone, “No, Maddy. The danger is still here for you – for all of us. Look, don’t worry. I’ll bring him to you. I’ll travel like you suggested. That way, we might just get away with it.”

  As they made their plans, for Ellen to travel down in two days’ time, Maddy was beside herself with joy. The prospect of holding her baby in her arms again, and seeing Ellen, was something wonderful, though she knew the risks were real. With her heart in her mouth, she said, “Be very careful. Please?”

  “I will. Maddy, you know you can trust me.” And that was the biggest lie of all.

  Maddy had always trusted Ellen, who she regarded as being like a sister, “All right. But you must take every precaution… keep a wary eye out.”

  A few moments later, having arranged to make the journey over the weekend when there would be more people about, Maddy replaced the phone.

  For what seemed an age Ellen paced up and down, thinking, making her own plans, determined that come what may, she would not give Michael up, “You’re not having him!” She glanced at the phone, “I can’t give him up. Not to you… not to anyone.” Her loyalty to Maddy meant nothing compared to her love for the child.

  Being Tuesday, Grandad Bob had gone into town to place his weekly bet. At five-thirty he returned home to find Ellen sitting at the kitchen table in subdued mood. “All right, sweetheart?” He went to the sink and filled the kettle. “Fancy a brew?”

  Ellen shook her head, “No thanks, Grandad.”

  “Well, I’m gasping. It were that hot and crowded in the bookies, I were sure I’d pass out.” He went over and looked at Michael, lying asleep in his pram, then made his tea and brought it to the table. “You’re a bit quiet, lass. What’s up?”

  “Just thinking.”

  “Well, whatever it is you’re thinking, I’d stop it and think o’ summat else, ’cause it seems to be mekkin’ yer miserable.” Bending his head to see her better, he asked, “A trouble shared is a trouble halved. Did yer know that?”

  “I’m not troubled, Grandad.”

  She had been. But not any more, because now she knew what she must do; although when contemplating the shocking consequences, she did not feel good about it. Yet she comforted herself with the belief that it was Maddy herself who had forced her into it.

  It was visiting time at Brixton Prison. Drayton’s man, Danny, had something to report, and he was not looking forward to it.

  When the door opened and Drayton strode forward, dark and scowling as ever, the little man noticed the bruised swelling on his cheekbone. He was curious but would not dare ask, so he waited as Dray
ton threw himself moodily into the chair. “Well?” His flat, staring eyes fell on Danny, sending a shiver through his spine. “What have you got for me? Something useful, I hope.”

  Finding it hard to keep his gaze from that raw, angry swelling on Drayton’s face, Danny forced himself to concentrate on the matter in hand. “It’s not good,” he began gabbling. “I tried every which way to talk that nurse round, but she was having none of it.”

  “I might have known it. Useless, the lot of you!” Taking a breath that doubled the size of his chest, Drayton leaned forward. “Did you make up to her like I said – flattery… money? Did you offer her whatever she wanted?”

  “I swear, I did all that. But she’s one of them rare women who can’t be swayed by fancy promises. Would you credit it, she actually believes in marriage? Dotes on her husband, so I believe.”

  For too long a moment, Drayton stared at him, the tips of his fingers drumming on the table.

  “Lord knows, I tried. I followed her like a puppy after its master, offering all sorts of inducements. But she threatened to report me if I didn’t leave her alone, so I backed off. You can see how it was.”

  “So, is she the only woman who works behind the desk at the maternity unit?” Exasperated, Drayton momentarily closed his eyes. “I’m surrounded by damned fools!”

  “The other women were too official – they’d have you thrown out, soon as look at you. But there’s a young fella, recently taken on from what I can gather. He’s one of the porters, forever flitting in and out behind the main reception desk. As he’s going out with one of the nurses, I reckoned he might be my best bet, so I got friendly with him – told him my mother was in for regular treatment with her arthritis. The thing is, I’m making headway with him.”

  Pleased with himself, he gave a nervous little grin. “I’ve already found out that he owes money, and that his girl is pushing him to get wed. So it’s only a matter of time before he’s desperate enough to get me the address we’re after.”

  Drayton momentarily lost concentration. He had other problems behind these prison walls, without having to tell idiots like Danny Boy what to do. “I don’t give a bugger who you talk to, or chat up, or even go to bed with.” In a dark, impatient mood, he seemed to bounce on the chair, his big outstretched hands nervously twitching. “I want this done – and quick. Do whatever you have to do. Whatever it takes. Just get that address.”

  He lounged back in his chair, as though letting Danny dwell on his instructions. Then he leaned forward, bent his head like a venomous snake and hissed out a final warning. “I won’t have that bitch getting the better of me. The next time you come here, you’d best be telling me that you’ve done what you were sent to do. Or so help me, it’ll be your neck on the line.”

  From the way he kept glancing about and twitching, it seemed to Danny like Drayton was on drugs or something. “Are you all right, guv?”

  For a moment, the other man gave no reply. Instead he stared at Danny as though he was having difficulty concentrating. “Tell me, Danny Boy, have I given you a job that’s too big to handle? Is that it?”

  “No, boss. I’ve said I’ll find her and I will. I’m this far,” he pinched his fingers together, “from finding out where she went after leaving the hospital. We’re also covering other avenues besides the hospital. I’ve got the men on their toes, and because she had the baby in Blackburn, and Jimmy sighted her in Lytham, it follows that she would live in the area, though I accept the possibility that she’s long gone from there.”

  “Don’t assume the obvious. She’s a cunning bitch.” Had he once loved her? Drayton thought drowsily. For a second, sweet music – the sound of his Songbird singing onstage – filled his memory, as well as a vision of her seductive beauty, and her smile… The moment lingered, and caught inside it, he recalled the sensation of happiness. But then it faded, being quickly replaced by a black wave of fury.

  “Look, boss, she’s bound to make a false move soon,” Danny whined. “We’re closing in, I can promise you that. It hasn’t been easy. Up to now, she’s either been very clever, or damned lucky.”

  “Lucky, eh? Well, you listen to me, Danny Boy. I’m stuck here in this damned hellhole, having to rely on scum such as you. You say she’s been lucky. Well, you won’t be so lucky if the next time you come here, you haven’t done the job I’m paying you for.” He smiled that wicked, unstable smile. “I hope you’re getting my gist… Danny Boy?”

  When Danny opened his mouth to answer, Drayton got up, sauntered over to the officer on duty, and without a backward glance, gestured to be taken out.

  Behind him, Danny lost no time in getting outside to the fresh air, where he stood a moment, reflecting on Drayton’s increasingly odd demeanor. “Mad!” He scurried off down the street. “Mad as a bleeding hatter!”

  There was no doubt in hs mind. Drayton had made a direct and chilling threat to him. “If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll get this job done,” he muttered. “He wants the girl and he wants the kid. Like he said, I’d better get the job done – and soon!”

  Twenty-one

  The day following Maddy’s phone call, Ellen had finalized her plans, right down to the last detail.

  And now, on this Thursday morning, and still in her dressing gown, she bade cheerio to her grandfather, who was leaving for a day at the races with his old friend Jasper. “You enjoy yourselves,” she told them. “I’ll see you when you get back, Grandad.”

  “I’m not sure I’m looking forward to it,” he confided when Jasper went to play pat-a-cake with Michael. “I had a real bad night with me left knee, and to be honest, I’d rather go straight back to bed.”

  “Aw, you’ll love it.” Ellen wanted him out of the way. “You and Jasper haven’t been out together for months, not since he had his hip operation. But look at him – he’s raring to go now, aren’t you, Jasper, and once you’re there, you’ll have a wonderful time. So go on,” she said, handing him the bag of sandwiches and a flask, “take this. There’s enough in there to keep the pair of you going all day long.” And then some, she hoped.

  After the two men had gone off in Grandad’s Rover, she carried Michael upstairs and put him in the playpen amongst a collection of his favorite toys. She then quickly rooted through her wardrobe. After some deliberation, she put on a burgundy-colored jumper and a pair of blue Levis, together with a short green anorak which she had last worn the night before she left for the bright lights of London town.

  The garments still fitted her. In fact, if anything, they were a little loose, though that might work to her advantage, she thought. She then located a long-time favorite, a denim baseball cap, together with her sunglasses, and put both items in her coat pocket.

  Next, she filled a large overnight bag with clean underwear, a couple of other jumpers and tops, two more pairs of jeans and a second pair of shoes. She then squashed in a pile of Michael’s freshly ironed garments, and a number of spare nappies and other necessities. Then, after pushing the lot down as far as she could, she zipped up the bag and set it aside, next to a carrier bag crammed with their toiletries.

  She then got Michael dressed and ready, and carried him downstairs, where she strapped him in his pushchair with a biscuit to keep him quiet. She had a freshly made bottle of baby food, two rusks, a banana and two jars of Cow & Gate meals for later.

  “Now, where does he put it?” Standing in the kitchen, chewing on her fingers, she tried to remember where her grandfather kept his “rainy-day” money. He had always been adamant; “You need to keep a bit o’ ready cash for emergencies. After all, banks don’t open on a weekend, do they?”

  Suddenly it came to her. “Aha!” She distinctly recalled him mentioning something about… Hurrying to the hallway, she opened the understairs cupboard and stooping low, switched on the light. Peering into every shadowy corner, she could see nothing that might be a savings box, or biscuit tin.

  Disappointed, she felt in every corner, cleared the shelves and tidied them up ag
ain, and still there was nothing. “I wonder…” Scrutinizing the old brown lino on the floor, she spotted a loose section and lifted it up. One of the wooden planks beneath was clearly shaped to form a lid.

  Hooking her finger under the edge, she prized the board up, and there, nestled in the darkness, was an old baccy-tin. Inside, Ellen found a slim bundle of ten-pound notes; sitting cross-legged on the floor, she hurriedly counted them. “Two hundred pounds!” She sat there, feeling guilty and small, and for the moment unable to bring herself to take the money from her old grandad.

  However, when Michael started crying, she came out of the spell. If only she didn’t have to do this, but her money had run out. She couldn’t resist treating the baby to expensive outfits, and hadn’t earned a penny for six long months, and so her savings had dwindled. The rent money from the house in Bethnal Green was spent almost as soon as it landed in her account.

  She would pay her beloved Grandad Bob back as soon as she could, the girl vowed.

  The baccy-tin was stuffed back into its hidey-hole, and everything was replaced as before.

  Tucking Michael’s dummy into his mouth she left the baby and, running up the stairs two at a time, she collected the overnight bag and checked around to make sure she had not forgotten anything.

  Satisfied, she returned downstairs and, after squashing the bag into the shelf beneath the pushchair, she went to the drawer and took out a writing pad and pen. It was time to tell some more lies.

  Dear Grandad,

  A letter just arrived from Maddy. She wants me and Michael to go to her straight away. Her aunt is home, and it seems she’s back on her feet again.

  The thing is, she wants to be on her own now. Maddy has been offered a job at the local garden center, and has found a cottage to rent.