Holdin' On for a Hero

by Ciana Stone

  “What?” Senna blurted. “You were responsible? Why, were you working for Slater, too?”

  “Against,” Colton corrected her. “And I did it because of who Chase is. Without him there was never a chance to make sure the project was completed as it should be.”

  Konnor’s face was a hard mask of anger. “Well, thanks for saving my life and all that but fuck you, Ryder.”

  “Konnor!” Senna exclaimed.

  “Well, think about it,” he turned to her. “If he had just let them kill us back then—all of us—then none of this would be happening. There would be no Sumer project and the whole goddamn planet wouldn’t be teetering on the edge of annihilation from lunatics like Slater and Kitaro.”

  Senna looked at Colton after a moment. “He has a point.”

  Colton looked at Minora before turning his attention to her. “I suppose that’s one way of looking at it. But consider this. If Lucas hadn’t figured it out, sooner or later someone else would have, possibly someone with far less ethics and morals.”

  “So what’s your stake in all this?” Konnor asked. “Just where do you fit in?”

  Again Colton looked at Minora before answering. “The Laserian family and I go back a long way. I became involved when Min discovered she was pregnant.”

  Senna looked over at Minora. “Pregnant? I didn’t know you had a child.”

  Minora looked from her to Lucas then to Colton. At last she sighed. “I suppose this is as good a time as any to be honest. You see as Colton said, I found myself in the position of being pregnant, unmarried and totally unprepared to handle the situation. At the same time, Lucas and Andrea were trying to have a child. They were not having any luck at it, however. As Andrea and I were very close, I went to her with my news. She came up with a solution to all our problems. Lucas had left the country about two months earlier and would not return for six or seven more months. She was supposed to join him in a few weeks. But she proposed that she contact Lucas and tell him she had discovered that she was pregnant but the doctors would not let her travel. She would insist that he continue with his work and say that I had insisted she stay with me until his return. I was to have the child and give it to them. At first I said no. I was torn between wanting to keep the baby myself and being petrified at the idea of being a single mother. But Andrea was very persuasive and finally I agreed. I gave birth to a daughter six-and-a-half months later. Andrea found an attorney to take care of all of the paperwork. There was no way anyone would ever discover our deception. She contacted Lucas and when he arrived three weeks later he met his daughter, Senna.”

  Senna looked at her in shock. “You mean you’re my real mother?”

  “Yes.”

  “And you…” She looked at Lucas. “You thought I was your real daughter?”

  “For many years,” he replied. “It was not until I began to suspect Andrea that I found out the truth.”

  “How did you find out?”

  “I told him,” Colton supplied the answer. “I discovered what Andrea and Marcus were up to with Slater and contacted Minora. She gave me permission to tell Lucas the truth.”

  Senna shook her head. It was all so convoluted and complicated. “And what about my father?” She directed the question to Minora. “Where was he during all this?”

  “I never told your father I was pregnant,” she answered.

  “Why?”

  “Because I didn’t want to be a burden. While I had no doubt that he would have done the honorable thing, I also knew that he had duties that overrode his obligation to me.”

  “So you never told him?”

  “No, I told him. After you were born. He was not happy with what I had done but understood my reasons.”

  “And did you ever plan on telling me the truth?”

  Minora shook her head. “No.”

  Senna considered it for a moment. “Okay, but will you tell me now who my father is?”

  “You will know in due time,” she replied.

  “I guess that means no?”

  “No, it means not right now. When he wants you to know, he’ll tell you himself.”

  “And how will I know it’s not just another person lying to me?” Senna asked in frustration.

  “You’ll know,” Minora smiled gently.

  Senna stared at her for a moment then reached across the table to take her hand. “All these years I’ve thought that if I could have any mother I wanted it would be you. I wish I had known it was you all along.”

  “Would it have made any difference in the way you feel?” Minora asked.

  A sense of something akin to relief washed over her. It all honesty it would not have made a difference. She had always loved Min like a mother. Giving her the title would not have changed the feelings. “No,” she admitted. “I’m glad to know it now and I’m proud to be your daughter. But…”

  Minora eyed her expectantly and Senna continued. “You lied to me, Min. All this time I thought you were cripple. Why did you do that?”

  “Senna, I—”

  Colton interrupted. “I have a couple of things to take care of. Don’t leave. Don’t even open the door. I’ll be back within two hours.”

  Minora walked with him to the door. Konnor turned to Senna. “I still have misgivings about trusting this guy. He never did give us a satisfactory explanation.”

  “And he probably won’t,” Lucas volunteered from the other side of the table. “But you can trust him,” he added when Konnor looked at him.

  For a long time Konnor said nothing. Minora walked through the room. “I think I’m going to lie down.” Lucas nodded and Senna gave her a hard look.. She started to leave the room but Senna stepped in her way.

  “We need to talk.”

  “I’m tired, Senna. Can’t this wait?”

  “No, it can’t. You lied to me. Let me believe that you were injured, in pain, suffering for God’s sake! You let me give up my job, Min. A job I loved. All so I could be close to you and keep an eye on you. You betrayed me and I want to know why.”

  “Senna, everything I’ve ever done has been to protect you. You have to believe that. I certainly didn’t like lying to you, and believe me, being confined to that damn wheel chair was no pleasure. But I had to do it. To keep you safe.”

  “From what? Or who?” Senna demanded.

  “Senna I promise I’ll explain everything to you, answer all of your questions in detail. But right now, I really am exhausted. Please, I beg you. Table this discussion until I’m rested. Please?”

  Senna didn’t want to agree, but caved in to the pleading expression on Min’s face. “Fine, but I’ll be expecting answers as soon as you wake.”

  “Yes, dear,” Min smiled and patted Senna’s cheek. “I promise.”

  Senna watched her leave the room and turned to look at Lucas and Konnor. Konnor was still staring heatedly at Lucas.

  Lucas sat calmly waiting under Konnor’s scrutiny until finally Konnor spoke. “You never lied to me, did you, Lucas?”

  “No, I didn’t.”

  “But you did use me.”

  “Only because you volunteered.”

  Senna looked at Konnor in surprise. “You volunteered? Why?”

  His skin flushed and he looked down. She was surprised. She had never seen him look embarrassed the way he did then. “Well?” she asked curiously. “Why?”

  “Because he was in love with you,” Lucas answered then hurriedly continued, “even though he would never have admitted it at the time.”

  “Is that true?” she asked him.

  Konnor looked at her and nodded. She took his hand and held on to it. “Why is that so embarrassing?”

  “You were a kid,” he explained.

  “I was seventeen, not exactly an infant.”

  “But not an adult either,” he argued. “Which I was supposed to be. It was…it bothered me that I could fall in love with someone so young. I thought it made me sort of an old pervert or something.”

  “Well,
if the shoe fits,” she teased him.

  “Hey!” He pulled his hand away.

  “I’m sorry,” she laughed then sobered as something occurred to her. “Konnor, that woman, the one you were in love with who died. Was that before or after…”

  “Neither,” he interrupted, and when her eyebrows rose in surprise, continued, “That was one of the false memories they implanted.”

  “But why give you a memory like that?” she asked.

  “You must understand,” Lucas spoke up. “Dealing with strong emotions is very tricky and difficult. Something as strong as love, especially passionate love, is very hard to erase. It is much easier to substitute one face for another. That way the emotions don’t have to be tampered with, only the facts and faces.”

  She thought about it for a moment. “Then what about me? Why was everything taken from me?”

  Lucas sighed. “You were… How can I put this? When I changed your memories, I implanted what I thought would be normal everyday memories for a teenage girl. I left the memories of your infatuation with Konnor untouched as I saw it as part of normal development. But then you were put through the process not once but twice more. Once by Marcus when he attempted to retrieve the information after Slater captured you, and again by Kitaro before you escaped and got back to the States.”

  She got up and walked back and forth for a few seconds, thinking back. “So, I wasn’t taken to Kitaro first,” she murmured, trying to remember clearly. She stopped suddenly and looked at the men. “I was taken to Marcus! He used the device on me and tried to extract the data. When it didn’t work he erased the memory of me being with him from my mind and that’s when Kitaro showed up.”

  “Yes,” Lucas agreed. “Apparently, when Marcus failed, Slater decided to turn you over to Kitaro. His job was either to get the information or kill you. But something happened and he never fulfilled those orders. That was what led to the rift between Slater and Kitaro and they have been bitter rivals ever since.”

  “It all makes sense,” she said more to herself than to them.

  “What does?” Konnor asked.

  “Kitaro.”

  “Well, how about explaining it to me?” he asked. “Because I don’t get this Kitaro-Shen thing at all.”

  “Shen?” Lucas asked. “Who’s Shen?”

  “That would be me.”

  Everyone jumped at the sound of the voice that came from the direction of the small sleeping quarters in the rear of the cabin. Shen stood in the doorway holding Minora by the arm. He nodded to Lucas and Konnor and released Minora. She ran across the room and bumped into the table. Senna jumped up to help her to a seat then turned.

  “Shen?” she asked.

  “Yes, it is I.”

  She frowned. “Why are you here?”

  “We must go to the control center.”

  “No,” Lucas argued.

  “Yes.” Shen looked at him. “And we must hurry. There have been unexpected developments.”

  Minora stood but Konnor remained seated. “Before we go anywhere I want to know the truth, Shen.”

  Shen’s eyes narrowed for a moment then he smiled. “Very well. Please, have a seat everyone. I’m sure you’ll all find this highly enlightening.”

  Senna remained standing and he walked over and took her arm. “Would you like to tell them or would you prefer I do it?”

  “I’ll tell them,” she hissed. “And let go of me.”

  His smile was one of amusement at her tone and demand but he did as she said. She turned and looked at the others. “You want to know about Shen? Okay, but first you have to know about Kitaro.”

  She looked at Konnor. “I told you about first meeting Kitaro. He took my clothes, chained me, and raped me. After that he left me alone for a long time, several days, in which time I had no food or water, nothing except my fear. The third day he returned. He asked me for the information and I told him I didn’t know anything. That’s when it really began. He beat me and abused me for weeks. Several times I really thought I would die. The days turned into nothing more than one type of abuse after another. It took him almost two months to realize that I really didn’t consciously know anything. That was two months of being raped and beaten, starved and terrorized with rats and snakes and being given to three and four men at a time while Kitaro watched. But when it finally sank in that I couldn’t tell him because I didn’t remember, things changed. That’s when he started using the drugs. Unfortunately, they didn’t work either. The only thing that accomplished was to turn me into an addict.”

  She gave Shen a hateful look. “But that suited Kitaro just fine. He used my addiction to torture me. He would give me the drugs sometimes and others he would make me go without. I would suffer all the withdrawal symptoms and when I was at my weakest he would pump me full of them again.”

  Senna closed her eyes and blew out her breath slowly, trying to release the hatred and rage that the memories inspired. “I reached a point that I was ready to die. I just couldn’t take it anymore. I begged him to kill me. He refused, but something did change. He took away the drugs. That was bad enough. It took me weeks to get them all out of my system and I was really sick. When I was finally clean he came up with a new game. He would bind me and rape me. But he had an audience now. It would be like a big party. People would be laughing and drinking and he would have me brought in. I was the entertainment. When he was feeling generous he would allow his guests to have a turn. Nothing was too perverse for his tastes.”

  Konnor stood up and tried to take her in his arms but she wouldn’t let him, despite the fact she was shaking like she had a high fever. “No, I have to get this out,” she said.

  He sat down and she cast Shen a glance. His face was a mask, as if his emotions were being held tightly in check. “One night, after one of his parties, he had me taken back to my cell. I lay on my pallet and cried for hours, trying to will my heart to stop beating. I guess I cried myself to sleep. Something woke me. There was someone with me. He was touching me, so gently, and whispering words of comfort to me. I looked at him and screamed. It was Kitaro. But he didn’t act like Kitaro. He didn’t shout at me or hurt me. He looked like Kitaro on the outside but inside he was Kitaro’s opposite. He said his name was Shen and that he had come to save me.

  “Over the next few months the abuse continued. Kitaro must have been receiving pressure from someone because he began again trying to get the information. Each time he failed he would fly into an awful rage and make me suffer more than ever. But each time it happened, Shen would appear in my cell to take care of me. It started to feel like he was an angel. When he was there with me I was safe and loved.

  “I don’t know what happened, but suddenly Kitaro stopped trying to get me to remember. And the parties stopped. For weeks I didn’t see Kitaro or Shen. Then Kitaro had me brought to his private quarters. He wanted me. By then I had lost the nerve to fight. I didn’t fight and it seemed to surprise him. The way he touched me was different. I thought he was Shen and I responded to him. I even called him Shen. When I did it was like waving a flag in front of a bull. He started beating me, demanding to know who Shen was. I told him the truth, that Shen was a man who came to me when I was alone who wore his face, that Shen was a man who loved me. Suddenly he just seemed to freeze in place. He looked like a statue made of flesh and blood. I thought for sure he was going to explode any moment and tear my head off or something, but he didn’t. Instead Kitaro disappeared and Shen emerged. He held out his hand and told me that we had to leave. I was too afraid and confused to argue. I did as he said and he took me to Japan. I stayed there, as his lover, until Kitaro emerged one day. He was dominant for two weeks then Shen took control. He told me that he had to send me away. Then he used the device he had taken from Marcus on me. I was taken to a private plane and flown to the States, then taken by car to Harlan’s house. When I arrived I didn’t know where I had been or what had happened.”

  Everyone looked at her in shock when she finished. Her
only concern was for Konnor and his reaction. “Konnor, you have to understand. The adversary you thought Shen was fighting all these years…it isn’t another person, it’s another part of Shen. Or more accurately I should say, Shen is a part of Kitaro. He’s a result of Kitaro’s mind fragmenting. Shen is Kitaro’s consciousness. He is, basically, the good side and Kitaro is the evil but they are, in the end, the same person.”

  Konnor looked at Shen. “Damn you.” His voice sounded strained. “Damn you to hell. You lied to me.”

  Shen’s face suddenly transformed from an expression of patience and compassion to one of arrogance and menace. “You pathetic fool,” he sneered at Konnor then included Lucas and Minora in his glance. “All of you, fools every one.”

  Senna jumped forward as he reached into the pocket of his coat. He grabbed her and wrapped one hand around her throat, holding her gasping for air as he lifted his weapon.

  “So, now at last you all know the truth,” he said, directing the comment to the others. “And now you can take it to your graves.”

  Konnor dived as Kitaro’s finger tightened on the trigger but he was too late. Lucas lurched backward in his chair as his chest exploded from the shot. Konnor had crossed the distance between him and Kitaro when Kitaro raised the gun and pointed it at Senna’s head. Konnor jerked to a stop.

  “Now, I believe we have somewhere to go,” Kitaro said. “After you.”

  “Lucas,” Senna gasped.

  Kitaro looked across the room to where Lucas was tied to the chair. His head was drooped forward so that his chin rested on his chest. Blood covered the front of his shirt. “He is dead.”

  A muffled sob came from Minora. “Move!” Kitaro barked. She walked over beside Konnor. He took her hand and after a moment’s hesitation walked ahead of Kitaro. Senna gulped air as the pressure on her throat eased and Kitaro shoved her behind Konnor. She bumped into Konnor and reached out to grab him for support.

  “Do not touch her!” Kitaro barked as Konnor started to take her arm. “She can walk on her own.”

  “Where are you taking us?” she rasped hoarsely.