Where You Are

by Alla Kar

  I nod. “I know. When I ask she says it’s complicated.”

  “It’s complicated so she puts Ex-Lax in his drink? Something’s fishy about that.”

  “Yep. But, don’t tell Savannah. I don’t want…I don’t want him getting mad at her when we’re not sure it’s anything.”

  Lucas pats my shoulder. “I would never do that, bro. Plus, you could easily whoop my ass.”

  I laugh. “At least you’re not in denial.”

  ***

  My place is nice. It’s on the east side of town in a nicer area. Lucas and I are bringing up the last boxes when his cell phone rings.

  “Hello. Yeah, we’ll be back in a bit. We’re almost done. Right. Love you, too.” He shoves his phone back in his pocket. “Savannah. She is so scared you’re going to be late to your own party.” He rolls his eyes.

  Tossing my last box onto my sectional, I glance over the room. Once I get everything settled in, it’ll look great.

  Lucas drops his last box with a huff. “I need a cigarette. Want one?”

  I shake my head. “I’m going to hit the loo really quick.” I walk through the house admiring the walls, the large rooms, and the den off my bedroom. I’m backing my way into the bathroom, taking in my bed and TV, when I trip over something. “Bloody fuck.”

  My legs are draped over a box and everything in it has spilled out around me. Groaning, I stand and look down. My blood runs cold. The box. Her box. I know it’s fucking pussy of me to have it, but I couldn’t get rid of it. Not her stuff.

  My once stable legs give out and I sit down on my knees, looking down at the cloth sticking out from the box. The red fabric makes my chest tighten and my dick go hard. God, I hate that it still affects me. But, how could it not?

  It was our first kiss. The first time I felt her tight, soft body against me. The first time I knew I would never let her go. I guess I didn’t do too good of a job. She left and she wouldn’t come back.

  My brain brings the memory to the surface, daring me to think back to that day. I have no choice but to fall into it.

  ***

  The red, low-cut shirt hugged her curves tightly. Even at seventeen she had a killer shape. Petite, short, and God, that ass. She was leaning over the water fountain, getting something the drink.

  I’d already taken her out the weekend before, but was too chicken shit to kiss her. I called myself a gentlemen, but that’s not the real reason. The real reason was that I was chicken shit.

  “Hey,” I leaned down and whispered into her ear.

  She turned around and glanced up at me over her glasses. The thick frames looked fucking sexy as hell against her thin nose, blond hair, and green eyes. I had never laid eyes on anything that fucking beautiful in my entire life. “Hey,” she said, moving the strap of her bag up her shoulder.

  “I wanted to let you know I had a wonderful night on Friday. It was…fun. I mean—” I trailed off, scratching the back of my neck, “I had a nice night.”

  Her cheeks turned a slight shade of pink and she smiled. “Me, too. It was a lot of fun.”

  Nodding, I gave her a small smirk. The bell chimed in the hallway, sending all our classmates scurrying toward their classrooms.

  She groaned and slid her glasses up her nose. “God, I don’t want to go to Math. I would rather drink the sweat from Johnny Frost’s socks.”

  I laughed. “That desperate, huh?”

  She nodded and bit her lower lip. Goddamm it, I wish I could do that for her. “Well, why don’t we skip class?”

  “Really?” she asked, not sure if she believed me or not.

  “Yep,” I shrugged one shoulder. “But we probably need to hurry before someone sees us.”

  “Where are we going to go?”

  I smiled down at her and offered her my hand. It fit so snugly into mine, her small fingers interlacing with my own. I led her toward the back chemistry lab. No one used it in the afternoons. I knew my chemistry teacher only had morning classes. I reached toward the lock and tugged on the handle.

  “It’s locked.” She frowned.

  I gave her hand a reassuring squeeze before I dropped down to my knees. Pulling a pick out of my pocket, I heard Laney laugh behind me.

  “Juvenile delinquent, are we?”

  I smiled and turned the pick until I heard the click. Scooting it open with my elbow, I gestured for her to go in. “I was a bit of a punk as a kid.”

  The room was dark, the windows shaded by blinds. Laney stayed close to me as we walked toward the shades and lifted them. Sun shone through the windows, brightening it up enough to see.

  Her chest fell in relief. She walked around the room slowly, trailing a finger over the counter. “You’re in chemistry, right?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, I kind of like it.”

  She laughed. “Right. Well, you’re the only person I know that does.”

  Nodding, I moved closer to her. “That’s what I hear. It just comes easy to me, I guess. Like English does to you.”

  She slid onto one of the chairs and pulled on a strand of her blond hair. “And how do you know that? Are you following me?”

  “Would you think it’s creepy if I said yes?”

  Her eyes twinkled and she leaned over the counter, her breasts begging to be gazed at. “I may think it’s charming. Like that accent of yours.”

  My dick hardened in my jeans, and I moved, trying to distract her from the bulge clearly growing in my pants.

  “You like that, luv?” I asked, my voice dropping an octave.

  A hint of pink returned to her cheeks. She blushed and it made me even harder. I’d made my way to the chair beside her and leaned against it. She twisted toward me, one elbow resting beside her on the counter. “I love that, luv,” she said, her voice dripping with a fake Australian accent.

  Goddamn. My entire body ached from her. I hadn’t even laid a hand on her yet and I felt like my bloody bones had melted. What a fucking pussy.

  “I’m glad. Is that what drew you to me?”

  A laugh escaped her throat. “Yes, because when you told me you could see my knickers that really made me swoon.”

  I belted out a laugh. “I could, luv. Well, the top of them at least. I thought it was hilarious. But my face took the punishment.”

  She giggled behind her hand. “I’m sorry. It just scared me. I didn’t know you—”

  I stopped her with a finger to her lips. “No need to apologize, luv. It was my mistake. I can be a dirty twit sometimes.”

  “Right,” she said, biting her bottom lip. “Because, you wouldn’t be as charming if you weren’t. I like your dirty twitty side.”

  I barked out a laugh. When I glanced up, she was staring at me through her laughter. My hormones were running wild, and if I looked at her tits again I was sure she’d slapped the shit out of me again. “Laney. I didn’t get a chance to do something on our date. I didn’t want to be pushy. But—” I trailed off. My mouth wouldn’t open and say what I wanted to say.

  She lifted an eyebrow and gestured for me to continue. Even though I could see the pink underneath her cheeks.

  Fuck. Standing up, I leaned against the counter in front of her. Her bent knees brushed against my thighs. “I want to kiss you, luv. Can I kiss you?”

  Her green eyes widened, and a slight gasp exhaled from her lips. She didn’t answer, but only moved her eyes toward my lips. I took that as compliance, and I gripped her jaw, steadying her mouth. “God, you have the sexiest mouth I’ve ever seen.”

  A slight smile curled from the corner of her lips. “Well, why don’t you taste them and see how much you like them.”

  Holy bloody fuck. I leaned closer, relieved it took some of the pressure off of my growing cock. “I can already tell you, luv, I’m going to love it.”

  She closed the gap, resting her full, pink lips against my own. Her breath swarmed me, wrapping her scent into my bones. Christ. I couldn’t resist. Grabbing her jaw, I opened her mouth with my finger, letting my tongue into her mou
th. She moaned, and it set me on edge. Her small fingers reached out and gripped my shirt, pulling me closer. Her back arched when I pushed between her legs, wrapping my arms around her waist.

  She sucked my tongue with her mouth. Gripping her waist, I turned her around and placed her on the table. This was not first kiss appropriate. I pushed the bullshit away and devoured her mouth with my own. The scent of lavender filled my nose as I tangled my fingers in her long, blond hair.

  My dick was aching for release. I was going to have one great jack off when I got home. Forcing myself, I pulled away from her mouth, resting my forehead against hers. Her cheeks were flushed, her hands still interlaced with my hair.

  Her soft breath was gentle on my face, only making me want to take her places she would never come down from. “God,” she whispered. “That’s the best first kiss I’ve ever had.”

  Biting back a grin, I cocked an eyebrow. “I’m glad to say I agree. Maybe you should take me out to dinner first, next time.” She rolled her eyes, biting her bottom lip. “No, luv. I wouldn’t do that if I were you. It makes me want to do it myself.”

  “I don’t suggest that.”

  Spinning on my heel, I glanced over at my chemistry teacher. He had one hand on the doorknob, the other shoved down in his lab coat.

  Laney’s face turned pale. She grabbed her bag and held it to her chest. Shit. I gave him a small smile. “Hi, Mr. James. It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?”

  He lifted an eyebrow and I swear I saw him holding back a smile. “It is. Better for some, I see.” He gestured toward Laney and rolled his eyes. “Get your asses back to class, now.”

  He winked and left the room.

  Laney’s laugh echoed over the lab. She slid off the stool. “Ouch,” she said, grabbing at the back of her shirt.

  “Hold on, luv. Let me look.” The back of her red shirt had snagged on a piece of broken countertop. It ripped, showing her milky, smooth skin. “It’s torn.”

  She sighed. “Damn. I don’t have another shirt.”

  My eyes glanced over her lower back. Grabbing her shirt, I ripped until I had a piece of red shirt in my hands.

  “What the hell, Lachlan? That made it worse.”

  I smiled and fisted my shirt, bringing it over my head. Her eyes traveled down my white undershirt to the top of my jeans. “Here, luv. Put this on.”

  She watched me as she slid it on. I tucked the piece of her shirt in my jeans pocket. A small smile rose from the corner of her lips. “May I ask why you’re keeping that?”

  “Trophy. I finally got to kiss you. I have to remember it, luv.”

  The red fluttered back to her cheeks and she tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “Well, do I look okay?”

  My shirt swallowed her small body and it was the sexiest thing I’ve ever laid my eyes on. “You look bloody adorable.”

  She barked out a laugh and grabbed her bag. “Hardly. But thanks for trying.”

  Smiling down at her, I ran my hand down her cheek. She watched my lips, my eyes, my chest rise and fall. I wanted her. More than wanted her. I needed her. All of her. She smiled, like she knew what she was doing to me.

  “One more kiss?” she whispered.

  One? I wanted thousands. Forever. All over her. Nodding, I bent my head and pressed my lips against hers. It felt even better than the time before.

  A loud pounding on the door broke us apart. “Out,” Mr. James yelled from the other side of the door.

  We both laughed and scurried out the door.

  ***

  “Dude, did you fall in the damn toilet?”

  I snapped back into the present. My eyes glanced over the box in front of me. Our first condom wrapper, our first movie ticket, even the bloody blanket from our first time shoved down into the box.

  I stagger to my feet, my hand clenched around the torn shirt. Lucas rounds the corner and his eyes go wide. “What the…”

  The burn in my chest thumps harder, not satisfied with the grief it’s caused me. “I…I tripped over the bloody box.” My voice is rising and I can hear it but I can’t stop it. “It’s full of her shit…fuck.” I scream, slamming my fist against the bathroom wall.

  Lucas sighs, then pats my shoulder. “Lachlan, I’m sorry, bro. I don’t know what to say. She’s broken. She’s hurting. You’re the only one that can help her. Help her get over it. Make her talk.”

  Aggravated, I stand completely up and rub my eyes with my fists. “I’m going to get ready. I’ll be out in a bit.”

  Lucas opens his mouth, but slams it shut. He knows my bloody heart is breaking. She doesn’t know it, but I’m finished with the bullshit. She’s going to talk to me. And wherever she is, is where I’ll be.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Laney

  “It’s not a cry you can hear at night,

  It’s not somebody that’s seen the light,

  It’s a cold and a broken hallelujah” – Rufus Wainwright

  To: laneyboo32@gmail.com

  From: lucasbadass17@gmail.com

  Subject: PARTAYYY!!!

  Hello Party People!

  There is a party at my house tonight. If you don’t know the address text me. We’re celebrating Lachlan Hems’ win at the Cook Off. He’s moving back, people. Let’s welcome him back to Jacksonville with love!

  Drinks are welcomed.

  See you at nine!

  Thanks,

  Lucas

  My finger hovers over the delete button. I don’t need to go to this. I don’t even know why Lucas thought to send it to me. Sighing, I close out of my email and throw my hands over my face. This has been the biggest bunch of shit I’ve ever been a part of.

  My phone chimes and I pull it out.

  Aiden: Can I come over?

  My gut wrenches. He’s been texting me all day. I’m supposed to break up with him and I know I need to go ahead and do it. He’ll live and will never know that I was playing him the entire time.

  Me: Give me ten minutes.

  Aiden: Be there in eleven.

  Shoving my phone into my jeans pocket, I stand and straighten up my room. Heather is gone with Todd to some away football game. I’m not telling Bethany anything. My camera necklace is locked in my desk drawer and not coming out for this. No one deserves anyone to see that look on their face. The face of your heart-breaking, of someone stomping all over it.

  Eleven minutes later, a knock thumps on my door. My hands are sweating and my heart is jackhammering in my chest.

  It’s now or never, Laney. I swing the door open and Aiden is staring down at me, a gorgeous smile on his lips. “Can I come in?”

  Nodding, I open the door wider, allowing him to brush by me. His eyes search over the room, taking in everything. “You’ve really made the place your own. Why haven’t I been in here before?” He touches my desk, runs his fingers along my bed.

  “I guess we’ve always gone to your place,” I say, lamely, closing the door behind me. “So, what’s up?”

  Aiden’s attention darts back to me. “You left yesterday. Savannah said…” he trails off. Fuck, she told.

  “Aiden listen—”

  “No, let me finish. She said she saw you crying. Are you okay? Do you need to talk to me about something?” He steps forward, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me close. “I’m here for you, baby. As long as you’ll have me. I’ve never met a girl that has been so distant. It’s been weeks and I haven’t slept with you.” I widen my eyes. “I’m not pressuring you. I’m saying that I’ve never stayed this long without sex. And…it’s nice. Ya know, it’s nice.”

  God. She didn’t tell? I was almost hoping she had. It would have saved me the torture.

  My throat is on fire. I need to tell. I have to tell him. “Aiden,” I chock out. “Look, I really need to tell you something—”

  He presses his lips to mine, silencing my plea. Christ. He grips my hair and gently pulls, making my stomach flip. “I just want you to know we don’t have to talk about it now.
I actually have to run into town. Maybe you’re up for going out tonight?” He pushes his blond hair from his big, brown eyes.

  I nod. “Sure, what time?”

  “Nine. I’ll pick you up then. I just…I want to spend some alone time with you. I want to get to know you better.”

  My chest swells, and the guilt fills my lungs. I let him kiss me, and watch him walk out of my room.

  Tonight. I have to tell him tonight. Just do it. Dropping to the floor, I curl my knees against my chest. I deserve a pity moment, or two.

  ***

  “I thought we were going out?” I screech.

  Aiden swerves into Lucas’s apartment complex. No. No. No! Not here! Please! “We are. I thought we could go relax. Have fun, make out in someone’s bedroom, drink…just have a good time.”

  My hands are clenched into fists on my thighs. Anywhere but here. “Aiden, I don’t know if I want to come here. I mean…I did kind of ruin Savannah’s wedding twice. Maybe we could go down to The Loft. How about that?”

  Aiden frowns, reaches over, and squeezes my hand. “I got an invite today from Lucas. I’m supporting my cousin and her friends. Even if the Australian asshole is going to be here.” He scoffs. “Can we go in for a bit and then we can leave? I swear Savannah isn’t mad at you, baby. She adores you.”

  Yeah the fuck right. I was basically caught with Lachlan. I’ve cheated on her cousin, well, she thinks that. “Aiden—”

  “Please, just for a little bit. We’ll leave if you feel uncomfortable.”

  A sigh escapes my throat, but I mask it as a cough. “For just a little bit, Aiden. You swear? As soon as I’m uncomfortable, we leave?”

  Kissing my cheek, he reaches over and opens my door for me. My legs are shaky when I step out of the Beemer. The cool air slides against my skin, popping goose bumps along my arm.

  Aiden’s arm snakes around my waist, and he pulls me into his side. “Ready?”

  Aiden helps me up the steps in my heels. I shouldn’t have worn them. I’m probably going to be running out of the party, like always, in ten minutes. But, on the other hand, I may need them for a weapon. If I break up with Aiden sooner rather than later, I may have to fight him off.