The Best Of LK Vol. 1

by LK Collins

  “We will, man, when the time’s right.”

  “This is such a huge decision. How can you be so sure?” Conner asks him.

  “I don’t have a choice. My dad died fighting for our country. I have to follow in his footsteps. I have to honor his name. This is all he ever wanted me to do.”

  “Don’t you feel bad that you told Cam you weren’t gonna join?”

  “I do, and I don’t want to hurt her, but deep down, I know this is my destiny. It doesn’t feel right to ignore it anymore. She knows I really considered college…but I just can’t. But enough about me, you gotta fucking stop swaying back and forth and make up your mind, bro.”

  “I will, but I need a little more time to wrap my head around everything, to make sure that this is really what I want...”

  I confronted them right away, and they both confirmed they were joining the Navy. It was like Conner had suddenly made up his mind and Nixon seemed to act like I should know he was doing this.

  Over the last year, since his father had been killed by enemy fire in the Navy, it seemed like Nixon had been pushing me away. I had assumed that it was simply his grief weighing on him, but as I look back, I can see that he was also disconnecting from me, preparing for what he felt like he had to do to honor his father’s memory.

  But, it didn’t matter what I said to him or Conner; there was no talking them out of it. They’d already gone behind my back, my brother and the first guy I’d ever loved. The only people I had in this world had signed their lives away without even talking to me about it first. I would’ve never done anything like that to them. It crushed everyone that cared for them. The future Nixon and I had talked about was now on hold as he was going to risk his life and possibly not come home. The feeling so unsettling, I still have anxiety to this day.

  And a week later, to the day…it was time for both to go. I didn’t think they’d actually leave, and certainly not so soon. But they did, their patriotism suddenly taking priority over the bonds we shared. And no matter how hard I tried to talk them out of it, I couldn’t. They’d already committed and made up their minds.

  Which is even crazier, because Nixon swore to me he’d never join after his dad died and Conner never talked about wanting to.

  To this day, Conner swears leaving was one hundred percent his choice, and maybe it was, but deep down, I know Nixon influenced him. I heard what I heard and saw the way Conner looked up to him. He was his role model. Up until then, Conner always had dreams to sail the world like our parents, not save the world and become a Navy SEAL.

  The worst part of all, as we said goodbye, Nixon broke up with me. He said he wanted me to follow my dreams, like he was, but that was the last thing I wanted. He didn’t want me waiting around. He wanted me to go on and live my life, but how could I when he’d become my life. I begged him to not end things, but he said it was for my own good. That he didn’t want me to end up alone like his mom. And as he let me go, I felt my insides dying, and to him, it seemed like it was no big fucking deal.

  It felt like losing him then, or whether I’d lost him later in some tragic military incident, it was all the same. It took me years to let go of him, and the goddamn minute that I think I can actually move on and have something real with someone as good as Luke, here he fucking is, back in my life, not caring one bit about what he did to me, or about what I went through. Not apologizing about what he did to me back then or is doing to me now.

  “You ever piloted before?” Luke asks Nixon over the radio as we are out on our second test run of the day.

  “No, I was part of a team that did tactical missions. Leaving the ship and going in on land, doing raids and searches.” Jesus, I’m already sick of how much Luke and Guy are sucking up to him. It’s Conner 2.0.

  “Why’d you leave?”

  “I got into it with my Captain and kicked the shit out of him. But I needed a change anyway.”

  I huff into the radio, knowing that’s a lie. He didn’t want a change. I’m sure of it. This can’t make him happy in the slightest. Clearly he always wanted to be a SEAL, even if he lied to me about joining, it all came out in the end.

  It’s not that I’m even mad at him anymore; I’ve let go of the past and moved on from all his shit. It was so long ago. I’ve done well for myself. I’m independent and happy and will never, ever depend on anyone again in my life. At least not the way I did him and my brother.

  Looking over at him as he sits back and looks out his window, I wonder, why come back here? I mean, this area is where he is from, but why the Coast Guard?

  “Hey, Cam, your brother’s a SEAL, right?” Guy asks me.

  “Uh-huh.”

  “That’s cool,” Nixon responds, clearly not wanting the guys to know about our past, same as me.

  “We’ll be approaching the site in ninety seconds,” Luke says.

  “Ten-four,” I respond and unstrap my harness as Nixon does the same.

  “Are you sure you’re ready to do this?” I ask him sarcastically.

  “Hell yeah, I am.”

  I hook the repelling line to his harness and open the door to the helicopter. His eyes are on me, all over me. Taking a round life raft, I toss it out of the aircraft, watching it spill down to the ocean. “That’s your mark,” I tell him. “You have sixty seconds to bring it back up.”

  “You’re clear to descend,” Guy says.

  “Ready?”

  He nods once and gets in position, and I don’t hesitate pushing the button that lowers him to the water. Looking down, it is a calm day. Squinting my eyes, I calculate how close he is to the ocean. He waves his arm signaling me to stop, but I can’t. Holding the button down all the way, it slams him into the Atlantic.

  “What the fuck, Cam?” Luke hollers at me, looking down at Nixon soaking wet in the water.

  “Sorry, my finger slipped.”

  “Your finger has never slipped, Cameron,” Guy scolds me.

  “What, you think I did that on purpose? I don’t usually run this thing; it seems a bit jerky.” Guy and Luke look at each other and I ask them, “What?”

  “You okay? You’ve seemed a little off today.”

  “No, I haven’t,” I argue back. “I’m fine.”

  “Whatever, bring him back up,” Guy says. Nixon is holding on to the life ring, and as I press the button to pull him back up, Luke asks me, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “Yeah, why would you think I’m not?”

  “You don’t seem like yourself.”

  “I’m a little out of my element without Seth here. Things are harder than I thought they’d be.”

  “Who’s Seth?” Nixon asks me.

  I forgot all about Nixon for a moment and as I look out the helicopter, he’s at the door. “He’s the guy who used to work with us.”

  “What, did you date him?” Nixon asks me, like he has a right to know and Luke winks at me, reminding me of the other night and what’s important—it’s not Nixon. I smile, remembering the way Luke’s lips felt on mine.

  “No, we just worked together for a long time.”

  “That’s cool,” Nixon responds, and I notice his jaw is clenched.

  “You dating anyone now?” he asks me, and I ignore him, not wanting to talk about my personal life. Plus, I don’t know what Luke and I are, if anything, and we didn’t tell Guy. Not that it’s a secret, but for now…it seems to be for the best. Nixon has no right to ask me anything. He lost that right when he left me, turning his back on me and taking away the future we were meant to have. He had no right to make those choices for me, regardless of his reasons. I deserved a say in it all.

  4

  Nixon

  “You coming out with us, brother?” Guy asks me.

  I look at Cameron and can see how bothered she is by me. “Nah, I’m good. I’ve got other plans.”

  “Come on,” Luke says, “Just one drink, man. You kicked ass in training today—let’s celebrate.”

  Cameron puts her shoes on and I blink
a few times contemplating what to do. “Come on, Cameron, tell him you want him to come.”

  “He’s a grown man,” she tells Luke. “Let him make his own damn decisions. He seems pretty capable to me.”

  Damn, what a jab. Did I really hurt her that bad? I mean, we were so young and I never told her I loved her or anything. She can’t still be holding on to the shit from the past…can she? I mean, I did it for her own good. I saw what losing my dad did to my mom, I couldn’t ask her to put her life on hold for me, in hopes I’d return and not be fucked up. “Where are you guys going?” I ask, considering one drink, just to get under her skin a little bit more.

  They both look at Cameron, like she’s their fuckin’ boss, and she shrugs her shoulders, “I don’t care.”

  “There’s a bar called Willy’s Oceanside,” Guy tells me.

  I’ve been there before, so I’m familiar with where it’s at. “You headed there now?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Cool, I’ll swing by and knock a few down with you guys.”

  Cameron sighs like the news of me joining is going to kill her. It’s the same sound she’s been giving me all goddamn day. Maybe she doesn’t want to be around me because she still can’t let me go, which is no way to live, in my opinion. But it’s not my fucking life…it’s hers. Reaching down, I grab my bag from the bench next to her and whisper in her ear, “Were you really that hung up on my dick?”

  “Fuck you,” she mutters back, and I turn around, loving how easily I can get to her. I’ve always been able to push her buttons and clearly still can. It’s one of the reasons I finally crossed the line with her. We’d always banter back and forth, most of which would turn into wrestling, until one night when it led to more. The second I was inside her tight pussy, it was as if she’d cast a fuckin’ spell over me. Nothing else mattered for the better part of the next year, except her. All I wanted to do was be around her, to be inside her. She consumed me, but it couldn’t stop fate from knocking at my door.

  Saying goodbye to Luke and Guy, I leave and go straight to the bar. I really don’t have anything else to do tonight. I could text back any of the chicks that are blowing up my phone, but I’d rather get a jumpstart on drinking and find someone new to bang.

  Sitting on the rooftop deck at Willy’s Oceanside, I can see the Atlantic from my seat.

  “Here you go, Nixon,” the sexy blonde waitress says, setting down a pitcher of beer and two shots. I knock one back, noticing that she’s still standing there watching me. As I set the glass down, I look up at her and she says, “You don’t remember me, do you?”

  The feeling of mortification no longer exists, as this happens more often than not. First step, I look for a nametag, which is not there. But she has a nice rack.

  “Of course, I remember you,” I lie to her, knowing she’ll give in and tell me all about what we did, now that I’ve claimed to remember her.

  “You do?”

  “Yeah, absolutely.”

  “Then why didn’t you text me back?”

  “I had to get a new phone, dropped my other one on the job.” I shake my phone in front of her and she smiles at me.

  “So you started?” she asks me, and the fuzzy recollection starts to come back…I was drunk and rambling about my Coast Guard training.

  “Yeah, I’m actually meeting my crew here tonight.”

  “Nixon!” Luke shouts, walking up the stairs with Cameron and Guy behind him.

  “What’s up, brother?” I shake his hand and do the same to Guy, then awkwardly give Cameron a hug. Damn, she smells the same—that fucking smell of coconut and the ocean always got my cock excited.

  “I was just gonna order for you guys,” I tell them and the waitress says, “Hi, I’m Lucy. What can I get you all to drink?” Lucy, fuck, how could I forget her name was Lucy?

  “We’ll take a pitcher also. Stella’s good and four shots of tequila please,” Guy orders for them and passes her his card.

  “Keep em’ coming,” I tell Lucy, happy to take advantage of Guy’s card. I knock my other shot back since there is a third on its way. As she walks off, we all three stare at her, and Cameron clears her throat pulling us back to reality.

  “So, you guys come here often, or what?” I ask them, quickly recovering.

  “Sometimes,” Guys says, and I notice that Cameron is resting her head on her hand, looking out at the water. The guys don’t seem to notice her disconnect, so I ignore it too.

  “We go out occasionally, when we don’t have to work the next day,” Luke says. “But it really depends where we feel like going. There are so many cool spots here.”

  “Really? How do you not get sick and tired of each other?”

  They look back and forth, and Cameron sighs…again. Lucy sets the shots, pitcher, and a stack of cups down. I can barely hear Cameron ordering something else from her. “To Nixon!” Luke exclaims, and Guy responds, “Here, here!” I slam my shot on the table and watch Cameron as she swallows hers without even raising her glass, then ask her, “Could I holler at you, alone, real quick?” I’m done with her bullshit.

  She shakes her head and goes back to staring out at the water. Lucy passes her whatever concoction she ordered and Guy asks her, “Cam, what’s going on?”

  “Nothing, I told you guys, I miss Seth. That’s all.” Luke pulls her against his chest and she hugs him closely. Seeing his hands on her lights a fire inside me. She’s not mine, I’m not fucking stupid, but I still don’t like the thought of anyone else touching her. She looks up at him and then closes her eyes, like he has some fucking power over her. Holy shit…she likes him.

  “Is that really all?” I ask her point blank, tired of her stupid games and hoping it’ll get her out of his arms.

  She ignores me and I flick her arm, forcing her to turn and look at me. “Don’t fucking touch me!” she snarls, overreacting to a little flick. I can sense the guys are shocked by her reaction, not sure what to do.

  “Is that really all?” I ask her again and finally Luke lets her go.

  “Just let her be, man,” Luke says, sticking up for her, and I sit back in my chair downing my beer, wishing she’d stop being such a bitch.

  “So sorry,” I respond with a sarcastic tone as an awkward void fills the air. I should tell them about us, but I sense it could complicate things even more, and possibly make the guys not like me. I need them on my side if I want this assignment to work out. And I really do— being in the air today was awesome. I loved it, and I can’t lie…I need the money.

  “I didn’t mean to touch you,” I tell her, as she still ignores me. “I only wanted to know what I did to upset you.” I can see the back of her head shake a little. She doesn’t want to discuss things or tell the guys about us.

  “You two good?” Luke asks us, as Guy is on his phone.

  “I am, if you are?” She nods and sets her empty drink down. Guy passes her his phone and says, “It’s Seth.”

  She smiles more than I’ve seen from her as she brings it to her ear and walks away to the railing to talk to him.

  “So they were really that close?” I ask.

  “Oh, yeah, and you’ll get there with her too. Give it a little time and go easy on her. She’s been through a lot in her life.”

  “Yeah? Like what?” I ask, curious as to what she’s told them.

  “Her parents left her when she was seventeen to sail around the world and right after, her brother joined the Navy. He was her best friend and has only been home twice since he left,” Guy says.

  “Damn, that sucks.”

  “Yeah, so we’re all she’s got. Go easy on her, would ya?”

  “Sure thing.” I finish my beer and refill my glass from the pitcher, not able to help myself from staring at Cameron’s ass. Damn, she was hot back then, but she’s at a new fuckin’ level now!

  “So what’s your story, man?” Luke asks me. I told them a little earlier how I was a Navy SEAL, but I didn’t elaborate as I sensed Cameron tense the moment I b
rought it up.

  “Not much of a story. I’m laidback. I’m a work hard, play hard kinda guy. I’m addicted to surfing and women…really, that’s it. I’m pretty close with my family. They all live inland a bit.”

  “No steady woman in your life?” Luke asks.

  “Nah, but I did hit our waitress the other night,” I say with a grin. “You?”

  He shakes his head and they both chuckle as Guy says, “I have a girlfriend, Macey, been together for about a year now.”

  “She doesn’t mind you working with a girl and going out with her on your free nights?”

  “Nah, the girls are tight. Macey is a nurse so she works the night shift. Doesn’t leave much for me at home most evenings when I’m off.”

  Luke’s phone buzzes and he glances at it, then he says, “Hey, man, you ever been skydiving?”

  “Fuck yeah! Why?”

  “Tomorrow’s my birthday and we booked this big skydiving trip a while back. I totally forgot to tell them that Seth wasn’t coming now that he’s gone. Do you want to take his spot?”

  “You sure, bro? Cameron wouldn’t mind?”

  “No way, she’ll be fine with it.”

  “Fine with what?” she asks passing Guy back his cell phone.

  “I invited Nixon to jump with us tomorrow.”

  “Cool,” she responds, like it’s no big deal and waves Lucy back over. How did she go from not being able to stand me, to accepting the fact that I’m coming with them tomorrow? I mean, not that I’m complaining. I was getting pretty exhausted of her bitchy attitude. If she’s gonna be cool, then so am I.

  Lucy walks off, my eyes all over her ass, and she glances back at me, nodding that I follow her. “You guys excuse me real quick?” I ask.

  “Sure,” the guys respond and Cameron looks like she could be sick as I follow Lucy, smacking her ass and rushing her into the bathroom. She licks her lips and I make sure that I don’t forget her name, ‘cause I’m not only taking her home tonight, but I’m gonna snag a quick blow job before we go.