Passions of a Gentleman (Gentlemen of Honor Book 3)

by Rose Gordon

  “I hated him so very much for what he’d done to me, and you and Giles, that before the grass had grown over his grave, I married your father.” Her lower lip trembled, and she looked up at Simon, tears sparkling in her eyes. “I am so sorry, Simon.”

  “Sorry?”

  “I should have told you,” she burst out with another round of tears. “I should have told you about Giles, but I was still grieving. I should have told you about your father and me, but I was too embarrassed. What must you think of me, an adulteress? I-I-I loved your father all along and I couldn’t imagine having another of his children be claimed as Lord Norcourt’s. But in my selfishness, I stole away what might have been yours.”

  “A title that I had no right to?” Simon asked flatly.

  She nodded. “I-I… One day you’ll have children and understand how hard it is to pick one over another,” she explained weakly. “It was the very least I could ensure to Giles for all that he’s suffered.”

  “And rightfully so,” Simon agreed. Heedless to the fact he was clad in only a pair of dove trousers, he walked over to his mother and wrapped her in a tight hug. “I love you, Mother. I truly do and I understand.” He pulled back. “I’m glad you married Father.” Simon couldn’t have imagined what his life would have been like had he not had Father.

  “You’re not angry with me?” The surprise in her voice made him chuckle.

  “No.”

  “Not even about not telling you about Giles sooner?”

  Simon momentarily stiffened. “At first, I was,” he admitted. “But not…” He shrugged.

  “Now?”

  Simon released his mother and resumed his earlier seat. “It’s not Giles that I didn’t like. I just didn’t like that I hadn’t been told. He just turned up and suddenly the two of you couldn’t seem to remember how to breathe if he wasn’t around.”

  Mother cocked her head to the side. She’d always been perceptive when it came to Simon—save these past few months when she’d become obsessed with rekindling her motherly bond with Giles. “Something’s different,” she mused. “Just a month ago, you nearly brought down my lending library about my ears at seeing Giles and Lucy’s wedding announcement in the newspaper.”

  Simon scowled. “I did not.”

  “Yes, you did,” Mother said with a little laugh. “Every time we’ve ever mentioned Giles, you’ve acted like you were sitting on a nail. Why, the time we had him, Lucy, and Seth over for dinner…” She narrowed her eyes on him. “What’s going on?”

  “Nothing.”

  “I don’t believe you,” Mother said without hesitation. “Something is going on, and I won’t rest until I know what it is.”

  An image of Rae in his bed, her face resting against his pillow flashed into his mind.

  “Your grin only confirms it,” Mother said with a snap of her fingers. Her eyes held that familiar excited, mischievous light they’d always had during his boyhood. A spark that had been extinguished for a brief few months. He was glad to have it back. Perhaps her worry over not telling Simon about Giles had been harder for her than Simon had realized.

  Remorse of his unkind thoughts toward her filled his heart.

  “I’m sorry, Mother,” Simon said thickly.

  Mother blew out a deep breath. “I suppose I can forgive you for your beastly behavior as of late, but—” she exhaled again— “only if you’ll tell me what has you smiling like a cat who’s spotted the cream.”

  “A certain young lady,” Simon said with another grin.

  Mother’s eyes tripled in size. “Who? It’s not Lady Eugenia, is it?” Before Simon could answer, his mother waved her hand through the air. “Of course it’s not that wretched young lady. Is it Lady Sophia?”

  He shook his head.

  “Good. I don’t like her mother.” Mother jumped off her seat and started pacing. “Miss Camille Essex?”

  Simon shook his head again. Mother would never guess.

  “Even better, her father is a gambler of the worst sort. He’s always borrowing money from his eldest daughter’s husband.” She tapped a finger against her cheek. “Lady Elizabeth James?”

  “You’ll never guess.”

  “Clearly not,” Mother agreed, coming to a halt in front of Simon. “All right, who is she?”

  “Henrietta—”

  “Hughes,” Mother finished for him.

  “Appleton,” Simon corrected.

  “Pardon?” Mother and Father said in unison.

  “Her father’s name is Hughes; she’s taken on her husband’s surname: Appleton.”

  “That’s where you’ve been?” Mother burst out, her voice on the edge of hysteria.

  Simon stiffened. “Is there a problem with who I chose to be my wife?” he asked, not bothering to mask his irritation. Because, if there was a problem, they’d be gone today. Never to return again.

  “No,” Mother said quickly. “I don’t know Miss Hu—er…the newest Mrs. Appleton, but I’m sure she’s lovely.” Mother slowly lowered herself back into her chair.

  “Then what is the problem?” Again, he made no strides to hide his feelings.

  “Why did you marry her?” Mother asked.

  “Why does it matter?” Simon countered.

  “Because you’d never shown an inclination of interest toward her before and now you’ve gone from courting Isabelle to vying for Lucy’s attentions, and now you’ve just married Mis—Mrs. Apple—Henrietta in a span of six weeks.”

  Simon bridled at her remark. There was so much she didn’t know.

  “Son, your Mother and I want what is best for you—and your young lady.” He scratched his temple the way Simon had seen him do many times when he was searching for the right words. “I know you feel betrayed, Simon, but I wish you’d have waited a little longer before you involved that innocent young lady in this.”

  “Perhaps the two of you should have given a little more thought to how you handled telling me about Giles’ existence,” Simon fired back. It wasn’t a fair or even a related remark, but they needed to consider their own actions before criticizing his.

  “And that’s the problem,” Father said grimly.

  “You’re using her to ease your pain,” Mother said bluntly. “And that’s unacceptable, Simon.”

  “Using her?” Clearly these two didn’t understand. “I don’t give a hang about Giles.”

  “No, because you’ve replaced your hurt and disdain with a young woman who doesn’t know she’s been made into a pawn,” Father blustered.

  Father and Mother were wrong and in time he’d prove it to them, for now they were being too irrational to try to reason with. Instead, Simon stood and quietly left the room.

  Rae’s heart hadn’t stopped thundering in her chest since she’d gone looking for Simon and instead of finding him, had overheard his parents accuse him of using her to bury his feelings about Giles.

  Were they right? She wondered and she carefully crept back up the stairs and back to Simon’s bedchamber. They knew him best. She knew of the pain Giles’ sudden arrival had inadvertently inflicted on Simon. Was she just too naïve to believe he loved her more than that?

  Did it matter?

  Yes…and no. It mattered to her, but it didn’t matter enough to risk losing Simon by mirroring his parents’ accusations.

  The doorknob turned, sending a chill over her. Rae squeezed her eyelids closed and hoped Simon would find her actions more convincing than she feared they were.

  Next to her, the mattress dipped as Simon settled next to her. “Rae?”

  “Hmm,” she forced, not opening her eyes.

  Simon kissed her on the top of her nose. “I have some tragic news.”

  Rae’s eyes shot open, her heart slamming harder in her chest—if such a thing were even possible. “What’s wrong?”

  “My parents are home.”

  Rae’s fingers itched to trace the hard edge of his clenched jaw or even to whisper encouragement about his announcement. But she couldn’
t bring herself to do either. “Do we need to leave?”

  Simon shook his head. “Only if you’re not comfortable and you wish to.”

  “What about you?” she challenged.

  Simon forced his left shoulder up in a stiff shrug. “We ran off to Scotland and got married, Rae. No matter how you meet them for the first time it’ll be awkward. No sense in going downstairs and making that happen just now.”

  “So then will we get the honor of choking down an uncomfortable breakfast with them or slither out the window and scale the wall under the moonlight?”

  Simon let out a sharp bark of laughter. “This is why I love you.” He kissed her lips. “Whichever you’d prefer.”

  She’d prefer if Simon had taken her downstairs earlier when he went to go speak to his parents and would have introduced her then as his bride—the one he loved more than any and all others. But that hadn’t happened. She closed her eyes. She needed to release these bitter feelings or her life would be miserable.

  Simon had always been compassionate toward her. He’d never said anything unkind to or about her. She’d do well to remember that even if his intentions had been self-serving, she hadn’t been physically hurt or demeaned because of them.

  She met his gaze. “I should like to meet them.”

  “Now?” Simon’s eyebrows shot to his hairline.

  Recollecting that she’d removed her clothes when she’d returned from downstairs so not to give herself away, she shook her head wildly. “Tomorrow.”

  She sat up abruptly, suddenly aware that if his parents were downstairs, they likely assumed she and Simon were… “Perhaps we should go make introductions now.”

  “That’s not necessary,” Simon assured her.

  Ignoring him, Rae pulled the counterpane off and scooted out of bed. “Yes, it is. I need to go meet them before they think I’m a lightskirt,” she said, frantically picking up her discarded clothing from the floor.

  Simon’s large hands covered hers, stilling her. “You’ll just have to believe me when I say this, but my mother would be the last person to accuse another of being a lightskirt.”

  Rae stared at him in disbelief, but he didn’t elaborate. “Please, Simon, I think my being up here was already a bad start to a relationship with your parents, but if we wait until morning, I don’t think I’ll be able to look at them.”

  “Rae, I promise you, you have nothing to worry about on that score.”

  “On that score?” She pulled her dress up to cover her chest. “And on another?”

  Simon’s brow furrowed. “Rae, you’re worrying about nothing. They already know we’re married. If we weren’t up here enjoying one another they’d probably be more concerned.”

  That wasn’t exactly what Rae had wanted to hear him say. For some reason, she might have felt a little better about his parents’ accusations had he openly confessed them to her. His not telling her made them seem that much more true—as if he were hiding it from her.

  “If you insist,” she choked, dropping her clothes. Reluctantly, she crawled back up into his bed, finding it harder by the moment to want to be there with him. She blinked back the tears stinging the back of her eyes. She must accept this and forget about it. Her life would be miserable if she didn’t.

  Simon’s hand skimmed its way up her bare arm and to her shoulder. He pushed her hair out of the way and pressed his lips to her shoulder. The act would have been her undoing only an hour ago. Now, she felt cheap and used. She gritted her teeth, another round of hot tears burning her eyes.

  Seemingly oblivious to her feelings, Simon’s lips traveled across to the top of her back and to her neck.

  Simon was frustrated.

  First his parents had voiced something so asinine he couldn’t believe it was them talking, and now Rae was as responsive as an asparagus spear. Who would have known meeting his parents would have meant so much to her? He’d haul her down there this very minute if he didn't think his parents might say something that would cut her to the quick.

  Tomorrow, he promised himself, giving her one final kiss before rolling onto his back and staring up at the ceiling. It was shaping up to be a long, uncomfortable night.

  28

  Rae had hoped by morning her heart would have healed a little.

  It hadn’t.

  Pasting a smile she didn’t feel on her lips, she allowed Simon to help her dress. She had to admit, after having to help her dress and undress for a fortnight, he’d become a very skilled lady's maid.

  After he finished cinching and tying her, she took a seat on the chair next to his secretary and waited while he dressed.

  “Is something bothering you?” he asked, jabbing his stickpin into the perfect knot on his cravat.

  “No. Of course not.” She stretched her lips even further apart.

  Simon didn’t look convinced. “Are you nervous?” His green eyes were soft and full of compassion.

  “About meeting your mother?” She shook her head. She’d been introduced to Mrs. Appleton sometime last Season, though she doubted the older woman remembered much of their encounter. Nor did it matter. Whether the Appletons liked it or not, or liked her or not, she was Simon’s wife and that wouldn’t be changing any time soon, so there wasn’t any reason for them all not to get along.

  “What about my father?” Simon asked with a crooked smile. “I’ve heard he makes certain lords quake in their boots.”

  Rae shrugged. “If he doesn’t like me, it wouldn’t be the worst thing that could happen.”

  Something was definitely wrong. What it was or why, was a complete mystery to him.

  He sighed. “Rae, I’m sorry, I didn’t introduce you to my parents last night,” he said, kneeling down in front of her. He took her hands and held them in his. “Had I known it was so important to you, I would have.” Which was the absolute truth. He ran the pads of his thumbs over her knuckles. “I didn’t think the timing was very good. I wanted to give you—and them—time to rest before making a first impression on the other.”

  An emotion he couldn’t identify flickered in her eyes, and she squeezed his hands. “All right.”

  Feeling just a little more confidence, Simon stood and led Rae from his bedchamber down the stairs to the dining room.

  Unlike what he was sure she was used to at Lord Drakely’s and Lord Townson’s, the Appleton’s dining room was a smaller room with a simple table and not an overabundant amount of chairs.

  “Mother, Father,” Simon intoned from the doorway, squeezing Rae’s hand for encouragement. “I’d like you both to meet my bride, the newly minted Henrietta Appleton.” He pulled his wife closer to him. “Rae, this is my mother, Katherine and my father, Walter Appleton.”

  Rae’s mouth went dry. She’d been so confident that she’d be able to display a confidence she didn’t feel when meeting them, but now…

  “It’s nice to meet you, dear,” Mrs. Appleton said with a smile. “Bexley hasn’t quite finished breakfast, so how about if the two of us go get acquainted in the drawing room?”

  Panic built in Rae’s chest. Mrs. Appleton had just met her and now she wanted to be alone with her? Would she interrogate her to see if Rae was up to her standards for marriage to her son? Would she inform Rae that Simon was using her to heal his broken heart? What would Rae say in response to her?

  “We’ll all go,” Simon said smoothly.

  Thankful Simon didn’t intend to leave her alone with his mother; Rae drew closer to him and allowed him to escort her down to the drawing room. He steered her toward the blue settee and helped her get settled while his parents filed in and sat down in the armed chairs across the room.

  An uncomfortable tension filled the room as the four of them exchanged looks, but uttered not a word.

  “How are you finding marriage, dear?” Mrs. Appleton asked a few minutes later, clearly as uncomfortable as Rae.

  “Simon’s been very good to me, Mrs. Appleton.”

  “You’ll have to call me, Katherine
,” the older woman said, tucking a tendril of hair behind her ear. “With two Mrs. Appletons in residence, it will bring about chaos.”

  Rae appreciated the older woman’s gesture for what it was. Nobody would be confused as to which Mrs. Appleton was being referred to. She just didn’t know how else to invite Rae to use her Christian name. Rae’s heart hurt a little. Mrs. Appleton…er…Katherine truly believed Simon was using Rae and likely felt like she was walking on a pond that had iced over and was waiting for it to break.

  “Thank you, but I’d only feel right about calling you by your Christian name, if you’ll call me by mine.”

  “Oh for heaven’s sakes, you two,” Simon burst out. “Mother, there will be no confusion as to which Mrs. Appleton anyone is referring to around here. Besides—” he flashed Rae a wolfish smile— “we will be moving to our own home where Rae will be the only Mrs. Appleton.”

  “You should look on Brooks Street,” Mr. Appleton murmured. “I was over there two days ago and passed a quaint little townhouse for rent.”

  “Thank you, Father, however, I’ve already purchased one. It’s on Grant Street.”

  The air crackled in the room.

  “You did?” his mother asked, her clear blue eyes darting back and forth between Simon and Rae.

  “Yes.” A smug expression came over his face. Odd. “I signed the papers yesterday and collected the key. Rae’s things are all moved in, and I’ll have my things moved over today.”

  Katherine’s hand fluttered to her chest. “I see.”

  Just then, Bexley entered the room and announced that breakfast was ready.

  Rae was off her bottom before the man’s sentence was complete. If leaving without eating was an option, she’d cast a vote for such. Unfortunately, she highly doubted it was.