Draw Me Close

by Nicole Michaels

  She knew what he was doing. The right thing. That’s what Derek did. And she appreciated it, but as much as she hated to admit it, she missed the way it had been before when they’d been working on the house together. The stolen glances, not-so-accidental touches, and innuendos.

  “When are you going out again?” Callie asked.

  “Unfortunately not this week. Now that the weather’s getting nice again he has a lot of projects starting up in town so he’s really busy.”

  “But the coed party is next weekend, so you’ll see him then,” Anne said.

  “See? I knew what I was doing when I had this idea. Now you guys can get your own room!” The delight in Callie’s eyes made them all laugh.

  “I don’t know about that. Remember, we’re trying to do this the right way.”

  Callie scoffed. “Please. Sometimes the right way is naked.”

  Eighteen

  Thursday morning Derek looked up from his drafting table as his administrative assistant, Molly, walked into his office. Her eyes were wide—panicked—and instantly his stomach knotted.

  “What’s wrong?” His thoughts immediately went to Tanner.

  “Code red just pulled in,” she said. “Looks pissed.”

  Beyond his office they both heard the front door open. Molly scurried back out front.

  Derek cursed under his breath and dropped his pencil. Within seconds Lisa was strutting through his office door and stopping him in his tracks. Molly wasn’t lying. Lisa was furious.

  She walked right up to the table and slammed a folded newspaper on top of the plans he’d been working on. Pencils scattered to the floor.

  “Good morning to you, too, Lisa,” he said.

  “What the hell is this?” She nodded to the photo on the front cover of the Home and Hobby section. Derek hadn’t needed to glance down to know what she’d found, but he did. The first thing he noticed was how despite the tension between him and Lindsey that day, the photographer had managed to capture them both looking genuinely happy. They’d chosen a photo from the garden steps. Lindsey leaned against his side, glancing over her shoulder and smiling. Derek smiled back at her. He was pretty sure he remembered what had preceded that moment.

  The second thing he noticed was the title of the article: RESTORING THE PAST PT 3: THE COUPLE BEHIND THE RENO. Well, shit.

  “‘Restoring the Past’? Are you shitting me, Derek? It says you knew this girl in college. Is she the one? The one you dated?” Lisa screeched. She was nearly shaking. Derek blew out a long breath. The title could not have been more accurate—or awful in this situation—if they’d tried. Lisa had known from mutual friends that he’d been seeing someone before they’d found out she was pregnant. He’d been unwilling to discuss details with her then, not that she hadn’t tried to throw it in his face from time to time.

  “Lisa, I can explain this.”

  “Oh, can you? Can you also explain to me why you robbed me of ten years of my life? Because I can’t seem to get over that one.” That was the understatement of the year.

  Derek’s fingers clamped down on the bridge of his nose. If she was counting their time together in high school—and obviously she was—ten years was how long they’d been together. God, so damn long. Too long.

  “Lisa, what do you want me to say? We’ve had this conversation so many times. But this”—he pointed to the article—“is misleading. We just happen to be working on the house together. Did you even read the entire article?” And maybe that was a stupid question because he hadn’t read it. But what could it possibly say except the truth?

  She gave a bitter laugh. “Oh, hooo, oh yes. I read the article. You two are ‘just the perfect couple to renovate a house for their good friends,’ and ‘who knows, Walsh and Morales might be creating more than a beautiful house together.’ Do you have any respect for me, Derek?”

  “Believe it or not, this has nothing to do with you.”

  “It has everything to do with me and our son.”

  Derek felt sick to his stomach. This was exactly what he’d wanted to avoid with his ex-wife. It hadn’t even occurred to him that she’d see these photos and realize that Lindsey was a woman from his past. Or even worse, that this Vanessa woman would put her own spin on the story.

  But how could he fault the journalist? It wasn’t really a spin. Sure she’d taken some liberties, but what she’d picked up on between them was dead-on.

  “I just cannot believe you would do this to me. Again.”

  Blinding fury washed over Derek. To her? If he’d done anything to her it was give her a home, a hefty bank account, and a beautiful son.

  “What the hell does that mean, Lisa? The first time I left her. Do you get that? I was in love with her and I left her for you!”

  Sharp pain filled her eyes and instantly Derek felt like an asshole for the outburst.

  “Thank you very much for your sympathy marriage. I’m so sorry I’m not more grateful. I need to remind myself that you did me a favor, because isn’t that every girl’s dream? To get knocked up and then have her baby daddy marry her out of a sense of obligation?”

  “Lisa, damn it. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry.” He’d never admitted out loud that he’d been in love with Lindsey. He knew Lisa had to have suspected he’d had feelings for someone else, but saying something out loud made it real. And his love for Lindsey had been the most real emotion he’d ever known.

  Lisa’s lips trembled. “Why did you do that to me?”

  Derek knew there was no right answer to this question. He’d tried them all because they’d had this conversation so many times. Every variation of it. “Lisa, please—”

  “I hate you for it.”

  Derek took a step closer. “I know you do, and I sometimes I hate myself for what I did to us. It was wrong. I let my—”

  “Stop it.” Her face went from heartbreak to rage. “Don’t you dare blame your asshole father for your choices. You’re a man, Derek. Not a child. Start acting like it.”

  Lisa stormed toward the door before turning hard. “Speaking of children. If you let that bitch within one inch of my son, your visits are over. Don’t think for one minute I won’t do everything in my power to make you suffer the way you’ve made me.”

  He stood there in complete shock as he listened to the front door and open and close. When Molly peeked her head in he could barely breathe, let alone speak.

  “You okay?” she asked quietly.

  “No. I’m not okay. But … everything’s fine, Molly.”

  “Clearly that’s not true, but I won’t push. How about I go grab you some lunch? You’ve been hunched over that table for almost four hours.”

  He managed a tight smile. Molly was a really good employee. He owed her a lot and hated that she’d had to witness this. She was a single mother herself, since her husband had passed away a few years ago. Derek scrubbed a hand over his face. “I’m not really hungry. But why don’t you take off? Use the expense card and get some takeout for you and Katelyn.”

  Molly gave a sheepish smile. “You don’t have to buy our meals, Derek. You pay me, remember?”

  “Of course. And I know I don’t have to. I want to. I’m sorry you had to be here for that.”

  Molly stepped into his office. “Don’t be too hard on yourself, okay? She’ll get over it. There’s no way she could have expected you to stay single forever. You’re not doing anything wrong.”

  “Feels like I’m always doing something wrong.”

  “You’re a good guy, Derek. You just need to stop trying to make everyone else happy.”

  Molly smiled and left the room. After a few minutes he heard her leave and lock up the front door behind her.

  All his life Derek had tried to do the right thing. Why did it so often backfire?

  Maybe Molly was right, that he just needed to stop trying so damn hard and just live how he wanted. In the meantime he would have to walk on thin ice with Lisa. He didn’t want to lose Lindsey again, but if c
aring for her cost him a relationship with his son he wasn’t sure he’d ever forgive himself.

  He found himself in the same predicament he’d been the first time he’d loved Lindsey. And it wasn’t her fault she was one of the innocent victims of his stupidity. This time had to be different. He just needed to figure out how to do the right thing, not hurt anyone, and get the girl he was in love with.

  * * *

  Friday evening the girls met at Anne’s house to have their final meeting before the wedding, which was now only three weeks away. Callie and Lindsey had agreed that for the two weeks prior to the event, and then the week after, they would take over the daily blog business. Anne would post when it worked for her, and luckily they’d prepped all their followers. Everyone knew what was happening and they were all excited.

  “I can’t believe how many gifts you’ve gotten from readers,” Lindsey said. The entire kitchen table, coffee table, and the corners of the living room floor were covered in packages.

  “I know, it makes me feel bad,” Anne said. She held up a hand-stitched set of kitchen towels.

  “You shouldn’t feel bad. You didn’t ask them for gifts, in fact you’ve said ‘Please, no need for gifts’ if I recall.”

  Anne sighed. “I did, after receiving the first few. I shouldn’t have shared them on social media because now I feel like I need to share everyone’s gifts, which only makes people feel the need to send gifts, it’s like an ugly cycle I can’t break.”

  “Yeah, an ugly cycle where you get tons of presents,” Callie said, confused.

  They all laughed at that and then Lindsey spoke again. “Seriously, Anne. People are sending gifts because they want to. Many of them are handmade and when you share online it makes them feel good. Why don’t we just save the rest in a pile and then post one big picture of them all with a thank-you after the wedding? We’ve made it very clear that you’re busy.”

  “That’s a good idea,” Anne said. “That’s what I’ll do. I can even include links at the end for the ones that have their own shops online. I’m sure some just really want them featured.”

  “Are you keeping track?” Lindsey asked. “Or would you like me to come over and make up a list?”

  Anne looked relieved. “Oh, would you? That would be wonderful.”

  Lindsey smiled. “How about I come over tomorrow morning and then we can get ready for that night?”

  “Oh well, then I’m coming, too,” Callie said. “We can all get ready together and then go check into our room.”

  Saturday was the day of the coed bachelor party and, after all of her previous worry, Lindsey was now really looking forward to it.

  “Okay. Now let’s discuss this,” Callie said. Lindsey looked over to see Callie holding up the newspaper article that featured her and Derek.

  Lindsey had definitely seen it. In fact, much to her chagrin the first person to show her had been Mel. Surprisingly she’d been nothing but positive, mainly talking about Lindsey’s shoes and hair.

  Callie pointed to the photo at the top of the article. “Let’s start with these killer heels.”

  Rolling her eyes, Lindsey laughed. “My sister brought the shoes up also.”

  “They are really good shoes,” Anne said, before taking a bite of her giant salad. She’d committed to a thirty-day no-gluten and no-sugar diet in order to feel good in her wedding dress. They’d tried to convince her it wasn’t necessary, but Lindsey could hardly blame her. If she was getting married she’d probably do exactly the same.

  They were discussing the article further when Lindsey’s phone vibrated on the table. Everyone looked over just as Derek’s name popped up on the screen. Callie’s eyes flew to Lindsey’s, wide and curious.

  Lindsey slowly picked up the phone and answered it. “Hello.”

  “Hey, Linds.” Derek’s voice rumbled through the line, sending chills through every inch of her body. She looked up to see both of her friends’ eyes on her.

  “Hey, what’s going on?” She figured it was best to make it seem like this didn’t happen too often, which was actually the truth.

  “I was just thinking about you.” Derek laughed, almost as if he were nervous. Was that possible, that Derek felt awkward about calling her?

  “Oh well, can you hang on a minute?”

  “Sure,” he said.

  Lindsey put her hand over the phone and stood up before speaking to Anne and Callie who were both smiling. “I’ll be right back.”

  “You better be,” Callie teased.

  Lindsey stepped into Anne’s kitchen and sat down at the table. She brought the phone back up to her ear. “Okay, I’m back.”

  “Sorry, I should have asked if you were busy.”

  “It’s okay, I’m just with Anne and Callie,” Lindsey said.

  “Oh good.” Was it her imagination or did he sound relieved? “I just wanted to hear your voice.”

  “Oh … okay. Is everything all right?”

  Derek chuckled, sounding surprised. “Yeah, of course. Can’t I just want to hear your voice for no reason?”

  It was Lindsey’s turn to laugh quietly. “I guess. Just surprised me, that’s all. I’m not used to you calling me.”

  “We used to talk on the phone for hours,” Derek said. Lindsey sucked in a breath, remembering. She’d had the pattern of the cheap ceiling tiles in her dorm room memorized from lying in bed, the phone to her ear. “Do you remember that?”

  “Yes.”

  They were both quiet for a long moment and Lindsey just had a feeling something was off. This kind of behavior wasn’t like him. “As much I as like the idea of you just wanting to hear my voice, are you sure everything is okay?”

  “Yes. Everything is fine.” He sighed into the phone. “I do hate my ex-wife right now but that’s not your problem.”

  Lindsey stayed quiet for a moment, unsure of what to say. Then Derek spoke up again.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that. I should just let you go.”

  “Wait. Tell me what happened.” She couldn’t believe she was inviting this man to tell her his problems about the woman he’d left her for. She closed her eyes for a second. “Please.”

  “How about you just come over here,” he said quietly. There was a hint of seduction in his voice.

  Lindsey’s eyes flew open. “Now?”

  “Yeah, now.”

  “Derek, have you been drinking?”

  “Uh, a little.”

  “Sounds like a little too much.”

  “Okay, maybe so, but even if I was stone-cold sober I would still want you here.”

  “Can you first tell me what happened?”

  “Linds,” he growled. “I need you.”

  Lindsey stood up, unable to be still any longer. “Give me your address.”

  He didn’t speak for a second, as if he were surprised she’d agreed. Finally he said, “I’ll text it to you. When can you leave?”

  “Probably … ten minutes or so.”

  “Then I guess I’ll see you soon.”

  They said their good-byes and Lindsey inhaled a deep breath. Then grinned. Derek had invited her over to his place. And she was going. This was not taking it slow. Or dating. This was simply him needing her and reaching out. It felt a little scary. But it also felt completely right.

  Nineteen

  As soon as Derek texted Lindsey his address he glanced around his house. It was clean enough, he’d showered after work, and now he needed to brush his damn teeth because drinking three bottles of beer didn’t make for ideal breath.

  He wasn’t drunk, but he was clearly buzzed enough to drunk-dial Lindsey and ask her to come over. Still pretty pathetic.

  His intentions had been good when he’d suggested he and Lindsey try dating the right way. He wanted her to feel safe with him. Trust him. They needed to really get to know one another as the people they were now. And they’d started to. But the one thing he knew was that every second he didn’t touch her was one he might never get back.
He didn’t trust himself, he didn’t trust fate, and he wanted to have her again the right way. How it should have been a few weeks ago. Not on a whim in an old strange house.

  After brushing his teeth, he downed a glass of water and took some pain pills to try and fend off the inevitable headache he’d have in the morning. He didn’t drink that often, maybe once a week if that, and really never at home. But ever since Lisa’s visit the day before he’d been in a bad mood.

  The worst part was the guilt. What he’d done to Lisa was wrong. Just as wrong as what he’d done to Lindsey. But they’d all suffered. He had as much as anyone.

  Derek’s doorbell rang and he strode over to the front door, pulling it open. There stood the best thing to ever happen to him. Twice now. Lindsey’s smile was shy as she stepped inside.

  “Hi,” she whispered.

  “Hi.”

  And with that out of the way, Derek grabbed the sides of her face and kissed her. Instantly she melted against him, kissing him back. Her lips were warm and wet. Urgent. Or maybe that was him, because if he didn’t have this woman soon he was going to explode. He continued to kiss her thoroughly before letting his mouth roam over her chin, down her neck.

  “Derek.” Her breathy whisper sent a chill through his torso that landed heavy in in his cock.

  “What?” Not waiting for her answer, he lifted his head from her neck and sought her mouth again. Her muffled moans got lost in his kiss. Their tongues met in a wet slide against each other and he trailed his fingers down her body.

  Lindsey pulled back and looked at him. “Are you sure you don’t need to talk? I was worried about you.”

  And he truly loved that she was concerned for him, but right now only one thing was going to help. “After,” he said.

  “Can we use a real bed this time?”

  Derek huffed out a laugh and grabbed her hand before leading her through the house and up the stairs to his bedroom. Once there he turned on a bedside lamp and then turned to yank her into his arms.

  “You feel so good.” His palms slipped down her back, over her ass, as he pulled her against him.