Innocent Wife, Baby of Shame

by MELANIE MILBURNE

  ‘Yes,’ he said, sending her a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

  Keira silently seethed. She was sure the woman she had overheard in the ladies’ room was right. He was doing it deliberately as a payback for what she had done. What better torture to dish out than to have her live and sleep with him for six weeks, knowing he was taking his pleasure elsewhere?

  The meal was served but she barely touched it. She pushed each course as it was served around her plate, the occasional mouthful making it past her lips, but she tasted nothing but bitterness and regret.

  A band began to play, which was a relief as it meant she no longer had to force herself to make conversation with the other guests at their table as the music was too loud to hear what anyone was saying with any accuracy.

  Patrizio leaned towards her to speak directly against her ear. ‘We should dance.’

  ‘Should we?’ she replied, her lips almost touching the cartilage of his ear.

  He took her hand and pulled her to her feet before she could protest and led her to the dance floor, his arms going around her, bringing her in close to his pelvis as the band switched numbers to play a romantic ballad.

  Keira had been prepared to dance a modern number with plenty of room between them, but having his body move in time with hers in a slow seductive dance was almost too much to bear. Her body betrayed her totally, her breasts tightened and peaked against the silk of her gown, her inner thighs moistened with the humid dew of desire and her lips began to tingle with the urge to feel his mouth pressing hard on hers.

  ‘Relax, cara,’ he said against her hair. ‘You are like a broomstick.’

  ‘Sorry…’ She gave a little stumble but he steadied her by cupping her bottom with his hands.

  ‘I had forgotten how well we fit together,’ he said as they circled the dance floor. ‘The top of your head fits just beneath my chin.’

  ‘Only because I’m wearing heels.’

  ‘We shall make a move to leave soon,’ he said after they had weaved through the other couples who had joined them. ‘I do not want you to have too late a night. We have another engagement tomorrow evening.’

  She looked up at him in alarm. ‘We do?’

  ‘Take that worried look off your face,’ he said in an undertone. ‘Yes, I have organised to take the boys out for a meal. I have already cleared it with the headmaster.’

  Keira felt her stomach go hollow. Jamie, of all people, would surely see through her thin façade. ‘Won’t your nephew object to being forced to spend the evening with Jamie, not to mention me?’ she asked.

  His hands fell away from her body to ensnare one of her hands as he led her from the dance floor. ‘Bruno knows I expect him to behave with propriety, no matter what his feelings towards you or your brother are.’

  ‘What about you?’ she asked as they made their way to the waiting limousine. ‘Will you behave with propriety or do you have a different set of rules for yourself?’

  His black diamond gaze clashed with hers as he opened the door for her. ‘Do not speak to me of rules, Keira,’ he said in a clipped tone. ‘After all, you are the one who doesn’t know how to play by the rules.’

  Keira bit back her retort when she heard other people spilling out of the hotel. Instead she got in the car, swishing her gown out of the way as he joined her on the seat.

  She clenched her hands around her purse until her knuckles ached. She had to get control of her emotions. She knew it did her no favours where Patrizio was concerned. Losing her temper and sniping at him would only reinforce his opinion of her as a willful, unruly, unprincipled child. But it had hurt so much to see him huddled so companionably with that woman. Tears burned in her eyes but she blinked them back, focusing her attention on the strangled purse in her lap.

  ‘The driver will take you home but I have to go back to my office to see to something urgent,’ he said into the brittle silence a few minutes later. ‘I am not sure what time I will be back.’

  Keira swung her glittering blue gaze to his. ‘I saw you talking to her,’ she said. ‘She’s still your mistress, isn’t she?’

  He didn’t bat an eyelid, she noticed, her resentment towards him burning deep and uncontrollably inside her.

  ‘As of a few days ago she was—yes,’ he responded smoothly. ‘But in the interests of the boys I have temporarily suspended our involvement.’

  Pain sliced through her, sharp unbearable pain that made her feel as if she were being taken apart piece by piece. No part of her was unaffected. She struggled to contain her reaction, every scrap of pride insisting she keep her voice even and controlled as if she didn’t give a toss what he did or who he did it with.

  ‘So after these six weeks are up you’re going back to her?’ she asked, forcing herself to meet that dark enigmatic gaze.

  ‘That is the plan,’ he said as the car drew to a halt outside his office tower.

  Keira watched as he exited the car, his long strides taking him out of sight within a few seconds.

  She sat back on the seat and laid her head back against the soft leather, her eyes tightly closed to keep back the bitter tears.

  You have no right to be feeling so jealous, she reminded herself. You brought this on yourself and have no one else to blame.

  No one but yourself…

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  KEIRA woke the next morning to find the bed had not been slept in on Patrizio’s side. Her heart sank in despair as visions of him intimately entwined with Gisela Hunter filled her brain.

  She threw off the bed covers and headed for the shower but even the scalding hot spray did nothing to ease the deep ache in her soul.

  Marietta was bustling about the kitchen when Keira dragged herself downstairs with her art school backpack, which had arrived with the rest of her things the day before.

  ‘Signor Trelini must have had a very early start, no?’ the housekeeper said.

  ‘Er…yes,’ Keira said, glad she’d thought to ruffle the sheets on his side before she came downstairs.

  ‘You want some breakfast? I have bacon and eggs and—’

  ‘No, thank you, Marietta,’ she said quickly as her stomach started to heave. ‘I have to get to college. I have to finish some work for my final exhibition.’

  Marietta peered at her. ‘Are you feeling all right? You look very pale.’

  Keira swallowed once or twice until the rolling waves of nausea stilled. ‘I’m fine…really…I hate mornings. I never feel really human until about lunch time.’

  ‘The separation, it was hard on you, no?’ Marietta commented softly.

  Keira felt tears rush to her eyes at the older woman’s empathetic tone. ‘Yes…yes it was but things are better now…’

  ‘You are nearly finished your Masters degree, yes?’

  ‘Yes,’ Keira said with a relieved sigh. ‘I just have to put the finishing touches to my portfolio of work and I’m done.’

  ‘You are a very clever girl,’ Marietta said. ‘Me, I cannot draw a straight line.’

  ‘My work is what you call abstract,’ Keira explained. ‘It’s not to everyone’s taste.’ Not my parents’, in any case, she tacked on mentally.

  ‘Ah, but it is a gift to be able to translate your thoughts and feelings on to a canvas, is it not?’

  ‘Yes, I guess so,’ Keira said, recalling how her painting had been almost cathartic at times. ‘But I don’t think about what I’m feeling all the time; I just feel the urge to paint and I paint.’

  ‘I feel the urge to cook,’ the housekeeper said with a grin. ‘But you are frustrating me for you do not eat. You are thinner than you used to be. You are not dieting, are you?’

  ‘No, I just haven’t been well for a few weeks,’ she said. ‘I got a bad stomach bug on top of the flu and haven’t really picked up since.’

  ‘You will be much better now you are back home,’ Marietta said confidently. ‘You were pining for him, no?’

  ‘Yes, that’s right,’ Keira said, suddenly realising
it was true. ‘I was pining for him…”

  Keira lost track of time in the studio at college. She had been allocated a small studio which she shared with another Masters student, who fortunately was not working that day, so it was a treat to be alone.

  She looked at her watch after what had seemed to her to be only an hour to find that it was close to six p.m. She quickly cleaned her brushes and, locking up the studio, caught the next tram.

  Patrizio was waiting for her when she arrived, his expression tight with anger. ‘You are late,’ he said and, running his eyes over her, added, ‘and you are filthy.’

  ‘I was working on my portfolio, I lost track of time.’

  ‘You should have phoned.’

  ‘There isn’t a phone at the studio,’ she said, starting to feel irritated by his tone.

  ‘I have bought you a new mobile,’ he said. ‘It is charging in the kitchen. In future I would appreciate it if you would carry it at all times so you can let me know when you are going to be late.’

  ‘You didn’t come home at all last night and do you hear me bawling you out for not phoning to let me know what your arrangements were?’ she threw at him crossly.

  ‘You are not in a position to argue with me over my private arrangements,’ he said with an imperious look.

  ‘Your double standards make me sick,’ she said. ‘In spite of what you said to the contrary, you’re continuing your affair with that woman to make me jealous.’

  ‘Making you jealous would be a pointless exercise,’ he put in coolly. ‘You would have to be still in love with me for it to work, but you are not. You were not in love with me in the first place.’

  ‘That’s not true. I did love you.’ I do love you, she silently added.

  His lip curled in disdain. ‘Your parents were right about you. They warned me you are wilful and disobedient, with a propensity for volatility and attention-seeking behaviour. I should have listened to them, not to mention some of my business associates who thought I was a fool for marrying you instead of just having a quick affair. They told me you were after my money but I stubbornly refused to listen.’

  ‘Then why on earth did you marry me?’ she tossed back. ‘You could have just slept with me and saved yourself some hefty legal bills.’

  His fists clenched by his sides, a nerve pulsing near his mouth, which was white-tipped with anger. ‘That reminds me,’ he said, reaching for an envelope and handing it to her. ‘This came for you. It’s from your lawyer.’

  Keira took it from him with trembling fingers, glancing briefly at her lawyer’s name and emblem on the left hand side of the envelope.

  ‘Aren’t you going to open it?’ he asked after a short tense pause.

  ‘Not right now,’ she said, not sure that she wanted him to see what was documented there. Her lawyer, Rosemary Matheson, was a little on the ruthless side when it came to dealing with divorce settlements. Half the time Keira hadn’t even listened to what Rosemary had said during their appointments. She’d usually sat picking at her cuticles, agreeing to whatever was suggested, hoping it would get Patrizio’s attention and bring him storming back into her life.

  ‘If you think for a moment that you are going to get half of my money, think again, Keira,’ he said through lips pulled tight with anger. ‘I will agree to a considerable payout but no way am I going to set you up for life after what you did to me. You duped me from the start.’

  Keira looked up at him in confusion. ‘What do you mean, I duped you from the start?’

  ‘You led me to believe you were a virgin,’ he said. ‘I realise now, of course, that was all an act. You only told me that to reel me in to marry you.’

  She stared at him open-mouthed. ‘You think I lied about that?’

  His eyes burned into hers. ‘Didn’t you?’

  Her bottom lip began to tremble and she spun away so he wouldn’t see it. ‘No,’ she said in a flat empty tone. ‘You were my first lover.’

  ‘But not your only one.’

  She stiffened her spine and made her way to the stairs. ‘I’m going to have a shower.’

  ‘Keira.’

  ‘I said I’m going to have a shower.’ She kept moving, one foot after the other, knowing if she didn’t get away from him right now he would see the devastation she was feeling.

  She hadn’t even heard him come up behind her. Suddenly she was on the landing with him holding her by the upper arms in an iron grip, his mouth thinned out with fury.

  ‘You are determined to make me lose control, aren’t you, Keira?’ he asked. ‘You want something to hold over me, some supposed misdemeanour that will make you feel less guilty about what you did.’

  ‘No…’ She struggled in his hold but he wouldn’t release her. ‘No, that’s not true.’

  ‘You are a wanton witch,’ he ground out. ‘You cannot live without a man in your bed. I see the hunger in your eyes. I saw it when you came to my office the other day. You are insatiable. One man was not enough for you. It is never going to be enough for you.’

  She closed her eyes to shield herself from his hatred.

  ‘Look at me, damn you!’ he shouted, his fingers biting into her flesh.

  Keira opened her eyes but by doing so opened the floodgates of her distress. She stood shaking in his hold, tears pouring from her eyes, sobs erupting from her throat with such brokenness that she felt her legs sway beneath her.

  ‘Keira…’he said, his voice catching on her name. ‘Do not do this. Why are you acting this way? It is not like you to cry at the drop of a hat.’

  ‘P-please let me g-go…’ she said between sobs.

  Patrizio released her arms and brought her head down to his chest, one of his hands going to the nape of her neck. ‘Shh,’ he said, rocking her gently. ‘Shh, cara mio.’

  Keira snuggled against him, her anger towards him gradually abating as his tender caresses broke through her puny firewall of defences. She breathed in the clean male scent of him, her senses on full alert as his hand moved from her neck to her hair, his long fingers becoming entangled in her wild curls.

  ‘I am not sure I can get through six weeks of this,’ he said, his breath ruffling her hair. ‘I thought I could, but now I’m not so sure.’

  ‘Me too,’ she whispered between noisy little sniffs. ‘It’s too hard…’

  He tilted her chin up to look into her tear-washed blue eyes. ‘I am perhaps not as immune to you as I thought,’ he conceded grudgingly. ‘My common sense says one thing but my body says another.’

  She moistened the parched surface of her lips with the tip of her tongue. ‘Mine too…’

  ‘So what do we do about it?’ he asked.

  Keira held her breath, her eyes locked on his, her lower body throbbing against the surging heat of his. ‘I don’t know….’ she said. ‘Maybe ignore it and it will go away?’

  He smiled lopsidedly. ‘That is just so typical of you, Keira,’ he said without any trace of malice in his tone. ‘You do not like to face facts. You prefer to hide under the bed covers, yes?’

  She felt a tiny wry smile tugging at her mouth at his accurate assessment of her character. ‘I know, it’s pathetic, isn’t it? I should have well and truly grown out of the habit by now.’

  He cupped her left cheek in the warmth of his hand. ‘It is one of the things that made me fall in love with you. I do not think you should change.’

  She looked at him with wide eyes; her heart suddenly seeming to need more space than it was currently allocated inside her chest. She watched as his mouth came down as if in slow motion, his breath briefly caressing the surface of her lips in that millisecond before the final touchdown.

  As soon as his mouth covered hers, heat exploded in her belly. Flames of need licked and danced along her flesh until she was whimpering against the sensual assault of his mouth on hers. The first demanding thrust of his tongue rocked her to the core, liquid longing weeping from the walls of her femininity, the pulsing ache between her thighs almost unbearable
.

  His hands delved into her hair, holding her head as he deepened the kiss, his legs moving forwards against hers, making her step backwards until she was up against the wall.

  She heard him groan with need as his hands left her hair to tear at her clothing, her loose-fitting cotton shirt popping every single button as he removed it from her. Her bra was next, the fastening barely undone before his mouth was sucking on each of her engorged nipples, his tongue rolling and curling until she was teetering on the edge of ecstasy.

  He lifted his mouth from her breast to look into her eyes. ‘You are the only person who can reduce me to this within seconds,’ he said. ‘I swore I would not touch you, but now that I have I do not want to stop.’

  She clutched at him with desperate hands. ‘I don’t want you to stop. I want you to make love to me. I’ve missed you so much.’

  ‘I cannot wait any longer to feel you again,’ he said, lifting her skirt to cup her, his fingers moving aside the lacy barrier of her knickers to sink into her.

  ‘Oh, God…’ she groaned as his fingers rubbed against her intimately. ‘Oh, please…please…’

  He unzipped his trousers and released himself into her hands but he was too far gone for any preliminaries. After a brief moment he pushed her hands away and drove into her with a deep primal groan of satisfaction as her slippery warmth enclosed him tightly.

  It was madness, it was far too rushed, it was reckless and almost savage, but it was unstoppable. Keira wondered if she was doing the right thing by agreeing to such intimacy between them while so much bitterness coloured their current relationship, but even as she rehearsed the words to slow things down her body had spun out of control.

  Each urgent thrust took her higher and higher, her senses spinning as his mouth fed hungrily off hers. Her body sang with pleasure, every part of her responding to him with such instinctive fervour she could barely believe they had spent the last two months apart. Their bodies were still so in tune with each other, she knew him so intimately, and she knew exactly the moment when he was hovering on the edge of the precipice, his body tensing before the final devastating plunge into paradise.