I did a quick head count. Everyone was there but Deacon. Where was he? I swung around.
He leaned against a doorway passing his stake from one hand to another, seemingly not paying attention to what was going on around him. I left Micah to handle the humans and made my way to him.
“You okay?”
He shrugged. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
The murmurs on the background were jovial. Everyone seemed very happy except for the guy standing in front of me.
“You don’t seem happy.” I would have thought he would be more excited than anyone.
“I’m happy.” He finally stopped moving his stake around and pointed at my arm. “You’re bleeding. Are you hurt badly?”
“No, it’s nothing.” I hadn’t realized I bled.
“We’ll get that fixed for you before we go back.”
Nodding, I wondered if he deliberately changed the subject. “What’s wrong?”
“It was too easy.” He motioned around the room. “Hardly any resistance.”
“It’s daytime and the vamps in the feeding zones are lazy. You said so yourself.”
“Yes. But think about it. When you came and you found me locked up in that cage, it wasn’t this easy, was it?”
“I was alone and unprepared.” My mouth went dry as I spoke.
“The vamps were easy that day. I didn’t understand how easy because I’d never fought back before but they were simple. Having said that, they weren’t alone. There were wolves there. They didn’t fight because they chose not to. They ran away.” Deacon looked right and left. “Where are the wolves? In all my years underground, there were always wolves.”
“Oh, darn it.” I nodded. He was right. Where the wolves, and why had it been so easy?
Micah’s bomb had been off. The wolves were missing. My mind whirled at the possibilities. I liked none of them.
Chapter Five
Tia’s baby stared up at me, his bald head shiny under the remainder of the sunlight streaming through the windows of Tia’s tent. His blue eyes were huge and seem to take up most of his face.
Tia laid him down in his crib moments before she’d told me she needed to clean up. Apparently, that meant I had to babysit him.
In the background the splashing from her bathing stopped. Nero chose that moment to start to make noise. Tia might have been ready to handle a baby at seventeen, but not me. Nowhere near ready.
I grabbed my throat. The very thought of a baby made my windpipe feel tighter.
“Thanks for watching him.” Tia came out running a towel over her head. She’d lost most of her baby weight immediately but her breasts seemed to have swelled to the size of small pumpkins. “I don’t think I’ve bathed in three days.”
“Um. Is your mom around?”
“I sent her home. Do this, don’t do that. Nero is my baby. I know how to take care of him.”
“Okay.” I scratched my head. Tia discounted her mother, took her for granted. I would have done anything to have a mother around, and I hoped I wouldn’t have thrown her out of my tent for trying to help me if she’d lived. But, who knows? Maybe I would have.
“Isn’t he beautiful? Everyone says he looks like Glen, but I think he resembles Chad and me.”
I stared down at the baby. Did he resemble Chad? He just seemed small and fragile. How did any of us make it out of baby-hood alive?
“Yes. I can see that.” I told Tia what she wanted to hear rather than trying to have a real conversation. Our friendship had long since left us. I knew it. I guessed she did. But neither of us wanted to be the one to say it.
Keith and Tiffani wanted me to go over there and coo over their baby, too. After that, I really hoped to get a nap.
“Who do you think it is?”
I blinked. “What?”
“Groan. Rachel. Groan. Are you even listening to me?”
I had not been. “Sorry, it’s just that Nero is so cute.”
Her face brightened at my words. “He is, isn’t he?” Tia bent over and picked him up. She held his head in her hand as if he might break if she dropped him. “Do you want to hold him?”
I cleared my throat loudly. “I think I might be getting sick.”
“Oh.” Her eyes got huge. “Then maybe you better not.”
Exactly what I had wanted. “I’m sorry, you were saying?”
“Who do you think the hundred people who broke those survivors out of the vampire lair were?”
My skin tingled. “One hundred people? How did you come up with that number?”
“Mom says that’s what the survivors are reporting. One hundred masked rescuers charged into the vampire lair, broke them out, and then vanished as soon as they’d deposited them on the outskirts of Genesis.”
If she spoke the truth, then the newest members of our small society needed to have their memories checked. There were thirty-four of us, including the wolves, who hadn’t even participated in the raid this time.
“I told Mom it’s got to be Dad, Keith, and the older Warriors. No one else is anywhere near talented enough to pull it off.” She shrugged as she walked to the bed to sit down. Without even looking at what she did, she pulled her breast out of her shirt and positioned the baby to start feeding. I quickly looked away. I did not want to see that, ever. How did she do that? The thought made me nauseous. “Mom insisted that if Dad were off rescuing people from vampire holes, she would know about it. Have you seen them?”
I shook my head. “Not yet. You?”
“No. I’m stuck here all the time. Maybe Glen has.”
The mention of her husband made me cringe. What did it say that Tia assumed her best friend and her husband were not talented enough Warriors to bring back two dozen human refugees from a vampire camp?
I rubbed my forehead. Maybe I wanted credit more than I’d realized. At least by the people who should be thinking highly of me.
“Well, I need to go.” I really did. Before I confessed the whole thing to Tia. I knew better but my instincts honed by years of having her as my closest friend made me feel foolish. Maybe we would move past this….
“I’m so happy I don’t have to live your life anymore.”
I blinked. “I’m happy for you, too.” Even if every decision she’d made seemed cringe-worthy to me. Married to Glen with a baby? Give me a vampire and a stake any day of the week.
I made a beeline for the tent flap and as I exited, I took a couple of deep breaths. The air surrounding Genesis had never felt so sweet. Or maybe I’d grown tired of the staleness in Tia’s tent.
“Everything okay?”
I looked up at Glen. Forcing myself to smile, I shifted my weight from one foot to the other.
“Great. Just visiting with your adorable son, Nero.”
His face lit up as if I’d told him Armageddon had never happened and that we would be living what had been normal lives, ones where we wouldn’t have to kill anything.
“He is, isn’t it? I’m sorry I missed you.”
Glen had been horribly mean to me when we were in school but ever since he and Tia had fallen in love he’d tried to be my good friend.
“Well, I’ve got to go. Keith is expecting me.”
“Yeah.” He nodded. “Thanks for coming by, Rachel. I know Tia misses you.”
She’d just told me how glad she was to not be me. Did Glen know his wife at all? He lied to her every day. She had no idea what he did when he participated in our uprising. What kind of relationship did they have?
“I miss her, too.”
I did. Tears swam in my eyes as I moved away. But not the Tia of now. The Tia who had been the only friend I’d had when I had been the girl who didn’t live in the Warrior housing area because my father had betrayed everyone. The Tia who had invited me into her family because I had none of my own. The Tia who had always been on my side.
“Ms. Clancy.”
I jumped. I hadn’t heard anyone walk up next to me, which just showed how completely self-absorbed I’d gotten.
Blinking against the glare off the mid-day sun I saw that it was the Turtle himself.
Um. I took a step back. What did the president of Genesis want with me?
“Mr. Trumpest.” I nodded, my arm burning underneath the bandage I hid beneath my clothes. “I’m sorry I didn’t see you. I must have been lost in my own thoughts.”
“I certainly didn’t mean to startle you, Rachel.”
Okay. Now we were, apparently, on a first name basis. Adults did that all the time. I had to be respectful with them. The fact that they’d managed not to die made them more important than me.
“What can I do for you?” The way he looked at me should be a crime.
“I’ve been walking around here, thinking.”
Did he have a point?
“I get my best ideas walking. For example, I can’t stop thinking about the new people we’ve just picked up. You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? The refugees from that vampire lair.”
“I’ve heard about it.” I didn’t like the direction of this conversation, not one little bit. I kicked the dirt next to me with the tip of my shoe. “Haven’t seen any of the people though. It’s not really within my realm, if you know what I mean.”
“I do.” He put his hands on his hips, his eyes roaming the length of my body. “We all have our roles to play. Yours is to be a Warrior, to learn the ropes. Keith thinks you’re going to be the next leader, the one who handles things in this strange world we live in. My job is to handle all the other things.”
He’d tracked me down to give me a civics lesson? “Yes, sir. I know that.”
I pulled out the sir on purpose. Maybe the Turtle needed to be reminded of my young age. So he would stop staring at me like he wished me naked.
“One of the things I have to do now and for the foreseeable future is figure out how we are going to house and feed these people. They need medical care. I don’t know if all of them will make it.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.” I really was. Maybe if we had gotten to them faster, they would have been healthier. Maybe….
“I’m sure you are. We have a limited food supply. Our farming is designed to produce a certain amount of food to handle a certain amount of people.”
There had to be a solution. Open space surrounded us on all sides. Certainly, Genesis had room to expand. “Maybe if, when they’re healthy enough, we trained them to work on the farms, food production would increase.”
He grinned, and I noticed that his front tooth lay crooked. I don’t know why I focused on that detail with everything going on. I stared at it, unable to shift my gaze.
“Maybe. I guess what I’m trying to say, Rachel, is that it would be really…difficult for all of us if this kept happening. Do you understand?”
I swallowed. Oh yes, I understood him. Not that I was going to tell him that. “I’m not sure, sir. Why are you talking to me about this? I haven’t even met the refugees. I’m sure Keith or Patrick would be better at handling whatever is going on.”
“Perhaps.” He nodded, his gaze traveling my body again. “Or maybe I’m talking to exactly the right person. We shall see, I suppose.”
“All right.”
I’d wandered the world alone, traveled in the woods with only the sun and stars as my guide. Yet, standing in the middle of Genesis with tents no more than fifty feet away from me, I felt completely alone. Worse than that, the Turtle made me feel vulnerable.
“Well, Keith is expecting me. I have to go.” I turned on my heel and walked fast without breaking into a run. I wouldn’t give him a satisfaction.
Using only the sheer force of my own will, I made myself concentrate of the feel of the wind on my face, the sounds of birds in the trees, and the far-off laughter of children from somewhere in the little area we called town square.
The closer I got to Keith and Tiffani’s tent, the louder baby Levi’s cries became to me. I gritted my teeth as I entered the tent.
“Hello?”
“Rachel.” Tiffani whirled around, Levi positioned on her shoulder. “Sweetheart, how long have you been out there? I’m sorry I didn’t hear you. Little man here is teething and so unhappy. Keith got called to a council meeting about this refugee craziness.”
“Oh yes?” I stayed put. “He asked me to stop by for a visit today. I’m sorry to bug you. I can leave.” Please don’t make me leave and go back outside where the Turtle looks at me with such malice.
She waved her hand in the air. “Don’t be silly. Come in. Levi will be better if you stay. Different stimulation will distract him for a while. I’d be glad for company other than Keith.”
I wasn’t sure how she had managed to make her tent so homey while mine still remained so dank.
“Can you give him anything for the pain?” I walked over to where Tiffani stood with Levi.
He looked so much like his father it was uncanny. His birth had almost killed his mother until Jason’s dad had stepped in and saved her. Everyone held Tiffani in so much regard; Andon’s aid had gone a long way to garner the wolves a lot of good will.
“No. All of our medical supplies are being used right now for the new people. Poor souls. They’re in such bad shape. It’s amazing any of them live past childhood in those conditions.”
I sat down next to her on a small chair that had a soft peach cushion attached to it. Any niceties we had, we made, so I knew Tiffani must have created the pillow since I Keith didn’t sew.
“Deacon says the conditions only get that bad when they’re getting ready to dispose of you. Humans don’t live well down there, but they live better than our new members must have.”
I continued making sure I didn’t tell Tiffani the truth that I’d seen the refugees’ conditions first-hand. “When I lived in the mines for a short period of time it was really, really bad.”
She nodded. “I’m so sorry you went through that.”
I never know quite what to do with kindness. Shifting in my seat, I stared at the back of Levi’s head as she stroked it gently. Had my mother held me like that? Had I been that safe and secure in her arms?
Swallowing away unwanted emotions, I glanced away. Tiffani loved Levi so much. Surely, even if she died today, he’d still feel her love for him somewhere inside of himself forever. Even if he didn’t know what it was, there would have to be a place where he tucked away those feelings of security and adoration.
Maybe even my mother hadn’t held me close enough because she didn’t exist inside of me anywhere I searched. It was more like I’d never had a mother.
Chapter Six
“Jason.” I leaned into him needing his warmth to bring me out of the cold I had encountered everywhere I’d gone. “Please don’t do this.”
It took a lot for me to utter those words. I tried so hard to not be needy and it drove Jason slightly crazy. Still, I would do anything to make him not leave, even expose my wounded soul to him, which I never did because I didn’t want to be vulnerable, not even to him.
“You know I have to.” He stroked the back of my hair, his head pressed down on mine. “But it’s only temporary, and then I’ll be back.”
The scene in front of me seemed so final. I still didn’t know where they were going or why they had to leave so suddenly. I hadn’t asked because I suspected if I questioned Jason the replies would be: Dad hasn’t told us, and because Dad said so. I really couldn’t stand those kinds of replies. It basically made me want to hurl a heavy object at his head.
“There’s nothing temporary about this. If you leave, this will be all that we have. You coming and going. Always saying goodbye.”
He nodded. Jason was an optimist but not a fool. He had to know what I said was true. “Unless—”
I interrupted. “There is no unless. I cannot live with your father, ever. So even if I leave here and never come back, I won’t be with him.”
He sighed, kissing my head. “Then I guess we’ll get really good at saying goodbye. But, I’d rather have a bit of Rachel than no Rachel.”
I closed my eyes to stop the tears. Not that the action would fool Jason. He’d probably smelled them before I even knew they were coming.
“None of that.” He kissed my hair again.
I opened my lids and took a step away from him. “If we were sleeping together, would you stay? Would you find a way then?”
The real question was if he said yes, would I give in to the almost constant temptation just to make him remain? I didn’t know the answer to that, and I didn’t like myself for not knowing. A person should always know just how low they are capable of going. If there is no bottom to my moral scale, I needed to understand that about myself.
“No.” He shook his head. “That’s got nothing to do with this. Are you worried about that? Do you think I’m leaving because you’re not ready yet?”
“No.” Because Jason would always be a better person than me. Even if he was a wolf, and I was a human.
“Jason.” Andon’s voice made me jump. I shouldn’t be surprised to see him. Maybe I’d been in denial, thinking I wouldn’t have to speak to him. “Can I have a word with Rachel?”
I groaned loudly. “I think the person to ask that question to would be me, don’t you think?”
Andon didn’t acknowledge my remark but kept his gaze firmly on Jason. His son had the audacity to nod his permission. I pulled completely away from him, wanting to scream but somehow holding on to the small amount of composure I had left.
“Jason doesn’t decide whom I speak to. You both need to grasp that.”
My boyfriend’s eyes implored me to behave. “I know that. I love you. Don’t you think I know that? But things are different with my father.”
I held up my hand to stop him. “What do you want, Andon?”
Perhaps I should have called him Dr. Kenwood to put more distance between us. Or maybe I’d been perfect in using his first name to be really rude.
“I’d like to speak to you alone.”
“There’s nothing you can say to me that I won’t repeat to Jason. You might as well say it in front of him.”
The Warrior - Initiation Driven Subversive Redemption Justice Page 46
