Walking Among the Shadows: Awakening: Revised Edition

by Navi' Robins

“I’m fine.”

  “You sure? I can have one of my associates get you a glass of water or aspirin?”

  “No, I’m fine. Your associates don’t have to get me anything.”

  “You seem a little on edge and annoyed, Aiden.”

  “Really? Do I? Well, I do have a killer hangover and the cold breeze blowing in because the front door is wide open really isn’t helping my mood.”

  “No one twisted your arm to involve yourself in underage drinking.”

  “No, they didn’t…you are so right…but that doesn’t change the fact I have a hangover.”

  “Young man I don’t have any empathy towards your current mental state because your irresponsibility led you down this road.”

  I could see that this back and forth show with Agent Smith was not going in my favor and no matter what I said I couldn’t aggravate him. He was calm and calculating, never rattled or taken off his square. This guy was really good.

  “So, what now?”

  “We need to figure out your whereabouts and if you had anything to do with the victim’s demise.”

  “Why would I have anything to do with that?”

  “The last person upset with him and threatened him was…well…you, in fact. And it just so happens that you threatened to break his neck. Being that we found him with a broken neck, and me being the investigator I am, I decided, ‘hey, why not go ask the out-of-control teenager a few questions and see where that leads!’”

  His sarcastic tone and smug attitude was really getting to me and I wished I could just dropkick those glasses and that smirk right off his face.

  “Threatening people isn’t a crime, is it? I was angry because of the crappy call he made.”

  “Yes, we could see that. But threatening someone can be constituted as a crime…just for future reference.”

  Right at that moment I had an epiphany and decided to use my newfound wisdom to get me out of this mess.

  “Really? So that means the threat you made to me at the game was a crime?”

  “Wait!” my mom interjected. “You questioned my son at the game without my authority? And you threatened him?”

  “Ma’am, it wasn’t really a threat…my team and I stepped in when your son had the referee cornered in the stands and we wanted to prevent a situation.”

  “Yeah, true,” I said, “but your comment had nothing to do with the ref. You told me you knew I had something to do with Steve’s death and soon I would be the property of the federal government.”

  “What the hell!” I could see my revelation was making my mom extremely upset and Agent Smith very uneasy. Jackpot! Now I could ride this wave all the way to shore because I was drowning going back in forth with Agent Smith.

  “Your threat drove me to drink because I had no idea why you would think I had something to do with his death. I thought Steve died of a heart attack or something.”

  “I thought so, too, son,” my mom agreed. “So are you saying my son murders people by giving them heart attacks?”

  “No, ma’am, your son is twisting things. You can’t see what he’s doing because you are too close to the situation.”

  “First of all, Agent, I willingly allowed you and the officers in my home and at this point I am willingly kicking you the hell out of my house. You are not to speak to my son or threaten him without my consent and I wouldn’t give either to the likes of you.”

  “It was so much pressure, Mom, and I couldn’t take it! I needed to forget the visuals he put in my head about the things the government would do to me when they arrest me and throw me in jail,” I whined.

  I was laying it on thick now, and my mom was eating it up like Ms. Pac-Man.

  “Wait, did you tell my son he would be thrown in jail?”

  “Not exactly but…”

  “But what? You alluded to it?”

  “Something like that, ma’am, but I was really trying to…”

  “Okay, that’s it. Elude your asses out of my house right now!”

  “Mrs. Storm, you are making a big mistake.”

  “A mistake for protecting my son?” she interrupted. “Agent, I am asking you and your team to leave my home and property at once. If you need any additional information concerning my son’s whereabouts or statements, we can arrange for my lawyer to contact your office. But at this juncture you are not allowed to directly communicate with my son going forward. Until you have a warrant or some other paperwork, you are also not allowed at my home. Good evening, gentlemen. Now get out!”

  My mom cleared the entire living room in less than five minutes. As Agent Smith was walking out the door I could see he was upset at how things played out. He turned and looked at me, shaking his head and I just gave him a huge smile and a thumbs up.

  As he walked out the door, I walked over and slammed the door behind his back and whispered, “Bitch” when the door closed. I peered through the peephole to see his reaction and to my surprise he was peering through the peephole as well. Seeing him that close startled me and I jumped back. He turned towards the street and walked away laughing. How did he know I was looking through the peephole and better yet how did he know I was startled by it? Before I could try and figure it out I felt two sets of eyes staring down my back, burning a hole through my shirt and the back of my head. I slowly turned to see looks of disgust from Sarah and rage from my mom.

  “Aiden, in the office now!” my mom demanded.

  I don’t think I’ve ever gotten an ass-chewing like the one my mom gave me that evening. She was so angry I thought she might get “old school” on me and get a belt or something….she was that mad. Of course the conclusion was punishment, no car, no fun, no TV, no video games, and kitchen-cleaning detail until further notice. My mom didn’t even consider that I would be guilty of murder, but she did know I was out drinking and driving until I passed out.

  Something she would not tolerate. I really hated disappointing her, but it’s like my life was spiraling out of control and no matter how much I tried to hold onto the boy I was, he kept slipping through my fingers, and at this point I didn’t know how much of the old Aiden was left. And to be honest I really didn’t miss him. The old Aiden would have pissed his pants at the very idea of being questioned by an FBI agent. With all my martial arts skills and physical ability I was soft and timid; a soupy kind of dude, and after getting a taste of the new and more aggressive Aiden, I had come to realize just how lame I used to be. I just wished this new Aiden wasn’t a possible serial killer but only a social badass. But I guess you can’t have summer without a bitter winter….

  The referee’s murder was all over the news that evening and I could hear my mom watching the news in her bedroom. His name was Mark Humpton. Father of two and alumni of the school that beat us…well technically beat us, because in reality they lost. But that was all I could make out. Now I understood why he would cheat for them, but it wasn’t an excuse I was willing to accept. But was I so angry to actually break his neck? I was angry, and if I had caught him I wanted to give him a good pounding with my helmet, but would I have done that? No, not likely but drunk on my ass…no telling what I was capable of. I tried to convince myself that I didn’t kill him, but without much information I wasn’t convinced, and if I was guilty of murdering the ref, then why not Steve?

  He did have something I wanted, and short of a career-ending injury or death he wasn’t going to give it up without a fight. That night I didn’t get much sleep because I was sure word would get out soon enough that I was a prime suspect in his murder and I couldn’t blame anyone for suspecting me, judging by my behavior at the game. I mean, who does that? Run down a referee with intentions to helmet-pound him into the ground? Damn, I was getting out of control.

  The next morning Sarah was in the family room watching TV when a breaking news report came on. It seemed that there were multiple recordings of the game and from all angles it was clear that I caught the ball. Even though I wasn’t allowed to watch TV, and Sarah was warning me, I j
ust waved her off; I needed to see this. The news speculated that it was an angry fan who was distraught about his call, but I wasn’t implicated in his murder. Another video came on and to my surprise someone was recording the altercation between me and the ref, and they recorded him telling me that he had in fact cheated. The audio was clear, and the video was crystal clear. It must have been one of the kids sitting right where we were standing when he made that comment to me. No video of me chasing him, just us standing shoulder to shoulder and him making that comment about the reality of the world and us losing in it. Watching it again angered me further so I decided to walk away from the TV before I blew another fuse. I walked away just in time because my mom walked in at that very moment asking what we were doing. We lived in the age of YouTube and online catalogs of everything people did in their lives, and before today I hated it. Now I was a fan and contemplating getting me a YouTube account as well. Go figure, right?

  At school that afternoon the coach had a meeting with the team and then had a private sit-down with me. He just stared at me for about a minute and then said,

  “Well, I guess you’ll be playing for the rest of the season. It’s horrible how it played out, but we have to move on from this past weekend and try to piece together acceptable behavior regardless of the situation.

  You can’t flip out every time something doesn’t go your way, Aiden. Life is full of disappointments and if you can’t handle them you will never mature. You will be like these idiots who refuse to let go of the past and find themselves left behind.”

  He said he saw great potential in me and that I was destined for great things, but that same potential unrealized and misguided could also lead me destined for horrible things. He said there was a fine line between being famous or infamous. It really was a lot to think about, but the coach was genuinely concerned and I respected that. So I told him I would behave better and actually intended to do so. I wanted to confide in him about the six agents who were basically stalking me, but I felt it was better for his own safety to keep him out of it. The last time I confided in someone about this darkness inside me it didn’t turn out well.

  Over the next few days, things were still very tense and uncertain around the school. Several law enforcement agencies came to our school to talk about the recent deaths and how we should govern ourselves when walking home from school. The days were getting shorter during the winter months, and soon for most of us, going home after school would be a trip mostly done in darkness. So they gave us the whole “travel in groups” speech and also encouraged us to catch a ride with family or friends we knew well instead of walking home. It should have been just the standard safety presentation, but the six suits were present at all of the presentations. Never sitting in front with the rest of the presenters, but strategically seated around the students in the auditorium; two on the left, two on the right, and two at the very back of the auditorium. No one seemed to notice them or be bothered by their presence but myself. I knew why they were there and for whom.

  I would notice them in different places around Deerfield too, just sitting there, watching and waiting for me to slip up and make a mistake so they can pounce on their prey. Sometimes I swear they would even be sitting on the bus coming home from school and again no one noticed them being there but me…all six of them seated similarly as they were seated at the auditorium. It was extremely odd and intimidating. I would wonder what strategic purpose did that seating arrangement have? Did it help them survey their surroundings better? Did it cut off all exits I might try to use? I just couldn’t figure it out and why no one other than myself noticed it. Of course I wasn’t going to mention it to Sarah or anyone else because that would open another conversation that I wasn’t willing to delve into.

  Jason came over the following Friday with Chicago Bears tickets in hand. They were owner’s box tickets! Jason knew a lot of wealthy and powerful people and great seats to all the sporting events was one of the many perks he enjoyed because of the circles he traveled in . Of course, my mom protested because at that moment I was still on punishment, and after bringing Jason up to speed on the events that transpired the previous weekend, he seemed pretty bummed about the idea of me not going to the game. But again Jason, having the uncanny ability to get people to respond to his wishes, convinced my mom and she allowed me to go. After that, Jason would come every weekend with tickets to a sports game. Sometimes it would be all of us and other times just me and him. Jason was known by so many people, that going places with him was like being in the president’s entourage. Special treatment, exclusive access to locker rooms, etc.; nothing was too exclusive when it came to Jason.

  During the times it was just the two of us, I found myself bonding with him more, talking about my newfound aggression and insecurities on controlling my emotions during the games. His advice was priceless and he always made sense of my insecurities. Speaking with him and watching the games helped me become a much better football player and gave me the confidence to control my emotions during difficult situations. It was like the more time I spent with Jason, the less time I thought about my dark secret. These times were a much-needed vacation from the day-to-day battles I fought trying to keep my dark impulses at bay. Being around him became like a drug habit to me, and I found myself looking to him for emotional support as well as mental stability.

  I never thought that I would bond with another man who wasn’t my father, but Jason made it difficult not to become attached to him. I wasn’t alone; Sarah also was attached and we trusted him to the point that spending the entire weekend at our house wasn’t something that made us uncomfortable. In fact, if he didn’t spend the weekend with us, we would get upset. He was definitely becoming a huge part of our family and we were happy to have him.

  What was also strange was the closer I got to Jason, the less I saw of Jasmine, and even when I did see her I didn’t have the same reactions I did before. It was like Jason was giving me a protective shield that kept Jasmine and the effect she had on me at bay. At first I would still get that evil smirk, but then when she saw I wasn’t reacting the way I did before, she would just walk away. After a while she would avoid eye contact with me completely. With that behind me, my confidence soared, and my performances on the football field became a thing of legend. I was averaging over 250 yards a game, rushing and receiving, and the Deerfield Warriors had eleven wins and one loss and were well on our way to the state championship and hopefully bring home the title.

  The coverage I got from reporters and sports broadcasters made me a household name and by midseason I had several top-tier college programs interested in giving me a full scholarship. It was a great time in my life, and I was enjoying all the perks that came with being so popular. Brian also gained a lot of exposure and he was offered several full scholarships as well from top-tier college programs. Brian and I became good friends and we hung out regularly. He was a lot of fun to be around, but fun with Brian wasn’t the same as it was with Tony. I would see Tony still up to his old antics with the ladies from time to time, but we wouldn’t speak.

  We would acknowledge each other and break eye contact immediately. The bad thing about hanging with Brian was that he was kind of irresponsible and always found himself in some bad situations. He drank too much for a teenager and had too many girls coming in and out of his bedroom. Tony was a player, too, but somehow he handled his dealings with tact and poise. Brian was just all over the place. When he was drunk he didn’t care how cute, fat, or ugly a girl was; if she was ready and willing, he was game.

  Sometimes he would be so drunk he wouldn’t even remember what girl it was, and the next day at school he would be completely clueless why this ugly, fat girl was all over him in front of the whole school. Some of the team would gossip about his dad being the same way and his mom being a walking shell after taking so much from his dad. Watching his parents carry on the way they did made Brian the person he was, and nothing any of us said could change that. On the field he was a beast,
but off the field he was a problem.

  After that whole fiasco with the ref getting killed and me blacking out from drinking, you would think I would decide to stay away from alcohol for a while. But, just like most teenagers, I would succumb to peer pressure and find myself drinking again. Each time I would drink I would black out. Sometimes I would wake up the next morning with no incident. But other times I would wake up standing in the middle of Jasmine’s bedroom, and other times I would be standing directly over her while she slept. Needless to say, those nights were not the best for me trying to get out of that house without waking anyone or setting off alarms.

  If it hadn’t been for those situations I would have totally forgotten about my dark desires towards Jasmine; but every now and again things like that would remind me that even though the darkness was asleep it was still there, waiting for the right moment to take over. You would believe a thinking person would just remove alcohol from the equation, right? Problem solved, but not me, because I loved the way I felt when I would drink; it was like all my inhibitions were taken away and I felt free to do whatever my teenage heart desired.

  After weeks of hype the Deerfield Warriors were heading to the state championship to face the only team that beat us earlier in the season. It was going to be a hard-fought battle and hopefully this time we wouldn’t have another referee making erroneous calls in favor of the other team.

  Almost the entire suburb of Deerfield was going to Soldier’s Field to watch the game. It was going to be televised on ESPN 2 which would give us more exposure. I was excited and scared at the same time. This was a big deal, and the last thing I needed was any distractions that would take my mind away from the game. Coach took us all out for dinner the night before and told us how proud he was of us and the season we had. He talked about winning and how it was not always about winning. At that point, I kind of tuned him out when he started talking about “it’s not always about winning,” because I knew better than that. It was always about winning; only those used to and accepting of losing said “it’s not always about winning.”