“Hell no. That was heaven . . .”
25. IMPOSSIBLE SPEECH
Kane
I couldn’t say it. It was like every time I tried, my throat would close up, not letting those three words escape from the furthest depths of my soul. I had wanted to tell her when I first opened the door that evening. I wanted to tell her when we were sitting at the piano. I wanted to tell her before I covered her, and let her consume me.
But I couldn’t. And I had no idea why.
And yet I knew it wasn’t because I didn’t truly feel it. I loved her, I could tell every time I looked at her, every time I kissed those damn lips, every time my hands ghosted over her smooth skin, and every time her silvery gray eyes locked with my own. It tugged at my insides and twisted beautifully inside me sharper than a damn razor. Internally I screamed it. Every second I spent with her, every time her light laugh rang in my ears. Every time I heard her lips part allowing a moan to escape and swirl in the air, flying around my very being.
But I couldn’t tell her.
It had been two weeks since she had shown up at my front door. Afterwards we had just stayed in my bed. I was still overwhelmed at how different she felt to me, and how completely taken I had become with her. Being with her was the best thing in this universe, and I reminded her every damn day.
And now, two weeks later my life had started to gain some light. A light which I was holding onto for dear life, clinging to its thin thread, begging not to slip and float back into the darkness. I had tried persuading my mom to go to AA meetings and sort herself the hell out. Of course she had rejected the idea, and every day I gave her other options, finally pulling out the big guns and bringing social services into our home. I forced her to sit down, pulling a sobbing Ashley into my lap, murmuring into her ear to keep her eye on Mom and not break contact. In the end Ashley’s tears and her wide sad eyes, which could tear even the most grown man in two, had broken Mom down, and she agreed to counseling.
So, every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, Mom’s counselor came to our home, talking to her for an hour. It usually involved a lot of crying and angry outbursts on Mom’s part, and she would always be moody once the counselor left, but surprisingly, she refused to drown her sorrows with drink. And for that I was proud of her, and I told her. Every day.
It was a Thursday, and the doorbell rang, signaling that Aimee, Mom’s counselor, was here. I threw on a loose pair of pants and chucked my towel around my neck, jogging down the stairs and pulling the door open.
“Hey, Kane,” she greeted me sweetly, and I smirked as her light blue eyes raked over my half-naked form.
As a guy I had to appreciate Aimee’s looks. I would be lying if I said she wasn’t hot. She was dressed in a tight black pencil skirt which reached just above the knees, and a tight white collared shirt, the top two buttons undone, revealing a black camisole underneath. Her blonde hair was in a ponytail on the left side of her shoulder, and her ridiculously high black heels brought her almost level with me.
Yeah, she was hot alright, and I was pretty sure she knew it too, but I wasn’t interested—another factor which just proved I loved Suranne. Prior to Suranne entering my life, the only thought in my mind would’ve been taking this blonde upstairs. But now, every time she greeted me and gave me that cocky smirk and a raise of her neat, thin eyebrow, I just wanted to go see Suranne. To feel her wavy mahogany hair and wrap my arms around her tiny waist and just kiss the hell out of her, which is what I usually did whenever Aimee came over.
“Hey Aim’s,” I smirked and stood to the side, gesturing for her to come in. I chuckled under my breath as she slowly brushed past me, and walked towards the living room, making effort to sway her hips in that tiny-ass skirt.
I sighed and shook my head lightly, following after her and kissing Mom on the cheek briefly.
“I’ll be back later tonight, Mom. Keep up the good work, I’m proud of you,” I murmured to her softly and she smiled back at me. Her eyes, the same color as mine, were clear and hopeful, no longer poisoned by alcohol.
“I hope you bring her home at some point, Kane. Your sister and I would like to meet this infamous lady,” she scolded and I couldn’t help but grin at her. If only she knew how many times I had brought Suranne home.
“Soon,” I assured her, dashing up the stairs to grab a black cotton T-shirt from my room. Pulling it over my still damp hair, I hustled back down the stairs, called out a swift “bye,” and headed for my car. I sighed and turned the ignition, always getting a tiny thrill at the purr of my engine. I loved my car.
Pulling out of the drive, I wove through the streets, putting the gear in neutral as I got caught at a stop light. I drummed my fingers on the wheel, waiting for it to turn green and felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. I retrieved it, reading the latest text.
Where are you?
I smirked and tapped in my reply.
I’M ON MY WAY, SOMEONE’S EAGER HUH?
My phone signalled a new text within seconds.
Whatever, just hurry up
I chuckled as my fingers worked over the buttons.
I KNOW U WANT MORE BABY, DON’T GOTTA LIE
Like the last, the reply was immediate.
You wish lol. My aunt just left. Hurry the bloody hell up!
I smiled, shaking my head. She knew I loved it when she got all feisty and shit. Someone honked their horn from behind, shouting at me to move my car, and I realized the light had changed. I pulled away and sped the rest of the way there. As soon as I pulled up to her aunt’s house and got out of my car she was out the door and running at me, jumping into my arms with such force that she knocked me back against the side of my car.
“Hey,” I laughed, wrapping my arms tightly around her waist making sure she didn’t fall.
“Hey,” she breathed against my neck. I smiled as her soft voice washed away everything around us. It was just Suranne and me. “I missed you,” she murmured as she lifted her head and locked her eyes with mine.
Those damn eyes.
I smirked and leaned forward, softly pressing my lips against hers.
“You only saw me like three hours ago at school,” I whispered against her lips and she hummed, tightening her arms around my neck, pulling my bottom lip between her teeth, which of course made me groan. She knew I dug that shit.
“Didn’t you miss me, too?” she pouted up at me, her eyes all wide and sad. I felt her expression tugging at my heart and narrowed my eyes at her. She really knew how to get to me. I exhaled a shaky breath and could see her lips twitching into a smirk—she knowing she had me but was trying her hardest to keep her composure.
“Don’t give me that look, Suranne. You know I missed the hell outta you,” I muttered, raising an eyebrow as she grinned and pressed her lips softly to mine. I brushed my tongue across her lower lip and she sighed, opening her mouth to me, causing me to hum in approval. Our tongues swirled as she laced her fingers in my hair and massaged lightly. It felt so good that I nearly purred like a damn cat. I groaned into her mouth as my jeans became uncomfortable and I pulled away, gasping for air as I lowered my lips to her ear.
“I want you.”
She giggled and sighed as I carried on kissing her neck.
“Wasn’t yesterday enough?” she breathed, tilting her head, giving me better access to her neck and gripping my hair tightly. I smirked and pulled away, pecking her on the lips once, softly.
“I’m whipped, what can I say?” I shrugged lightly. It was true—every free moment I had with Suranne, I wanted her. Every time we spoke on the phone, I wanted her. When we had separate classes at school, I wanted her. Hell, I wanted her even when I had her.
She tightened her legs around my waist, smirking as I dropped my head to her shoulder.
“Hmmm,” she hummed and kissed down my jaw line before unlocking her tight grasp around me and sliding her legs back down to the ground. I sighed and closed my eyes tightly. She was such a tease.
“Now look what you
did.” Gesturing to my pants, I tilted my head at her, shaking it mockingly. “What are you gonna do about it, baby?” I stalked toward her slowly as she backed away from me toward her front door.
“Nothing,” she smirked back.
“Really?” I raised an eyebrow, taking another step forward as she took another step back. I lowered my voice as I got closer. “That isn’t what you said to me last night, Suranne. In fact, I remember you begging,” I spoke roughly and flicked my tongue against my lower lip as my eyes raked over her body.
She blushed and averted her gaze to the sidewalk, carrying on with backward steps as I got closer and closer. I chuckled at the redness of her cheeks, amazed at how she could suddenly change into someone timid and shy.
“Kane . . .” she breathed coyly and I closed my eyes, groaning at how her soft voice, thick with her British accent, sent a shiver ripping through my body.
“Yeah?” I choked, eyes still closed as I heard her back coming into contact with the front door. I took two more steps towards her and let her scent swallow me whole.
“We have to go,” she breathed heavily against me, and I nuzzled her neck, dragging my nose in a line up to her ear. “Not yet,” I whined softly, inhaling her irresistible scent. I placed my hand on her hips and massaged the skin there, the warmth of her body burning through my fingertips and I sighed into her neck. I felt like I just wanted to burrow up inside of her and never leave.
“Kane, as much as I would like to pull you into my now empty home, and have my wicked way, we have a certain someone to pick up,” she sighed, her body completely contradicting her words as she pushed herself against me.
“She doesn’t finish for another twenty minutes,” I mumbled, as my hands continued their journey over her hips, brushing her stomach lightly and sliding up towards the underside of her breasts.
I loved those damn things.
“Kane,” she warned, and I sighed pulling away and frowning like a little kid, unable to help myself. I wanted her and she was leaving me hanging. I felt like stomping my foot.
She rolled her eyes and leaned up on her toes, brushing her lips against mine but I stood my ground, lips firmly closed, and arms folded over my chest. With a sigh she wrapped her arms around my neck, mewling at my lack of reaction which, of course, broke me down and I ended up winding my arms around her, cradling her tightly and kissing her softly.
She laughed against my lips, the sound automatically warming me and making me smile like some goofy-ass moron.
“OK, we really should go, I’m kinda nervous.”
My face became serious and I pulled away, frowning down at her questioningly. “Why would you be nervous? She’s just my sister.”
She averted her gaze and shrugged, biting her lip nervously. “Yeah, I know but. . . what if she doesn’t like me?” she murmured. I gazed at her softly, opening my mouth to say those three damn words that I wanted to tell her so badly.
But all that came out was an empty, gusty sigh.
I took her hand gently in mine and gave her a sad smile, my mind still angry that my mouth just wasn’t working. I pressed my lips very lightly to her forehead.
“Come on baby, you’ll be fine,” I said reassuringly, my mind knowing that Ashley would love the crap outta her.
Just as much as I did.
26. FROM NERVOUSNESS TO HAPPINESS
Suranne
“Kane, I’m not so sure about this,” I murmured. We were in the parking lot of Kane’s sister’s school. He was leaning against the side of his car and he had placed his hands on my hips and pulled me flush against him, so that my back was to his chest, his long, toned arms were wrapped around my waist, and his chin rested on my shoulder.
“Quit being a wuss,” he mumbled against my shoulder, lifting his head and placing a quick kiss there before resting his chin back against it. The light stubble tickled my skin deliciously and I shuddered as he turned his head and nuzzled my neck.
“But you said how close you two were; won’t she be a bit . . . protective?” I wasn’t sure why I was so scared of a twelve-year-old girl, but I didn’t want her to feel threatened by me; especially after losing her father, I didn’t want her to think she would be losing her brother as well.
Kane sighed and squeezed his arms around me as he peppered subtle kisses against my neck and across my shoulder.
“Suranne, you’re all she ever talks about. She was the one who kept nagging me to bring you here in the first place. Quit bitchin’, baby.”
“I’m not bitchin’,” I grumbled back at him and went to release his grip, but he laughed and shook his head.
“Wooah, no you don’t,” he laughed, pulling me back against his chest and holding me firmly against him. “You ain’t goin’ nowhere. And you know you were bitchin’,” he mumbled into my neck. I felt him inhale as he dragged his nose up my jugular and pressed a soft kiss just below my ear.
“Are you sniffing me?” I asked, my voice feigning shock.
He hummed and carried on his attack on my neck. Occasionally I felt his tongue dart out. “Can’t help it. You smell too good,” he muttered and I craned my neck, twisting my head so I could kiss him. I was about to turn around so I could wrap my arms around his neck when I heard someone call out to us.
“Kaanne!”
Kane grunted, pulled away abruptly and cursed under his breath as he released his arms from around my waist and peered around the lot, trying to decipher where the voice, which I assumed belonged to his sister, had come from.
He quickly kissed my cheek and I watched nervously as he jogged off towards a petite girl carrying what looked to be a heavy backpack on her shoulder. She had her brown hair up in a loose ponytail that bounced against her shoulder as she walked towards Kane. I watched as he mussed her hair and she slapped him. I couldn’t help but smile as he grabbed her from behind and tickled her torso, causing her to drop her bag as she squealed and tried to slap his hands away.
He stopped his attack on the poor girl, but stayed crouched behind her, his arms wrapping around her small waist as she stood between his legs and he whispered something in her ear. Their eyes darted to me as he continued speaking to her softly. I felt my stomach flutter with nerves as she twisted her head and asked him something.
God, what was he saying to her? After he nodded, she turned back to me, her lips curving up into a wide smile as Kane released his grip. She came running up to me and I fidgeted with my hands as she got closer.
“Hey, Suranne,” she breathed, energetically. I looked closely at her face and couldn’t help but smile at the similarities between her and Kane. She had the same large brown eyes and the same cute crinkles at the side of her eyes when she smiled. Small freckles dotted her nose and I felt my lips smile back.
“Hey, Ashley, your brother tells me a lot about you,” I murmured gently, watching as her eyes gleamed when I mentioned Kane. She continued smiling and twisted her head to look over her shoulder at Kane, who was slowly walking towards us with Ashley’s backpack in his hand.
She turned back to me and leaned in close to my ear. “Kane talks a lot about you, too,” she whispered and I laughed softly. Kane peered at us suspiciously, his eyes narrowing as he stopped in front of us. “What are you two talking about?” he asked firmly, but I saw his eyes light up with amusement as he gazed at us.
With a casual shrug I looked down at Ashley and winked, then I looked up at Kane.
“Nothing. Nothing at all.”
I heard Ashley breathe a quiet laugh and Kane cocked an eyebrow up at me disbelievingly, to which I smirked in response.
“Whatever,” he replied nonchalantly and opened the back door to let Ashley get in. “Come on dipshit, time to go home,” he went to muss her hair again but she stamped on his foot just before jumping in the car and shutting the door so Kane couldn’t get her back.
I laughed vindictively and his head snapped towards me.
“You think that’s funny, huh?” he asked roughly, his gaze intense.
“Yes,” I smirked back. He stalked slowly towards me, his eyes dark. He placed his hand on my hip and ducked his head so that his lips were close to my ear.
“Don’t think I won’t get you back. We’ll see who’s laughing later on.” He breathed raggedly in my ear before he gently tugged at my lobe with his teeth. My breathing hitched and just as I was about to place my hands on his chest he pulled away and walked around to his side of the car, leaving me standing there breathing heavily, my mind in a daze.
I glanced in the back window and saw Ashley smirking up at me, looking exactly like her brother when he did that. I smiled back at her and cleared my throat, getting in the car.
Kane started up the engine and glanced at me quickly, chuckling. I glared at him meaningfully, but he just gave me that special crooked grin, knowing I couldn’t stay angry at him when he did that. My face went soft and he reached for my hand over the console, his chocolate-brown eyes bright and twinkling with an emotion commonly found in other people, but something I had never seen in him before.
I smiled up at him, realising that for the first time in what I was guessing had been three long years, Kane Richards was genuinely happy.
27. DROWNING IN THE BITTER DARKNESS
Kane
“Mr. Richards, if you could be so kind as to concentrate in my class, perhaps you could tell me what x represents on the scatter graph?” Mr. Horgan raised his bushy brows at me and folded his arms as he waited for an answer.
I narrowed my eyes and looked down at the diagram on my desk.
“0.23,” I muttered with a smirk, pretty confident that I had the answer. Bushy Brows nodded curtly, wrote the answer on the board, and then continued to lecture us on some other kind of crap related to math.
Glancing at the clock, I sighed, realizing there were only 10 minutes left till I could leave this damn class, and see her.
Kane Richards Must Die Page 12
