HEADMASTER

by Jaimie Roberts

  “He?” she asks with a gleam in her eye.

  “Yes, he,” I reply back, smirking.

  “Does he at least have a name?”

  “Easton.”

  She frowns. “That’s an unusual name.”

  “That’s what I said to him.” My mum hands me my box, and I take it from her hand.

  “And what did he say to that?”

  “That unusual was his family all over.”

  “Hmm,” she muses. “It sounds as though you had quite a conversation.

  And them some!

  I know my mum’s fishing, but I’m not going to give anything away. Nonchalantly, I shrug it off like it meant nothing—even though it means everything. “It was nothing really. Just a very brief conversation with a guy I met at the bar.”

  She gives me an I’m not buying it look. “Yes, it was so nothing that all of a sudden you now want to go to Edinburgh after a very brief conversation with a man in a pub.”

  Well, when she puts it like that…

  “I suppose it’s just one of those situations where you simply don’t think of an idea until someone brings it up in conversation. Do you see where I’m coming from?” I ask, popping a chicken ball in my mouth.

  “I do,” she replies with that same smirk on her face.

  “Edinburgh is a lot more doable than Tuscany, that’s for sure. Either a very short plane ride or the train would suffice.”

  “Maybe one day.”

  Nodding, I take a sip of my champagne. “Yep. Maybe one day.”

  Dream

  “Eat your food.”

  I stare out of the one tiny window I have in my room. Outside, the sun shines, offering what I can only imagine is a beautiful summer’s day. I don’t know how long I’ve been here. Two, maybe three months. I stopped counting after about five or six weeks. “I don’t want to eat it. I want to go home.”

  Liam visibly sighs his frustration. “I already told you. Your mum’s not home anymore. She died. I just didn’t want you there to deal with all the shit you would have had to put up with afterwards. I’m protecting you.”

  My eyes widen. “By keeping me prisoner?”

  He gives me a sideways glance. “It’s for your own good.” With his hand, he moves closer, and I instinctively move away. He edges forward towards my plate and with a flick of his finger, he pulls up my plate before moving his finger away. It thuds back down onto the tray. “Eat,” he commands again. “You’ve lost too much weight.”

  “What do you expect?” I bite back. “You drugged me, took me here, and now you won’t let me leave. Of course I’m not going to feel like eating.” With an exasperated breath, I ask, “What do you want with me?”

  His hand moves forward again, and I think he’s going to demand I eat again, but instead, he surprises me by stroking my hair. I flinch, pulling away. “I’m not going to hurt you, Ray. All I want to do is take care of you. I’m all you have left.”

  Not wanting to believe him, I say, “My mum is who I have left. She’s all I need.”

  Liam closes his eyes before wiping a bead of sweat from his brow. It’s a hot day today, and the lack of air conditioning is killing me. If it wasn’t for the fact that I have my own bathroom and plenty of water, I’m sure I would have died by now.

  Once he opens his eyes back up, he fixes his cold blue irises on me. I can’t say Liam’s an unattractive man. In fact, when he came into my mother’s life, I was all for them dating. With his megawatt smile, clean-cut image, spiky blond hair, and light blue eyes, he seemed like the perfect gentleman. Mum seemed to be into him, and they were friends for a long time before they started going out. It was just three weeks into that when he took me.

  And I still haven’t found out why.

  “I already told you. Your mum’s dead. She died the day I came to collect you from school. I’m just trying to protect you from dealing with everything that comes after. Wouldn’t you rather be here with me than stuck in some foster home with God only knows who? That’s what would have happened. You’re only fifteen. They would have put you in care.”

  I shake my head. “I need to get out of this room, Liam. It’s driving me crazy.”

  He exhales, offering me a gentle smile. “One day when the dust settles, and the authorities stop looking for you, you can. Until then, I have to keep you safely locked up here. We can’t risk you being caught and taken away from me. I may be all you have left, but you’re all I have left too.” He takes a look around my vast room. “You have everything you need. Books, DVD’s, your favourite music—lots of stuff to keep you entertained. I thought of everything for you.”

  My eyes follow where his go. I may be stuck here, but the room is at least clean and comfortable. It’s big too, but sometimes, I feel like it’s so small that the walls are caving in on me.

  “I know that, but I need fresh air. I’m fifteen, and I’ve done nothing wrong. I should be out at my age—not locked up like I’ve committed a crime.”

  Liam sighs again, his broad shoulders rising and falling. “I understand your frustration, Ray, but I assure you it’s only for a little while longer.” He looks at my pained expression, and his face softens again. “Look, I know how bored you get here. Why don’t you eat your food? It’s your favourite, a Quarter Pounder with cheese from McDonald’s. After you’ve eaten, maybe I can go rent a movie, and we’ll watch it down here together. What do you say?”

  My eyes roam to the burger sitting on the plate and the McDonald’s bag next to it. My stomach starts to growl in anticipation. “Are there chips in there?”

  Liam chuckles. “There certainly are.”

  “Okay,” I reply, leaning forward to grab my plate.

  Grabbing my head, Liam lands a kiss on my temple before getting up. “That’s my girl. I’ll go have a look for some movies while you finish up, okay? I’ll be back soon.”

  All I offer is a nod, but it seems to greatly please him. He turns, walks towards the door, and pulls the handle. Once he walks through, he turns to see me eating the burger. He smiles again. “I’m so glad I found you,” he says before shutting the door. The instant I hear the door bolt, I jump.

  Shooting up in my bed, I gasp and feel as sweat drips down my breast bone. In a panic, my eyes scan the room. I’m home.

  I let out a deep breath, allowing my panic to subside. It was only a dream. I’m not in that room anymore. I’m where I belong. Where I’ve always belonged.

  Tension in my hands causes pins and needles, so I start shaking it out before wiping my hands over my face. It’s still dark in my room, making me wonder what time it is. My eyes glance over to my phone where I light it up. It’s a little after three. In four hours time, I have to get up for school. I groan, settling myself back down onto the pillow. I attempt to shut my eyes, but no matter how much I try to block out the images, Liam is still there, invading my thoughts. I shift, my body heating as I turn over. Already, I’m uncomfortable again, and I’ve only just moved.

  I sigh, turning over yet again and resigning myself to the fact that I won’t be able to get back to sleep tonight. Maybe I should read. It might help. As I stare up at my phone, the green light shines, letting me know it’s fully charged. The thought makes me think about Easton and his text messages. I never did respond. Maybe I will tomorrow. I smile, thinking about our encounter last night. It’s definitely better than those I had with Liam.

  As I go over it all in my head, my eyes begin to droop, and surprisingly enough, I fall asleep after all. What’s not surprising is that I fell asleep with the image of a brooding, intense Scot with the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen foremost in my mind.

  Shock

  Today is D-day, and I’m looking forward to it like a hole in my head. For me, it’s a sense of pride. I’m eighteen now, and although the girls at this school aren’t going to be much more than two or three years younger, we will be worlds apart from each other. It’s not a huge difference for someone who’s, say, twenty-one to interact with someone
who’s twenty-five, but I’m eighteen, and it is a lot for me to be mixing with fifteen-year-olds. I will probably have more in common with the teachers than I will with the students.

  With a sigh, I sit down and look at my calendar. I’ve worked it out so that I will only have to be at school for around a hundred and seventy days or so until my exams. That’s not a lot. Once I have those done, the world will be my oyster. It just makes me angry that Liam’s put me in this position in the first place.

  An involuntary shudder courses down my spine when I think about him. For over two years, he taught me to think that no one existed but him. Almost three years of knowing that what was happening was wrong, but being told lies. All the time, he filled my head with lies, lies, and more lies. He lied about my mother being dead and how the world outside our bubble didn’t give a shit about me. He lied every time he tried to convince me that it was just the two of us. That was all he wanted me to know. That ended eight months ago, and since then, I’ve had to endure countless therapy sessions and interviews with therapists who want to study the phenomenon of Stockholm Syndrome first-hand.

  I refuse to acknowledge that I suffer from that disorder. I don’t want to believe that I ever loved that man. But, at the same time, I can’t deny the fact that my heart was broken for a while after I escaped. I cried for two weeks solid after I came back. Sure, I look back at that time now and shudder. I consider myself mad for ever letting that man seep into my soul the way that he did. At the time, however, it felt like my world had ended. He was all I knew for three full years of my young life.

  With yesterday’s date marked off my calendar, I take a brief look at my watch and see that I only have thirty-two minutes before I need to get to school. Luckily, the school’s only a twenty-minute walk away, but I will need to leave now, so I won’t be late. Assembly starts at nine sharp.

  Picking up my rucksack, I straighten my black pleated school skirt and give myself a once over in the mirror. It’s not the best uniform in the world, but I’ll admit it’s not the worst. With a button down white shirt, black and red tie, and a black and red blazer, it all matches well.

  A knock sounding at my door makes me jump. “Are you decent, Ray?”

  I smile, almost rolling my eyes. No matter how many times I tell her to call me Sasha now, she still can’t help calling me Ray.

  “You can come in,” I answer back.

  The door pushes open, and my mum stands there, giving me the once over herself. “You’re looking very smart.”

  I smile. “Thanks.”

  “Do you fancy some breakfast? I’ve just put some toast on.”

  At the thought of putting food in my stomach, I grimace. “No thanks, Mum. I don’t really feel like food right now.”

  She steps forward, offering me a hand on my shoulder. “I know how difficult this must be for you, but it’s only for a short while. Just cling on to that.”

  I nod my head. “I know,” I answer with a brief sigh followed by a smile. With a quick look around the room, I make sure I have everything before turning back to my mum. “I’d better be off. I don’t want to be late on my first day.”

  With her arms out, my mum pulls me in for a quick embrace. “I’m proud of you. Just know that, okay? And I’ll get home as quick as I can from work. I’ll want to know all the goss.”

  I chuckle. “Sure thing.”

  My feet feel like weights as I make my way out of my room and towards the front door. Halfway through my journey, I receive a text message from Brett.

  Keep your chin up today. Just keep reminding yourself that you’re legal to drink. They still have at least two years to go before they can make fools of themselves. ;)

  I have to giggle at that. It is just the thing I need to kick myself out of my funk. I text back my thanks and promise to call him when I’m done. With renewed energy, I make my way to the school with five minutes to spare.

  When I arrive, the school seems to be in a state of organised chaos. School girls are chirping amongst themselves as the teachers hurriedly make their way through the crowds. Some of the younger ones have parents with them, but most don’t. Already, I feel awkward and out of place. As the chaos calms down a little, I see a line form toward the assembly hall. I already know this from the visit I had here a couple of months ago.

  One by one, they all move in, and soon, one of the teachers, who I recognise as Mrs Caterham, appears and starts glancing around all the heads. She will be my form tutor for the duration. As if sensing my stare, Mrs Caterham looks my way and immediately walks towards me.

  “Sasha, how are you feeling? Nervous?”

  I incline my head. “I must admit, I am.”

  “It’s only natural, but I’m sure you’ll be fine. Assembly first, and then I’ll take you all to your classroom. There are only nineteen pupils in your class. We figured you’d be better suited with as few students as possible.” She smiles, gesturing me towards the front of the line, and all the while, I don’t know whether to feel irked or pleased by what she’s just said.

  As I get in front of the line towards the assembly hall, a young girl with a bright smile and pigtails joins right behind me. She beams when I glance at her.

  “Hi,” she says in a bright, chirpy voice. Already, I want to go home. “My name’s Samantha. What’s yours?”

  “Sasha,” I say, offering her no more than that.

  She giggles. “Oh, my God! We could be like name twins! Both names begin with an S. How about Samansha?” She goes off into a fit of giggles at her own joke. “That sounds totally cool!” she screams.

  Can the floor swallow me up now?

  Only offering her a smile, I turn back to face the hallway when I feel a hand tap my shoulder. When I turn, she’s still got that same smile plastered on her face. “I hope you don’t mind me saying so, but you look more like a teacher than a student. You look like you should be like twenty or something.”

  All I can say is, “I get that all the time.”

  She squeals, making my eardrums hurt. I squint, naturally trying to move away from the pain of her shrill voice. “Ooh, I bet you can get into clubs so easily! You wouldn’t even need a fake ID. You’re so lucky.”

  “Oh, yes,” I respond with sarcasm. “I’m the luckiest girl in the world.”

  She’s about to respond when Mrs Caterham interrupts, shouting for us to get in line. Once satisfied, she nods towards me, so I start walking towards the next row of seats that are available in one of the middle rows. Shuffling up to the far end, I take my seat. Once settled, I look up and sense someone looking at me. When I turn, I see it’s Pigtails, flashing me a massive smile.

  “You’re new here.”

  I nod. “That I am.”

  “What school were you at before?”

  Nonchalantly, I utter, “Northside.”

  She frowns. “I’ve not heard of that one.”

  “That’s because it’s further up north. Near to Scotland.” I smile when I think of Scotland. I’ve yet to text Easton back. Despite knowing I shouldn’t be fooling around with men so soon after Liam, I can’t help the need I have inside me to contact him. He’s been making all the right moves since. It’s me who’s trying to pull away.

  “You don’t have a Scottish accent,” Samantha observes.

  “I’m not originally from Scotland. I’m from London. Just been living up there for a few years. Since my mum’s breakup, we decided to start a brand new life down in Bournemouth.” Mostly lies, but it is true that I was in London for a while before Liam took me. After my escape, my mum and I were given new identities and a new start in a place where, hopefully, Liam will never find me. And, he will look. Unfortunately, I know all too well that he won’t rest until he finds me. Sometimes, it’s that thought which keeps me awake at night.

  “I would love to live in London. My mum’s like, ‘You don’t want to live there—too many people.’ I love it, though. I guess it’s an age thing. I bet you loved it in London. Are you planning on moving bac
k once you finish school?”

  Questions. Too many that I both can’t and won’t answer. I shrug my shoulders, answering with a maybe and hoping that she’ll leave it at that. Of course, she doesn’t. She opens her mouth to ask another question, but thankfully, I’m saved by the teacher on stage shouting at everyone to be quiet.

  “Good morning, ladies.”

  “Good morning,” everyone answers.

  “We start a brand new year with some old faces, but also with some new ones.” She smiles, looking over to the eight year students. Luckily, she doesn’t look at me. “Now, most of you here will notice that we’ve had a few upgrades since July. Most are cosmetic, but there has been the addition of a new IT room with lots of brand new Mac laptops.” Everyone’s ooh’s and ahh’s make the teacher smile. “But also, as many of you already know, Mrs McClusky, the previous headmaster, retired in July, so we have a new addition to our growing family here at Lady Penelope’s. Please all welcome our new headmaster, Mr Lockhart.” Everyone cheers as the teacher motions towards the back of the room.

  And in he steps.

  At first, I think I’m seeing things. Maybe this is a dream. It must be. In an effort to wake myself up, I pinch my forearm hard, noticing that my skin’s puckering and turning white under my nails.

  It hurts.

  I’m not waking up.

  Feeling my panic rise, I look up, watching as he takes the place of the other teacher. His eyes are focused on the crowd, and there’s a smile on his face. I hear the collective gasps and talk of the girls as he takes his spot. They’ve all noticed how young he looks and how good looking he is. How his lips curve up into a sexy, brooding smile. The very same lips I was sucking face with just last night.

  Easton.

  Feeling all the eyes upon him, Easton pulls a little on his tie before clearing his throat. “Good morning, ladies,” he says with that all too familiar Scottish accent. I can hear the dreamy sighs from all the females in the room.

  My face heats. Luckily, he hasn’t noticed me yet, and I don’t want him to. This will be just as embarrassing for him as it is for me. The heat in the room suddenly triples as my hands feel clammy, and my stomach coils. The last thing I need in a room full of people is a panic attack, but the more I try to calm my ever-beating heart, the more it bounces against my ribcage. Easton starts talking, but all I can hear is, “Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.”