The New Adventures of Foster Fade, The Crime Spectacularist

by Adam Lance Garcia

  Fade followed the manager and Brandt into the bank vault where he heard the manager’s anguished tale. He had come in that morning and, despite the scene out back with the body, was preparing to open up. He went through all the normal routines and then on schedule he opened the vault. But unlike most days, this time he received a shock; the vault, though it had been locked, was completely empty of all its cash. The deposit boxes and coins were still intact, but the vault had been holding a hundred and fifty thousand dollars in cash, which was now missing. The frantic manager, now in a full-blown sweat, began to claw at his hair in a mad panic. He just stood there, his jaw hanging open, staring at the empty vault, his head bobbing back and forth in disbelief.

  The inspector asked all the normal questions as far as who else had access to the vault and such, but Fade already knew that, Brandt was asking all the wrong things. He walked over to the small one foot by one foot square that matched the one on the outside and shined his light into the shaft. He was sure now more than ever that his theory—as incredible as it sounded—was correct. Trying to keep the inspector from guessing what he found out, he instead reached into his jacket and pulled out a compact case. He clicked a hidden button on the side and three special lenses swung outward, as well as a high-powered light. He moved around the vault casually and spotted the tell-tale signs he sought. Rat hairs. Not wanting to gather Brandt’s attention, he quickly hit the button to close up the case, and then deposited it back in his jacket. Fade was not ready to divulge his knowledge to Brandt, wanting instead to have every chance for the Planet to bask in the glory of him solving the case. Fade casually headed for the vault door and exited through it into the bank lobby. Brandt, having caught sight of him exiting, hurried after him.

  “Wait up, Fade! You just gonna leave without talking to me?”

  “I was hoping,” Fade answered. Brandt’s jaw dropped a little at first, before becoming a grimace.

  “Aw c’mon Fade,” Brandt said, his hands outstretched in a questioning pose, “surely you have some ideas about what the hell happened here.”

  Fade’s answer was straight lipped and somewhat callous. “Tons!” Fade continued walking. Brandt thought about hauling his ass down to headquarters, but after a moment thought better of it. He knew it wouldn’t get him anywhere except in the mayor’s doghouse, besides it wasn’t like he shared any of his info with Fade either. Brandt shoved his cigar back in his mouth and headed back into the vault to search for clues.

  Fade looked around for Din. He didn’t have to look hard, just for the group of officers standing around google eyed, and Din was right dab in the center. He pushed his way through and pulled her aside.

  “Listen Peaches, if you can pry yourself away from the crowd of lame gawkers, I need you to get your shots developed and be quick about it. I am not sure if they of course will be of any use, but you must after all earn the overinflated check of yours. Besides, it will make for good eye candy when I wrap this think up.”

  Din was ready to open her mouth but Fade never gave her a chance as he walked off and hailed a nearby taxi. Din shook her head and stomped her feet. Fade just really rubbed her hard sometimes. A smile, though, came to her face in no time. He was right, she would be well compensated for her efforts. Pulling out a compact and giving herself a once over, she smiled. Closing the compact back up, she headed back to the car that she had been brought in.

  ***

  West Eighth Street was part of Greenwich Village, a quaint little section of town, mostly residential, but with a few businesses and storefronts mixed in. LE-Baulb was just such a storefront. Patrique LeBlanc had opened the small jewelry store over ten years ago and had become quite successful. Patrique wasn’t the biggest but he always carried some expensive merchandise, as well as becoming somewhat of a celebrity with all the high priced merchandise and original paintings that dotted the walls. All the upper class and several movie stars were amongst his growing list of clients.

  Patrique had just finished up a setting and was putting the jewels in the safe. In the process of getting everything set for closing, Patrique looked forward to a wonderful dinner at one of his favorite restaurants. He was set to lock the safe when he heard the jingle of the little bell that let him know someone had entered the store. He made his way through the heavy curtain that separated his workshop from the front of the store and stepped behind one of the counters. The sight that greeted him was most unwelcome and caused a thin lipped scowl to form on his face.

  The sight of a couple of black men greeted him. Patrique was a little startled, but quickly gathered his composure. He was always willing to make new clients, no matter what the variety, but it had been a long day. Besides, they were a couple of strange looking birds. One was emaciated and sat hunched in a wheel chair wearing some sort of strange looking headdress. The other was nearly as wide as he was tall, with a huge head and elongated arms. He appeared to be a solid mound of muscle. He had a strange smile on his face and a strange glint in his eyes, almost seeming crazed.

  The pair started toward him. LeBlanq moved from behind the counter with his hands held out as he spoke. “I am sorry, gentlemen, but we are closed, I just have not had a chance to lock up and spin the sign.”

  Artemis Gray looked up at Patrique with a most sinister smile, his eyes slightly glazed. Patrique caught himself in stride and twirled the edge of his dark Van Dyke nervously.

  “I am aware,” Artemis spoke in a high pitched and somewhat phlegm choked voice, “that you are not used to folks of our…well our persuasion, entering your small and sheltered world. The world of the rich and well to do…a world that mostly does not include men like us.” He paused. “My name is Artemis Gray, sir. Now, whether or not that name becomes one you remember depends largely on how you choose to play your cards over the next few minutes. You see, my good man, simply put we are here to remove your jewels.”

  Patrique was amazed at the intelligence the man displayed. He didn’t know it but Artemis welled with excitement at the vast knowledge that seemed to be in his possession, a welcomed change from the days of being a dullard. “Now don’t be alarmed. We only plan on taking a bag full of your merchandise, just a small dent in the fortune you possess.”

  As if on cue the short man stepped out from behind the wheelchair and held out a burlap sack. Patrique felt his cheeks flush at the prospect of being robbed. Patrique hurriedly stepped from behind the counter as he said, “Now listen here my good man, I will not be plundered like some helpless oaf.” With that Patrique moved and grabbed a metal pipe that was concealed next to a case.

  The smile on Artemis’ face grew larger. It exposed large and somewhat yellowed teeth. Piercing eyes bore into Patrique.

  The two men stared at each other for a few moments. As they did, the short man began to slap the burlap sack. A loud buzzing protruded from the bag, causing Patrique to cast his stare at it. Artemis now chuckled, a deep and throaty laugh.

  “It is a shame,” Artemis said, “you didn’t choose to cooperate with me, sir. I am afraid you leave me no choice.” With that Artemis raised a hand in gesture and the bag dropped to the floor. As it fell open, a hornet’s nest was exposed. Patrique’s eyes shot wide with terror as a black and yellow cloud of buzzing whining hornets formed a cloud and hovered at attention, as if awaiting a command.

  Patrique looked at Artemis who now had a crazed smile upon his face. He closed his eyes and as if on cue the hornets moved forward and descended upon Patrique, white hot needles bringing their fury to his skin again and again. He tried to run but they enveloped him so that he could barely be seen. It looked like thousands of hornets had formed into a madly waving man. The form moved and then caught the carpet edge and fell through the glass of a display, rolling to the floor and writhing and spitting out choked screams. The movement ended shortly becoming just an occasional twitch, then stopping completely.

  The hornets as if on cue left the now lifeless form of Patrique and hovered in the air above him. Artemis again
closed his eyes, and as if on cue, the hornets entered the bag where their nest still sat. it took only a short time and they were all neatly back in place, with Roscoe closing the bag back up and tying it off with a rope. The bag was placed on a shelf that was built into the back of the wheel chair. Quickly Roscoe grabbed an empty sack and proceeded to fill it with all the jewels that Artemis pointed out to him. The bag was filled with the finest stuff in no time flat. Rosco tied it closed and placed it in Artemis’s lap. The two rolled out of the store as if nothing had transpired.

  ***

  Fade was working away in his lab back at the Planet. He sat at a desktop with some sort of radio like device and a soldering iron. Sweat furrowed on his brow, which he impatiently wiped on his shirtsleeve. The device he slaved over was a concept he came up with some time ago that would for a lack of a better word, scramble radio waves. It didn’t matter what kind either, the device could gauge whatever sort of wave was being transmitted and then encode a scrambler wave. It was meant to be able to scramble police band waves if a need arose, but with some tinkering… “Yes!” Fade exclaimed to himself.

  Fade moved to his large office desk in order to test out the device he just tweaked. He glanced at the glass screen that was built into his desk top. It was yet another of the brilliant devices he devised. It worked off the same concepts of a periscope with mirrors and glass tubes. It allowed him to observe whatever activity was going on outside his office door. This was very helpful indeed for a man who not only made many enemies, but also managed to rub a fair amount of others the wrong way.

  Din exited the elevator at that moment, dressed in a scarlet dress from a new design line. She had just come from a massage and felt loose and relaxed. She approached the office door, but before she even knocked there was a click as the lock was disengaged. She pushed the door inward to find Fade sitting behind his desk with his hands crossed together in front of him. He smiled at her, but she knew he was anything but happy. She flung him a half hearted smile and dropped the envelope containing the developed photos she had stopped and picked up on the way up. Fade glanced at the envelope and spoke.

  “Well my pampered princess, I hope it wasn’t too much trouble taking care of this. I mean it must be rough trying to organize your days, what with all the hair salon appointments, massages, and manicures. But of course, one with limited talents must make the most of what she can.” Rising from his seat, Fade walked over to the chair that Din now stood next to. “Here have a seat and take a load off your feet. I mean you must be absolutely exhausted after toughing out another massage from Sven.”

  “Look here, Mr. Spectacular, get over yourself already. I am here to help if needed and to put into words what the Planet pays you the big bucks for. I am not here to put up with your sarcasm or your overinflated ego. I do my job well, and make you look like a genius, and I get paid handsomely for it. The fact that I choose to enjoy life to the fullest, in no way means I have to put up with all your hot air, you got it?” Din stabbed her finger in Fade’s chest to emphasize her point, then gave him a Cheshire cat grin and sat down.

  “Listen, Din, I have a theory on that bank robbery. I also have a theory on how it was accomplished. I also have an idea on how we might be able to thwart future attempts. If I’m right…hell strike that, I know I’m right, my idea will put a bug in our perp’s soup. Here let me show you something.” Fade motioned her over to the desk that held the device he had been tinkering with when she walked in. Din shook her head and shot Fade a cocky sneer.

  “It looks like a cheap radio Fade, is this your big break through? What are you gonna make the guy beg for mercy by playing bad music over and over?” Fade shot her a dagger filled stare.

  “Well Din, I can see where an over-dyed brain like yours would think that way. This however is much more than a simple radio, even though it looks like one. Whoever did that heist at the bank and killed that poor officer, has figured out a way to use electronic waves to get vermin to do his bidding. To speak in terms someone of your intellect can understand, he is able to control lower thought beings, rats in the case of the bank. This device I invented should be able to jam the waves he is using, thereby keeping him from gaining control over the rats, or whatever other thing he tries to control.” Fade walked around the desk and turned the device on. There was a little crackling at first and a low humming before the light from its tubes showed through the vents in the side. Fade looked at Din.

  “Ok, Din, I need you to walk over to the police band radio in the corner and turn it on please.” Din doubted what Fade was saying, but she walked over to the shelf on which sat the police radio and flicked the on switch. There was instant chatter coming from the thing, as it picked up all the calls and communications that New York’s finest were sending out. Fade smiled.

  “Ok Din, now watch what happens.” Fade turned a few dials, and made a few adjustments, and then finally hit a little toggle switch on the front of his device. The chatter that was spewing from the radio instantly became a piercing trill humming, high pitched, and offensive to the hearing. Din winced and brought her hands up to cover her ears. Fade again grinned. He had Din turn the dial to all the different frequencies and channels the police ban covered—the effect was the same on all of them. Satisfied that the device worked, Fade switched the machine off. Instantly the chatter on the police band started up again as if it had never stopped.

  “Din, if my theory is right, this little device should help us to not only get a great story, but in the process, stop a master criminal.” Din tilted her head to the side and held her hand up in question. Fade smiled.

  Their conversation never came to fruition, as they were interrupted by the ringing of the phone. Din quickly snatched up the receiver and answered it. Her face became a grimace as she listened to the voice on the other end. Hanging up the phone, she relayed to Fade that it was Brandt. There had been another robbery committed in Greenwich Village, with a similar MO. This time it was the owner of a jewelry store. The man had been stung to death, and from appearances, it looked like there had been hundreds of hornets in his little store. Fade shook his head in disgust.

  “Din, I want you to listen to my theory on what I think is happening. It is going to sound crazy and far fetched to one such as you.” Din rolled her eyes. “But! I am convinced I am on the right path.” Fade spent the next twenty minutes explaining his theory to Din while they headed over to the jewelry store. Din was speechless. She had seen some pretty strange stuff while being employed to write Fade’s adventures, but this one took the cake.

  They arrived at the jewelry store, threw a few bills at the driver, and exited the cab. Fade flashed his Planet badge and was allowed to cross the police lines. They walked into the jewelry store and found Brandt and the coroner standing over the lifeless body. As they got a little closer, Din held back a screech by bringing her hand up to her mouth. The body was a gruesome sight with swollen purple lumps covering every inch of the exposed skin. The facial features were unrecognizable. There were dead hornets in every opening, ears, nose, and mouth. Din had to excuse herself to head outside for some fresh air. Brandt seeing Fade, pulled his hat off and ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation as he spoke.

  “Fade, I gotta tell ya, I have never seen anything like this. What a horrible way to die.” There were no bits of sarcasm as Fade merely nodded in agreement.

  “Look, Brandt. I have a reasonable theory I would like to run by you. I don’t want you to be intimidated by it, being as how I know it is over you pay grade. I was gonna keep it to myself, but this has to be stopped before another poor fool ends up like this or worse.” Brandt ran his cupped hand across his face, trying to keep his composure. This was just Fade’s persona, and though Brandt hated it, the ghastly scene before him trumped everything he might feel. Brandt needed to work with Fade and put an end to this as quickly as possible. If that meant eating some crow from Fade, then so be it, this maniac needed to be caught.

  Brandt slipped his hat
back on and motioned for Fade to follow him. He stopped and whispered a few things to one of the officers standing there and then headed out the front. Fade followed closely behind until they were both standing out front. Brandt spoke first.

  “Listen, Fade, I got no love lost for you and I am more than sure the feelings are mutual! But this goes beyond any pettiness we may feel towards each other. There’s a coffee shop right up the street, so if you’re game we can sit down and lay our cards on the table, and try to work this out.”

  Fade smirked and shook his head. “I hold the winning hand, Brandt, so follow me and I will explain what needs to be done so even you can understand it.” Before Brandt could say anything Fade’s long legs had carried him off towards the coffee shop. Brandt felt his blood pressure rise, but calmed and followed Fade to the shop. This was one time he was willing to suffer through Fade’s quips to put an end to this madman’s scheme.

  The two entered the coffee shop and grabbed a booth towards the back. They both ordered just coffee, the sight in the jewelry shop pretty much killed any appetite they might have had. After they ordered Brandt started things off.

  “Look, Fade, I understand you’re good at what you do, but you have to understand that I have a job to do as well, it may not always be spectacular, but I think I am damn good at what I do. Hell, believe it or not, I may actually have information that you don’t know every now and then. So how about losing the mightier-than-thou attitude just this once, ok?” Fade paused as if mulling the thought over and then nodded in agreement. “Ok, so we got what I think is a break on the jewelry store. It sounds crazy, but at this point nothing would shock me. A lady happened to look out of her window around the time we think that the poor fella was killed. But get a loada this. She says she saw a negro in a wheel chair being pushed by another negro who reminded her of an ape, leaving the store right around the time the guy normally closes. She says the two just casually moved down the street and out of sight. Crazy right?”