Bad Boy Summer (Bad Boys on Holiday Book 5)

by Sylvia Pierce

  When she finally pulled back to look at him, he was watching her, his hazel eyes bright and intense in the morning light. “I was a pretty messed up kid back then,” he said, tucking a lock of hair behind Pam’s ear. “Now I’m a marginally messed up guy. I know I fucked up yesterday. I said shitty things I didn’t mean, and then I bailed again. But I’m trying. Every fucking minute, I’m trying.”

  “I know,” she whispered. “I’m trying, too.” And she was. Trying to be honest with herself. With what she wanted in her life. What she didn’t want. All the things she still had to deal with.

  She told him about her decision to leave her program, to quit her job.

  Ash’s entire face lit up. “This mean you’re getting back into photography?”

  “I’d like to. I just… it’s all a little overwhelming at the moment.” Pam pushed her glasses on top of her head. “I don’t even know where to start looking for classes, and I’ll need to get new equipment, rent studio space for portraits, see if I can tag along to assist at weddings… it’s a lot to consider.”

  “Tag along? Fuck that.” Ash shook his head. “They need to assist you. You’re so talented, Pam. Seriously. You got this.”

  “That’s basically what Lizzie said. Shit, where is she, anyway? Did you guys talk?” She’d been so caught up in the notes, in finding Ash on the deck, she’d totally forgotten about Liz.

  “We talked this morning,” Ash said. “Still got a few things to work through, but we’re cool. She left to give us some space—said she’d be back in an hour with breakfast.”

  “Oh. Okay.” Pam sighed, looking out across the ocean. She was so grateful that she and Lizzie had made up, that Ash and Lizzie were back on track. And of course, that Ash had come back. It was the best possible outcome, really. But it didn’t make her heart hurt any less. She hated the fact that she had to leave them again.

  Both of them.

  “Deeds,” Ash said, sliding his fingers under her chin, turning her face toward his. In a whisper as soft as the breeze, he said, “Forgive me?”

  Pam cupped his face, sliding her thumb over his lips. “I forgave you at ‘Don’t leave’.”

  “Are you kidding me?” Ash laughed, the sound filling Pam with so much happiness she was nearly in tears again. “That was like twenty Post-its ago. And you let me pour my heart out anyway?”

  Pam gave him a playful smirk, grateful for the levity. “Figured it wouldn’t hurt to reinforce it. By the way, very impressive showing on that Sharpie heart. All this time, I thought you only knew how to draw dicks.”

  ”Deeds, my talent and imagination know no bounds.”

  “Yeah. Speaking of your talents…” She shifted in his lap, straddling him, suddenly desperate to feel him inside her again.

  “How much time do we have before Lizzie gets back?”

  “Probably fifteen minutes, tops.”

  Pam’s lips curved into a wicked grin as she palmed Ash through his shorts. As usual, he was hard and ready for her, straining against her touch. “Better make it fast, then.”

  He groaned, pulling her close, rocking against her. “I can’t do fast with you, Deeds. Doesn’t work that way.”

  Pam leaned forward, blazing a trail of kisses from the edge of his mouth to his ear. In a low, husky voice, she said, “You’d better make it work, Asher Burke.”

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Ten minutes later, Pam sat on the beach chair opposite Ash, her feet in his lap, her heart rate slowly going back to normal. Ten minutes was a record for them, and they both looked like they’d just run a marathon. Her hair had come loose from her bun, blowing into her face, making both of them laugh.

  When she finally wrangled it back into the rubber band, Ash was looking at her, his eyes intense. “Where do we go from here, Deeds?”

  Pam lowered her eyes. This was the part they were both dreading. No matter how they felt about each other, no matter what declarations and apologies they’d made, the fact was he was staying in California, and she still lived in New York. Quitting her program hadn’t changed that.

  “My flight leaves in a few hours,” she said.

  “That’s not what I mean.”

  Pam looked into his eyes again, still blazing with fire. He was right. She did know it. This was Ash, finally putting himself out there, opening his heart to her just like she’d wanted.

  And she needed to do the same, even if it wasn’t what he wanted to hear.

  “I have to go back, Ash. I have to tie things up there.” As much as Pam felt good about the decisions she’d made, she hadn’t really confronted the ramifications yet. She’d sent an email, and since then she’d ignored Ferguson’s voicemails, hadn’t even checked to see if he’d written a response. A lot of people had supported her through the program, and even though they hadn’t been perfect, they still deserved an explanation—in person. She also had to resign from her job, hire and train her replacement, look into photography classes, see if she could find a photographer to shadow, probably get a part time gig until she could figure out her next move. She had some savings, but there were no guarantees. Not anymore.

  It was a lot to deal with, and she hadn’t even made a pros and cons list yet—hadn’t even begun to prioritize. A month ago, the lack of organization would’ve sent her into a tailspin of anxiety and worry. But now, the fact that nothing was written down filled her with a sense of excitement, like anything was possible. It was exactly how she wanted it. Unscripted. Uncertain. Hopeful.

  “I can’t make any promises,” she said. “Not about anything. I don’t know how long it will take, how long I’ll have to stay in New York. I don’t know where I’ll end up. I don’t even know what happens once I get off that plane.”

  “I don’t care how long it takes. I’m not going anywhere.” He knelt on the deck floor before her, grabbing her hands. “I made that mistake ten years ago, and I almost made it again last night. But believe me, it’s not happening again, Pam. I swear to you.”

  “Ash…”

  “All I’m asking is for you to give me another shot. A second chance. I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Making you happy. Doesn’t matter where we live, what jobs we find. We can figure it out, Deeds. Together. Just… please. Please say okay.”

  The flame she’d been tamping down all summer flickered to life again inside her chest. She was scared to let it burn unchecked, scared it would consume her. But that was the only way to truly love. And it was, no matter how hard she’d tried to convince herself otherwise, the way she’d always felt about Ash. Her love for him was wild and all-consuming, a white hot light that burned like her own personal sun, illuminating her from the inside out.

  And so, with no plan, no safety net, nothing but hopeful optimism, Pam made another leap.

  “Okay,” she whispered. “Okay.”

  Ash pulled her into a kiss she felt all the way to her toes. Sliding her fingers into his hair, she was about to see if they could manage another quickie when they were interrupted by someone stomping up the deck stairs.

  “I leave you alone for an hour,” Lizzie said, laughing, “and this is what happens? God, you two are like a couple of horny teenagers.”

  “Horny adults, thank you very much.” Ash winked at his sister, and when Lizzie rolled her eyes in return, Pam knew the Burke siblings were going to be just fine.

  “Great,” Lizzie said. “I hope you filthy animals worked up an appetite. I didn’t know what you wanted, so I basically got some of everything.”

  “Perfect.” Pam untangled herself from Ash to help Lizzie with the takeout bags. “Some of everything is exactly what I wanted.”

  “Sit down, sit down,” Lizzie said, nudging open the sliding door with her foot. “It’ll take me about fifteen minutes to make coffee and get all of this set up. So, you guys… you know. Do what you need to do. But I swear to God, if I hear one sound from either of you…”

  Pam didn’t hear what Lizzie said after that. She was already back i
n Ash’s arms, his hands in her hair, their mouths locked together in a kiss as deep and endless as the sea, her whole body warm and tingling, her heart light and free.

  At Summerland, anything was possible. Even magic.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Two Months Later

  Ash leaned back in the beach chair on the deck at Summerland, feet up on the railing, soaking up the last of the ocean view before he’d have to turn over the keys to the new owner.

  His old man had made all the arrangements; sold it direct without any realtors, said he’d gotten a fair price, even managed to score another job for Ash—the owner apparently wanted to add a studio space and make a few more renovations she’d go over with him in person.

  Ash was glad for the work—hell, he needed the cash, and it would give him a little more time to say goodbye to the place. But after that? He couldn’t think that far ahead. All he could think about was what his future would be like if his girl didn’t come back.

  Damn near shredded his heart every time.

  It’d been two months since Deeds had returned to New York, and though they’d talked almost every night, he fucking missed her. Missed seeing that smile, holding her in his arms. Missed the taste of her kisses and the way she whispered his name when he made her come. Missed her sweet, apricots-and-honey scent. Hell, he couldn’t even look at a Post-it without thinking of her, and he’d taken to carrying around a yellow highlighter in his tool belt, just because it reminded him of her.

  Ash still had no idea how much longer she’d need to tie things up in New York, and they hadn’t even talked about concrete plans after that. This was new territory for both of them, and they promised they wouldn’t push each other. One misstep and the whole thing could implode.

  Might implode anyway. Love was risky business. But for Deeds? Hell, he’d take that chance a thousand times over if it meant holding her in his arms even one more time.

  There was a knock at the mudroom door, and Ash swore under his breath. This was it. The last day Summerland would be part of the Burke family. Slowly, he rose from the chair, taking one last look at the ocean, whispering a few thoughts for his mother.

  He knew she’d be sad that they’d sold the place, but he liked to think they’d given it a pretty good send-off this summer. After all, it had helped him reconnect with Liz, get started on that long road to forgiveness with his family. It’d given him a meaningful job to do, a purpose when he was completely unmoored.

  And most importantly, it had brought Pam back into his life.

  He’d fallen in love with her here at Summerland, all over again.

  Ash smiled. He knew his mother would’ve liked that.

  Back in the house, Ash walked through the living room and into the kitchen, keeping his head down. The new owner had bought the place fully furnished, but he’d boxed up all the personal effects, the bedding, the photos. Between that and his repairs, the place didn’t look quite the same, and Ash wanted to remember it as it had been.

  As home.

  Steeling himself, he yanked open the mudroom door, looking up into the face of Summerland’s new owner.

  “Hi there. Are those my keys?” Tapping her foot against the new kitchen floor, she held out her hand, impatient as hell, the most gorgeous fucking woman he’d ever seen. “The former owner promised you wouldn’t give me any trouble, Asher Burke.”

  A smile lit up Ash’s face, his heart jack-hammering in his chest. He practically hauled the door off its hinges trying to get to her. When he did, he pulled her into his arms and buried his face in her hair, inhaling every bit of her soft sweetness.

  “Sorry, beautiful,” he said, his mouth watering for a taste of her. “If you don’t want trouble, you’ve come to the wrong fucking place.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Ash’s kiss left her breathless, her legs trembling, her whole body on fire. Now, more than ever, there was no doubt in Pam’s mind that Summerland was where she belonged.

  Where they belonged.

  When they finally broke for air, Pam took a deep breath, steadying herself. “I just… I couldn’t bear the thought of you guys letting this place go. It means so much to you and Liz—and to me, too. I talked it over with Liz and your father, and then I took a chance. I wanted to surprise you, Ash.”

  “You… you seriously bought Summerland?” Ash shook his head in disbelief, a smile stretching across his face. “This mean you’ll be coming here for regular vacations?”

  “No.” Pam gave him a tentative smile, tucking her hair behind her ears. “Ash, this isn’t a vacation house. This is permanent. For both of us.”

  “Wait… what are you saying?”

  “I’m saying I want this.” Pam looped her arms around his neck again, stretching up on her toes to kiss him. Three months ago, out on that back deck with everything to lose, Ash had opened himself up to her, offering his love with no pressure, no expectation, no guarantee. Now, it was her turn. “I want us,” she said. “Here. In this house. Together, Ash.”

  Ash slid his hands down her back, holding her tight. Behind his T-shirt, she could feel the banging of his heart, as wild and crazy as hers.

  Please say yes… please say yes… please say yes…

  “What about New York?” he asked.

  New York… The city had been good to Pam, but she was ready to move on now. It’d taken her two months, but she’d done it. Closed out her graduate school accounts. Transitioned out of her job. Cashed out her stock options. Sold just about everything she owned, including her apartment. With some help from one of her colleagues, she was able to find a great rate on a mortgage and a small business loan, and assuming the renovations at Summerland went as planned, she’d be opening her photography business in time for Christmas.

  It was a risk. A big one. Not just moving across the country, but owning her own business. She could just as easily make a comfortable living as crash and burn. But her MBA coursework and job experience had taught her more than a few things about being an entrepreneur, and she was confident she could make a go of it. She’d done the cost/benefit analysis and a profit and loss statement, not to mention about a hundred pages of projections and marketing plans. After all, you could take the girl out of business school, but…

  “Well,” Pam laughed. “You know what they say. Nice place to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there. Especially not when the man I love is here.”

  “So… you’re back in California,” Ash said, staring at her in disbelief. She could practically see the thoughts crashing through his head as he tried to take it all in. “Here. In Starfish Cove. For good.”

  “For as long as the Cove will have me. As long as you’ll have me. Ash, I—”

  Ash cut her off with a kiss, pressing his lips to hers, sliding his hands into her hair, everything about his touch so perfect and right. Pam sighed against him, parting her lips, tasting him all over again. He was hot and sweet and everything she remembered, everything she loved.

  After an eternity, Ash finally pulled back to look at her, brushing the hair off her face. In a ragged whisper that sent a bolt of desire to her core, he said, “God, you’re a sight for sore eyes.”

  “Glad you think so,” she teased. “Because I’m about to give you a honey-do list about eight miles long.”

  “A honey-do-me list? I accept. Twice a day, three times on Sundays.” Ash squeezed her ass. “On the beach or off. Ladies’ choice.”

  “How considerate.”

  “I’m just getting started.”

  “Great, because I also need a studio built, and maybe even a small office space, if we can get the right permits. Are you up for the job?”

  Ash flashed her a crooked grin. “One condition. You follow me around wearing nothing but that tool belt.”

  Pam sighed. “If I say yes, does that mean I get a discount on my remodel?”

  “It means you get whatever the hell you want.”

  What she wanted was Ash. In her bedroom, in her heart, in
her home, in her life. She’d always wanted him, and no amount of time or distance or complications would ever change that.

  And the sooner they got to work on the plans, the sooner she could get set up. The ideas were already spinning through her mind, just begging to be put into a spreadsheet.

  “Hang on.” She grabbed her purse from the counter, pulled out a notebook and Sharpie, flipping to the page with the orange tab. “I’ve already started a list.”

  Ash kissed the tip of her nose. “Of course you have.”

  “What? It’s just better to be organized about these things.”

  Another kiss. “Of course it is.”

  “That way we won’t forget anything.”

  “You mean, like this?” He snatched the pen from her hand bit off the cap, pressing the tip to her palm, quickly drawing a penis with a happy face.

  Pam cracked up. “Glad to know you’re still a pervert.”

  “Yes, about that… Pam, I’d really like to be your pervert.”

  Still laughing, Pam said, “You are my pervert. Always.”

  “I mean, legally speaking.”

  It took a minute for her to process what he’d just said. “You… what?”

  Without warning, Ash dropped down on his knee in front of her.

  “I should’ve done this two months ago,” he said. “Hell, I should’ve done it ten years ago, but I was too wrapped up in my own shit to see what was right in front of my face.”

  “What… what are you saying?” Blood rushed to Pam’s face, making her hot, her chest fluttery.

  “I love you. Always have. Now that you’re back, right here in this house, standing in front of me with your lists and your colored tabs and your beautiful fucking eyes and that hair and… Jesus, Pam. If you think I’m letting another day go by without saying these words, you’re crazy.”

  Pam’s heart was in her throat. She could barely speak. “What words?”