The Lost Souls Dating Agency

by Suneeti Rekhari

  ‘What’s wrong with you, m’boy?’ Mr Singh looked concerned.

  ‘I’m fine.’ Finn’s face turned red. ‘Excuse me, I’m just not used to this kind of tea. It’s delicious. I’ll just let it cool down a little.’ He placed the cup back on the table.

  I saw the corners of Jaya’s mouth curl upwards.

  ‘Ah yes, Indian chai is world famous,’ Mr Singh said with a smile at Finn. ‘I like it with a teaspoon of honey now and again, even though it’s best with three spoons of sugar.’

  ‘Not at your age,’ Anamika Singh said sternly.

  Mr Singh looked wistfully at the little container of white sugar crystals.

  Finn took another sip of his tea and his lips pursed tightly. I noticed and tentatively sipped my own tea. It was delicious, sweet and full of the subtle tones of cardamom. So why did Finn look like he was in pain when he sipped his?

  He put his cup down and I noticed Jaya watch him carefully. Was that a mischievous twinkle in her eye or was I just seeing things?

  I turned my attention to Finn’s conversation with Mr Singh. There was an awkward pause when Mr Singh mentioned Jaya’s were-form.

  ‘You turn into a kangaroo?’ Finn’s eyes bulged at Jaya. She nodded defiantly at him.

  ‘Wow! That’s almost as impressive as me turning into a shark, but not quite,’ Finn chortled.

  Jaya’s eyes widened. ‘Your form is shark?’ For the first time today, I saw her look at him with interest.

  Finn grinned at her. Mr Singh frowned. ‘You didn’t tell me your form was shark.’ He looked accusingly at Finn.

  Jaya ignored him and asked Finn, ‘What’s it like being underwater?’

  ‘It’s like scuba diving without the wetsuit and tank weighing you down.’

  ‘I’ve never met a were-shark before!’ she exclaimed.

  ‘Well that’s because there aren’t too many of us around.’ Finn positively beamed.

  ‘This is most disturbing,’ Mr Singh muttered. I felt him glare at me. I studied the pattern on the rug carefully avoiding his glare.

  Jaya and Finn talked about his were-shark experiences. He regaled her with stories of hapless divers, scared half to death by an oncoming shark in darkened recesses of underwater caverns. My mind wandered to Will and his shipwreck project in Byron Bay. Had he been one of these divers?

  ‘The divers are in no danger, I wouldn’t harm them, but you should see their faces! Petrified,’ Finn explained jovially.

  Jaya laughed. Mrs Singh walked out of the room and began silently to lay the table in the adjoining dining room. Glass doors connected the two rooms. Appetising aromas wafted through. All the while, I saw Mr Singh look sulkily at Finn and Jaya and occasionally glare at me. He interjected in the middle of Jaya and Finn’s conversation, and declared grouchily, ‘Finn, would you like some more tea? My wife has prepared some food, please help yourself.’

  ‘Oh I would love another cup of tea,’ he said in exaggerated tones, ‘made just the way it was. Bloody fantastic!’ I saw him give Jaya an imperceptible wink.

  What was going on with the tea?

  I had my chance to ask Finn as we were leaving and stood with Jaya on the veranda. Mr and Mrs Singh remained indoors, though I had a sneaky suspicion we were being watched from a concealed vantage point somewhere.

  ‘Okay, you guys, come clean, what was going on with the tea?’ I asked. I was bursting with curiosity.

  Jaya looked mortified. She said to Finn, ‘I’m really sorry I did that. I don’t know what came over me.’

  ‘That’s okay. I had a really nice time, despite the fact that I almost exploded from drinking your special tea.’ Finn laughed amicably.

  Jaya turned to me. ‘I put chilli powder in his tea!’

  ‘You did whaaat?’ I asked half laughing and half wondering.

  ‘I feel awful.’ Jaya looked genuinely ashamed. ‘I was just so mad at this whole situation…’

  So she decided chilli tea would help? Psycho!

  But then, I tried to look at it from her perspective and gave her the benefit of the doubt. I knew Finn had.

  Jaya looked at Finn. ‘Thanks for not telling on me. My parents would have been furious.’

  ‘Oh I think your dad might have appreciated it. I don’t think he was too impressed by my were-form.’ Finn said this light-heartedly, but I sensed the seriousness underneath. So did Jaya.

  ‘My father doesn’t appreciate many things. But he is a good man, who can come around to understanding different points of view,’ Jaya paused, ‘very slowly,’ she ended with a brittle laugh.

  They both smiled at each other.

  We were entering that magical twilight moment when the sky is tinged with a purple pink hue. I decided now was a good time to take my leave.

  I left them on the veranda. As I drove away, I wondered how this “case” would end.

  Case Three: Doris the Pretender

  Chapter 30

  The next week, uni started again. We were all getting to the business end of our degrees and I hardly saw Megan and Neha. They were busy with classes and I spent most of my time shuttling between home, study and the warehouse. Will had finished all his Arts electives and I missed seeing him more than I dared admit.

  About three weeks after the meeting in the Singh household, I received a cheque in the mail. It came attached with a note, which read, “with thanks from the Singh family”. The amount was substantially larger than what Mr Singh had agreed to. This was the second time! Why did my clients feel compelled to over-pay? Not that I was complaining.

  Unlike Victor, I knew Mr Singh had been less than happy with my services. Maybe he had a change of heart. Unlikely! I examined the cheque closely. The signature did not look like his. I squinted at it.

  Well, well, well.

  A wide grin slowly crept across my face, as I skipped from my chair and sashayed around the office doing a happy dance, in celebration of all the mothers of the world. The cheque was signed Anamika Singh.

  ***

  Later that day Will rang and confirmed what I suspected when I received the payment.

  ‘I’ve lost my friend,’ he groaned. ‘I haven’t seen him in weeks.’

  ‘That was an unintentional side effect.’ I smirked.

  ‘He mopes about terribly when he isn’t with Jaya. I haven’t seen him this far gone before.’

  ‘Well I’m happy to hear it.’

  ‘You’re good, Shalini,’ he said smoothly, ‘very good when it comes to…what shall I call it…matters of ze heart?’ he said with a fake French accent.

  I giggled and felt myself blush. I was glad he was on the other end of a phone line.

  ‘So when do I get to see you in action?’ he asked out of the blue.

  ‘What do you mean?’ I didn’t understand him.

  ‘Can I visit you at the warehouse?’ he asked hesitantly.

  ‘Of course you can!’

  ‘Great. We can meet for lunch beforehand and then go over?’ he asked quickly.

  I immediately said yes. I wondered why I hadn’t thought to do this before.

  ***

  The next afternoon I met Will for lunch at my usual haunt, Verb cafe. Cathy, its owner was used to seeing Roxanne and I come and go frequently. She winked at me as I walked in with Will. They weren’t too busy and usually Cathy would come by my table for a chat, but she discreetly left us alone. We ordered lunch and I told Will about my second change in fortune.

  ‘Wow you’ll be a millionaire before we leave uni!’ He looked impressed.

  ‘Unlikely.’ I smiled. ‘I think all my assets are currently invested in shoes.’

  We talked about Lost Souls and Jaya and Finn. I could see he was happy for his friend.

  ‘He’s always had trouble with girls understanding his nature. With Jaya, he can finally let go and be who he really is,’ Will said thoughtfully.

  I nodded. We talked for a little longer, before heading out to walk back to the warehouse.

  We hadn’t
gotten far when I heard the shuffle of feet behind us. I looked at Will who had also noticed and we both turned at the same time. A short, blonde haired woman walking very close almost ran into us.

  ‘Excuse me,’ I said loudly, annoyed.

  ‘Sorry, Shalini,’ the woman replied politely.

  She looked vaguely familiar. ‘Do I know you?’ I surveyed the smartly dressed woman in white three quarter pants and a short green linen jacket. She looked mid-fortyish.

  ‘No, but I know you. You run a matchmaking agency.’ The woman had a quick, deep voice. Her head bobbed continuously.

  I was stumped. Where had I seen this woman before? Will was quiet and I gave him a sidelong glance.

  ‘I can go back to the agency with you, so we can talk more privately?’ the woman said bossily.

  ‘We can talk right here.’ I stood my ground. Will moved closer to stand next to me. He guessed that something was wrong.

  ‘Well it’s quite simple you see. I want you to help me find a suitable mate.’ She lowered her tone. ‘I’m a powerful Wiccan and I’m hoping you can find someone who can deal with that.’

  I found it hard to believe this tiny woman was a powerful anything. ‘Well, come by the agency tomorrow morning and we can discuss it.’

  ‘Why can’t we go now?’ the woman persisted.

  I looked at Will. He rescued me. ‘We’re actually about to head off to the movies,’ he said lightly.

  ‘Okay,’ the woman said reluctantly and looked at me. ‘Give me your card and I’ll come tomorrow.’

  ‘My contact details are in The Weekly,’ I said casually, deliberately omitting the Mythical part.

  ‘The Weekly Times?’ the woman asked blankly.

  How could a powerful witch not know about The Mythical Weekly?

  ‘No,’ I said slowly, ‘the other Weekly.’

  ‘Oh right.’ The woman’s gaze darted around.

  ‘Do you know what I’m talking about?’ I was candid.

  ‘Oh I’ve lost my most recent copy,’ the woman said quickly. ‘Give me your address just in case.’

  Against my better judgement I gave the woman the warehouse address. She was tiny and looked no more dangerous than a pesky mouse.

  Will and I looked at her as she scurried away.

  ‘She looks familiar,’ Will said with furrowed eyebrows.

  ‘I know right?’ I said frustrated ‘But where could we have seen her?’

  We continued walking puzzled.

  ‘Bugger!’ Will stopped dead in his tracks. ‘I remember now. She was at the cafe, on the table next to us, reading a magazine.’

  She must have heard everything!

  We decided not to go to the warehouse in case she followed us again. I went home and Will made me promise to let him know if anything happened at the meeting with her tomorrow.

  Chapter 31

  ‘If she is a Wiccan then she should know about us already, all the witches I knew used to get The Mythical Weekly delivered to them,’ Roxanne said placidly the next morning, when I told her about the woman.

  ‘That’s what I thought,’ I mused. ‘I don’t know what possessed me to just give her details on how to find us. I need to start protecting the business better.’

  ‘Maybe she put a spell on you so you had no choice but to tell her?’ Roxanne patted my arm comfortingly.

  ‘I don’t think so.’ I recalled the night of my “virtual” conversation with the Vampire League of Albion, when the female vampire questioned me about Victor and Fiona’s disappearance. The warm uncomfortable feeling cloaking me, and my inability to think or move consciously, that had felt like a truth spell. Just thinking about it made my mouth feel dry.

  ‘No. I think I was just nagged into divulging the information.’ I was cross with myself.

  ‘Well never mind, I’ll be around in case anything should happen.’ Roxanne remained calm.

  This provided little comfort. After all, Roxanne, like me, was only human.

  ***

  It was almost the end of the day and the woman had made no appearance. Will had messaged asking me how it went and I told him she was a no show. Maybe she had forgotten about the agency. At a quarter to five, I heard a knock on the main door of the warehouse office, followed by the sound of a door opening and a ‘hello’. It was the woman.

  ‘Hello,’ I called out.

  ‘Hi, Shalini.’ The woman came up to me as I walked out of my office. I looked at Roxanne, sitting at her reception desk and rolled my eyes slightly.

  ‘What is it?’ the woman asked quizzically. She looked vacantly at the spot where Roxanne was seated.

  Roxanne shuffled in her chair and sat up straighter. The woman looked around the room oblivious to her movements.

  ‘My receptionist is,’ I began, then checked myself, ‘that is, she usually sits right there.’ I pointed at Roxanne.

  ‘Oh, not in today then?’ The woman looked at the spot I pointed to.

  Roxanne bristled. ‘She can’t see me,’ she said bewildered.

  What should I do now?

  I looked away from Roxanne. ‘Yes, she is away sick,’ I said to the woman. ‘Why don’t you come into my office?’ I steered her into the larger room. I gave Roxanne a brief worried glance, who looked equally worried.

  Once seated behind my desk, I asked curtly, ‘Now, what can I do for you?’

  ‘As I said to you yesterday, I am interested in finding a suitable match.’

  ‘Right.’ I became all business. ‘Let’s start with your name?’

  ‘Doris Mavis Lois Marguerite Higginbottom,’ the woman said haughtily.

  Really?

  I cleared my throat. ‘So, Doris, why did you choose to come to Lost Souls?’

  ‘Because I’ve tried so many other ways of meeting men,’ she began earnestly, ‘but none have worked. It’s because of my powers you see.’ She pointed knowingly to her hands. I peered at them.

  ‘Can’t you see the sparks?’ Doris asked.

  ‘I’m sorry, the sparks?’ I saw nothing.

  ‘My hands. Look at them.’ Doris spread her fingers and waved her hands maniacally in the air. I still saw nothing. They looked like ordinary non-sparking hands.

  ‘Can’t you see the sparks coming from my fingers?’ Doris was increasingly exasperated.

  I stared.

  Doris sighed. ‘Ah not many people can see my gifts. I was hoping you would be different since you ran this agency.’

  I was instantly annoyed. What was she insinuating? ‘Is there anything else you can do, other than sparking?’

  Doris gave me a withering look. ‘I can do plenty. But I will not unleash my powers upon you.’

  Oh gees. ‘Doris, I’m quite stringent about what cases I take on.’

  This conversation was going nowhere. Fast.

  ‘I’m glad that you are particular about your cases. I would not come to any old agency you know.’ Doris was smarmy.

  ‘So you can understand my dilemma. I need to ascertain your,’ I paused, ‘well your level of suitability. So far I don’t think Lost Souls is the right agency for you.’ A psychiatric ward might be more likely.

  Doris shot up on the sofa. She looked very much like a tiny elf surrounded by the large leather cushions. ‘Let me read your future for you,’ she said. ‘My predictions are so accurate that you won’t need any convincing.’

  ‘I really don’t need my fortunes read.’ This woman refused to take no for an answer.

  ‘Here, I have my cards with me.’ Doris pulled out a pack of tarot cards from her expensive handbag. She insisted, for the next hour, on reading my future. It was all very general and vague. She picked up cards and laid them down and made the appropriate noises and expressions to go along with her predictions.

  Finally, with Doris predicting my imminent death with every card, I decided to put an end to this. ‘Doris, I’m sorry but I must insist that you leave my office now.’

  ‘So you’ll take me on as a client?’ She gave me a rather
pathetic look.

  ‘Let me think about it.’ Why couldn’t I just refuse her outright?

  ‘Excellent, I’ll be back tomorrow.’ Doris sprang up from the sofa.

  ‘That really won’t be necessary,’ I said quickly. ‘I can ring you.’

  ‘No that’s okay. I’ll come at around eleven in the morning. See you then.’ She hastily picked up her bag and escorted herself out.

  As soon as the main door slammed shut, I emitted the loudest sigh, followed by a rude word that bears no good repeating.

  Chapter 32

  ‘She’s no witch,’ Roxanne exclaimed as soon as Doris left.

  ‘I figured that out in the first minute she was here.’ I sank into the sofa. ‘Why couldn’t she see you?’ I asked but I was distracted by the clock in the room. There was something different about it.

  ‘Well I’m not visible to anyone who has no need to see me. She must have no need to be here,’ Roxanne said.

  ‘The Singh’s could see you easily…’ I kept staring at the clock. I realised with a start what was different about it. It was moving backwards.

  ‘That’s because they were real weres and Jaya, such a lovely girl, had a need to find you and by extension, me as well.’ Roxanne realised I was paying her no attention. ‘Are you okay?’ she asked.

  I stood up and pointed at the clock. ‘Did you wind that recently or do anything to it?’

  ‘No I never come into this room, unless the phone rings.’

  ‘Look at it.’ I walked towards it. ‘Look at its arms!’

  Roxanne drew closer. ‘They’re moving backwards!’ she said sounding as shocked as I was.

  ‘How peculiar.’ I turned to look at Roxanne. ‘You know this clock was already here when I came into the warehouse. We tried to remove it from the wall, but it wouldn’t budge. It just keeps ticking away loudly. I never have to wind it or change the batteries if it even has any.’

  ‘That sounds magical to me.’ Roxanne stepped quickly away from it.

  I couldn’t help but tease. ‘You know for someone who was once married to a warlock, you sure are terrified of magic.’

  ‘That’s because I know how powerful it can be.’ Roxanne’s face was grave.