F*cking Awkward

by Anthology

  My eyes widened at the thought. The press hadn’t been too kind to me after the last two losses. I couldn’t give them any fuel for the fire.

  “Take me to dinner, football God. I’m starving.” Grace smacked my ass, and I straightened, eyebrows raised.

  Playful Grace rocked. Naughty Grace rocked. Okay, all parts that made up Grace rocked, but tonight I was horny. Or, hornier than normal. So playful and naughty were especially welcome.

  “Me too! I’m starvin’. Where’re we going?” Finn ran out of his room wearing a T-shirt, shorts, and a clip-on tie. He had amassed a huge collection of clip-on ties this year. The kid had a wicked good imagination, and he loved playing dress up.

  Problem was, tonight he was dressed up for dinner. Shit.

  Grace knelt in front of Finn. “Super-Finn, I told you earlier. Bethany is babysitting tonight. Dean and I need some alone time.” She tugged on his tie and it released.

  Finn’s lips turned down. “I thought it was the three of us now. We’re like the superheroes on that PJ Masks show. Mom, you’re Owlette, cause she’s the girl. Dean, you’re Catboy cause you’re wearing a blue shirt, and I’m Gecko, cause I’m speedy and can leap off the couch like this.” Finn jumped onto the leather sectional and then surged off, landing on his feet with his arms curled to show his biceps.

  Too fuckin’ cute. But he wasn’t wearing me down. Not this time, anyway. Tonight Big D came first. Well not literally. My girl always came first.

  I crouched down next to Grace. “We are a group of three. I promise we are. But your Mama and I need some adult time. We’ll be home soon and besides, you love Bethany.”

  Bethany walked out of the kitchen holding a DVD and a bag of popcorn. “Movie night, Finn?”

  Finn looked back and forth between Bethany and us. I held my breath. Please, little dude. Help a brother out. One day, many years from now you will understand. You don’t want me to remind you that you were once king of the cockblocks.

  Finn shrugged. “Okay. You guys go eat boring food, and Bethany and I will have a movie party.”

  Big D did a happy dance in my pants.

  And ten minutes later we were on our way to dinner.

  “Oh my God,” Grace moaned as she licked the warm chocolate off her spoon. “This is the best thing I’ve ever had in my mouth.” She smirked and bit her bottom lip. “Well, the second best.”

  “Grace,” I bit out as I shifted in my chair. She had tortured me throughout this whole dinner. Resting her hand on my upper thigh. Moaning when she ate her meal. Running her fingertips up and down the stem of her wine glass. Breathing….

  Man, I was all keyed up. Big D had pitched a tent in my pants after the salad course. We needed to get home. Like yesterday.

  “You ready, Red? I need to bury myself in you tonight.” The need in my own voice was almost scary. I felt like a forty-year-old virgin, touched for the very first time.

  Her signature blush appeared, and I groaned. I threw several hundred dollars on the table, and we walked quickly to the valet. Dinner at North Pond was worth every penny. Grace loved the farm to table food, and I loved how close it was to home. As soon as I heard the click from Grace’s seatbelt, I gunned the engine.

  Grace linked her fingers with mine. “Dean, where are you going?”

  Her voice was low and sexy, and my heart raced, veins pumping. Adrenaline coursed through me. “Home,” I growled and squeezed her hand. “Need you, baby.”

  She leaned closer and kissed my cheek. “It’s too early. They’ll still be watching the movie.”

  Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

  I looked to the side and saw a tennis facility. The dark, empty parking lot brought me right back to high school. Back then we’d drive around the reservoir, looking for a secluded spot to hook up without our parent’s knowledge. Now, a grown-ass-man and all, I was right back to feeling like a teenager. I needed privacy so I could lose myself in Grace. If I could just take the edge off, I’d calm the fuck down.

  I turned right and headed to the back of the lot. I cut the engine and shut off the lights. A low overhead street light was our only illumination. Leaning over, I cupped my hand around the back of Grace’s head and brought her mouth to mine.

  My lips found hers and my tongue traced her lower lip. “If we can’t go home yet, then let’s have some fun here.” I kissed the corner of her mouth and along her jaw. “We’re all alone, and I’m so hard I could puncture metal right now.”

  Grace giggled and pressed her hand down on my aching dick. “Poor baby. Let me take care of you.” She rubbed, and I closed my eyes. I was sure that whimpering sound, like a dog that had been kicked in the belly, did not come from me.

  Grace undid my belt and released me from my pants and boxer briefs. The feel of myself in her hand was heaven. Nirvana. Perfection. I opened my eyes to watch. Her small hand gripped me tightly, and she moved up and down in a slow, teasing rhythm.

  “Grace,” I begged. “More.”

  She paused and leaned closer, kissing me hard. She sucked my lower lip into her mouth and then dragged it out between her teeth.

  Holy fuck.

  Releasing my lip, she brought her luscious mouth to my cock. She licked slowly, like I was her favorite flavored lollipop, never breaking eye contact. Hell yes. She was sex personified – the embodiment of every fantasy I had ever had.

  And then she took all of me in her mouth, bobbing as she increased her suction. My head fell back on the seat rest and my hands balled into fists. Keep it together fuck face. Pretend you don’t feel like a pubescent teen around this woman.

  Tap, tap, tap.

  How was Grace tapping? What was she tapping?

  Tap, tap, tap.

  Grace stilled. Grace was not tapping. The tapping was coming from outside.

  Balls. Shit. Motherfucker.

  Grace moved off me, covering Big D with my dinner jacket. Her eyes were round with horror.

  Mortifying as it was to admit, my first instinct was to scream. Weren’t serial killers stalking parks just like these in the movies? Weren’t they interrupting young lovers so they could bludgeon them with their long, jagged, knives? But then I remembered that I was a goddamned NFL football player, and got myself the fuck together. Pressing the button, I allowed the window to go down about one-third of the way. I was a quarterback, not a fool.

  “Good evening folks,” a male voice spoke and then a badge was placed in our direct sight.

  A police badge.

  Christ almighty, I was blocked again.

  I pushed the button, this time allowing it to roll all the way down.

  “Hello, officer.” I straightened, thankful that Grace sat up as well, but kept her hand firmly planted on my jacket that covered my still hard, but rapidly becoming flaccid, dick.

  “Good evening. You all okay out here? Car broke down? Someone ill?”

  I shook my head. “No sir. I mean, yes, we are fine. No, we aren’t sick.”

  The portly officer rocked back on his heels. “Well, I’m sure you’re aware that you’re on private property then, yes?”

  I shook my head again. “No sir, I wasn’t aware.”

  The officer scratched his chin. “You don’t say?”

  Grace adjusted in her seat, leaning over me to look at the officer. “Officer….” She squinted, trying to read his badge. “Bilger. Officer Bilger, we were just trying to spend a few minutes in peace before we headed home. You see, I have a four-year-old son who loves Dean very much and won’t give us a moment to…well…for….I mean, you know what I mean.”

  The officer chuckled. “I have two little ones at home, ma’am. I understand. But public nudity and fornication is illegal and punishable by,” as he spoke he peered into the car. “Well, I’ll be damned. Dean Goldsmith?”

  I groaned, hoping only Grace heard it. “Yes, sir.”

  “I’m a huge fan. Followed you since the draft. Rough couple of games. You gotta figure something out soon my man…” His voice trailed off and th
en he took a step back. “I see what you’re thinking here. Might help. But you gotta go somewhere else.”

  I laughed this time. “I understand. Thank you, officer.”

  Officer Bilger grinned. “Anything for my team. But, uh…” He took off his hat. “Can I get a picture with you before I go?”

  Grace covered her mouth with her other hand to muffle her giggle.

  “Sure, just give me one second.” I looked at Officer Bilger and then down at my lap.

  He coughed and turned his back to us. I adjusted myself back in my pants, mock glaring at Grace as she snickered.

  Five minutes later, Grace had taken three shots of us, and Officer Bilger and I had several selfies for his collection. He sent us off with a hearty, “Go Bears!”

  As we pulled out of the parking lot, Grace leaned over and dragged her tongue along the shell of my ear. “Shame we got caught, but we’ll finish at home.” I shuddered, and she bit down on my lobe. “Oh, and go Bears!”

  “Red,” I warned, but I couldn’t keep the smile off my face.

  Dear God, let us be able to finish at home. The Bears and I were depending on it.

  We overpaid Bethany and hurried her out the door. Grace pointed to Finn’s room, and I nodded. Bethany said he was sound asleep, so as soon as Grace checked on him, we would be good to go.

  My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I fished it out.

  Jon: Did she ride the baloney pony yet?

  The little dots on my screen indicated that the douchebag was still typing.

  Jon: Is Just-in Beaver happy?

  Seriously? My idiot friends had the maturity of a ten-year-old. I started to type a response when a new text came in. Landon? Aw, fuck. Jon had to start a group text to sufficiently harass my dick.

  Landon: How’s the man in the pink helmet holding up? Time to Poka her hontas?

  Me: Assholes. Fuck you all.

  Ricky: Says the weapon of ass destruction himself.

  Grace stepped in the room. She closed the door and took my phone from my hands. I watched her face as she read, her blush darkening and then a laugh burst from her sweet lips.

  I looked over her shoulder as she typed a response.

  Grace: This is Grace. We’re saying goodbye now. Good night boys.

  She powered off my phone and then tossed it onto the floor. Turning her back to me, she peeked over her shoulder. “He’s asleep. Unzip me.”

  Pulling the zipper down the back of her dress, it fell to her feet. She stepped out, still wearing her sexy-as-fuck heels. Turning to face me, she placed her hand on my chest and pushed me backward. I sat on the bed, a dopey grin on my stupid face.

  Grace was wearing a green satin strapless bra that pushed her tits up high and close together. Hell to the yes. Her matching G-string sat on her hips, and I leaned forward, needing to feel the soft material on my fingers. Needing to feel her… everywhere.

  “Uh, uh. First, we need to get you undressed. Shoes off. I’ll work on your shirt.”

  Bossy Grace rocked.

  Grace’s fingers flew over the buttons on my shirt, as I yanked off my shoes and socks. She peeled the shirt off my shoulders, tossing it aside. I stood, and she pulled off my belt before unhooking my pants and pushing them and my briefs down to the floor.

  I stepped out, fully nude and totally erect. Grace licked her lips, her focus fully on my dick.

  I wagged my finger back and forth. “Uh, uh. My turn.” I pulled her to me, kissing her mouth with desperation. One hand held her head while the other unhooked her bra strap, causing the green fabric to slide down to the floor. Her breasts pressed against my chest, and I moaned into her mouth. I had to slow down, calm down, or this would be over in a nanosecond. My tongue licked hers in languid strokes until her hands found my hair and she tugged, hard.

  “Dean, please. I’m so ready,” Grace whispered as she placed light kisses on my lips.

  “Me too, baby.” I took a step back and then knelt on the ground, kissing her on top of her panties.

  “Oh, God,” Grace cried. Her legs shook until I stood up, sweeping her into my arms.

  I laid her on the bed and tore off her panties. Then I climbed over her, my weight on my forearms. “I love you, Red. I’ve never been this happy before. Even when football sucks like it does now, having you in my life makes it all okay.”

  Grace’s eyes shined. “I love you, too.” She tilted her chin up and kissed my lips, her sweet tongue pushing in and tangling with mine.

  “Dean, do you have a gina too, or just a penis?” A voice that sounded just like Finn’s asked, very close to my ear and my naked body.

  What. The. Fuck.

  Grace squeaked, grabbing the sheet and pulling it around both of us. I rolled off the kid’s mom, immediately calculating how much money and years of therapy it would take to erase this image from his mind.

  “Finn! What are you doing in here? Why aren’t you asleep? It’s so late!” Grace’s face was bright red, and her voice was high with panic.

  “I had to pee-pee. I didn’t want to wet my bed and then have to wear pull-ups again.”

  Grace looked at me sideways, mouthed “I’m sorry” and then closed her eyes.

  “So do you, Dean? Do you have a gina like my mama?”

  I stilled, but then I pictured the view he had when he surprised us. “No little dude, that’s my butt. Guys have penises and girls have vagina’s remember? And everybody has a butt.” Oh, if Jon and Landon could hear me now.

  “Okay, that’s it.” Grace grabbed her robe from the drawer next to her. She swung her legs out of bed, tightening the robe before standing up. “Say goodnight, Finn.”

  “Good night Finn!” Finn giggled and blew me a kiss.

  I managed a crooked smile back and fell back on the pillow.

  Cockblocked. Again.

  Fifteen minutes later Grace walked back in the room and locked the door behind her. “He’s asleep. I even whispered in his ear about Superman being here to double check. This,” she pointed her thumb toward the door knob, “needs to be locked anytime we’re naked. From now on.” Then she shuddered. “That sucked balls.”

  Mmmm Grace sucking my balls…Big D got a second wind.

  Grace’s eyes widened as the sheet rose in front of me. “Well, I’m glad there was no permanent damage to your manhood after that jarring incident,” she giggled as she untied her robe.

  There was no more giggling. My entire body jumped into ready mode at the sight of Grace’s curvy naked figure walking toward me. Grace pulled back the sheet and straddled me.

  “No more talking,” she said as she placed a finger over my lips. I nodded, catching her finger and giving it a quick bite. Grace moved onto her knees and took my cock in her hand, using it to rub back and forth over her opening.

  My back arched. “Yes, baby.”

  Grace held me in her hand and then slammed down on me, fast and hard. She covered my mouth with hers at the same time, allowing us to swallow each other’s groans and screams of pleasure.

  And then Grace rode me. She rode the hell out of me.

  Grace on top totally rocked.

  Grace moved up and down, slamming onto me over and over again, as I pushed up to meet her. When she touched her tits, her eyes wild and dazed, I almost lost control. But I held on, and she came hard, clenching me and pulling me into her deeper.

  I came with a shout and moved her hips back and forth slowly until I had milked out every second of my release.

  Grace fell onto my chest, kissing my nipples and then right over my heart. “I’m sorry about Finn.”

  Her face was pinched with worry and my heart melted. “Grace, I knew you had a son before we started dating. Now that we’re getting married, we have a son. One day I hope we’ll have a bunch more little Goldsmith’s trying to sneak into the bedroom. It’s a part of life.” I sat up, cradling her on my lap. “As long as we stay focused on what’s important, we’ll be fine.”

  She cupped my jaw with hand, her fingers ca
ressing my stubbly cheek. “And what’s that?”

  “Always lock the door, and make sure the little cockblockers are sound asleep before we bump uglies.”

  Grace scrunched her nose at me, and I kissed it in return.

  “Deal?” I asked as we lay down.

  “Deal,” she responded with a sigh.

  Grace fell asleep in my arms, but I stayed awake for a while. I used the bathroom, unlocked the door, and checked on Finn.

  I loved my family, cockblockers and all.

  Fact was, Big D ended the night happy. And my team ended up winning Sunday’s game.

  Go Bears.

  The End

  * * *

  Laura Ward is the author of Not Yet, Until Now, and Past Heaven, as well as the co-author of The Pledge. She lives in Maryland with her loud and very loving three children and husband. Laura married her college sweetheart and is endlessly grateful for the support he has given her through all their years together, and especially toward her goal of writing books. When not picking up toy trucks, driving to lacrosse practice, or checking spelling homework, Laura is writing or reading romance novels.

  Laurawardauthor.com

  My Kind of Girl

  Lex Martin

  Clementine, you can do this.

  These people probably think I’m crazy, sitting here with my lips tugged over my teeth like I’m pretending to be someone’s granny who lost her falsies.

  The sounds of the student union rush around me as I try to visualize what I’m going to do to my boyfriend tonight.

  Because I need to visualize.

  I so need to visualize.

  Which sounds stupid. Any nimrod with a mouth can give a blow job.

  Except I want this to be good for Gavin.

  Really good.

  Like I’m studying for a final, I mentally review the suggestions my roommate Jenna gave me this morning. Lick the tip because it’s sensitive. Provide some suction. Get my hands into the action. Use spit to lube it up.

  I try to shake off the heebie jeebies I get from the idea of spitting on him. I mean, I’m putting the man’s jungle rod in my mouth. I suppose I can live with a little spit.