by Anne Herries
‘I am sure I do not know what you mean,’ she said, but could not meet his eyes, for she knew exactly what he was referring to. She had ignored his advice concerning the earl. ‘I hope Lord Ravenscar goes on well, sir. I am fond of him—we all are.’
‘Yes, I dare say. He thinks of you as a daughter.’
‘Thank you.’ Lucy swallowed miserably. Why must they always quarrel, when all she wanted was to see approval in his eyes? She lifted her head proudly. ‘Goodnight, sir.’
‘Lucy—’ Paul began, but was interrupted as some more guests came into the hall. For a moment he seemed to hesitate and she was surprised by the look in his eyes, as if he would have said something important, but then he nodded his head. ‘Goodnight. I wish you happy...’
She stood blinking as he went out. Her heart was aching. At times he could be so like his old self that she was reminded sharply of everything that had gone before—and yet at other times that look of reserve was in his eyes.
Paul had changed. He was not the carefree, young man she’d known before his brother’s death.
She would be a fool to pine for something she could never have. Lifting her head, she went to say goodnight to more guests.
* * *
Lucy was kept busy for another thirty minutes saying goodnight to her friends and neighbours. When she returned to the ballroom to find it all but empty, she saw that Daventry was having a glass of wine with her father and Judith was standing with her mother.
‘I think I shall go up now,’ Lucy said. ‘It was a lovely evening, Mama. I thank you and Papa for arranging it for me.’ She smiled brightly at George Daventry. ‘Goodnight, sir. I shall see you in the morning. Are you ready to go up, Judith?’
‘I am just coming. Goodnight, everyone,’ Judith said and then came to take Lucy’s arm. They walked from the room together. ‘Well, that all went as it ought, I think. You did not sit down once, dearest—and I also only had one dance without a partner.’
‘I am sure you would not have had that had Captain Ravenscar not been delayed.’
Judith laughed, a look of mischief in her face. ‘He is trying to arouse my interest, because we got off on the wrong foot,’ she said. ‘He did not care for my indifference at the start and is piqued. I allowed him three dances this evening, but when he comes to Bath I shall see... I have not yet made up my mind to have him, though I find him good company and he is attractive.’
‘Captain Ravenscar will inherit the title and his father’s estate. Ravenscar is quite a large estate.’
Lucy wondered why she was singing his praises. Did she wish her cousin to marry him?
‘Yes, I know he is wealthy, but I have money of my own,’ Judith reminded her. ‘I should require more than mere wealth. I am not sure of his ambition. A man with ideals or a voice in the world is probably what would suit me. If Ravenscar would take his seat in the House one day...I think a role as a political hostess in London would suit me well.’
‘I thought you wished to travel?’
‘Yes, that is my intention, but not for ever. One day I shall hope to return to London—and I enjoy entertaining. Sir Michael had some embassy experience and we had a varied acquaintance.’
‘P—Captain Ravenscar said you thought of buying a house in Bath?’
‘I have thought of it,’ Judith replied. ‘I am as yet unsure where my future lies.’
Lucy stared at her, not sure if she approved. She had thought her cousin amusing, beautiful and clever...but if she merely intended to use Paul until something better came along...that was not kind in her.
Lucy felt distressed at the thought that he might discover the truth too late and spend the rest of his life regretting his marriage.
Why should she care how he felt? He did not care that he had hurt her feelings.
‘You seemed to enjoy yourself dancing with Daventry,’ Judith said and gave her a thoughtful look. ‘I believe he means to make you an offer, Lucy—shall you take him?’
‘I...I don’t know,’ Lucy replied. ‘I like him but...’ She sighed and shook her head. ‘As yet I am not sure of the earl’s intentions. He has not hinted that he is serious.’
‘Oh, I am certain of it,’ Judith murmured, a glint in her eyes. ‘Yes, I believe he will speak to you soon, my dear Cousin—and you should be ready with your answer, for he will not take kindly to being asked to wait, I assure you.’
‘Oh...’ Lucy caught her breath. She had enjoyed the earl’s attentions that night, but a part of her knew that the reason she had laughed so much in his company was because she’d wanted to show Paul that she did not care if he preferred her cousin.
But she did...she did...
Chapter Seven
Lucy rode over to take her leave of Jenny and Lord Ravenscar the day before she was due to go to Bath. Judith had engaged herself to drive with Charles Benson and her groom and George Daventry accompanied Lucy to Ravenscar.
‘I would like to see Lord Ravenscar for a little while,’ Lucy said when they arrived at the house. ‘Perhaps you would keep Mrs Miller company, sir.’
‘Of course. You must do whatever you please, Miss Lucy. I am your servant, as ever.’
‘Thank you,’ Lucy said. He helped her down from her horse but did not hold her in his arms longer than necessary.
When they went into the house, they discovered that Jenny was busy, but both Adam and Paul were at home. Lucy greeted them with a smile and then the housekeeper took her upstairs to Lord Ravenscar’s apartments.
She was delighted to find that he was sitting in a chair fully dressed with a light rug over his knees and went to him with a cry of pleasure.
‘You look much better, sir,’ she said. ‘I am so glad that you have recovered.’
‘I feel better than I did,’ he replied. ‘Your pretty face must always cheer me, my dear. How are you now?’ He studied her face. ‘You seem less unhappy than you were. I should be glad to think that you had recovered from your grief. Mark would not have wished you to be unhappy, Lucy. You have shown your respect for him and now you must think of your own life.’
‘I know it,’ she agreed. ‘I did miss him so terribly, as we all did—but I am happier now. Mama is taking my cousin and me to Bath and Lord Daventry is to escort us. We shall have many friends there for the London Season is well over and everyone will go to Bath.’
‘Yes, I dare say. You young things are forever here and there...’ He smiled and patted her hand.
Lucy talked to him for a few minutes longer and then went downstairs to the parlour. The sound of Jenny’s voice told her that her friend had returned from her errand and she went in, pausing on the threshold.
‘May I join you?’ she asked shyly.
‘Of course, Lucy. We were waiting for you to come down.’ Jenny came to her at once and kissed her cheek.
‘I am glad you came to say goodbye before you left,’ she said. ‘I wanted to tell you what has been decided. Paul will join you in Bath for a few days and when he returns we shall go home for a while.’
‘Then I am glad I came indeed,’ Lucy said. ‘I hope I shall see you again before too long.’
‘I dare say we shall visit here again in a few months,’ Jenny said. ‘But by then you may be married...’
Lucy felt her cheeks heat and hoped that the earl was not looking at her. Her eyes sought Paul and she saw that his were narrowed, his mouth pulled into a tight line. Why? Did he care if she married someone else?
‘Who knows what may happen?’ Lucy managed to reply with a laugh. ‘I know Mama would be pleased, but she does not push me into it, you know. I dare say my cousin may marry before me. I believe she desires her own establishments in London and Bath so that she can set up her salon...and she desires a companion to travel with her when she wishes for it.’
Lucy saw Paul’s q
uick frown and wondered at it. Had he been ignorant of her cousin’s plans for the future? Did he imagine that Judith would be happy to settle here at Ravenscar for months at a time? Lucy did not think it would suit Judith to be in the country for long.
‘Your cousin has been married before,’ Jenny said. ‘I have been hearing that she was well known as a hostess in London when her husband lived. She enjoyed inviting poets and writers, as well as singers and men of intellect, to her soirées.’
‘Yes, I believe so,’ Lucy said. ‘I had no idea of it and thought her to be a sad and lonely widow when my uncle asked us to take her in for a time.’
‘I dare say she had been living in isolation for some months after her husband died,’ Jenny said. ‘She told me she had every intention of entertaining on a grand scale once she was in the position to do so. I suppose she looks for a husband of some importance on the social scale.’
‘I do not know,’ Lucy replied, feeling a little guilty at having been drawn into a discussion of her cousin in her absence. Paul was watching her and she sensed disapproval in him—but was not sure what had caused it.
She happened to glance at George Daventry and found him looking thoughtful, but as refreshments were brought in then she had no time to ask him what lay behind that expression of speculation.
She had chosen a seat near the window, but Jenny had moved closer to the centre of the room to dispense tea and comfits, also wine to those who preferred it. Lucy was therefore alone when Paul brought his cup and came to sit beside her on the small sofa.
‘Your cousin did not care to visit with you today?’ he asked as he stretched out his long legs, his gleaming boots crossed one over the other.
He looked so handsome that Lucy caught her breath, picking up the clean scent of his linen and some light fragrance that wafted about him.
‘Judith had an engagement to drive out with Charles Benson,’ she replied as casually as she could. ‘She asked me to say all that was proper and hopes to see you in Bath next week.’
‘At the moment I see no reason why I should not come down for a day or two,’ Paul replied. ‘My father, as you have discovered for yourself, seems very well. Adam and Jenny stay here until I return. This is their home as much as mine and they spend a great deal of time here—but Adam and Jenny have things they must do at their own estate.’
‘You must be glad of their company,’ Lucy said. ‘A house like this is too big for two people.’
‘Yes, indeed it is,’ Paul said. ‘I know my father’s wishes upon that matter and I must attempt to oblige him sooner rather than later—perhaps I shall do so before too long.’
He was thinking of offering for Judith.
Lucy’s heart contracted with pain. He must truly love her if he was thinking of offering for her, because he must know that Judith preferred to live in town. Indeed, she would hardly be content here for longer than a few weeks. Would Paul be happy with a wife who spent most of her time in London entertaining her friends?
‘I must wish you success, then,’ she said and saw his quick frown. ‘I should like to see this house filled with company, as it used to be. I remember the balls and the grand picnics in the gardens when your father entertained.’
‘Yes, it was a happy place then,’ Paul replied and again she saw a thoughtful look in his eyes. ‘The right woman could make it a home again—Jenny does very well for us, but we have not entertained much for a long time, and she has her own home. If Father continues well, I shall begin to ask a few friends to dine soon.’
‘Yes, you should...’ Lucy looked up as George Daventry came to sit on a chair close to them. ‘Captain Ravenscar was speaking of opening the house up again soon. It would be pleasant to have a ball here as we used to do, I think.’
‘Yes, indeed, for it is a magnificent house, sir,’ George agreed. ‘You like to dance, Miss Lucy—and it suits you. I dare say we shall be invited to some private dances in Bath, but a ball here would indeed be a pleasure.’
‘Yes...’ Lucy put down her cup and stood up, aware of an undercurrent of tension between the two gentlemen, though she did not understand it. ‘I think we ought to return, sir. Mama will be concerned if we are too long, for she does not want me to be tired tomorrow. I am so glad to have seen you all before I left.’
‘You must write to me when you return to Dawlish after your stay in Bath,’ Jenny said. ‘If you have no other arrangements, you might care to come to us for a week or two?’
‘I should very much like that...if Mama has no other plans,’ Lucy said, though she knew it was her own plans that Jenny meant—for she, like others, was expecting news of a wedding before too long.
Lucy’s heart skidded in her breast as she saw the expression in Paul’s eyes. He had taken Jenny’s meaning and the censure was plain to see.
Jenny thought that Lucy might be engaged when she returned from Bath. She was aware of a fluttering in her stomach. Had she given her friends reason to think it was settled with the earl? If she had done so, she wished that she had been more discreet. Lucy had thought that her mind was made up, but suddenly she was unsure again. Would she be wise to marry without love?
Could that bring anything but unhappiness in the long run? The thought of living with a man she only moderately liked as her husband brought Lucy to the reality of her thoughts.
Was she truly ready to give up all thought of love?
Jenny walked out to the door with them as their horses were brought round from the stables. Jenny’s groom held her horse, but it was George Daventry who helped her to mount before going to mount his own horse. Sitting tall in the saddle, Lucy looked at Paul standing just outside the house and found his eyes intent on her. Her heart jerked and she hoped for a smile, but he remained grave and thoughtful, as she waved to her friends and then moved off with the earl and her groom following.
Just what was in Paul’s mind when he spoke of his future marriage? On the night of her ball, he had seemed to be courting Judith, but something in his voice...in his look that morning...
Lucy kept her sigh inside her. It was ridiculous to let herself hope again, for she had made up her mind never to think of Paul in that way. She had been sure that it was her cousin he preferred...though Lucy was certain that Judith would not make him happy...
Lucy felt a pang of despair. It was all such a tangle. A man she liked very well but did not love was courting her—and the man she did love seemed to go from liking her to indifference and back.
What was she to make of it all?
* * *
Paul watched as the earl lifted Lucy into the saddle. He clenched his fists at his sides, an unreasonable anger striking through him. What right had that rogue to touch her? Damn him! He was not good enough to kiss her feet.
Paul had hoped that his hints about marriage would arouse some reaction in her, but instead she’d seemed to withdraw. Had he left it all too late? He felt regret swathe through him, for he must take a wife in time—but no other woman would truly content him.
‘I think Lucy looks much better this morning,’ Jenny said, recalling his thoughts. ‘When she first came to visit us after her return from Italy she seemed too quiet, a different girl, but she laughs more now and I think she is over her distress at last.’
‘She grieved for Mark a long time,’ Paul said as they turned and walked back into the house.
‘If it was grief for Mark...’ Jenny said. ‘I had thought there might be something more to her distress, someone else she cared for—but of course she has not told me anything. Whatever it was, I think she is over it now.’
Paul murmured something appropriate, but he was thoughtful as he went up the stairs to his bedchamber. Was it possible that Lucy had felt something towards him...as he’d half-believed before Mark died?
His mind was reeling from Jenny’s casual statement. It had taken him a
long time to come to terms with his own feelings of guilt, but recently he’d begun to realise that he need not have tortured himself as he had.
If the letter he’d found in Mark’s things meant what he suspected, then he would not be stealing his brother’s intended bride. He needed to investigate further to be sure...but what if his suspicions were proved true?
He was not sure that Lucy felt more than friendship for him now, though for a moment during their drive, as they laughed over old times, he thought there might be more...but her mood had changed suddenly.
Why? What had he done or said to upset her? He could think of nothing, but he had not been mistaken in her withdrawal.
And she had been so pleased to see Daventry. She had danced with him twice at the ball and seemed to laugh at everything he said to her. Was she considering taking him if he asked? He could not help thinking she would regret it, for he knew something of Daventry’s past—something unpleasant that would distress Lucy if she should learn of it. Of course, it would be a dishonourable act to tell her with the deliberate intention of making her distrust the earl—but perhaps he ought. She had seemed enchanted with the man at her dance...
It occurred to Paul that he had danced with Lady Sparrow three times. She, of course, was not an innocent young lady, but a widow with experience of the world and there was no question of his arousing hopes in her breast, for she had told him she looked for a comfortable husband.
Lady Sparrow was not looking for love. She had money and she wanted a husband to be a companion and accompany her on her trips overseas. She also planned to have a salon in London and entertain a great deal, but she could, if she wished, hold her dinners and balls at Ravenscar when the Season was over. If they should marry...
Paul had discovered that he liked the merry widow. She had a sense of adventure and liked to laugh, ignoring the strictures that governed ladies of her class, at least in the smaller things. He thought she would make a pleasant companion—and if he must marry...
