by Lara Frater
I thought of the cocoa I had last night. No whipped cream and we didn’t take marshmallows. I made sure that the essentials were taken, canned beans, meat, vegetables, and then we trolled the aisles for frivolous foods. I took ten bags of different kinds of chocolate but didn’t think to take marshmallows. I had two chocolates a day after dinner. I thought that we might never get new shipments of chocolate. Whatever left on the shelves was it. No other imported fruit like bananas, grapefruit, pineapple, oranges. I haven’t had orange juice in almost two years. We have a lot of canned pineapple juice. Jim wants to try to pick farmland that has apple and pear trees. We can plant all kinds of berries but it was too cold for oranges.
I wondered about the state of the South or California? I wonder if we can ever make a road trip to Florida to get oranges.
I thought about making my own marshmallows, before I fell asleep.
Chapter 4
Day in and day out, we stayed on the boat. It was tedious with the same routine every day. I wished for change and got it with food poisoning.
It started in the morning. I was asleep when Henry woke me on a mad dash to the deck only wearing slippers and a robe. I didn’t think anything of it. Every other day it seemed Henry was running from the room to barf. Then I felt a strong wave of nausea. Lying down kept it from coming up immediately, but I knew I had seconds before it made an appearance.
I jumped out of bed, grabbed my robe and slippers because I had no time to get into boots.
I almost didn’t make it. I had to cover my mouth to stop the vomit from coming, I felt the disgusting taste in my mouth and felt its texture in my palms. When I got to the deck, I saw three other people besides Henry and me throwing up. I didn’t care, I went to the side and my entire dinner came out and hit the choppy water. Everything I ate was gone and still more came up. Stomach cramps rode in waves like the sea ahead of me, forcing up everything in my digestive system.
When I couldn’t vomit up any more, when only bile came up, I turned around. Despite the fact that it was freezing outside I was both sweating and shivering. My legs had turned to jelly and I slid down to the cold deck. I couldn’t move, but I managed to open my eyes. The other people vomiting were Jim, Dave, Henry and Mike.
Mike similarly sat on the deck like me. He looked white as a sheet. Jim and Dave still were over the edge. Henry was lying on a lounge chair, with his eyes squeezed shut, holding his gut.
The door opened and I figured it was another person about to lose their dinner. It was Hannah, she wore boots but not her glasses. She didn’t throw up and she didn’t look white as Mike. Instead she came over to me.
“You too?”
“What’s going on?” I shivered uncontrollably.
“I think it’s food poisoning.”
“From where?”
“I don’t know yet. When you feel like you’ve finished, go back to bed. Do you have water in your room? Does Henry?”
“I have. I don’t know about Henry.”
“I’ll bring two just in case. Try to drink as much as possible. I don’t want to bring out the saline, but I will if you can’t get water down.” She gave me a box of wipes. I used them to clean off my hand.
That was the least of my worries. I felt hot and cold at the same time. My stomach gurgled in protest.
“Anyone else sick?” I managed to croak out.
“Everyone but Dena, Grace and me. Keith won’t come out of his room, but he says it’s not bad. I don’t know why he barricaded the door. I guess he’s afraid.” He was but I didn’t tell Hannah why. “It hit Tanya, Eric and the kids early this morning. Also please go down to the swim platform if you have diarrhea.”
“There’s diarrhea too?”
I shit into the freezing cold air and felt the icy drops of water hitting my butt. I thought everything I ate came out of my mouth but apparently that wasn’t true. Right now I was grateful to be alone but the deck was filthy indicating I wasn’t the only one with a problem. Hannah had given me something anti-diarrhea medicine and I prayed it worked soon. I shit where rich people had once jumped off for a cool swim. I mooned the zombies, worried that some floater would come by and bite my ass. I began to cry. I didn’t care if anyone heard me. I was humiliated. I missed Mark, I wanted him to bring me broth. I missed running water and having a bathroom where I could shit in private.
After either I finally emptied my stomach or the medication worked, I wiped myself, dumping the wipes into the water. I pulled my pants up, walked to the edge of the swim platform and dumped my slippers now covered with filth into the ocean. I didn’t care how cold my feet were as I took the ladder back to the deck. Dave and Jim were sitting on lounge chairs, looked white, pale, unsure about what to do. Neither said anything to me, nor I to them. I walked back inside without a word
No one was in the salon. I went to the bedroom and crawled back to bed; stripping almost everything because I didn’t know if any of the platform shit got on me. Henry was wrapped up in a blanket on his side of the bed.
I wished Henry was gone, even though he was asleep. I wanted to crawl in bed alone and die. I felt really hot but I also shivered uncontrollably.
I don’t know how much time passed before Hannah came. She looked sweaty herself.
“You too?” I asked. She nodded. I knew she didn’t like me, but we shared this moment.
“Dena and Grace?”
“So far, so good.” Figured the bitches would be fine.
She left a bottle of water for me and one for Henry. She put a bottle of pills on my night stand.
“It’s a seven day course of antibiotics and a bunch of Tylenol. One for you, one for Henry. Can you make sure he takes it?”
“I will, thanks,” I said. “Go rest.”
“Drink your water and--” She didn’t finish her sentence. She ran from the room holding her mouth.
I did as she asked. I took the pills with a few sips of water. My stomach complained but kept it down.
“Henry?”
He didn’t respond. He felt warm and alive, so I figured he was sleeping. I could bother him later about the antibiotics.
Just being in the cold air, I shivered uncontrollable. I covered myself up and held the blanket close but then I felt hot. Wishing for Mark or my mother to comfort me, bring me soup. At least Henry was a warm body, but I wanted someone I loved.
Just the idea that I’ll never see Mark or my parents, I began to cry again. I buried my head into the pillow to stop myself from wailing. I wanted this to be a bad dream. I wanted to wake up in a world with no flu or zombies.
My crying didn’t wake Henry.
“Did you drink?” a stoic female voice said breaking me out of my sleep.
The Tylenol had worked somewhat. I felt less hot, not shivering as much and I managed to sleep. My tongue felt dry, yucky and tasted like old puke. I needed to brush my teeth.
I peeled open my eyes to see Grace looking at me with her pissed off expression. The expression was “I don’t want to do this.”
“Everyone is sick,” she said. “Hannah said you should all drink water. Did you drink?”
“A little.”
“Drink more.” I hated that she was standing over me, lecturing me but I grabbed the bottle and drank two mouthfuls. That seemed to satisfy her.
“What about him?” she said, referring to Henry.
“I don’t know.” I nudged him a little and he groaned. I looked at the water bottle Hannah left. It hadn’t been touched. I touched Henry again.
“Henry, wake up and drink some water.”
He didn’t respond. I lifted up the blanket and felt his forehead. It was like touching a hot stove.
“He’s got a bad fever,” I told her. She didn’t look like she cared. “We should cool him down. Can you help me get him to the shower?”
“We’re out of bathing water.”
“We still have to cool him off.”
“Drop him in the ocean.”
I looked at her but she w
as dead serious.
“Won’t that make it worse?”
“Better he freeze or burn up? We can dip him from swim deck.” Great back to the same disgusting swimming deck.
I got up. My head felt like it was swimming. “Get Dena, we can use all the help we can get. Unless she’s sick.”
“She doesn’t appear to be.”
“Go get her and anyone who can help. Ask Hannah if we should do this.”
Grace looked annoyed at being given orders, but she left the room. When she was gone, I swung my legs around the bed. A wave of nausea hit but nothing came up. I felt only slightly better than I had this morning, but I still felt weak. There was no way I could carry Henry on my own.
I heard footsteps. Grace had left the door open. She reappeared outside the door with Dena and Keith. Dena looked fine. Keith looked a little pale but he seemed steady on his feet.
“Mom says not to dip him in the water, but to put him on the swim deck and cool him with towels with cold water on his forehead, the back of his neck, armpits and umm-- groin. She says to do it on the swim deck. You don’t want to get the bedroom wet. Only dip him if the towels don’t help.”
“I’m going to need help carrying him.”
Dena came into my room, and motioned for Keith to follow her. They moved Henry to a seated position. He didn’t respond to their moments.
“Henry, wake up,” Dena said.
Henry opened his eyes but they looked unfocused.
“We have to cool you off but we can’t carry you. You have to stand. We need to talk a short walk to the swim deck.”
“I don’t want to go there,” he said, his voice low and slightly garbled. “They’re waiting.”
“Grace will be on look out,” Dena said, her voice stern. I’ve never seen her like this. “Now get up.”
I heard the moaning as soon as we got to the deck. Henry was right. The platform had been left open and we had a visitor. I dumped Henry gently on one of the lounge chairs. I didn’t have a gun but Grace did. I looked over the ladder to see half a bloated corpse moving around the deck like a flopping fish. Probably attracted to our shit. I tasted bile in my mouth.
“I’ll kill it,” Grace told me. “If you remove it.”
“I kind of want to stop barfing.”
“Just kill the stupid thing,” this came from Dena.
Grace looked over the edge, the thing moaned louder. A single shot and it stopped. Before anyone could volunteer, Keith climbed over the ladder and made his way down. I didn’t look but I heard the splash.
Keith came back up. Now we had to get Henry down.
While leaving the platform open invited the zombie, the water had cleaned away some of the filth. This time I managed to put on my boots but I left my coat even though it was freezing. I didn’t want it to get dirty.
Even though Henry helped by not being such a dead weight, it was a pain in the ass to carry him when I felt like crap. Grace helped but she didn’t look happy. Keith looked 90 pounds soaking wet and Dena was petite. Being a big tall girl most of it came on me. And with every movement, my stomach made gurgling sounds.
I ended up being the one to strip him which I did to his underwear. Dena got towels and was standing on the swim deck soaking them. Mike should be proud to see how well she handled herself in a crisis.
She handed me the freezing cold towels which I put on his forehead. Keith helped me lift him to put them on the back of his neck. I put one on his groin and each armpit. Then I used another towel to sponge him down. I shivered anytime the freezing water touched me. I couldn’t imagine being what it was like being in the water now.
“To cold,” he said and began to shiver.
“Just give it five minutes.”
He didn’t respond. I pulled the towel off his forehead. He felt cooler.
“I need a dry towel.” Keith handed me one and I covered Henry with it.
“Annie--” he whispered. He tried to reach out to touch me. I worried he would die on this platform. Instead his teeth began to chatter. I removed all the towels, dumping them in a pile in the corner, one fell in the water, but I didn’t care.
Keith and I dragged him across the deck unto some cushions and dry towels and blankets. His body was icy and his brown eyes were opened wide. I put one blanket around him. I didn’t want to get him overheated.
“That sucked,” he said. “I hate being here. More will come.” He looked out towards the water. “Can you close the swim deck when we’re finished?” I asked Dena. She nodded.
“Can you walk?” I felt nauseous but since I only had water nothing came up.
He tried to stand but wavered. He could walk but he needed our help. Keith and I helped him up. Dena stood in the corner, waiting for us to leave. Grace followed us from behind, her rifle slung to her shoulders, but she was looking at the water probably for more floaters. None came.
It took some effort but we got Henry up the ladder and on to the deck. My robe was soaked as was my pants. Keith and I helped him inside and I heard the sound of the swim deck shut.
We walked Henry into the salon. I tossed off my boots, not caring where they landed. Fatigue overcame me and I was desperate to get back to bed.
I was feeling like utter crap so I when I dropped Henry into the bed, I collapsed with him even though my pants and robe were damp. I felt someone cover me with a blanket.
“Thanks, Keith.”
“You’re welcome,” Grace replied.
When I woke up it was dark and I had no idea what time it was. For a moment I thought everything was a bad dream and Mark was next to me, but that faded immediately and cold reality hit me. Mark, My parents, my friends, my life were never coming back.
I didn’t have a fever and was freezing. I wrapped the blanket around me tight. I shivered but not as bad as before. Now it was the regular cold of winter and a boat with rationed heat.
“Henry,” I whispered, suddenly frightened that he had died in the night. That I had a cold dead corpse next to me but I could feel his warmth and heard his breathing.
“Yea,” he said, his voice low.
“You feeling better?”
“Yes, now I’m freezing.” I realized he was probably still wearing only underwear.
“Did you drink any water?” I couldn’t see in the dark.
“A little. If I drink too much I feel sick.”
He probably needed to drink more but I didn’t want to pressure him. I figured if it got worse maybe Hannah could give him an IV.
“Do you want me to get you some clothes?”
“Just an extra blanket.” We kept four blankets on the bed, so I covered him with my extra one. I took off my damp robe and hung it to dry.
He didn’t say anything. I thought he had fallen asleep. I was about to join him.
“We won’t be together after we get off the boat?” He started me because it had been at least a minute since we spoke last and it came out from left field.
“Yes,” I said with no hesitation. I didn’t want to be with Henry or anyone for a while. “Are you okay with that?”
“It’s cool,” he said, but his voice cracked a little so I knew it wasn’t really cool. I felt bad. I didn’t mean to lead him on with something this serious. I wanted to say I’m sorry. It wasn’t fair to either of us. He wasn’t Mark. He was one bed in a string of warm bodies. I thought about the other men I was with, Jake, and Harlan. I felt bad for trying to force Jake into a relationship and leading Harlan on when I couldn’t get Jake for myself. Ironically the best relationship I had was with Mindy. I enjoyed her strength and her willingness to survive. Her death hit me harder than Jake and Harlan. I wished she was here now. Instead her body was nothing but ash on top of the Costking.
“When we’re better, do you want me to go? I can ask Jim to switch things around. I’ll even bunk with Grace.”
“Nah, you shouldn’t torture yourself,” he said and laughed. “You stay here until we’re off the boat.” He took my hand. “It’s bet
ter to keep warm unless you want me to go.”
“No,” That made me feel even worse. I didn’t pull my hand away.
It took a week before everyone fully recovered. In the interim nothing got done. It snowed and no one cleared the deck. No one took watch except for Grace who took her normal hours and Dena kept a look out during the day. At least we saved food by not eating.
No one knew the source of the food poisoning.
I sat with the others in the Salon along with Tanya, Mike, Dave, Jim and Hannah as we discussed what happened. The rest either didn’t want to come or weren’t up to it.
Mike and Dave both liked to fish and had fried up a bunch for dinner the night before along with rice and beans. The left over fish had be left outside to keep cold. I thought it was the fish, the most likely culprit and the preferred one. It meant that we could keep all our food, but Grace had it and not any of the rice and beans and Henry had the rice and beans but no fish.
“It could have been one can,” Jim said. “Or something got left out too long. The rice, maybe.”
“You wanna risk it?”
“Risk or not,” Mike said. “If we have to toss the rice and beans from the same manufacturer, we’re talking about a pretty major amount of supplies. We may not have enough canned food to last for the winter. We may settle with nothing but emergency food. We don’t know how long it will be before we get farming right. We need a good amount of supplies saved up. Maybe we should make another supply run.”
I thought about all the food that we had left at Costking.
“I wouldn’t recommend it,” Hannah said. “The boat is only slightly warmer than outside. Anyone who gets too chilled may have issues warming up. Look what happened with Henry.” She was right. Henry still hadn’t fully recovered from the food poisoning and his cold water sponge bath. It was unseasonably cold. The temperatures always remained around freezing. Walking to the bridge, you got hit by the icy biting winds of the sea. Ice had formed everywhere on the boat. Mike used the extra kerosene and used the engine to run the heaters, despite that this ship wasn’t meant to be in a Long Island winter. I knew because I read the manifest. It wintered in Bermuda.
