Giving Up for You

by L. M. Carr

  Again, brain to mouth filter is broken. “Uh . . . maybe the girls can set up a play date sometime.”

  “What?” Adam and Gina respond in unison.

  “No!”

  “Absolutely not!”

  It’s like they’ve rehearsed their synchronized answers.

  “Sorry.” I toss my palms up to calm them both down. Damn, I thought it might be nice for the girls, but I guess I was wrong.

  “Soph, we have to go.” She holds her hand out. “Time’s up.” She gives Adam the nastiest look I’ve ever seen. He’s completely unfazed by her. His face remains impassive as he looks at her blankly. Honestly, it’s a little daunting.

  Gina turns and lets herself out without saying another word to anyone. God, she really is a bitch.

  The kids run downstairs to finish watching their movie. I am faced with an angry looking man. Oh crap! I wonder how mad he is that I suggested a play date. I know they’re not my kids and I shouldn’t be making any decisions, but seriously, I didn’t think it was a huge deal.

  “Why did you open the door for her?” He steps forward, closing the gap between our bodies.

  “What do you mean?” It occurs to me that I never called his name and yet he came running upstairs. “How did you know she was here?”

  “Jeremiah called.”

  I thought J was only ordered to follow me around when I’m out and about or at work. I never imagined that he’d be watching the house.

  He tells me that Chris has been missing for a few days so Nora and her team have been keeping tabs on Gina. Either she really doesn’t know where her brother is or she’s a really good liar.

  “Should I be worried about her?”

  His honesty surprises me. “I don’t know.”

  IT’S NEW YEAR’S Eve and Ryan Seacrest is going on and on about the biggest music events of the year. I turn up the volume on the plasma TV as I do my hair and makeup. The short silver dress that Adam bought for me fits like a glove, hugging every curve and making my boobs look even bigger than they are.

  “I’m not sure I want you to wear that dress anymore. I’m going to get into so many fights trying to keep those horny motherfuckers away from you.” He pushes my hair to the side and skims his nose at the nape of my neck, inhaling deeply. “Mine.”

  “Adam, stop. Don’t start something you can’t finish.” I turn to face him.

  “Oh, we’ll finish alright.”

  “We have dinner reservations.”

  “I have something to eat right here.” His hand cups between my legs.

  I force myself to move away from. I know that if I don’t walk away he’ll devour me and I’ll be powerless to stop him.

  “Come back here.” He tugs after me. “Kiss me.” So I do. I grab his unshaven face and kiss him like there’s no tomorrow. Our tongues start their familiar dance, meeting in the middle while my hands roam over his chest covered in a dress shirt, vest and jacket. My legs are spread with his hand as his fingers slide under my thong, parting me. Those dexterous fingers massage my core, bringing me to the point of no return. My pulse starts to quicken and I know what’s about to happen. I anticipate the feeling.

  “Oh, look at the time. We have to go.” He says, looking at his Tag Heuer watch.

  My eyes snap open! What the fuck! With amusement on his gorgeous face, his eyes crinkle as he smiles; he slips his fingers into his mouth and licks them clean, tasting me, savoring me. “Delicious.”

  At this moment I hate him! I want to pull his dick into my mouth and bite it hard!

  ***

  IN THE ESCALADE, I decide to sit in the back with Shelby, letting Mike ride in front with Adam. I refuse to sit in front because he, like usual, will try to keep one hand on the wheel and the other up my dress.

  “I can’t believe you got her to babysit?” Shelby slaps Adam’s arm lightly.

  “Why not?” He snorts. “Nora’s a highly trained FBI agent. I’m pretty sure she can handle a couple of seven year olds for a few hours.”

  ***

  I AM DRUNK and extremely exhausted. After drinking nearly an entire bottle of wine and then champagne that was meant for sharing and dancing all night, I know a hangover is bound to be waiting for me when I wake. Not exactly the best way to start the New Year with my new fiancé and his kids.

  Adam lets me stay in bed most of the day. My mind drifts back to his body swaying against mine, his hips gyrating against my ass while his hand spread across my stomach while we danced. I remember his warm breath in my ear and his lips on my neck. I can’t believe I never knew he could dance like that. I wonder what other secrets he’s keeping from me.

  “Mia, wake up, babe.” Adam’s voice whispers to me. My eyelids are still heavy and I’m not quite ready to face the world.

  “Hmmm . . . get in bed with me . . .” I turn to face him. He looks delicious. He’s freshly showered and he smells so damn good.

  “I have to go meet Nora. I need you to watch the kids.” I sit up immediately and the room starts to spin. “Okay, give me a minute.” I scrub my hands over my face and take some deep breaths.

  “Come on. Hop in the shower.”

  Ten minutes flat, I’m out and getting ready to face the kids. I hope Nora wore them out last night so they’ll want to watch a movie or something. Maybe Peter Pan will come help me. My pounding head makes me swear to God I will never drink that much again.

  “What’s going on?” I know this meeting has something to do with Chris. I wonder if he’s been arrested or something. Mike did say something was going down—it was just a matter of time.

  “I really don’t know. She just said to come as soon as possible.” I hear the warning in his voice. He wants me to stop asking questions so he can go.

  “Okay. Sorry. Please call me as soon as you hear something.” I walk downstairs and watch him get into the Escalade.

  I grab my phone and dial Shelby, wanting to talk to Mike. He might know what’s going on.

  “Hey.”

  “Hey yourself.” I detect humor in her tone.

  “What’s going on? What are you laughing about?” I know her too well.

  “You don’t remember do you?”

  Oh no! I did it again!? I hope I didn’t embarrass Adam too much with whatever I said or did last night.

  “No. What did I do?” I ask reluctantly.

  “Oh, no . . . You might want to ask Adam that question.”

  “C’mon!” I whine into the phone. “Help a sister out!”

  “Nope!”

  Ugh! If she weren’t pregnant and so hormonal, I’d probably hang up on her.

  “Hey did you hear about Chris?”

  Uh, no! That’s why I’m calling you. I need to talk to your husband.

  “No, Adam just raced out of here to meet Nora. What’s going on?”

  “Mike said they have a warrant for his arrest. They have a long list of charges against him. He’s in some serious trouble.”

  “Wow.” I don’t even know what to say. I’ve always known something was not right with that guy. He’s always given me a bad vibe even when we were kids. Then for some insane reason, I think of Gina. I wonder if she knows he’s going to be arrested. If Josh were ever in trouble, I would do whatever I could to help him.

  The kids start calling me so I hang up quickly with Shelby and go in search of them.

  I spend the rest of the day, nursing a nasty hangover and playing board games with the kids until it’s time for dinner. Adam still hasn’t responded to any of my texts. Whatever’s going on must be pretty serious.

  The kids get their baths and are in bed. Shortly before nine, Adam comes home, ashen and tired; he’s visibly upset. I open my arms and he steps in, pulling me so tightly that I ask him to ease his grip.

  “It’s bad, Mia. So bad.” I know that Shelby said there was a long list of charges against Chris. I’m guessing he’s looking at a lot time in federal prison for what he’s done. Didn’t anyone ever teach him there are consequences for the c
hoices we make?

  “What happened?” I pull away so I can see his eyes. I see sadness in them.

  “They almost killed him. Beat the shit out him and left him for dead.”

  Oh, my God! Someone tried to kill Chris! He’s an insensitive asshole and all, but to think that somebody wanted him dead is unbelievable.

  “He’s in intensive care; he’s stable for now, but he’s not out of the woods yet.”

  “This is crazy! Where was he? Gina said she hadn’t seen him in a few days.”

  “He was in our New York office.”

  “They found him half dead in the office? I don’t understand. Weren’t there people around in the building?”

  He looks away, like he’s avoiding me. “He was in the apartment that’s adjacent to the office.”

  “The apartment . . . Oh . . .” Understanding hits me like a ton of bricks. “That apartment. The one where you bring women.” I don’t ask; I don’t have to.

  “Brought. We brought them. Past tense. All in the past.”

  The hangover headache and nausea come back full force, causing me to step back, widening the space between us. I know he has a past and I know I’m his future. The rock on my left finger reminds me of that fact, but I hate all the women who’ve been with him. It makes me insanely and irrationally jealous.

  “Please don’t make this into something that it isn’t.” He reaches for my arm and I concede, slipping into his hold.

  “So what happens to Chris now?” I change the subject immediately.

  “Well, I guess they wait to see if he makes a full recovery and then proceed with the arrest.”

  “I had to call Gina so she could be there with Carl when he got the news.”

  Not knowing how to respond to that, I ask if we can just go to bed.

  Adam holds me close to his naked chest, but doesn’t try to move his hands to my breasts. He and I both know nothing is going to happen tonight. This is such an unusual occurrence for us.

  Just as my eyes close for the night, I hear him whisper, “The DeGennaros will all be out of our lives soon enough.” I swear it’s like he can read my mind.

  TWO WEEKS AFTER the New Year, Adam and I take a much needed, long weekend trip to Culebra, a small remote island off the coast of Puerto Rico. Pete was thrilled when we asked if he could stay at the house with the kids for a few days.

  “I wonder if these people appreciate what they have,” I ask, leaning back on my elbows, and curl my toes into the white sand as I listen to the waves crash against the shore. The sunlight shimmers off the crystal clear water; it’s a gorgeous shade of turquoise which covers the smooth ocean floor.

  “I don’t know. I guess it’s easy to take things for granted.” He hands me a Corona and smiles.

  My eyes fill with lust when he leans back on the blanket, folds his hands behind his head and closes his eyes, absorbing the direct rays of sun after tipping back the last of his beer. I scan the length of him from the top of his wet hair, down to his perfect face, over his chest and hard stomach. I lick my lips and suddenly feel ravenous for what is under his swim trunks. God, he’s gorgeous.

  “Stop staring at me.” His lips pull into a smile.

  “I can’t.” I confess.

  He opens one eye and squints at me. “You can’t?”

  “You’re too damn good looking. Do you know how many women would kill to be here with you?”

  He scoffs. “Me? Have you ever looked in the mirror?” His eyebrows rise up. “You walk into a room and men stop and stare. Didn’t you notice that New Year’s Eve?”

  I lean down and kiss his mouth. “You are insane.”

  “Hey, by the way, what did I say or do that night? I hope I didn’t embarrass you too much.”

  He lets out a sexy chuckle. “Let’s just say you could’ve been arrested for public indecency.”

  “Oh my God! I’m so sorry! It’s all your fault. You and that body drive me crazy.”

  “Is that the only reason you want me? For my body?” He smirks.

  “No. Of course not!”

  He’s suddenly on top of me, looking down. I feel his erection against my belly.

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes! You are kind of smart.”

  “And?” He nips at my neck.

  “And you’re a nice person.”

  “And?” He bites down on my earlobe.

  “And you smell really good.”

  “And?” His lips hover over mine.

  “And you have a big, beautiful co—”

  “See, I knew it! You do only want me for my body!” He rolls off and stands up, pulling me by the hand.

  “If you can catch me, you can have me.” Adam turns and runs toward the water. He and I both know that his long legs will carry him away faster than I can catch him, but I’ll play his game.

  I watch as he dives into the clear water and swims out far. I walk leisurely to the water’s edge, untie my bikini top and step out of the tiny bottom, leaving it on the shore. I don’t worry about the locals seeing me because the house we rented for the weekend has a private beach. I step into the water and turn onto my back, floating slowly to where he is. When I reach him, he snakes his arms around my waist and kisses the nape of my neck.

  “My beautiful, sexy girl. I can’t wait to make you my wife.”

  I turn to face him, wrap my legs around him and smooth back his hair so I can look at his face. “I can’t wait to be your wife.”

  We spend the next two days exploring the tiny Caribbean island, walking hand in hand or biking over the hills to watch the locals fish in the sea for their dinner. School children in yellow and blue uniforms wave hello as we pass by. I realize I miss the kids so much and can’t wait to see them.

  Before we know it, the lazy days of making love all morning or late at night are behind us as we board the plane for home. Our poor bodies will be in shock when we land in the sub freezing temperatures of New England. I promise myself to never take the things I have for granted.

  Adam kisses my rosy cheek, still crisp from the hot sun. “Maybe we can come back for our honeymoon.”

  I smile. “That sounds perfect.”

  ***

  LIFE GOES ON for us throughout the rest of January and February with as much normalcy as possible considering that Chris, who after several surgeries, made a slow but full recovery, was arrested and indicted on at least seven different charges. Nora said they have enough evidence that she didn’t think it would be necessary for Adam to take the stand against his former friend. Life hasn’t all been tainted by those events. Shelby’s belly has finally popped enough to make her look pregnant not just bloated. With Johanna’s parents still in Florida, Pete and Tyler watched the kids so Adam and I, along with Shelby and Mike, could go to the last playoff game in which Tom Brady and my beloved Patriots couldn’t pull off a last minute victory in the AFC Championship game, eliminating the team from another chance at the Super Bowl .

  ***

  EVERYONE AT SCHOOL is sick with the flu or some other upper respiratory illness and while I was hoping to escape unscathed, I am no exception. My body aches, my chest is terribly congested which wreaks havoc on my back when I cough and I can’t breathe. I am a hot mess!

  The visit to the walk-in clinic proves to be the usual diagnosis of bronchitis. Antibiotics, rest, lots of fluids. I wish my doctor weren’t on vacation. She would’ve prescribed something without making me drag my sick ass into the office.

  Adam smooths back my hair, exposing my face before he leans down to kiss my forehead. “How do you feel?”

  I grunt, “The same.” I pull the blanket up and tuck it under my chin. If I have to be sick, I’m happy to be in Adam’s bed. He insisted that I stay at his place so he can take care of me.

  “You look a little better today.”

  “I do? God, I don’t feel like it. Maybe I should call the doctor again.”

  “Give it a few more days. Anyway I love having you here all day, every day.”r />
  I smile. “Ugh! I hate being sick. Where are the kids?”

  “With Peter Pan.” He grins. I love that Adam and Pete have become good friends, always having a battle of wills and testosterone. Needless to say, Adam always wins.

  “Oh, my God! I can’t believe you just called him that.” I laugh and instantly regret it. Everything hurts so damn much.

  “Here.” He hands me an oversized, department store shopping bag. “It’s from Shelby. She said something about moving things along.”

  He fluffs the pillows so I can sit up to look. Inside is a massive pile of magazines and folders labeled with words like reception venues, caterers, flowers, DJs and bridal shower. Even though Adam asked me to marry him on Christmas morning, I haven’t felt the need to rush things. I’m completely happy and want to enjoy my engagement. I’ve never been engaged, not really. When things happened with Dylan back in college, I guess I just assumed that we’d get married. It wasn’t something we really ever seriously talked about.

  I peruse the glossy magazine that has fluorescent yellow and pink tabs pasted all over the place. “Classic look,” “Veil” and “Theme” were just some of the words she highlighted. I know as my matron of honor, she’s excited to see me get married, but everything’s happened so fast. I want time to think about my perfect wedding. I’m not one to be the center of attention; I just want to be the center of Adam’s attention.

  “Have you decided on a date?”

  I look up from the red folder labeled “reception venues,” thinking that all of this is so over the top. I really don’t care where I get married as long as it’s Adam whom I’m marrying.

  “No. That’s something that we need to decide. You’re getting married, too.” I state the obvious, letting the expression on my face agree.

  “Let’s get married tomorrow.” He smiles.

  “I can’t.” I exhale and pout.

  “Why not?”

  “I’m a little sick at the moment.” I smile and offer my cheek for him to kiss.

  At the bottom of the bag, I find handmade, construction paper cards from the students in my class. From what Shelby has said, the substitute has been doing a great job. Poor girl thought she was going to be there for two or three days at the most, not almost ten. I think I need to call the doctor in the morning. I really should be feeling better by now.