My Best Friend's Brother

by Chrissy Fanslau

  When she honked, I was polishing the pendant. I put it around my neck, walked out of my room, and was about to head down when I was diverted by Sullivan’s empty bedroom. “Where’s Sullivan?” I shouted to Dad as I made my way downstairs.

  “At Megan’s!”

  Translated that means Sullivan’s probably walking around in circles at the mall. Part of me wanted to ask Dad if he’d ever actually seen her, but I didn’t want to get in trouble for being a smart-ass.

  I put on my coat and gloves and stepped outside, where the wind engulfed me. I hurried to her red Subaru Legacy sedan, hopped inside and shut the door, quick to warm my hands on the heater. It felt like they’d been flash-frozen.

  She looked less than thrilled. “Look, we have a problem.”

  I froze. “Like…?”

  “Like, Burke wants us to have dinner at home like a family. He said you can join us, since he doesn’t give a crap that I have plans and a life!” She looked out the windshield, shaking her head. “I miss my real dad.”

  A family dinner meant Luke would be there. And their mom, too, who knew that I’d slept with him. And their stepdad, who didn’t—yet.

  I winced. “Maybe I should just stay home,” I started, intending to persuade her to keep me out of it.

  She looked surprised. “Why? Burke’s not gonna be a jerk to you!”

  I gripped the cold door handle. “Really, I could just see you at school tomorrow.”

  She shook her head. “You know what? Let’s just go! Let’s get it over with. The less time I spend stressing over this, the better.” She put the car in reverse and hit the gas.

  We were silent until we reached her house a few minutes later.

  When she got out of her car, I just stared at her front door. She walked halfway there, turned around, and ordered me over with her gloved finger like I’m her little sister.

  It was warm and smelled of roast beef inside. I heard the clattering of silverware being set on the table.

  We removed our shoes and hung up our coats. I followed her into the kitchen, nervous about seeing Luke. But he wasn’t there, to my relief and disappointment.

  “Hi, Adonia,” Mrs. Jacobson said. “Have a seat, honey, it’s almost ready.” Then she screamed something in German. That woman is always screaming something in German. Does Luke even speak German?

  Lilly and I sat together at the side of the table facing the door. Her mom sat between me and Burke. I always liked their dining area—well-lit, hexagon-shaped, with cream marble tiles. It was pretty much empty in there except for the large round mahogany table, a huge glass chandelier and a flower pot on a stand by the door.

  The smell was delicious and I was dying to eat, though when he walked in, I couldn’t tell if it was hunger or nerves.

  Luke wore a white tee shirt and baggy beige pants. He took a seat across from me—next to Burke—and looked me over with those god-like eyes. His hair was styled and sexy. I tried to look away, but it was hard not to stare; he was so hot, so seductive, so tempting.

  And sooo not talking to me.

  Lilly elbowed me.

  I snapped out of it. Her mother had been passing the baby potatoes, and was holding the dish out for me for Luke-knows-how-long. “Sorry,” I breathed. I grabbed the dish and dumped a spoonful of potatoes on my plate.

  I wished everyone would stop staring at me already. From Luke I felt a constant gaze, even as we ate.

  When I finally got the courage to look at him again, he looked away and uttered, “Pass the salt.”

  Burke flashed me a smile. “So, Adonia, tell me, how are your parents doing?” Burke speaks in a heavy accent, so all his Ws sound like Vs. He doesn’t utter a single word without some form of hand gesture. He’s a very tall, well-built man. In fact, it’s strange seeing him next to Lilly’s mother, who is so… opposite!

  Burke looked like he just rolled out of bed, his dark mocha hair everywhere and plenty of stubble. But he always looks like that. He even goes to work like that. It’s his signature look.

  “They’re okay,” I said dully. “My mom left for work again.”

  He strained to remember. “Ah… what does she do again?”

  “She’s an anthropologist,” I said, prepared to explain what an anthropologist is. It’s been a while since we talked about her. It’s like she’s not around often enough to even mention.

  “Anthropology!” His eyes twinkled. “Ah, yes! Very interesting subject! Very research-intensive. She must be very, very… very busy when she’s at work, yes?” He had a habit of repeating a word until he could figure out what word he wanted next.

  “Yeah,” I said, “she is.”

  I wanted to add that she’s so busy she couldn’t even call after I wrecked a car, but I kept that to myself. The last thing I needed was Mrs. Jacobson scolding me about not respecting my hard-working parents. Plus, she could’ve scolded me for other things, too.

  “So how come you’re from Germany,” I asked, “and you have an American last name?” I’d known them forever, and they never explained it.

  Then again, I never asked.

  He laughed, again doing the hand gesture thing. “As you know, I teach at the university. The ah… students… could not say my last name, so I changed it shortly after I arrived in this country.” He smiled. “Problem solved. Ah… but, nobody told you I am from Switzerland?”

  I bit my lip, hoping the Swiss are okay with the Germans. “Sorry,” I uttered.

  Lilly’s mom placed her hand on his back and smiled. “I was sure I told her!” she said cheerfully. He smiled. They gazed at each other.

  Lilly rolled her eyes.

  “So,” I asked, “Do you speak German, too?”

  “I speak German,” Burke said after he swallowed a forkful of beef. “I speak ah… Italian, English, French… ah, and Spanish also.”

  “Oh,” I said, noticing Luke’s stare. He immediately looked at Burke.

  “But, anyway, ah… ah… my cousin, he just got his master’s in Anthropology,” he continued. “He is working on the… the… the…” he looked toward the ceiling and moved a finger clockwise in a circle. “Ah, the Trobriand Islands!” he said, snapping his fingers. “Do you know where that is?”

  “I’ve heard of it,” I said.

  “Never heard of it,” Luke blurted, startling me.

  “That’s because there are no ski resorts there,” Lilly noted.

  I slouched in my seat a bit, wondering if she was always so cold to him, or if I caused that.

  Luke laughed and shook his head. “You never cease to amuse me, Lil!”

  She put her fork down and reached over the table to slap him, but he pulled his head away. “You haven’t seen me in years, Lukasz, you wouldn’t even remember the last time I amused you!”

  He laughed. “Sure I do! You amused me the other day, when you started checking out my friend Gino!” He ignored his mother’s disapproving glare, raised his eyebrows and gaped at Lilly.

  Lilly shook her head. “Are you ever going to mature?”

  He impaled his meat. “I am mature.”

  Her eyebrows pinched. “Really? Could’ve fooled me, clowning around, dating my friends and stuff.”

  “Friend.”

  “What?”

  “Friend.” He made air quotes. “‘Friends’ is plural!”

  “I know English, Lukasz.”

  “Oh. I couldn’t tell. And you can’t pretend you don’t have the hots for my FRIEND, hypocrite.”

  Lilly’s eyes narrowed. “Gino’s not your best friend…”

  “But he is my friend!”

  “Well this is different!”

  His fist hit the table. “No, it’s not!”

  She looked at me. A long, irritated sigh escaped her. At least she smiled right afterwards.

  Did even twins not get along? I always thought they had some magical bond that made them not poke fun at each other and fight like they were me and Sullivan or something.

  “Enough, now!”
their mother demanded, stabbing her salad. “I’m sick of your quarrels!”

  Luke looked at me again, chewing his roast beef. He wiped his hands on a napkin, threw it on his plate, pushed out his chair and hurried out of the room. Burke followed.

  I finished my food quickly.

  Silence.

  Mrs. Jacobson was just finishing her meal when Burke came back in, sat down and finished his. He seemed upset.

  “Is everything all right?” she asked, rubbing his back.

  “Yes, it is fine.”

  Lilly and I dumped our plates in the dishwasher. Before I could compliment her mom’s cooking, she grabbed my arm and dragged me up to her bedroom.

  Her room is plastered in pink—even her canopy and laptop are pink. The wall-size poster of Johnny Depp sticks out like a sore thumb, because it’s the only thing that isn’t pink. I think she’s the real-life Barbie. Heck, she looks like her, too.

  She needs a convertible.

  On the carpet, she patted the floor beside her. I sat. She reached for her stereo remote and turned on Celine Dion. Then she started skipping songs like every song reminded her of some guy she didn’t want to remember. She stopped on Incredible.

  I had a hard time understanding what the problem was with her and Luke, or her and Burke, for that matter. Burke always seemed very nice to me. He’s not around a whole lot the evenings I’m over, but when he is, he’s a real pleasure to be around. Her mom speaks so highly of him, too.

  “I’m depressed,” she mumbled, reaching into the bottom drawer of her dresser. She threw a stack of photos by my feet. “Florida.”

  They were pictures of her and her bikini-clad cousins on the beach. “Is this the guy you met?” I asked, pointing to a dark-haired, gray-eyed guy with his arm wrapped around her.

  “That’s Jason,” she said with a nod. “He said he liked me. Then I told him I don’t agree with sleeping with someone I’d known a mere day, and he vanished.” She shook her head, her eyes narrowed. “I hope a shark ate him.”

  A guy dumping her? My guess is he drowned. “Sucks.”

  “Tell me about it! You know, guys put way too much pressure on me.” She looked at me. “I’m sure you know what that’s like.”

  Her mom called her down. After a grumpy, “I’ll be right back,” she hurried out.

  I sat alone for a while. I jumped in place when the door opened and I saw him there.

  “Am I interrupting something?”

  “No, you just startled me.” I made room for him on the carpet, but to my embarrassment, he just stood there, leaning into the door frame. After a silent second, I asked, “What’s up with you sitting at Tom and Jake’s table?”

  He chuckled. “I won’t be sitting with them again. There aren’t enough tables in that cafeteria. It beats sitting with the pink witch, though.” His eyes moved around the room and settled on me. They were icy blue and steaming hot all at once.

  I licked my lips. “Why won’t you sit with them again?” I asked to keep him talking—I wasn’t complaining.

  “First off, they were bugging me to smoke pot after school. I don’t think an Olympian can do that and still be an Olympian. Second, they only talked to me because we broke up.” He cleared his throat. “So yeah, hanging out with people just to have a lunch table is bullshit. I’m doing McDonald’s or Denny’s from now on.”

  I wasn’t aware that we broke up, I thought it was just a fight.

  Or maybe I hoped.

  My gaze fell to my feet. The words “I love you” clogged my throat. And I was afraid my eyes would give it away.

  “I’m moving back to California with my dad,” he said. “I’m gonna finish high school there. Nothing to stay here for anyway.”

  California?

  I wiped my eyes with my sleeve. A sob caught in my throat. I was devastated. This guy made me fall for him, made me love him, took my virginity and was leaving forever. Not that he worked very hard to get any of that.

  And yet, the only regret I had was driving away.

  “What do you think about that?” he asked.

  I wanted to beg him to stay. I wanted to tell him I loved him so much that it hurt. I wanted to tell him he was breaking my heart. But all that came out was an angry, “Do what you want!”

  I’m so freaking stubborn!

  “Okay. Well, later.” He made it sound so easy, tears began to roll.

  He turned just as Lilly walked back in. She shut the door behind her, sat back in her spot and gave me a gift box. “My mom found your present. And the Minnie Mouse and earrings are still downstairs.” She was taken aback. “Are you crying?”

  I opened the box. It was a cute palm tree pendant, silver with emeralds. I shook my head no, but I’m a pitiful liar.

  She wrapped an arm around my shoulder. “Hey, what’s wrong? Did Luke upset you?”

  “He’s moving!” I burst into tears, completely breaking down.

  She frowned.

  “I don’t want him to move,” I sobbed. “Lilly, you were gone a few weeks and I fell so hard for him. So fast, it’s crazy. I know it looks bad, but I never felt this way about anyone. I love him!”

  She cradled me. “Did you tell him?”

  “I can’t! He doesn’t feel the same. He’s leaving.”

  She pulled the hairs out of my eyes and cupped her hands around my face. “Tell him. I know he loves you. He told me. And not in a nice way.”

  I tried to stop crying. “You and I will be better friends anyway.”

  She let go of my face and slapped her thighs. “Look, I told you I was sorry. You’re miserable now. And he’s miserable too. And both of you are making me miserable! So just tell him,” she pleaded. She got to her feet and pulled on my hands. “Come on. If you don’t, you’ll both regret it.”

  I grabbed a Kleenex from her dresser and wiped my eyes. My makeup looked like crap.

  She pushed me out the door. “Go, go,” she urged. I walked down the hall and knocked. Lilly retreated to her room.

  He opened it on my third knock and moved aside for me. I walked in and he shut the door. His room’s pretty dull—a window, a queen-size bed, an oak dresser and a stereo. Not really what I expected from a guy’s room. Well, except for the dirty socks scattered around the frame of his bed. Kind of gross.

  But you could eat off of his floor compared to Sullivan’s.

  He looked annoyed. I placed myself on his mattress and hugged my knees. “I don’t want you to go.”

  “I have to go.”

  “Why? Why do you have to go?”

  “There’s no reason to stay.”

  Our eyes locked. He looked thoughtful. “Do you love me?” I asked, getting to my feet awkwardly. “Because I still love you.”

  He looked toward the window. “You didn’t act like you loved me last Thursday.”

  Aren’t I entitled to one mistake? “I love you,” I breathed in frustration. “I’m really sorry.”

  “So am I.” He took a step closer, nuzzled my cheek, and kissed me that mind-boggling way. I pulled him closer, kissing back vicariously. His hand crawled up my shirt, resting on my waist. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in. Not only did he manage to make me weak, but he put me in a mood, too.

  And then he said, “This won’t work” and let me go.

  “Seriously?!” I cried. Tears flooded my cheeks. “Why don’t you love me?” I pleaded pathetically.

  He touched the side of my face. “We started off on the wrong foot.” He stepped back and rubbed his eyes. “I’ve got to pack.”

  I took hold of his hand, but he pulled it away. “Can’t you talk to me, at least?”

  “Look, there’s nothing to say. You dumped me because of my sister! You know how much that hurt?”

  “I’m sorry,” I repeated. “I didn’t even dump you, I just drove away! I thought it was just a fight!”

  “I’m sorry, too.” He leaned his back against the wall and slid his thumbs into his pockets. “Maybe it’s time for you to l
eave.”

  “I don’t want to leave. I want to talk.”

  His voice grew progressively loud. “I don’t want to talk! I want you to leave! This was doomed from the start!” He hurried over to a drawer, grabbed an armful of clothes and dumped them in the suitcase on his bed. He stopped two feet short of me. “I’m gonna call my dad, see if he can get a ticket for Friday.”

  “Well, what about us living together after we graduate?”

  He raised his eyebrows. “Do you seriously think Lilly will be okay with that?”

  “Yes! Ask her!”

  “I’m done talking to her. She has a tendency to make drama out of absolutely nothing.”

  “Go ask her! She doesn’t care. She just wants us to be happy! Why don’t you?”

  “Me? You two started this!”

  “So now we’re at fault and you’re not!”

  “I’m at fault for withholding information. The two of you are at fault for overreacting!” He sighed. “Just go home. Sit with Jenna, have her hook you up with some jocks, go to college, and leave me alone!”

  My mouth dropped. Was he implying that I’d turned into Jenna for sitting at her lunch table once? I tried to contain myself, but the words shot out like bullets. “Well then, how about you go hang out with my jerky ex and his stupid stoner friend and brag about how fast you scored!”

  “How fast I scored? You think that’s all I wanted? Bragging rights?” He scowled. “Did I ever beg? Was I ever anything less than a gentleman? If I was please enlighten me, so I can kick my own ass. I don’t care if it took weeks, or if it took years. That’s not what I’m about. And I don’t appreciate being treated like that’s all I’m about!”

  I recoiled. “I’m sorry,” I managed.

  He gathered his thoughts. “You know what? If I knew I’d be in this much trouble with you drama queens over this taboo brother-dating bullshit, I would still have done it. I would still have kept it from you, for as long as possible. Just for another day with you. Not to score, just to be with you. You were worth it, Adonia.”

  “But,” he added, “you deserve better than another asshole looking to score.”

  My heart was in pieces. Never before did my mouth get me into this sort of trouble. “I didn’t mean to hurt—”