A Need So Insatiable

by Cecilia Robert

  “You kissed me. Twice. Well, it wasn’t really a kiss, but you look so . . . so . . . unaffected. Didn’t you feel anything?” I blurt out, gripping the files in my hand.

  Shit! Why do I open my mouth without thinking things through? I swear, it’s like my emotions control what spews out of my mouth. Not my brain.

  He raises his right brow, studying me in that inscrutable way he does everything.

  “Sorry. I didn’t mean to--”

  “Stop.” He commands softly. He pushes away from his desk and prowls toward me, the exposed muscles on his forearms shifting. His eyes lock on mine, pinning me where I stand. I swallow hard, trying to reign in my chaotic thoughts.

  “Believe me, I did,” he says, halting in front of me. He tugs at the files clutched in my hands, and tosses them on the table by the door. He lowers his head a notch, and my lips part slightly, my body gravitating toward him. “You have a beautiful mouth. I’m so damn enthralled by it, I can’t think straight when I look at you. So don’t go thinking, for a second, that I didn’t enjoy kissing you. You’re not ready for my kiss, Sophie.”

  My stomach clenches at the way he says my name.

  Oh, I am ready. I feel as if I’ve been ready, waiting for him to kiss me all my life.

  He inches closer. The heat coming off him slams into me as he slips one arm around my waist, spinning me around so my back is to him. He yanks me back, my shoulder hitting his chest. My breathing speeds up as his erection presses against my butt. He slides his hands down my waist to grip my hips, then flattens one palm on my stomach. My skin tingles as his warm breath fans the sensitive area behind my ear, sending shiver after shiver scattering all over my body. I lay my head back against his chest, and shut my eyes tight, trying to take one breath at a time, but I can’t. His nearness is too overwhelming, his scent, freakin’ intoxicating.

  “When I finally kiss you, really kiss you, baby,” he says in a dark, low voice. “There’ll be no doubt about my feelings for you. I’ll fill every little part of this beautiful, curvy body of yours. I won’t just kiss you, Sophie. I’ll be priming you for what I’ve wanted to do from the second I saw you.”

  He traces his tongue along the shell of my ear, then gently nips my earlobe. His slides one hand up, brushes his knuckles softly across my cheek and along my collarbone. Dropping his arms, he turns and walks away, the heels of his boots clicking on the polished, tile floor.

  Sweet freakin’ Moses! What the hell am I supposed to do with all these . . . feelings he just bombarded me with? My stupid knees feel like someone melted my kneecaps. My body wants to chase after him and tackle him down, roaring like a Viking. But my feet feel like fucking lead!

  I grab the doorknob to keep myself up. I press my forehead on the cool, wooden surface, breathing deeply to stop my lungs from giving out.

  “Let me know if you need any help with the projects, or anything.” He says the last word in a low, soon-you’ll-be-mine voice, and just like that, he annihilates every single cell in my brain.

  I jerk around to face him. He’s leaning back in his chair, his expression once again unreadable.

  Controlled.

  I force my feet forward, pick the files up and take a deep breath, praying it’s enough to carry me through the door, and to my desk.

  Sophie

  THE WEEKEND passes by in a blur of working at the restaurant and sorting out the files in Dad’s study. I finally manage to organize a ledger, working out how much Dad owes and to whom.

  Monday finds me inside the rehearsal room, my attention on Gardelli as he addresses the cast of Love Unfathomable.

  We’ve been rehearsing for the last two hours, and taken three breaks in between. Rafael’s words keep popping into my head. I can still feel his strong fingers on my belly, the feel of his chest against my back, the way his warm breath tickled my skin. How would that wicked mouth of his feel on my body?

  At one point, Simone pulls me aside to ask if I’m feeling well. If only she knew! I have two hours until I see Rafael at Hearts. Enough time to summon some sort of normal expression. If that’s even possible.

  Gardelli taps a pencil on the table to get our attention, and the cast of Love Unfathomable falls silent, as if hypnotized. He looks each of us in the eye with those dark, no-nonsense eyes.

  “I am very impressed with today’s rehearsal,” he says with a trace of Italian accent. “One more time, then we call it a day.”

  The cast rearranges themselves respectively.

  “You ready, Giselle?” Daniel, my lover in the story, whispers.

  “Time to fight for you, my lovely Caleb.” I wink at him. He flashes me a smile, tossing his head back to keep his hair off his face. Such a cutie.

  “Giselle and Caleb.” Daniel and I swing around to face Gardelli. “The two kingdoms are about to go to war. You two made love for the first time last night, and right into the morning. When you wake, Giselle, you find the bed empty. Caleb is gone. You know there’s no way he could have left without telling you. Your gut tells you something is very wrong. Someone shouts ‘The traitor has been captured!’” he shouts dramatically, throwing his hands in the air, “And you jump out of bed to look out the window at the yard below. Caleb is kneeling on the cold ground, covered in snow. His hands are shackled, his head bowed. Blood runs down his front and back after flogging.” Gardelli stops, and walks closer to me. “Giselle. You know he might not survive this time. Your father put a price on his head. I want to feel the emotion. The loss. Good?”

  I nod, the intensity of the words still thrumming in my veins.

  Gardelli strides toward the orchestra pit and signals for them to follow his lead.

  On his cue, the violinists start, followed by the pianist, and I stand there waiting, waiting, waiting. Blood shoots through my veins as different scenarios rush through my head. How it felt when I lost my parents, how I’d feel if something happened to Lilli, or Jace, or Dani. Rafael’s soft kiss on my cheek . . . how would it feel if he was my love? If I lost that love?

  Gardelli signals me and the words of Love’s Misery flow through my lips. Caleb joins me on the second stanza.

  The song ends with an anguished scream from Caleb as he’s thrown into one of the dungeons owned by Giselle’s father. Goosebumps scuttle all over my body at the haunting, chilling sound.

  Holy cow! I have to hand it to him. The boy can scream.

  Silence falls around the auditorium. Simone rubs her arms, a proud smile on her face.

  “Bravo!” Gardelli’s shout resounds across the room as he claps. He thumps Daniel’s back. “Bravo, Bravo. Now, if you sing like that, everyone will bow to you two. We see each other in November, yes?”

  He spins around, not waiting for an answer, and walks toward Simone. I scoop up my sheet music and stuff it into my bag while the cast shakes hands. Some leave the auditorium.

  “Good job, Sophie,” Daniel says as he hitches his bag around his shoulders.

  “You too. Really amazing! You bring out the best in me.”

  He grins, his gorgeous, blue eyes crinkling at the corners. He waves and turns to leave. When I look up, Simone beckons me with her hand.

  “How was it?” I ask her.

  “Magnificent!” she says. “You and Daniel were perfect.”

  “Sophie,” Gardelli says. Simone pats my shoulder as I turn to face the maestro. “Your mother would be so proud of you. You know she was one of my favorite singers?”

  I shake my head, my chest swelling at the compliment. Of course, I didn’t know that. The guy is a freaking international maestro. I’m still floored I’m getting a chance to work with him.

  After chatting for a few more minutes, he excuses himself and leaves for the airport to catch his plane to Venice.

  “So,” Simone turns to face me. “Rafael told me you’re working at Hearts.”

  I nod. What else did he tell her?

  “Are you all right working there?” she says, her gaze holding mine.

  “Sure. Hel
ps to pay the bills. Plus, it’s a posh place to work in. Hawk is really great.”

  Her gaze sharpens. “What about Rafael?”

  “He’s great too. Why? Did he say something about me, about my work?”

  “No! Goodness, no. He can’t stop talking about you, but it has nothing to do with work. Do you like him?”

  My face heats up as my mind tosses back the images from his office. “I think so.”

  She leans closer, lines forming at the corners of her mouth.

  Jeez. Why does she look worried? It’s not like I said I’m marrying him tomorrow.

  “Are you sure? I love both of you very much. I don’t want anyone getting hurt . . . in any way.”

  I swallow, hard. “I like him. But I don’t know where it’s going. I don’t even know why I feel connected to him. Like I know him.” I shrug. What else should I say? I’m already flattered he’s been talking to Simone about me! This is huge.

  She stares at me, her expression displaying nothing but curiosity. “All right. How’s everything else at home?”

  I sigh. “I’m sending Lilli to stay with Grandma.” Her eyes widen a fraction. “I feel like she’s slipping through my fingers while I watch. Does that make me a coward?”

  She shakes her head and touches my cheek. “No. You have Olivia’s stubbornness about facing things head on.” She squeezes my shoulder. “Run along now, before Rafael calls me and growls.”

  I laugh, and peck her cheek. “Thank you for everything, Simone.” I turn to leave, but stop when she calls my name.

  “You know you can talk to me about anything, right? Not just about Rafael.”

  I nod, smile and wave.

  After settling on my Honda, my gaze darts to the right handlebar mirror. The silver Sedan pulls out from its parking space a few feet away, rolling silently toward me.

  One side of my mouth curls up. Losing these suckers is going to be fun. I watch as a tram whizzes past their car, blocking their view. As soon as a car wedges itself between us, I’m off, weaving into traffic.

  Rafael

  AFTER SOPHIE’S first day at Hearts, I’ve tried as much as I can to stay away. Seems I can’t stop behaving like a damn horny caveman whenever I’m around her. Maria’s been helping with whatever she needs, so I make a point of going to the office after her shift has ended. I swore to myself that I’d keep things light until I found out why she can’t remember me.

  But, by Wednesday morning, I can’t take it anymore. I hop into my car and race toward Hearts.

  Fifteen minutes later, I park in my designated space, get out of the car, and stride inside.

  You’re losing your cool, Rafael. Cool? What cool? I’d lost it the minute Sophie walked into my life. Again.

  Sophie sits behind the counter, her head bowed. She runs her fingers through her ponytail, yanking off the hairband, and curses, tossing it on the desk. She scribbles something furiously while biting her bottom lip.

  There’s no way in hell I’ll be able to stay away much longer, horny caveman or not. And I’m leaving for Milan on Saturday morning. I can’t stand one more day without seeing her. Maybe I’m setting both of us up for pain, but I can’t walk away. I need her to know me. Not the young, reckless version of me who’d done things even the devil would shy away from. Just me. The recluse boy she met in that music room years ago.

  The first time I saw her, I was eleven. She’d smiled, and I’d scowled back. The second time, she’d smiled again. I’d scowled and told her to leave me alone. The next time she’d smiled, I couldn’t help it. I’d smiled back, because somehow, between walking into my life and that moment, she’d thawed me.

  I reach her desk just as she flings a pen across it. Curses suited for pirates and sailors burst from her sweet lips. I bite back a laugh.

  “If I’d known your choice of words was so . . . diverse, I would have dragged you to my appointment this morning. The poor idiot wouldn’t have known what hit him.”

  She jerks her head up. Her hazel eyes look washed of any color, and lines crease her usually smooth forehead. Her perfect mouth forms an “O” as soon as she sees me, and she abruptly slams a huge file shut before I can catch a glimpse of what it is.

  “Hello, Sophie.”

  “Rafael.” She grabs a bunch of A5 papers clipped together, shoving them at me. I stare at her lips, fascinated by how they move. “These are for you. Bernard called. He couldn’t reach you on your phone. He’ll pick you up at exactly six-thirty, Saturday morning, for the airport.”

  “Thank you,” I say, making a mental note to call him back.

  I feel her shiver slightly as I intentionally brush my thumb across her knuckles before she pulls away.

  Pretending to check the messages, I notice how quickly she shoves what looks like horribly drawn balancing sheets into the file.

  “Is everything all right, Sophie?”

  “Sure.”

  I eye her jerky movements for a few before another thought enters my mind. Does she have a boyfriend? Did she break-up with him? The thought of another man claiming her attention, loving and touching her, or even soothing her when she’s sad, makes me want to punch something. So I focus on the file she’s subtly trying to bury under mountains of paper, instead. Hawk mentioned her father had left them with debt. Is that what she’s working on? Bile rises in my stomach at the thought of Sophie fighting to survive.

  Shit.

  I clear my throat to ease the tightness. “Balancing ledgers is fun, isn’t it?”

  Yes, Rafael, very cool. As if that won’t confirm I peeked in the file she’s trying so hard to hide.

  A panicked look flits across her face. “Sorry. I--I shouldn’t have brought my personal work to the office.”

  Yep. I’m an idiot. But I can’t let my stupidity drive her away.

  “Sophie. Look at me.” She lifts her face, wide-eyed. “I want you to be honest with me. Always. It won’t affect our work relationship. Now, tell me what you’re working on? What’s wrong? Maybe I can help.”

  She clenches her jaw and shakes her head. “You want to know what’s wrong? I’m not sure what to expect from you. Last week, you seemed interested, then, on my first day, you seemed so cold. Then you said stuff about kissing, but you stayed away from Hearts after that, and when you called, you sounded like a damn robot. Now, here you are, all chatty and warm. I’m getting a fucking whiplash from all these personalities of yours.”

  Her cheeks are flushed, and her eyes are all fire. My dick swells in my pants as I imagine her looking like that with me buried deep inside her. I can’t believe I’m turned on right now. Not very many people have the guts to confront me like that. The cat has finally come out to play.

  Too bad, she’s playing in the tiger league.

  I curl my hands into fists to stop from touching her skin and place them on the counter. She had felt so damn good when I’d held her flush to my body, her tight, curvy ass pressed against my dick. “Aren’t you scared of me?”

  She huffs. “You are human, aren’t you?”

  I blink. “Last time I checked.”

  “Well,” she says, “when you turn into some sort of ghastly creature of the night, warn me, and I’ll review my outlook.”

  I laugh. A serious, honest-to-God laugh. Christ, I can’t remember the last time I did that. The fact that she isn’t scared of giving me crap is refreshing.

  She scoops up her file the same time her phone vibrates on the desk. She swipes across the screen, frowns, then quickly types something and tosses it back onto the desk.

  “Everything okay, Sophie?” I ask again. Second time’s the charm, right?

  “It’s nothing.”

  Liar. “I’m a genius with numbers, you know.”

  She sighs deeply. “I wish I was,” she mutters under her breath. Her eyes widen like she’s shocked she spoke the words out loud.

  I could use her feelings toward me to sway her, but I won’t. I want her to come to me willingly, even if it pisses me off to wait.r />
  “I know we just met the other day, but if you want to talk, I’m here,” I say before striding toward my office.

  “Wait.”

  I turn around, my heart racing in my chest.

  She takes a deep breath. “I’ve been working on some ledgers the last few days, and I have no idea what I’m doing. If I get stuck, can I ask for your help?”

  “Of course.” I’m already sporting a hard-on at the mere mention of numbers. Math is one of those things that takes my breath away. And the thought of Sophie and math together . . .

  “Do you always drive yourself around town?” she asks, staring at me from beneath her lashes. Is she flirting with me?

  I narrow my eyes. “Sometimes. I prefer my freedom, not someone tagging along like a lost puppy. But don’t change the subject. Let’s talk numbers.”

  She quirks an eyebrow. The little spitfire just stole my signature look! I’m losing my touch--Christ, that thought is as shudder-worthy as having a crab crawl up my ass.

  I shouldn’t do this--touch her--but I’m as powerless around her now, as I was when I was eleven. I lean forward, tug her chin up, and brush my thumb along it. So close to that full lip. So very close. “You have a beautiful mouth, Butterfly.”

  Her face pales, her eyes growing wider.

  Shit!

  “What did you call me?” Her voice is a whisper.

  Sophie

  I JERK my head from his grasp. “Why did you call me that?”

  My heart races in my chest as sweat beads on my forehead. What the hell?

  Rafael watches me, his expression shuttered, and shrugs. The movement travels the length of his broad shoulders. So casual.

  “Your tattoo.” He frowns at me. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.” I turn away from him and brace my hands on the printer. “Yes, I am.”

  How can one little word break me like that, whip me with painful memories? The only person who’d ever called me that is long gone. He’d left, even though he had promised he would come back for me.