Lone Female

by Fenton, Clarissa

  I made the final adjustments to the uniform and marched up to the car, ready to give her a piece of my mind. Then as I tapped on the window and she wound it down, I caught a glimpse of her and suddenly felt like a rabbit caught in the headlights.

  It was Mandy.

  I’d completely forgotten that I’d run her home along this road and that she lived just nearby.

  She'd changed her hair, cutting it back to a short, blonde crop which in spite of everything I noticed made her look even sexier than she did before, if that was possible. I had my cap down low over my eyes as usual, but I realised there was no way I was going to be able to get out of this without her recognising me. If I'd made a run for it, she might have recognised my car, and that would have been that. I realised there was nothing I could do except try to bluff my way out of it.

  It took her a while to even look at me properly she was so nervous. Her hands were shaking and she started gabbling before I'd even had a chance to speak.

  'I'm really, really sorry,' she gasped. 'I'm in a major hurry, I didn't mean to go so fast. My mum's really ill in...' She paused and recognised me.

  'Carl?' A look of panic crossed her face and her hands started to shake even more, and she gripped them on the wheel to steady herself.

  'Hello Mandy.' I tried to sound as calm as possible.

  She looked me up and down and shook her head. 'What's this all about...are you in the police...?'

  She must have realised how stupid the question sounded, and her voice trailed off. I grabbed at a chance to talk my way out of it.

  'Yeah, I'm a Special.'

  'A what?'

  Christ, she doesn't even know what a Special Constable is, I thought. Maybe this was going to be harder than I thought.

  'A Special Constable. Part time volunteer, I do evenings and weekends.'

  She paused. 'Oh right...I didn't realise...I mean, you never mentioned it at work.'

  'Yeah, well, it's not the sort of thing you really talk about, is it. People start treating you different.'

  I saw her relax very slightly. I wanted to get away from there very, very quickly. Just as a precaution, I added 'I'm packing it in soon anyway. Too many late nights.'

  I didn't think we had any common acquaintances but just to make sure I said 'Best keep quiet about it, eh?'

  She looked doubtful but then tried to smile. 'I suppose so...it's just a bit...well I don't know, it's just a bit of a surprise.'

  I realised I was going to get away with it so I decided to keep the bluff going a bit longer.

  'You cut me up good and proper back there. What's all the rush?'

  She bit her lip. 'Look, Carl, am I trouble? I mean, have I actually done something wrong? It's just I'm in a real hurry.'

  I really wanted to let her go but realised I needed to press the advantage home to avoid her suspecting anything.

  'I'll just have to have a quick look at your driving licence and then that'll be it.'

  It was a stupid thing to say; I should have just told her to be more careful and told her to drive on. Instead her lip trembled and tears started to form in the corners of her eyes. She sniffed back the tears as she looked at me and at that moment I cursed myself for being such a fucked up idiot, wishing I'd never started this bloody stupid caper.

  'I haven't got one. Only a provisional. I'm not supposed to be driving this car either, it's my mum's and I haven't got insurance,' she blurted out.

  I looked around to make sure the coast was clear, and tried to sound a bit more friendly.

  'Look, let's just forget it, eh. Just drive a bit more carefully.'

  She wiped her eyes with the back of her fists like a little kid and tried to smile bravely at me. 'Really? You sure it's ok?'

  'Really. Just don't tell anybody about it.'

  'Cheers Carl - you're the best, you know that?'

  'Forget it. Just go home, eh?'

  She seemed to want to confess something. 'It was true what I said about my mum. She's ill - really ill. I'm going to the hospital now, that's why I was driving so fast and in her car. I didn't have time to get a taxi. The doctors told me I should come as soon as I could. I can't go home.'

  Christ, if she was acting, then she was the best actress I'd ever seen. I started to think she'd been telling the truth about her mum when she'd blown me out. I realised I'd been a total, utter prick around her and wished there was some way I could get out of this whole stupid mess. There was a pause and for a mad moment I wondered about giving her a police escort, driving in front of her all the way to the county general on blues and twos, then realised I might as well put a banner up on the car saying 'arrest me now' for the benefit of any passing law. I got the feeling she might actually have been about to ask me to do just that, so I just stepped back from the car.

  'Go on then, you'd better get moving. Be careful though.'

  For a moment I wanted to lean in and kiss her, like any decent bloke would have done, but to keep up this stupid charade I had to pretend to be professional, so I just waved her on as she sped off.

  'Keep in touch, yeah?' She sniffed back the tears, and then sped off. I'm pretty certain I saw her mouth the words 'love you' but I probably just imagined it.

  6.

  It turned out Mandy was telling the truth. A few days later I saw on her Facebook page that her mum had died of cancer. It made me feel a bit sick of myself, to tell you the truth.

  Like the smoker who tells himself he's going to have one more fag and that'll be his last one, I told myself I was going to do one more job and that was going to be it. I was clever enough to realise I was straying into completely fucked up territory, risking a major prison term and maybe even going on the sex offenders' register if I got caught. I decided I was going to go out with one perfect pick up, then call it a day, like some Shakespearian actor who can't retire until he gets a standing ovation. After that I would try to get things going with Mandy and get back to some sort of normal life.

  I chose my other run, not the one where I'd pulled over the mouthy lawyer, and settled down with a pint of orange juice and a paper in the corner. It wasn't long before I saw a mark that took my breath away, and I realised this was going to be a perfect grand finale. She was about 30, tall, about 5' 9", with killer heels and a black dress that fitted her like a glove, showing off an arse like a racehorse and pert, pointed tits. She had sort of bobbed blonde hair, long at the front but shaven up the back, which gave her a bit of a manly look and if she'd been wearing less feminine clothes I might even have taken her for a lipstick lesbian, with her thin, almost cruel looking lips and blue grey eyes that seemed to give off a kind of fire - not the kind that warms but the kind that burns. She was sitting on her own at the bar, drinking from a big glass of wine, and this time I checked the label when the barman topped her up, to make sure it was real booze.

  I'm pretty sure she checked me out once or twice, and for a moment I wondered if it was wise to continue. If she'd noticed me then that might blow the whole game. But then I thought I was probably just imagining it, as she spent most of her time on her phone, fiddling with it and texting. She didn't have anyone else with her and with a getup like that I wondered if she was on a date and had been stood up. If she had been, I reckoned she might be in just the right mood for when I met her later.

  Sure enough come 10.30 she sighed and got up, took a last look round the bar for whoever she was waiting for, and then walked out. I followed, keeping out of sight and getting the false plates on. She drove cautiously onto the main road and I noticed that she was weaving a bit from side to side - not too much, just enough to give a clue that she wasn't quite under the limit. Once the coast was clear I flashed on the blue light and siren. She took a while to pull over and I started to wonder if she might be thinking about trying to make a run for it. Eventually I realised she was waiting for the parking place up ahead and I smiled to myself as she pulled in nicely out of sight from the road. This was going to be a night to remember, I could feel it.
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br />   I strolled over, doing my usual routine, and she wound the window down. I got a look at her close up and she was breathtaking - high cheekbones and eyes that looked inviting but dangerous at the same time.

  She spoke in a dark brown voice with a hint of a London accent.

  'Have I done something wrong, officer?'

  She had a slight smile on her face and I knew I'd got a live one.

  'I pulled you over because you were weaving around the road back there. I'm stopping you on suspicion of drink driving.'

  The smile didn't fade for a minute. I guessed she was a bit pissed, and I guessed she tried this before.

  'That sounds awfully serious.'

  I smiled back. 'Nothing that can't be sorted out.'

  'Oh, I'm so glad. How exactly can we sort it out?' She put an emphasis on the last three words which made me realise she knew what I was up to.

  'You tell me.'

  'Why don't you come in the car?' She laughed and then said 'I mean, why don't you come and sit in the car, and we can talk it over.' She leant over and pushed the passenger door open, and I got a sight of the black dress clinging sheath-like to her athletic body.

  The door clicked to and I eased myself into the heavily padded seat and savoured the seclusion of the little space. She turned to look at me and her dress hitched up a little, giving a breathtaking glimpse of lacy black stocking tops. 'Now then,' she said, firmly. 'You tell me what you're after and I'll tell you if I'll give it to you.'

  She seemed to be looking out for somebody or something, but at the time I just thought she was worried someone might spot us.

  I was so turned on by her that I wasn't thinking straight and I'd forgotten all about getting her to say exactly what she wanted to cover my own back. Instead I looked her in the eye and said 'Why don't you take that dress off and let me fuck you hard on the back seat?'

  That did it. Without even seeing where she got them from, there was a flash of bright metal and a stab of pain through my wrists as she cuffed me to the door handle. Her voice lost its warmth as she barked out the caution.

  'I'm arresting you on suspicion of impersonating a police officer. You do not have to say anything, but it may harm your defence if you fail to say something now which you later rely on in court.'

  Before I could even think of a reply, there was a blaze of white and blue light as a patrol car pulled up in front of us out of nowhere. For a moment she looked anxious then her composure was back.

  'Here come the cavalry.' She patted me on the arm as I stared straight ahead in shock.

  'You just sit tight lover boy. Don't get too excited and make a mess on the seats, will you?'

  She smiled cruelly and got out of the car, strolling over to talk to the two policeman who had got out of the car, occasionally looking over to me and pointing.

  When I thought about it, I suppose I knew it had to happen eventually; however clever I was I couldn't have got away with what I was doing indefinitely. I'd just thought I'd be picked up by the uniform boys, like the two I'd ran off from, not some sort of honey trap by a woman who looked like she'd walked off the set of a high class porn film. I saw the future flash before my eyes; court case, sacked from work, probably ending up in prison. Christ. I needed a fag urgently and reached into my pocket, feeling a stabbing pain in my wrists as I remembered I was cuffed to the door. I heard the click of heels as she swayed over to the car and got in, smiling brightly and started the engine.

  'Right then,' she said. 'Name and address.'

  I wondered about staying silent but then realised it probably wouldn't do me any favours. I even wondered about trying to escape, but there was no chance of that. The sooner I started co-operating the quicker I might get out of it.

  She must have read my mind because she added 'Don't bother giving a false one because we're going to check it out.'

  'Carl Sanders. 3 Aberdare Gardens, Oldminster.'

  'OK Carl. My colleagues are going to follow on and we're driving to your place.'

  This sounded a bit odd to me. 'Aren't we going to the station?'

  'Not just yet Carl. We want to make sure you're telling us the truth about where you live, don't we, like I just told you? And besides, who knows what we might find there?'

  I breathed as sigh of relief as I realised there was nothing incriminating in the house. All they'd got on me for sure was the uniform I was wearing and the false plates on the car. That made me think of something.

  'What about my car?'

  She kept her eyes on the road as she increased her speed along the dual carriageway. 'That can stay there until I'm finished with you.'

  Something didn't sound right about this. I looked behind and the squad car was still following. As we neared the turn off for my road, I looked again and the car was gone. She pulled up at my house and stopped the car in the drive.

  She leant towards me and produced a key. 'I'm going to uncuff you. Are you going to promise to be a good boy? I don't want to give your neighbours anything to talk about.'

  I didn't give a toss about what the neighbours thought but I was wondering what my chances were of making a run for it. But where would I go? Anyway, I didn't have a chance, because when she came round and opened my door, she immediately got my arm in a vice-like grip, but a discrete one, like she was just helping someone a bit pissed out of the car. She was surprisingly strong and before I knew it, she'd frogmarched me to the door.

  'Open the door then.'

  I fumbled for my key with my free hand and looked behind me into the road.

  'Where have the rest of your lot gone?'

  'Let's just get in the house. I'll explain everything in a minute.'

  I managed to get the lights on and she paused, taking a quick look around, then suddenly and violently twisted my arm behind the back and slammed me into the sofa face first. Fortunately the cushions broke most of the impact but I got a mouthful of DHL's finest tweed as I cried out in pain.

  'What the fuck...?'

  I couldn't see anything but could hear her.

  'Right then, you bastard. Not such a big man now, are you?'

  I tried to kick back but I felt the cold metal of the cuffs again as she snapped them on my hands behind my back, then pulled me round to face her and slapped my face, hard. Now, I'm not a violent sort of person, and I wouldn't hit a woman unless it was absolutely necessary, but that made me angry and I was about to slap back when she laughed and stood back from me, hands on her hips and breathing heavily.

  'You really fell for it, didn't you?'

  'What...?'

  'You really thought I was the law. Jesus, Carl, you're a gullible cunt. And I'm guessing your name really is Carl because from what I've seen you're too stupid to think up a false one.'

  'Who...who are you?' My mind was in a complete whirl. I couldn't think straight. What was she on about?

  She started strolling round the room, picking up bits and pieces like she owned the place and turning to look me up and down. She laughed again, but there was no warmth in it.

  'I'm just like you Carl. I get off on pretending to be in the police as well. Only it looks like I do it a bit more convincingly than you do. You should have cuffed me when you got the chance. Or don't you even have any handcuffs on that kid's dressing up uniform you've got on?'

  I was really confused now. 'What are you on about? I just saw you talking to the boys in blue and they followed us here.'

  She smiled and came closer to me. I could smell her perfume, and a deeper, feminine smell that started to make my pulse race.

  'You think you're the clever one don't you? Soon as you came up behind me I thought, "hello", unmarked car trying to pull me over with a blue light, he could be anyone, and me all alone out here in the dark. So I made a call - hands free of course, don't want to break the law, do we? I dialled 999 and told them I was a lone female being followed by a car that was trying to pull me over.'

  'Why didn't you tell them about what I was doing then?'

>   She came closer and ran a finger down the front of my stab vest. She had long, strong looking hands with dark painted nails. She looked me up and down and her finger paused at the top of my belt.