by Roger Ma
When assessing a weapon’s adequacy in combat against the living dead, there is one specific factor by which all armaments need to be judged: the effectiveness of neutralizing a ghoul in as few blows as possible. What this means is that any weapon, modern or historical, Asian or Western, needs to be judged under a set of parameters specific to undead combat. Many traditional armaments that have serviced warriors for centuries may not perform as acceptably when your opponent is an ambling corpse. Simply because a weapon has fared well against the living is no reason to assume that it will function just as well against the dead.
SOURCING YOUR ARMAMENTS
Regardless of the type of weapon you choose, it is critical that you rely on a reputable supplier when assembling your arsenal. When selecting a weapon, your first thought may be to venture to your local flea market martial arts supply stand and pick up one of many swords, axes, or spears on fanciful display. In reality, you would be better off heading to your neighborhood toy shop, as many of the weapons you’ll find in such establishments are little more than that. A majority of mass-produced weapons are cheaply made and poorly crafted. There is also the other mistake of choosing a weapon reproduction intended to mimic those from an alternate time period, television program, or galaxy. It is strongly recommended that you avoid these facsimile weapons at all costs, regardless of any personal connection or affinity you may have toward them.
True battle-ready weapons are available from custom craftsmen and weaponsmiths but are notably more expensive than those found at mass merchants. There are also reputable large manufacturers who produce quality armaments (see Combat Report: Kenjiro Itto). Use price as an initial indicator of superiority as well as the reputation of the producer. In undead combat, the phrase “You get what you pay for” takes on a much more critical meaning, and could result in having your weapon shatter into fragments against a zombie skull, as described to the author in this firsthand account of the Tragedy at Hever:If I could take back that message, I would. I didn’t mean any harm. It was only supposed to be our small group, the circle of friends that regularly came together and had some fun in the fields just beyond Hever Castle. But I reckon my note was forwarded, and reforwarded, and reforwarded. When I arrived at the clearing, there was what looked to be more than a hundred people, none of whom I knew from Adam.
I was a medieval role player. All of my kit was based on authentic historical context. There were a few like me there, one guy in a full suit of armor. He looked well hard, even though I thought he’d overdone it a bit. These other types, I haven’t a clue as to what they were thinking. They came dressed in all sorts of genres—high fantasy, cosplayers, goth—all of them happy as Larry, and all of them carrying bizarre weapons. Some of the items, they certainly looked menacing, but how they’d hold up in actual combat they hadn’t the faintest idea. I guess that’s what they were hoping to find out. I wondered to myself if any of them had any experience with the weapons they carried. This one bloke, I remember, was waving around this double-hooked scythelike thing. How anyone could possibly use it in a real battle was a mystery to me. That didn’t stop him from trying when we saw a large horde rising over the low hills to the east. That was our first blunder, waiting in the bottom of a valley for them to come to us. I take that back; the first blunder was ever thinking to do something this daft in the first place.
It was a bloody horror show. In the first attack wave alone, I saw four swords splinter on impact. I watched another blade fly right out of its handle through the air and stick itself into the chest of a man dressed as an elf, who let out a ghastly scream. Many other weapons didn’t hold up much better than that. I’d be lying if I said those wielding the medieval arms fared better than the others. Even I was shocked at how terribly many of the so-called fighting-ready weaponry fared against the dead. Most of those who saw their weapons come apart in their hands were smart enough to scamper off. Others weren’t that wise. By the time they tried to pull out some backup dagger, it was too late. Screams echoed across the open valley as they tore through us. Even those with armor managed poorly. I remember seeing this one unlucky sod wearing a chain-mail top; I thought he’d be alright. A zombie grabbed him by the collar with both hands and ripped it apart like it was a T-shirt. A shower of chain rings scattered to the ground, followed by the man’s innards. Right after seeing that, I figured I’d had enough and took off running. One of the last sights I caught was that bloke in the armor plate, at least what was left of him. His headless body was seated on the grass. Three ghouls were squatting around him, pulling flesh out from around his steel collar like he was an open tin of baked beans.
—Derek, Highbrook Reenactment Society,
Sussex, UK
LONG-RANGE WEAPONS
Long-range armaments vary anywhere from four to eight feet in length and are used to engage undead assailants at distances of at least five feet between opponents. Though long-range weapons afford you the greatest level of safety during zombie combat, they can also be among the most difficult weapons to master. Depending on the weapon, these arms may also be difficult to acquire for the everyday civilian.
Weapons used at this distance fall into one of two categories: obstructive or destructive.
Obstructive Weapons
The category of obstructive weapons is defined by the concept that it would be exceedingly difficult to deliver a ghoul-stopping blow with the weapon given its weight, length, and physical structure. As such, obstructive weapons are meant largely to delay the incoming onslaught of a walking corpse. The most primal of weapons in the obstructive category, and the foundation for many other long-range weapons, is the simple fighting staff.
Staff: This weapon has a long history in both Asian and Western combat arts. Known as the bo in Japan, the guin in China, and the quarterstaff in Europe, it is generally made of hardwood and anywhere from six to eight feet long.
With no sharp edges to cut, nor weighted ends to increase striking damage or penetration, the staff is primarily considered a nonlethal weapon popular with individuals, such as monks or friars, who would typically show mercy toward their attackers. Mercy, however, is a trait that cannot be afforded to the living dead.
The proficiency required to deliver a single incapacitating blow to a zombie with a staff, with its wooden structure and lack of an aggressive point, is very high. Individuals who can do so consistently have typically trained with this weapon for years. Given the staff’s weight and dimensions and the skill necessary to wield it effectively, thrusting attacks to the cranium have limited effect on the undead. It is highly difficult to penetrate a ghoul’s braincase with a thrust from a staff even if directed toward vulnerable areas, such as the ocular socket. The circumference of the weapon is typically larger than that of the average eyeball, not to mention the precision required to deliver such a blow. Centrifugal attacks will also do minimal damage on the undead skull, resulting in wounds that are mostly superficial in nature depending on your strength and ability to generate momentum with the weapon.
Staff Combat Strategies
With a limited ability to quickly deliver a neutralizing blow, how practical is this weapon in undead combat? The most effective application of the staff or any stafflike implement (broom handles, mops, painting rods) is to take advantage of the weapon’s length and keep the ghoul at bay, thereby obstructing its attack. This can be done by grasping one end of the staff with both hands and forcing the other end into the midsection of the zombie. In executing this technique, there is a slight chance of the ghoul grabbing or pushing the weapon out of the way. Most zombies will be too focused on reaching their prey to execute such a maneuver, but should this occur, reset your weapon and force the end of the staff back into the corpse.
Using this strategy, you can keep a zombie at a moderately safe distance indefinitely, provided you have the energy to do so. Do not dismiss the usefulness of this tactic, as it may provide a small window of time for you or your party to escape. This technique can also be used in
coordination with another human to pin the ghoul down while your teammate delivers a finishing blow. If you have a sufficient strength and weight advantage over your attacker, you can also use this technique to maneuver the zombie backward and drive it over a ledge or embankment.
Given its limited destructive power, the staff should be a weapon of last resort, used only if no other choices are available. It does provide some advantage over being completely unarmed, and can be used effectively in a team-based operation.
Destructive Weapons
All other weapons in the long-range category fall under the destructive class, as they have the sufficient mass, weight, and structural properties to deliver incapacitating blows to the undead. Destructive long-range weapons fall roughly into three categories:
Polearms: This class of weapon incorporates the length of a staff with the neutralizing power of a cutting or piercing head. Weapons in this category include the Swiss halberd, the Roman pilum, and the Japanese naginata. Although they are somewhat heavier at the blade/point end, they are generally more evenly balanced than long-range bludgeoning weapons with a large, heavy steel blade, such as the battle-axe.
Battle-axes: A special class of axe developed specifically for combat, the battle-axe differs from a utilitarian axe by its extended length and wider blade structure. Like all common axes, battle-axes are heavier at the blade end, generating considerable momentum when swinging the weapon and landing on target with a great deal of force. People commonly associate the battle-axe with European medieval arms, but examples of this type of weapon can also be seen in the Chinese guan dao and the Greek labrys.
Great swords: Longer and heavier than your average sword, great swords, also known as long swords, typically need to be brandished with both hands. Living up to their name, swords in this category can be up to six feet in length. Examples of this type of weapon include the Scottish claymore, the Japanese nodachi, and the German zweihänder.
Although there are a number of different weapons to choose from as your primary long-range protection, the following are evaluations on some specific armaments. We will also provide analysis for armaments that fall into the other combat ranges later in this text. Before we begin, let us take a moment to explain the various categories for each evaluation:
Effectiveness: How quickly can the weapon neutralize the ghoul? The easier it is to end the engagement with a single blow, the higher the effectiveness rating.
Life span: How many combat situations can the weapon endure before it needs to be repaired or replaced? The figures provided are average life spans for the weapons evaluated.
Skill level: How skilled a combatant must you be to wield the weapon? Armaments that require little to no training would rate low, while weapons with a steep learning curve would rate very high.
Availability: How easy is it to procure the weapon? If it is a matter of a pickup at the hardware store, the weapon is common. Arms that are custom forged or special ordered are very limited.
Cost: How expensive is the weapon to purchase? A tool that costs a few dollars qualifies as very inexpensive, while those that run upwards of several hundred dollars fall on the opposite spectrum.
WEAPON EVALUATION: SPEAR
EFFECTIVENESS: MODERATE
LIFE SPAN: 100+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: VERY HIGH
AVAILABILITY: VERY LIMITED
COST: MODERATE
OVERVIEW: The spear has an illustrious history across many cultures as the quintessential long-distance combat weapon. Its extended reach and pointed tip, often made of iron or steel, have been used to effectively keep both man and beast at bay. Against an enemy that does not fear its sharpened spire, however, this weapon loses all of its deterrent capabilities.
Although the spear’s length provides the bearer a considerable level of safety against the living dead, the skill required to deliver a felling blow with this weapon is one of the highest among long-range arms. Stabs to the limbs and torso of an attacking ghoul are useless in thwarting its attack. Stories exist of those who have seen spears used ineffectively against the living dead, with several ghouls impaled on a single pike, each continuing to writhe and snap at its prey.
Using this weapon against a walking corpse requires a precise, thrusting strike to the skull in order to penetrate the brain. Targeting the eyes of an oncoming zombie, though effective, also necessitates an unwavering hand. Unskilled spear fighters often execute many ineffective thrusts, which can glance harmlessly off the sides of the corpse’s moving head as it closes in. The life span of the spear can also be somewhat finite depending on the number and severity of combat engagements. The shaft of the weapon is almost always made from wood, which makes it vulnerable to rot and splintering during undead combat.
WEAPON EVALUATION: VIKING AXE
EFFECTIVENESS: HIGH
LIFE SPAN: 200+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: HIGH
AVAILABILITY: VERY LIMITED
COST: EXPENSIVE
OVERVIEW: Combining the striking power of a hand axe with the length of a short staff, the Viking axe makes a formidable weapon against the living dead. As with all axes, the damage inflicted by this weapon comes primarily from its broad cutting edge, which is secured to a shaft more than three feet long. This two-handed weapon was made famous at the Battle of Hastings, where the Saxons used a version of this axe to cut down the horses of the Norman cavalry.
The most effective use of this particular weapon against the undead is for the bearer to swing it in a wide, circular arc and crash the blade down upon the skull of an attacking ghoul. As we discussed earlier in the section on anatomy, the primary attack target with any weapon should be the skull. As tempting as it may be, attacking areas on the torso with this weapon is not advised. Not only are those types of strikes ineffective, you run the risk of having the weapon lodge itself in the ghoul’s body cavity, making weapon extraction difficult. A forceful blow with the Viking axe to the neck, however, has the potential to separate the zombie’s head from its torso, which then must be followed up by a finishing blow to the brain.
As with the spear, the Viking axe’s greatest liability is its wooden handle, which may crack or splinter after extensive combat. Under normal circumstances, it would be a simple task to replace a damaged handle. During a large-scale undead outbreak, however, most natural resources, including axe handles, will most likely be in short supply.
WEAPON EVALUATION: ZWEIHÄNDER
EFFECTIVENESS: HIGH
LIFE SPAN: 150+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: HIGH
AVAILABILITY: VERY LIMITED
COST: VERY EXPENSIVE
OVERVIEW: German German for “two-handed,” the zweihänder is a powerful sword that was allegedly used to break through the pikes and spears wielded by soldiers at the front lines of battle. Its most famous (or infamous) use was by Frisian warrior Pier Gerlofs Donia, whose mythic strength and stature enabled him to behead several opponents simultaneously with a single swipe of this weapon.
Swung by a stout and capable fighter, a properly-forged zweihänder, with a blade between four and five feet long, can cut down a pack of living dead. Crafted almost entirely of steel, this two-handed sword has an excellent life span, provided it is well maintained after each zombie engagement. Its heavier weight provides the ability to smash through bone and can swiftly decapitate undead opponents in combat. Certain models of this weapon also have a grasping ring at the crossguard, so that the sword can be more comfortably held by the combatant to punch through the skull of an attacking corpse.
A weapon of this size, however, requires extensive practice to brandish with consistent skill. Battle-ready zweihänders are also difficult to find and can be quite expensive. Do not err on the side of frugality by purchasing an inexpensive version of this weapon. Ensure that you patronize a reputable armaments dealer if your weapon’s intended use is against the living dead.
WEAPON VALUATION: NAGINATA
EF
FECTIVENESS: MODERATE
LIFE SPAN: 100+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: VERY HIGH
AVAILABILITY: VERY LIMITED
COST: EXPENSIVE
OVERVIEW: Many are familiar with a samurai’s two primary weapons: the longer katana and the shorter wakizashi swords. Few are familiar with the Japanese polearm, the naginata. Much like all polearms across cultures, the naginata was used primarily by foot soldiers against cavalry, where its longer reach could attack samurai on horseback. It is composed of a curved blade approximately three feet long mounted atop a shaft up to seven feet long, creating a weapon that is potentially ten feet in total length. Interestingly, the naginata was often wielded by female samurai and was popular among Japanese women in general, who used the weapon’s length to neutralize any advantage an attacker had in weight, height, or strength.
Like all long-range weapons, the naginata can be awkward to wield against the living dead. The traditional curvature of the blade makes it difficult to thrust straight into the skull. The naginata is more effective as a slashing weapon; decapitation of an oncoming ghoul is an appropriate tactic for this particular armament. You can also use special combat techniques with a long-distance weapon of this type; they will be explored later in this text.
