She liked it. God, it did erotic things to her body, which was already sore. She was amazed that after two orgasms she could feel the tingles starting all over again. She tore her gaze away and forced it to Ryder’s face. A vein throbbed in his neck and one stood out in his forehead. His eyes were still closed and his shoulders heaved, as hers did, with the effort to catch his breath.
“I…” the full impact of what she’d just done washed over her. If her breaths weren’t already erratic, they would have been. No. Don’t think about it. She refused to let herself panic. There was plenty of time later, to regret what she’d done. To realize the full impact. She wouldn’t let it happen now.
Ryder’s eyes opened and the dark orbs focused on her. She stared back and for the longest time neither of them moved. The silence of the night swirled around them. The darkness blanketed them.
Laura wished everything could be different. That she wasn’t a Cannelli. That she was free to choose her future, to decide the course of her life.
“You’re already slipping away.” Ryder gently titled her chin up. “Don’t do that. I’m still right here.”
“I- I warned you,” Laura whispered. “I’m- I don’t even know how I could have done this.”
“Regrets already?” Ryder raised a brow. He shed his sweater and she was a little shocked when he used it to wipe her leg clean. He was tender and gentle, far more gentle than she expected and probably deserved.
Her eyes remained glued to him as he bent and picked up her leggings. He passed them over, his forearms rippling with muscle. They were deliciously veiny and striated and ark patterns of ink that wasn’t discernible in the night, swirled over his creamy skin.
“You volunteer at the shelter a few times a week,” Ryder said, as she hurriedly pulled on her leggings. She was so sore, deliciously so, that every movement hurt.
“Yeah.”
“It’s a fortunate thing then, that I just happen to be staying there for the time being. Jimmy offered me a room.”
Laura pressed her lips together in a thin line. It went beyond saying that what they did couldn’t happen again. Not if Ryder wanted to keep breathing. If Nico ever found out what he’d done, he wouldn’t hesitate to torture and slaughter Ryder for daring to even look at Laura let alone everything else he’d done. They’d done.
I wanted this. I wanted him. I still do.
“I…”
“Don’t tell me this was wrong,” Ryder said slowly, his voice actually lighter than expected, with a hint of wry sarcasm. “That goes without saying. For so many reasons.” He gently tilted her chin up, so she had to look at him. His touch burned her. “You deserve better. Maybe once upon a time, I did too. The fact is, we only have the cards we’re dealt and mine were shit. Maybe yours were too. Maybe they still are. Maybe this wasn’t proper or what you deserved. Maybe I should never have followed you and you should have told me to fuck off when you found out that I did, but we’re here.” His eyes stared deep into hers and Laura lost herself in those dark depths.
She shivered. She wished that Ryder could protect her, but she didn’t even know him. He could be anyone. What’s wrong with me? Am I really so desperate that I’d do this with a complete stranger? Laura shook her head. No. She wouldn’t let herself think like that. Ryder might be a stranger, but she felt like she knew him better than anyone in her life.
They were like two souls, shimmering in the night, waiting to smash into each other and make each other whole when they were together.
She’d trusted her senses, her judgment, her heart, to keep her alive all these years. Ryder was… he was right. Nothing had ever felt so right in her life. Even standing next to him she felt safe and at peace. Peace. That was something Laura doubted she ever find in her lifetime.
“What you see is what you get with me. I’m not a good boy. I’ve done very, very bad things in my life. I’m nowhere near what you deserve, but from the second I saw you, I could tell that there was something wrong. Something that makes you sad and afraid. If you let me- I can- if I can’t save you, I would die trying. I would do anything to protect you. I could- take you away from it if you’ll let me.”
Laura shook her head. She had to get out of there before she was tempted to do anything beyond what she’d done already. Giving herself to Ryder was one thing. Letting him help her… she couldn’t do that. He had no idea what he was asking.
“I’m okay.” She ducked her head. “I do have to go. I- please. We can’t do this again. I- I don’t want people getting into trouble for me. Or- or worse.”
“I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself.” Ryder balled his sweater into his fist. His hand strayed from her chin up to her cheek. He caressed it gently, with more care than she thought possible for such large, rough hands.
“You have no idea what my brother is capable of.”
He actually winced. “Unfortunately you have no idea what I’m capable of either.”
“I- please. I need to go. I’m not going to say that we have to forget about this, but if you ever see me again, please, for your own sake and for- for the sake of everyone at the shelter, you can’t talk to me again. You need to pretend like you don’t know me.”
“Not possible.”
“It has to be possible.” She raised her eyes to his again, pleading. Ryder’s lips parted, but he didn’t say anything. His eyes searched hers, but before he could reach any further into her soul, Laura broke away. “Please,” she said again. “Just- please.”
Ryder shook his head. “No way. Not going to happen.” He took a step back and she exhaled slowly when she realized he was going to let her leave. “You’re too beautiful to spend your life in a cage. I’ve killed to- to free something equally as beautiful and fragile before. It was too late. I’m not going to make the same mistake again.”
“Ryder! It’s- you don’t even know me-”
He blinked hard. “I know exactly who you are, Laura. I’ve seen your soul and you’ve seen mine and there isn’t any going back.” He stepped back and disappeared into the shadows before she had a chance to move or argue.
Laura let out a shaky breath. She clutched her hands together, aware that they were shaking. She had seven blocks. Seven blocks to compose herself. To get herself under control, to pretend that this night never happened.
To pretend that after a lifetime of being dead, she hadn’t just rocketed fully and squarely into a life so bright and glorious, it burned her eyes.
Chapter 9
RYDER
It turned out that being a shithead actually was in his genetics.
After getting out of one MC, one that should have bound him until the day he died, he went looking for another. Not to join, but because he needed allies.
Surprisingly, or maybe not so surprising, he was a likable person when it came to the underbelly of society. Guys liked having him around. They liked knowing that a beast like Ryder, someone who wouldn’t hesitate to pull the trigger or give his life for a brother, had their backs. A guy bathed in blood and violence turned out be a good asset.
He knew it would only be a matter of time before he found someone he knew from his past life in some way or other, but it was still a surprise when he did his research and found a true brother in the heart of Servants of Vengeance territory. A few days’ worth of intel, and Ryder knew he had his angle.
Ryder pulled up his hood a little tighter around his face. He wasn’t used to wearing hoodies and still preferred his leather, but they had their use. Blending in seamlessly into shadows in shady places was just one of them.
His target stood fifty feet away. Ryder had been slowly advancing, watching the exchange for the past ten minutes. His brother from a past life just happened to be doing a drug deal in broad fucking daylight.
Shawn Rydell didn’t even notice Ryder. It left him open to walk right up behind the guy as soon as his client was gone, and deliver a good cuff like his father had done to him so many times as a child before an open hand turned into a
closed fist.
Shawn spun around, mouth gaping, ready to deliver a death blow to the bastard who dared lay a hand on him. His mouth parted in shock and surprise, but he recovered quickly and a shit-eating grin bloomed over his ugly mug. Not that the guy was really ugly. He was in his early thirties, had short dark hair, flashing ice blue eyes, and chiseled features that women adored. He was built like a brick shit house, which the ladies also loved. If he had longer hair, he’d been mistaken for a fucking Greek god of centuries past, cast back down to earth.
“Ryder?” Shawn blinked. “Holy shit, that really is you.” Those icy blue eyes gave Ryder a quick sweep. “Jesus. I almost didn’t recognize you without all that leather. You’re wearing civilian clothes.”
“And you aren’t wearing a patch, but ten to one what you’re doing here, without a fucking care as to who’s watching, is Servants of Vengeance business.
Shawn’s eyes narrowed and he glanced around, giving the perimeter a wide sweep, like he should have done in the beginning before he decided to hand over little bags of white powder to the dear old neighborhood scum dealer.
“Look.” Shawn’s voice was low. “This is Servant’s territory. You shouldn’t be here. They don’t like outsiders treading in where they don’t belong. I can do a deal in daylight because the cops around these parts are paid to keep their mouths shut and everyone else is too scared of having their head chopped off their fucking shoulders to even think about ratting or interfering.”
Ryder laughed and Shawn stared at him like he’d actually lost his mind. Hell, there was a good chance that happened. A long fucking time ago, back before he’d ever even blown off his father’s head.
“Good. That’s exactly the kind of shit I’m looking for.”
“Ryder… if you know what’s good for you, you’ll head out of here. You think the Serpents and Scythes were bad? You have no idea. The Servants are a hundred times worse.”
Ryder yawned. “Never said the Serpents and Scythes were bad. I actually kind of liked being in the club. Hell, patching in was the most fun I ever had. The shit paid enough for me to get my mom an apartment. Had guys to watch my back. It wasn’t me who had a quarrel with the upper management. We don’t exactly know who put a knife into Bone’s heart, but damn, obviously the guy wanted out. Wasn’t me. Finding another club is actually tiresome. I would have been fine staying right where I was.”
“Patching in with the Servants makes what we were doing before look like amateur night.”
“Good. Always wanted to blacken what was left of my soul a little further.”
Shawn’s eyes narrowed. “What’s with the new smart mouth? As far as I remember, getting two words out of you was hard.”
Ryder nodded. “I might have a reason to open my big yap now. I’m not looking to patch in. That was just bullshit. Not yet, anyway. I’m taking a break from that. My big bro, he’s the reason I’m here and he wouldn’t like it. He doesn’t know about the past shit I’ve done and I’d like to keep it that way while I’m here. I’m looking for something else. A favor.”
“A favor?” Shawn asked, disbelief coloring his words. “We aren’t the kind of guys who do favors.”
“Maybe they aren’t, but you probably are. I seem to recall saving your ass a few times. And let me give you a tip. The guy you just gave that coke too is going to split. He was twitchy as fuck. I could read it in his eyes even from a hundred feet away where I was watching you.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Shawn tensed.
“Nothing. Just take my word for it. Tell your Prez. John Kill- which between us, is just about the stupidest made up name I’ve ever heard- he’ll enjoy the intel. I’m guessing he’s not going to like when little weasel pieces of shit like that skip town with a hundred gran of his cash.”
Shawn tensed. “Alright. I’ll tell him.”
“And when you do, would you considering asking a question for me? I have it on good authority that the Servants have a quarrel with the same person I’d like to put in the bone yard.”
“Who?” Shawn shifted back and forth nervously. It was clear the conversation had just steered into dangerous territory and he didn’t like it. He approached it the same way any sane, reasonable man would have- with extreme fucking caution.
“Nico Cannelli.”
“No way, man.” Shawn put up his hands and shook his head violently. “Not the Cannelli’s. The Servants don’t like them, but we have an uneasy truce. They stay out of our way and we stay out of theirs.”
“And what if I could give them a reason to go to war? They’d be able to make a move on Cannelli territory and it’s a big fucking chunk. They do a good business.”
“The Cannelli’s are underworld,” Shawn hissed. “Fucking mob shit. None of us want to get involved in that. The thing with them is that when you cut off the head, it springs new ones. New ones that are ten times fucking worse.”
“They aren’t a goddamn Medusa.” Ryder rolled his eyes. “Stop pissing yourself, grow a set of stones, and at least ask for me. For old time’s sake. I promise if you ask that question and I’ll forget any debt you might owe to me.”
“Just because you saved my neck a couple times doesn’t mean I owe you. We were brothers. That’s what brothers do.”
“It is, but we’re not brothers anymore. I didn’t have to stick my neck out for you today and do any kind of research into Servants’ business, but I did. I did, so that your ass isn’t on the line and your head isn’t on the chopping block when that piece of shit skips town. You can thank me for that. Ask the question.” Ryder pulled a piece of paper out of his jeans pocket. He passed it over to Shawn, who took it reluctantly. He eyed it like maybe it was a fucking snake that would strike at any minute. “You can come find me when you have an answer. Don’t cause trouble. The place is a fucking shelter run by good people. You got that?”
Shawn nodded solemnly. “Yeah. I fucking got it.”
“You even think about abusing that address or sharing it, and you’re going to have worse problems than our old Prez. You got that too?”
Shawn nodded. Ryder could tell it killed the guy to owe him one, but hell, what were old friends for? Old friends like him were pieces of shit at best, a nightmare at worst. He wouldn’t have played his cards if he wasn’t desperate.
He watched Shawn walk away. Within a few minutes he’d vanished around the corner of a decrepit old office building that, sporting broken windows and sagging walls, could only be abandoned.
Ryder ghosted as well. It was easy for him to walk through even the seediest parts. People spotted him and knew intrinsically that he was the kind of person who should be left the fuck alone.
Not Laura though. She’d seen him. Really seen him. She looked at him like he was more than just a thing. She’d seen the person that he didn’t even know he was or could be.
Laura.
Ryder had seen her only once at the shelter since he’d been with her in the alley, and fuck, he knew he was running out of time. She’d skirted away from him, ducked her head and refused to even look his way. He didn’t want to press her, afraid he’d chase her away for good.
He knew from past experience that shit could hit the fan real fast and the evil piece of shit that was her brother reminded him of his own father. Unpredictable. Violent. The whole god complex. Nico Cannelli was good for one thing only and that was the fucking grave.
Ryder knew it was crazy, the whole damn thing including his feelings for Laura, but she was there, in what little he had left of a heart. From the first glimpse, she was there, and he protected what was his. In the end, even if she didn’t want him, he could deal with that, but she deserved to be free.
Nico Cannelli had to die.
Ryder was aware of the price of failure, what it would be for Laura. The stakes weren’t just high, they were fucking staggering, so there was no way that he was going to fail.
Chapter 10
LAURA
Survive. Just make it through
. One more second, one more minute, one more hour, day, week, month, year.
Survive. Laura had done it all her life, even before she knew that’s what she was doing. Laura knew that if she kept her head down and just blended in, she’d make it out alive. She’d feared going home, but Nico, fortunately, was away for a week.
It was just her and Drake and they could both actually breathe for a change. The house was almost… light. The air wasn’t stagnant and burdened. They didn’t have to walk around on eggshells, trying to blend in with their surroundings in the hopes that Nico wouldn’t notice them.
It changed nothing though. She couldn’t call what she’d done a lapse in judgment, because she’d chosen her path. She’d acted like the old Laura, the Laura that existed when her parents were still alive. The Laura who stood up for herself and for Drake, who believed in things, who foolishly thought that things like soulmates and love and happy endings were still possible.
She’d stolen back a piece of her life, of her soul.
It might sound ridiculous, even to herself when she thought about it in the darkness of her room, curled into her bed at night, but she knew Ryder was it. All along, she’d been meant to find him. She had no illusions that he could save her, but she knew that she belonged to him. She’d done the impossible, escaped Nico and his hold over her life. She’d given the parts of her that no man could ever touch or steal away, to Ryder.
It wasn’t enough. It was never going to be enough, but it had to be, so Laura kept her head down. She had to protect Ryder and she had to make sure Jim and the shelter were safe. If Nico found out what she’d done and with who, he wouldn’t stop until the entire building was leveled and Jim and Ryder were both dead.
Her plan worked well.
Until it didn’t.
At the end of her shift at the shelter, Laura edged towards the back door. She’d just about made a clean escape when a firm hand gripped her wrist. She turned, the touch blazing fire up her arm. She already knew who that hand belonged to.
Lonely Rider - The Box Set: A Motorcycle Club Romance - The Complete Series Page 69
